Dating a Stripper?

Cobbe354 · 13-01-2011 06:43PM #1

Hi all.

I'm currently studying International Business in college.

But there is this girl in my course, she's 21, from Estonia, and she is extremely pretty. Doesn't talk too much, and seems quite shy. Me and my friends have recently been hanging out with her and some of the other girls from the course.

Turns out from one of her friends, that this girl I really like is single, and she is also into me

... sweet!

Thing is, turns out she is actually a Stripper. She does this to get by apparently.

Now i have just been told this today, and it made me think...

Should knowing what she does affect my feelings towards her, say if i wanted to ask her out some day?

It's really getting to me now.

I really like her, but hope knowing this would not interfere with a possible relationship.

So. Would you guys date a stripper?

Funkfield · 13-01-2011 06:58PM

Been there. Done that. Whats the problem?

MoodeRator · 13-01-2011 06:58PM

yes

Cobbe354 · 13-01-2011 07:03PM

Haha.

It's more of a subconscious feeling that her being a stripper could mean that she'd be disloyal in a relationship and probably a bit sleazy.

Also, if i brought her to dinner at the familys house, the amount of questions my brothers would ask haha. They'd eventually find out and they would make it very awkward for me.

More of an in my head problem then anything else. Maybe not such a big problem if I think of it.

Soul Stretcher · 13-01-2011 07:09PM

Yes I would.

Don't take this the wrong way OP - but you'd need to Man up quickly and build a bridge over this issue or you'll never have a chance with this girl.

She deserves a person who sees beyond what she does for a living. Fair dues to her for being independent and enterprising enough to step outside her comfort zone. No-one is harassed into going to strip-clubs to spend their hard-earned dough on dances.

If she gets a smell of a judgmental attitude from you, she'll rightly dismiss you as a suitor.

Good Luck.

Cobbe354 · 13-01-2011 07:13PM

Soul Stretcher wrote: »

Yes I would.

Don't take this the wrong way OP - but you'd need to Man up quickly and build a bridge over this issue or you'll never have a chance with this girl.

She deserves a person who sees beyond what she does for a living. Fair dues to her for being independent and enterprising enough to step outside her comfort zone. No-one is harassed into going to strip-clubs to spend their hard-earned dough on dances.

If she gets a smell of a judgmental attitude from you, she'll rightly dismiss you as a suitor.

Good Luck.

No, your absolutely right.

Thanks for the insight

. It's just i don't date much, last girlfriend i had was when i was about 16 and that was not even proper relationship. I'm 21 now and have to overcome this.

I'll try and play it cool and just accept it, even if it's a bit bothersome for a while.

Denisejcc · 13-01-2011 07:18PM

Cobbe354 wrote: »

Hi all.

Doesn't talk too much, and seems quite shy.
Thing is, turns out she is actually a Stripper.

Not so shy apparently :rolleyes::D:D

Just go for it OP, dont see why not, if you both like each other... Good Luck

pwd · 13-01-2011 07:22PM

What other people feel about this is irrelevant. It's whether you're ok with it yourself.

It's ok to have a problem with that, if that's what you're asking. It's ok not to have a problem with it too.

You need to ask yourself if you'd be ok with it. Dont wonder what other people will think, or what you should think. Try to figure out what *you* think. If you dont ask her out because you think you shouldn't, it will annoy you. If you do ask her out, but actually do have an issue with it, that would be crap too.

stimpson · 13-01-2011 07:28PM

I think I speak for everyone here when I say:

Pics or GTFO

TouchingVirus · 13-01-2011 07:54PM

stimpson wrote: »

I think I speak for everyone here when I say:

Pics or GTFO

Yes, but this isn't AH

Apparently she likes you OP. Think about that for a minute, because I don't know any particularly unattractive strippers - she is into you. And you like her. Even more than the physical attraction, you've been hanging out with this girl and getting to know her personality and she yours. After all that, you're still into each other. Personally, I fail to see the issue. It is a job, it'd be just as weird to bring back a girl who cleans toilets for a living as a girl who strips. Stripping isn't prostitution and forget about the whole meeting the family thing, that's counting chickens stuff...deal with the here and now. I'd go for it tbh

At the end of the day, us TGCers telling you what we would do in such a situation isn't relevant. All that's relevant is if you think you could get past the fact she strips for a living.

