Cruel/Funny punishments from your childhood

turnfan

When I was younger I nearly burnt the house down doing homemade science experiments, so as a punishment my dad made me burn a load of movies that I had borrowed from my mate at school. So that I would have to explain to someone why I burnt their stuff. Makes a lot of sense now, but at the time I thought it was the worst punishment ever! I never told the mate what happened to his stuff though!

So has anyone got some good repressed punishments they'd like to share? *Fritzel joke tsunami*

El Guapo!

No offence but your Da seems like a bit of a cúnt

KeithM89_old

We used to have a massive ball of string out in the garage, if i was bold, my mam/dad would unravel the whole thing and id have to roll it all back up before i could get back in the living room

Dudess

Jesus, did your dad replace the movies...? :eek:

Senna

When i was 12 my mum caught me smoking and made me smoke the rest of the pack, thinking it would stop me from smoking ever again.
Jokes on her, 20 years later and i'm a 40-a-day man

turnfan

Nope. He didn't replace them! They weren't the best movies, I think Freejack might have been one if them...

MistyCheese

I remember this one time I was caught having sex and, as punishment, I was made have sex with my parents.

Ah, you think it sucks so hard at the time but when you look back...

turnfan

That will teach you to keep away from the family dog

Charlie.

Dean09 wrote: »

No offence but your Da seems like a bit of a cúnt

Yeah surely that meant your mate suffered more than you did even though he did nothing wrong

turnfan

I think it was a social experiment of some sort.

Giselle

turnfan wrote: »

When I was younger I nearly burnt the house down doing homemade science experiments, so as a punishment my dad made me burn a load of movies that I had borrowed from my mate at school. So that I would have to explain to someone why I burnt their stuff. Makes a lot of sense now, but at the time I thought it was the worst punishment ever! I never told the mate what happened to his stuff though!

So has anyone got some good repressed punishments they'd like to share? *Fritzel joke tsunami*

Is it just me, or does that actually make no sense at all?

Was he punishing you by proxy or was your dad punishing your mate?

reap-a-rat

In our house, in the drawer under the cutlery drawer, mam kept what we called "the black belt".. it was like a pice of kinda hardened rubber or something, but you could bend it in such a way that it would make the loudest SNAP kind of noise.

Anyway, anytime we were bold, she'd take it out, make the noise, and tell us if we did whatever again, she'd whip us with it... Never did though, thank christ! I get sore after a towel snap, I'd never survive that:o!

El Guapo!

Charlie. wrote: »

Yeah surely that meant your mate suffered more than you did even though he did nothing wrong

Yeah exactly.

"Son, you've been bold....................go burn your friends stuff"

El Guapo!

reap-a-rat wrote: »

In our house, in the drawer under the cutlery drawer, mam kept what we called "the black belt".. it was like a pice of kinda hardened rubber or something,

Butt plug?

scientific1982

I used to just get batterings. My parents werent very imaginative.

Rockery Woman

Most of my childhood punishments involved the wooden spoon and the wet dishcloth across the bare legs.:eek:

I used to stand on the kneeler in mass cos my mother is so much shorter than me and because the dishcloth and wooden spoon weren't acceptable punishments in the church she used to pinch me really hard.

Once she made a dive for me with the wooden spoon and I held up a kitchen chair to protect myself and she nearly broke her arm on it!

Im 35 now but she still says "you're not too big for a slap you know"!!!!!

Love ya Mammy xxxx

turnfan

I found it harder to burn someone else's stuff rather than my own. I got my mate a few more videos so that was ok

Taco Corp

Bamboo cane to the back of my bare leg. Fcuking hurt. Don't know what I did but my dad chased me down the lawn just to hit me.

Micilin Muc

Poured orange juice over my porridge a few times and was made to eat it! I thinked I learned my lesson after the second accident.

reap-a-rat

Rockery Woman wrote: »

Love ya Mammy xxxx

Flattery will get ya nowhere, you're getting such a beatin' for that post:mad:!

Darksaga87

My Da was in the army, he threatened to send me to Lebanon once.

zero19

Micilin Muc wrote: »

Poured orange juice over my porridge a few times and was made to eat it! I thinked I learned my lesson after the second accident.

That sounds tasty

poisonated

I was sometimes locked in the garden.

krudler

Our father used to use a man with one hand named J. Walter Weatherman to teach us lessons like to remind him about getting milk and wearing seatbelts.

anniehoo

Rockery Woman wrote: »

Most of my childhood punishments involved the wooden spoon

*shudder* yep i remember the wooden spoon. My god that thing hurt! Just taking it out of the drawer was enough to stop us messin!

