Reconciling athiesm with godparenthood

Neil3030 · 08-12-2010 02:30PM #1

Have any athiests on here ever been asked to be a godparent? Can you decline? I'm not sure I'd (a) want to be a part of another mind being indoctrinated or (b) be comfortable with myself, morally, making promises and assurances I knew I wouldn't keep.

magicbastarder · 08-12-2010 02:31PM

yep, i'm godfather to my niece. i was told to keep my mouth shut on the altar, and the priest didn't ask me anything so no need to lie.

death1234567 · 08-12-2010 02:34PM

Yeah I'm a god parent. Didn't really bother me TBH its just a nonsense ceremony.

krudler · 08-12-2010 02:47PM

I am, like was said its a nonsense ceremony. Stand there and say you reject Satan and all his works (except his earlier, funnier stuff) then go get drunk. seems to be how most religious ceremonys in this country go.

Neil3030 · 08-12-2010 03:16PM

krudler wrote: »

I am, like was said its a nonsense ceremony. Stand there and say you reject Satan and all his works (except his earlier, funnier stuff) then go get drunk. seems to be how most religious ceremonys in this country go.

Back when Satan had integrity, eh?

So they don't ask you any specific questions like: "do you vow to raise this child in God's vision" or any crap like that?

krudler · 08-12-2010 03:19PM

Neil3030 wrote: »

Back when Satan had integrity, eh?

So they don't ask you any specific questions like: "do you vow to raise this child in God's vision" or any crap like that?

I cant remember tbh, was years ago, the role of godparent isnt really taken seriously anymore, its one of thise things you "have" to do so the older members of the family dont have kittens at the thought the new baby wont be baptised, my sister did it to keep our parents happy and that was it.

magicbastarder · 08-12-2010 03:28PM

Neil3030 wrote: »

So they don't ask you any specific questions like: "do you vow to raise this child in God's vision" or any crap like that?

depends on the priest, i suspect. i just had to stand up there and look responsible.

08-12-2010 03:30PM

I think it depends, pretty sure something was asked at the last ceremony I was at. And the godparents had to swear it.
Soooo no I would refuse as I'm not a christian

Viper_JB · 08-12-2010 03:30PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

yep, i'm godfather to my niece. i was told to keep my mouth shut on the altar, and the priest didn't ask me anything so no need to lie.

Pretty much same deal, with the odd mumble thrown in here and there. No real moral issue lying to an institution based on lies.

magicbastarder · 08-12-2010 03:39PM

bluewolf wrote: »

Soooo no I would refuse as I'm not a christian

would you refuse to be best man at a wedding ceremony for your best friend?

in the instance of being asked to be a godparent, i think i know which of the two options of refusing or accepting and glossing over the religious aspect is the lesser evil.

pretending to be a catholic for a couple of minutes is no worse than a man united fan wearing a liverpool jersey for a few minutes. it's not as if your soul is at stake.

krudler · 08-12-2010 03:45PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

would you refuse to be best man at a wedding ceremony for your best friend?

in the instance of being asked to be a godparent, i think i know which of the two options of refusing or accepting and glossing over the religious aspect is the lesser evil.

pretending to be a catholic for a couple of minutes is no worse than a man united fan wearing a liverpool jersey for a few minutes. it's not as if your soul is at stake.

Most people pretend to be catholics for their whole lives :pac:

"devout catholic I am!"
"agree that gays are evil, condoms spread aids and no sex before marriage do you?"
"errrr, except for that!"

Neil3030 · 08-12-2010 03:46PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

would you refuse to be best man at a wedding ceremony for your best friend?

in the instance of being asked to be a godparent, i think i know which of the two options of refusing or accepting and glossing over the religious aspect is the lesser evil.

pretending to be a catholic for a couple of minutes is no worse than a man united fan wearing a liverpool jersey for a few minutes. it's not as if your soul is at stake.

Massive difference. For starters, wedding is simply two people deciding to share their assets and contractually enshrine their monogomy. A christening is indoctrinating a helpless child into an institution of witchcraft and rape.

Dades · 08-12-2010 03:57PM

Neil3030 wrote: »

A christening is indoctrinating a helpless child into an institution of witchcraft and rape.

And maybe the local school!

Neil3030 · 08-12-2010 03:59PM

Dades wrote: »

And maybe the local school!

Outrageous but true.

krudler · 08-12-2010 04:01PM

Dades wrote: »

And maybe the local school!

Hogwarts?

Neil3030 · 08-12-2010 04:01PM

krudler wrote: »

Hogwarts?

National schools give preference to catholics when they are over quota.

Pushtrak · 08-12-2010 04:03PM

I'm not. My brother asked me, and I said I'd do it, as long as my lack of religion wouldn't be a problem to them. I didn't want to say no. They had a talk about it, and decided to go with someone else. Am very happy they did. I didn't even want to go in to the church, stayed outside most of it, and the bits where I was in there, I knew being up there would have pissed me off.

If someone asks me now, I just would say no. It isn't a debatable topic, I just wouldn't feel comfortable taking part in it. I can block out a lot of crap, like crap music, fools in a pub and so on, but partaking in any way, shape or form in this indoctrination repulses me.

bnt · 08-12-2010 04:13PM

I am one, but it's more of an honourary uncle setup - no ceremony or anything like that. My friends are doing the "nominal Christian" thing: bible stories, the occasional church visit, but not much more than that. I was a little concerned that that was a ruse to get me to a church or make a promise to teach the children religion, but they're not Catholic and just aren't aware of the solemnity of the role in the Catholic Church.