GodlessM · 13-01-2011 08:36PM

What matters mate is whether you would date a stripper, and the easy question to ask yourself here is would you be able to deal with knowing your girlfriend takes her clothes off for other people on a regular basis? Some guys would care, others wouldn't, either response is valid.

BopNiblets · 13-01-2011 09:08PM

TouchingVirus wrote: »

Yes, but this isn't AH

A Gentlemans Club without pictures of sexy ladies is no Gentlemans Club at all!
*takes hat and coat*
Good day!

MarkR · 13-01-2011 09:10PM

Time to cowboy up. What would Jesus do? He was friends with a prostitute. If he can do that, then surely a stripper is ok.

Wolfe Tone · 13-01-2011 09:27PM

If you are comfortable with her striping for other random men for money then go for it.

stimpson · 13-01-2011 10:05PM

TouchingVirus wrote: »

Yes, but this isn't AH

Indeed.

OP - I'd rather regret dating a stripper than regret not dating a stripper. Lifes to short to not date strippers.

Cobbe354 · 13-01-2011 10:43PM

Thank you all for the replies gentlemen + (and possibly some ladies), the feedback seems to point in the direction that i should give her a chance and shake any misconceptions off my mind.

Definitely want to be with this girl, her smile is amazing.

However it sort of bothers me knowing that she would take her clothes off for men.
Guess i'll have to get used to it.

tbh · 13-01-2011 11:11PM

I can understand why you're a bit wary but dude you're not marrying the girl. Take her out, see how it goes and don't get too serious too quickly. It might be that it dies on its arse long before the stripping becomes a problem, or it might be so good you wouldn't care if she was a FF minister. If it doesnt work, it doesnt work
If it were me tho, I wouldn't risk wondering what might have been, you know?

amazingemmet · 13-01-2011 11:36PM

Don't think of it as stripping think of it as her using her natural talents to take money off men who have too much.

crow_eat_crow · 13-01-2011 11:38PM

Didn't know there were any strip clubs in Dublin, tbh.

LostinBlanch · 14-01-2011 12:00AM

tbh wrote: »

or it might be so good you wouldn't care if she was a FF minister.

Ah jaysus tbh, you just had to go and lower the tone. Apologise :mad: [/AH]

As for the op, go for it. If she's that good looking and wants to go out with you, realise how lucky you are and go for it. If it doesn't work out, then at least you'll know you tried. If you don't have the balls to go for it, then you will regret it.

And starting threads later on like "I should have dated that stripper when I had a chance" aren't going to be much fun for you to write. All everyone will tell you is basically that you f*cked up. So save yourself future hassle, do yourself a favour and ask her out.

GodlessM · 14-01-2011 12:01AM

Also something of note; have you ever been to a strip club or seen a stripper of a private party? It's no longer just about taking the clothes off; there is definitely always some sort of sexual contact, usually gyrating or boobs in the face on the strippers part involved. That's something else you will need to accept and ultimately not mind at all if you go for it. Just make sure you have all the cards on the table before you play your hand is all.

LegacyUser · 14-01-2011 01:39AM

I don't have a problem with the profession in the slightest, if some one wants to strip then power to them. I would never look down on/judge some one who does, each to their own.

However I would have a problem if some one I was dating was stripping. I would have a problem with her getting in her nudey on a regular basis for other people's pleasure, for them to gawk at her. That's for me to gawk at

If my OH started I would have a problem, though then again we've been going out 4 years. Same way I wouldn't like to start stripping, it is a sexual thing, and I wouldn't consider that fair on my OH.

If it was someone I had just met and knew from the start what was what (like the OP), I wouldn't walk away because of it, but if things did start to get serious it would start to become an issue.

