Cruel/Funny punishments from your childhood

stovelid · 06-12-2010 09:54PM

Used to get sent down to the local parochial house in hot-pants.

kylith · 06-12-2010 09:59PM

Purple Lemons wrote: »

My parents punished me as a child, but thank f**k this crazy biatch wasn't my mammy, poor child.

Holy fúcking gods. I really hope that that woman had all her children taken away from her. That kind of reminded me of A Child Called It. I'd take 5 with the wooden spoon rather than that any day.

Seloth · 06-12-2010 10:14PM

Reminds me of war of the buttons "My Dad threatened to send me away." "Wheres that?" "Away!"

Lol my ad once threatend too call the man to take me away ><.

My mam used to attempt too ground me,so I used to climb out the window and ran around the garden,so then she nailed the window shut so the next time I brought a harmer with me and pulled out the nails :L.

ejmaztec · 06-12-2010 10:42PM

Seloth wrote: »

Reminds me of war of the buttons "My Dad threatened to send me away." "Wheres that?" "Away!"

Lol my ad once threatend too call the man to take me away ><.

My mam used to attempt too ground me,so I used to climb out the window and ran around the garden,so then she nailed the window shut so the next time I brought a harmer with me and pulled out the nails :L.

She obviously didn't want you to come back.

DetectivFoxtrot · 06-12-2010 10:50PM

My dad wasn't afraid to throw a slap, at any of us growing up (3 girls, 1 boy). I went through a 'shoplifting' phase, and remember being caught and being brought home by a copper. My dad opened the door and nearly died when he saw the cop. In we went and the cop explained what went down, all the while I was eyeballing the oul lad and hoping the copper'd stay because I knew I'd be getting a dig as soon as he left. Well he left, and yes, I got a dig.

My dad died last Wednesday and this story actually brings a massive smile to my face. Would take a bullet for the guy, 10 times over.

cocoshovel · 07-12-2010 12:12AM

I think most people here would of gotten the oul'd wooden spoon against their arse a few times. I used to be terrified of that thing!

LadyE · 07-12-2010 12:32AM

DetectivFoxtrot wrote: »

My dad wasn't afraid to throw a slap, at any of us growing up (3 girls, 1 boy). I went through a 'shoplifting' phase, and remember being caught and being brought home by a copper. My dad opened the door and nearly died when he saw the cop. In we went and the cop explained what went down, all the while I was eyeballing the oul lad and hoping the copper'd stay because I knew I'd be getting a dig as soon as he left. Well he left, and yes, I got a dig.

My dad died last Wednesday and this story actually brings a massive smile to my face. Would take a bullet for the guy, 10 times over.

Sorry for your loss

falipo · 07-12-2010 01:25AM

My dad would blare Daniel O' Donnell or some other sh!te with the windows down on the way to school if we were acting up. My mother would also take us down to the market to buy jocks, take them out of their packet, hold them up in the air so everyone could see and then put them up to us pretending she was checking the size. She could be an awful witch.

skyhighflyer · 07-12-2010 01:27AM

That lady isn't very nice, but I heard she didn't change her facebook photo to a cartoon character this week so I'll give her props for not following the crowd unlike most of my eejit mates.

skyhighflyer · 07-12-2010 01:30AM

Also, my Dad thought embarassment was the best punishment. Like, we'd be in the supermarket or somewhere and he'd shout 'Hey everyone, I'm skyhighflyer's Da' and start dancing around the place or singing or loudly examining various birth control products. Embarassment definitely keeps teenagers in line more then punishment.

falan · 07-12-2010 01:37AM

Cutting the grass and hedge in the front garden with a scissors while all your mates are out in the street taking the piss out of you...

Rockery Woman · 07-12-2010 01:39AM

skyhighflyer wrote: »

Also, my Dad thought embarassment was the best punishment. Like, we'd be in the supermarket or somewhere and he'd shout 'Hey everyone, I'm skyhighflyer's Da' and start dancing around the place or singing or loudly examining various birth control products. Embarassment definitely keeps teenagers in line more then punishment.

Good one - my Da was as bad! Once he brought me and my 3 sisters to the local chipper (I was about 15) and the place was packed with customers, he ordered food for us and announced loudly "dont poision my childer now Mick" I wanted the ground to swallow me up!

Another time he ordered chicken curry and said he wanted chicken in it this time - he would have been barred if he wasnt spending so much money there!:D

flas · 07-12-2010 02:26AM

a clip around the ear as my parents called it! or else the wait for your father to get home line from mam! terrifying when really young but as i got older i realised that dad wouldnt do anything! in fact i remember one saturday before going down town with mam i was messing and she goes your not coming now today, il wait til your father gets home and you can sit here with him for the day!

best saturday ever, when mam was gone he got me a can of coke and crisps in the shop and a take away from chipper later on! remember it as my first saturday watching nothing but football! was fantastic!! and mam felt ad and brought me home a toy car for me to build!ha!

Voodoomelon · 07-12-2010 03:10AM

As mentioned several times, the wooden spoon was my dads tool of choice at night time when me and my brother were messing the whole night instead of going to sleep.