08-12-2010 04:16PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

would you refuse to be best man at a wedding ceremony for your best friend?

in the instance of being asked to be a godparent, i think i know which of the two options of refusing or accepting and glossing over the religious aspect is the lesser evil.

pretending to be a catholic for a couple of minutes is no worse than a man united fan wearing a liverpool jersey for a few minutes. it's not as if your soul is at stake.

Being a bridesmaid /maid of honour would be about organising things and witnessing. Not solemnly making a vow to raise a child in a religion I don't share and would have no intention of doing :rolleyes:

ballsymchugh · 08-12-2010 04:22PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

would you refuse to be best man at a wedding ceremony for your best friend?

best man/ bridesmaid is all about being a witness to the signing of the register at the end of the wedding. there's no religious element to it.

edit: what she said!

Knasher · 08-12-2010 04:39PM

I think it depends on the role that the parents would expect me to take more than anything else. For instance if the parents just see it as a religious ceremony and don't care if an atheist takes part, then I would view it as an honor to be asked and have no problem with it. If the parent sees it as a commitment to guide the child's religious upbringing then clearly I would be unsuitable so I would have to refuse. Finally if the parents view it as a commitment to look after the child should anything happen to them then its a question if I would be willing to do that in such an eventuality.

In all cases whats important is the parents interpretation and not the ceremony itself.

robindch · 08-12-2010 04:53PM

krudler wrote: »

Hogwarts?

At least the magic there is credible

krudler · 08-12-2010 04:53PM

Knasher wrote: »

I think it depends on the role that the parents would expect me to take more than anything else. For instance if the parents just see it as a religious ceremony and don't care if an atheist takes part, then I would view it as an honor to be asked and have no problem with it. If the parent sees it as a commitment to guide the child's religious upbringing then clearly I would be unsuitable so I would have to refuse. Finally if the parents view it as a commitment to look after the child should anything happen to them then its a question if I would be willing to do that in such an eventuality.

In all cases whats important is the parents interpretation and not the ceremony itself.

Thats basically what i asked my sister about the religous side, her repsonse was "what? no just make sure you get him something good for his birthdays if you're his godfather" :pac:

Choochtown · 08-12-2010 06:29PM

I did it over 18 years ago. My beautiful goddaughter celebrates her 19th birthday in a few months and I think I've done a great job guiding her spiritually.

She's a 100% confirmed atheist!

strobe · 08-12-2010 06:41PM

I wouldn't do it. I'd make it clear that I was honoured to be asked and that if they wanted me to be someone to look out for the kid throughout it's life and/or to look after the child should it be orphaned I would do my utmost to do that but I wouldn't stand in a Catholic church and be part of the baptism ritual.

I don't think I know anyone close enough to me that would ask me to take on that responsibility that would have any problem whatsoever with that response. If they did then I would probably be the wrong person to ask in the first place and they should approach someone else in anyway.

WeeBushy · 08-12-2010 07:42PM

I'm a god parent, and I don't have any problem with it. If they had asked me to take an interest in his religious upbringing I would have, but in our family anyway the role of the god parent is basically be that cool older person who buys you presents and takes an extra interest in your life.

I was in South Africa at the time of the christening as well so didn't have to take part in the whole ceremony, my dad stood in for me, so really it worked out perfectly.

I love it as well, it was quite an honour to be asked to take an interest in his life and generally be there for him. Its not considered a religious role in our family so I really like the idea.

My brother is also the god father to the other child so now we get to compete them against eachother which will be fun

ColmDawson · 08-12-2010 07:50PM

strobe wrote: »

I wouldn't do it. I'd make it clear that I was honoured to be asked and that if they wanted me to be someone to look out for the kid throughout it's life and/or to look after the child should it be orphaned I would do my utmost to do that but I wouldn't stand in a Catholic church and be part of the baptism ritual.

I don't think I know anyone close enough to me that would ask me to take on that responsibility that would have any problem whatsoever with that response. If they did then I would probably be the wrong person to ask in the first place and they should approach someone else in anyway.

This.

magicbastarder · 08-12-2010 07:52PM

bluewolf wrote: »

Being a bridesmaid /maid of honour would be about organising things and witnessing. Not solemnly making a vow to raise a child in a religion I don't share and would have no intention of doing :rolleyes:

i did not make any vows (may have been unusual at the baptism i was at) and the parents were under no illusions that i would not have anything to do with a religious upbringing. i'm not talking about what the church expects from the ceremony, i'm talking about the intentions and good will of the parents.

ShooterSF · 08-12-2010 07:59PM

I wouldn't do it. Not only have I issues with the religious thing, I just plain don't like kids and it would be cruel to the child to have a special relative/family friend that probably doesn't like them...

philologos · 08-12-2010 09:07PM

magicbastarder wrote: »

yep, i'm godfather to my niece. i was told to keep my mouth shut on the altar, and the priest didn't ask me anything so no need to lie.

How did you manage this?

Don't they not ask if you believe in Christ, and reject the Devil and his works and so on? Or is this just a CofI thing?

magicbastarder · 08-12-2010 09:45PM

to be honest, i dunno. maybe the priest was in a rush. the best part of the ceremony for me was the other kid being baptised was about 12 and had his hair spiked for the occasion - the priest poured the water on his head, and then put his hand on it as part of the blessing. and had to get a towel to wipe the wet hair gel off his hand.

Reconciling athiesm with godparenthood

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