However if things do go somewhere, well you are in for some awesome private shows!

pwd · 14-01-2011 06:39AM

Honestly, from your language and uncertainty, I think you are likely to get headwrecked about this. You seem to be making your decision based on the consensus of a group of random strangers, rather than really nailing down how you feel yourself. I'll reiterate that what others think really is irrelevant here. People are wired very differently.

The abstract idea of going out with a stripper appeals to a lot of guys. Strippers are sexy. But many people would be bothered by the actual reality of it. Imaginary things often lack the emotional context that they would have in reality. A kid might enjoy pretending he is a soldier, killing lots of enemy soldiers. That doesn't mean he wouldn't be horrified if he killed someone in real life.

A more pertinent example would be between the reality and the fantasy of a threesome. A lot of guys who love the idea of that are freaked out when it comes to reality: "There's somebody kissing the girl I like :O"

How easily do you become sexually jealous? if you tend to get jealous at all easily then I think you should forget the idea. Do you get pissed off when random guys check out a girl you're with? How about if they do it in a sleazy and direct manner? What about if they offer them money for sex? Do any of these ideas fill you with rage? The last one would make me very angry anyway. I'd say strippers often have guys offering money for sex.

I think you really should take this slowly. Avoid becoming too emotionally involved too quickly, or maybe at all. Be honest with yourself about how you feel about the situation.

Peanut2011 · 14-01-2011 10:40AM

Cobbe354 wrote: »

Thank you all for the replies gentlemen + (and possibly some ladies), the feedback seems to point in the direction that i should give her a chance and shake any misconceptions off my mind.

Definitely want to be with this girl, her smile is amazing.

However it sort of bothers me knowing that she would take her clothes off for men.
Guess i'll have to get used to it.

OP, it obviously bothers you that she is a stripper. A lot of people here are saying just go for it, but I think you need to be sure what you are letting yourself in for.

Here is the question. Would you be comfortable if you started dating and one of your mates was to have bachelors party or you got invited to one. Stripper was ordered.. So far so good. Than she showed up!

Would you be ok having your girlfriend take all of her clothes off in front of all of them and dance around the groom to be in a very provocative way?

What if he grabbed her by the a**? What if she put her t**s on his eyes???

Would you be ok with that??

I guess if answer is NO to any of this than you have a problem as this is part and parcel of what you would be signing up for.

Even worse, you said your brothers would give you hard time. What if they hired her just to mess with you!

Sorry but there is no point in wrapping the answer up.

muletide · 14-01-2011 10:44AM

I think the best advice on this issue comes from Mr. Wyclef Jean.

He states, on the issue of relationships with exotic dancers;

"Just Cause She Dances Go-go That Don't Make Her A Ho-no, Call Up My Momma Tell Her I'm In Love With A Stripper Yo"?

Loco · 14-01-2011 10:46AM

You will regret it if you don't!

Bottle_of_Smoke · 14-01-2011 11:50AM

I'd go for it. Would probably be a turn on

Can see some potential pitfalls. IF you did start going out with her chances are she's given some people you know a lapdance before. Some places that would be getting fully naked and you know . . . might be awkward.

starbelgrade · 14-01-2011 11:54AM

She's a stripper, not a hooker.

Go for it dude.

chrisxii · 14-01-2011 01:17PM

she wont always be a stripper, but if shes right for you you will always have her,ask yourself is she the one for you long term, if not have some fun with her in the short term everyones a winner.:D

Smyth · 14-01-2011 04:23PM

I don't get half the replies here. Good on her! She's independant! Bravo to her! if you have a problem she deserves better.

Yup, have your opinion and that but I think it's warped tbh.

OP, I was at a bachelor party for a mater a while back. A lot of the lads had their faces rubbing on her tits, she was spreading her legs and flashing that which is dearest - whilst nude. Getting the guys to lick cream off her.

Wouldn't date a woman who'd do that. Ever.

Empowerment? Bravery?

Bollóx

BumbleB · 14-01-2011 04:36PM

Happens more often than you think.:)

Dating a Stripper?

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