He once broke the spoon over me bare arse after a few swings, I was well chuffed.

George83 · 07-12-2010 12:41PM

Good God that clip is awful.

My parents used to go down the route of guilt tripping me - if you behave like that it hurts us etc etc. I got the odd clip round the ear but that's it, tbh I reckon I'd have preferred a slap to the emotional stuff.

Qwert1 · 07-12-2010 12:52PM

Remember I had a teacher when I was 5/6 who used to wash kids' mouths out with a bar of soap if she caught them cursing. Didn't even have to be anything too bad, just drat or flip or something like that. Evil witch!

Truley · 07-12-2010 01:08PM

I'm only 22 but I have alot of friends who would have been slapped with sticks, wooden spoons and belts. I thought that sort of practice would have stopped by the nineties, clearly not. It's was still quite common.

I had another friend who's mother used to wash her mouth with soap or mustard if she swore. And an ex boyfriend who's father would wack him with a riding crop!

Duggy747 · 07-12-2010 01:25PM

The Mammy had the wooden spoon.........the dreaded weapon of choice. When you were acting the git and you heard that drawer slam in the kitchen then you got the fùck out of the house and ran for your life!

She actually broke it over my head before, she wasn't an abusive Mammy it was just a mixture of me having a thick head and the spoon being of shìtty quality :pac:

Everyone has been kicked out of the house at one point, most recently was my older sister (for the first time) over a stupid argument on her buying a house.

Other than that, it was just the usual slaps and kicks up the arse! Nothing that wasn't deserved, I guess..............might explain why I cry in a foetal position in the shower every night :pac:

Riddle101 · 07-12-2010 03:39PM

Qwert1 wrote: »

Remember I had a teacher when I was 5/6 who used to wash kids' mouths out with a bar of soap if she caught them cursing. Didn't even have to be anything too bad, just drat or flip or something like that. Evil witch!

Seriously?

thebigbiffo · 07-12-2010 04:12PM

my folks weren't the best punishers - mostly just a good roar our of them.

my old primary school principal however - he was some piece of work. most people find this hard to believe but i witnessed him slagging this lad because of his family and the fact all of them had big ears. he hit him a few slaps and then - seriously - lifted him up by the head/ears and banged his head off the ceiling a few times.

i still think about that poor f'ucker now and again and wonder how you could ever get over that type of humiliation when you're only 6-7 years old.

what a c'unt that fella was - i'd love to meet the bastard now let me tell ya.

blaze1 · 07-12-2010 04:18PM

no real punishment, the ma was just a fruit cake...
thank god for growing older and getting more patience

scarymoon1 · 07-12-2010 04:29PM

wooden spoon

kylith · 07-12-2010 04:47PM

cocoshovel wrote: »

I think most people here would of gotten the oul'd wooden spoon against their arse a few times. I used to be terrified of that thing!

The worst bit was being sent to get the wooden spoon. Not only was I going to get a slap, I had to go and get it for her. I never moved so slowly in my life.

George83 wrote: »

Good God that clip is awful.

My parents used to go down the route of guilt tripping me - if you behave like that it hurts us etc etc. I got the odd clip round the ear but that's it, tbh I reckon I'd have preferred a slap to the emotional stuff.

Agreed. I hated it when my mum switched from giving me a smack on the legs to going "I'm so disappointed in you. You've really let me down..." Always felt so guilty.

Truley · 07-12-2010 09:55PM

kylith wrote: »

The worst bit was being sent to get the wooden spoon. Not only was I going to get a slap, I had to go and get it for her. I never moved so slowly in my life.

I would have just refused to!

Bazzo · 07-12-2010 10:20PM

Eh, I used to get threatened with the wooden spoon I don't think I ever got a smack more than once or twice...

My mam once told me and one of my sisters(we're the 2 youngest) that if we made noise during mass the priest would put us in a room full of spiders...

Sticky_Fingers · 07-12-2010 11:01PM

A flip flop was my mothers nuclear option, we had to have done something really bad for it to be brought out though. The main tactic in getting us to behave was the good old fashioned guilt trip.

My cousins on the other hand used to chased around the kitchen by their father with a leather belt if they did anything even remotely wrong. He was an evil drunken b@stard with a mean temper and I was terrified of him when I was younger. He's dead now and and as bad as it is to say I'm glad because he was some nasty piece of work.

Qwert1 · 08-12-2010 12:25AM

Riddle101 wrote: »

Seriously?

Ya, she was as crazy as they come.

Run_to_da_hills · 08-12-2010 12:32AM

Dean09 wrote: »

No offence but your Da seems like a bit of a cúnt

Nope, its just that the OP never explained the content of the movies.

The Big Red Button · 08-12-2010 12:34AM

When we were bold, my dad used to tell us that Jack Frost was going to "get" us!

Bit of an odd one really ...

It terrified us though, for some reason!!

kowloon · 08-12-2010 12:40AM

I would take special pleasure in smearing hot sauce into that nasty hags eyes.

Cruel/Funny punishments from your childhood

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