Poor Uncle Tom

Charlie. wrote: »

Yeah surely that meant your mate suffered more than you did even though he did nothing wrong

Yes it did...........and don't call him Shirley!


I pulled a chair out from under my dad as he was about to sit down. When he caught me he beat me with his belt from the back of my neck to my heels, drew blood through my cloths. The memory is still vivid 40 years on, it hurt the most on the backs of my knees for some reason, it only happened once.

Dudess

:eek:

Purple Lemons

My parents punished me as a child, but thank f**k this crazy biatch wasn't my mammy, poor child.

alwaysadub

Wooden spoon was the main one.
Being the youngest of 8 i usually got some type of hiding most days from my siblings anyway.

Saila

turnfan wrote: »

I think it was a social experiment of some sort.

he failed..

turnfan wrote: »

I found it harder to burn someone else's stuff rather than my own. I got my mate a few more videos so that was ok

so you got a choice to burn yours or your mates stuff :P

Dudess

Purple Lemons wrote: »

My parents punished me as a child, but thank f**k this crazy biatch wasn't my mammy, poor child.

Holy fuk, how is a person actually able to do stuff like that to their kid?!

That's not discipline, teaching the child right and wrong... that's abuse.

dubtom

Reminds me not of a punishment but a story of a child getting back at Daddy.
This lad hears noises coming from his parents bedroom so goes in and see's his Mother bent over the dresser and his dad banging away, his dad looks at him and winks.He closes the door,feeling,well, you can guess. Later his father is passing the boys room and hears a noise,he enters and see the young lad banging away at the lads Granny,the lad looks at his Dad and winks,and says, see how it feels when it's your Mother.






May not be true

Purple Lemons

That C U Next Tuesday deserves to have that child removed from her care!


The child is adopted btw.

epgc3fyqirnbsx

I was gonna post a 'funny' reply but that clip really pissed me off. Poor kid is gonna be too terrified to open his mouth for fear of doing wrong

Purple Lemons

Winston Crashing Upholstery wrote: »

I was gonna post a 'funny' reply but that clip really pissed me off. Poor kid is gonna be too terrified to open his mouth for fear of doing wrong

Pissing people off wasn't the intention of the post, apologies.

Just thought I'd post it to show that there's a line you do not cross whilst punishing children, and that poor excuse of a human being crossed it.

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Purple Lemons wrote: »

Pissing people off wasn't the intention of the post, apologies.

Just thought I'd post it to show that there's a line you do not cross whilst punishing children, and that poor excuse of a human being crossed it.

Oh jesus don't apologise, you didn't piss me off. The fact that there are aul wagons like that did

Coriolanus

Used to hang my little brother up by his trousers in the utility room in the coat hooks.

Edit. Didn't read the thread. Ee never got punished much by our parents. Made each others lives hello enough.

rannerap

I dont ever remember being punished really, I do remember the threat of the old wooden spoon though!:D

Riddle101

My parent never really gave me any cruel/funny punishments just getting grounded or a plain old smack on the arse was punishment from my mam. My dad didn't need to punish me he just had that way with me where I never wanted to get on his bad side cause he was such a frightening guy when angry. Actually sometimes my mam used to tell me that she'd tell my dad if I did something wrong again(whatever it was I did wrong) and that would be enough to make me feel sorry.

Jesus Wept

Dudess wrote: »

Holy fuk, how is a person actually able to do stuff like that to their kid?!

That's not discipline, teaching the child right and wrong... that's abuse.

For good measure, she was allowed to adopt him.
Had 6 or 7 kids in total, can't remember which.

WindSock

Yeah that child with the hot sauce is unnerving, but it would be awesome to have a parent like this

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=69372800&postcount=5731

Princess Peach

I never got punished.

I was a good girl

Jesus Wept

Not anymore though.

Princess Peach

The-Rigger wrote: »

Not anymore though.

eddie the eagle

when i was about 8 I threw a big brick through my neighbours car window. i spent the rest of the afternoon hiding under our car. i was told i was gonna get it when my dad came home from work.

a few hours later im in my room and hear my dad coming home, he goes back out again and comes back a while after that. so up the stairs he comes and i'm hidding under my bed. he's standing by the bed telling me that the police were downstairs waiting to bring me to jail. he had asked them if it was alright if he came up alone to bring me down. he shows me a pair of handcuffs that the cops had giving him for me. i freaked. fecker had gone out and got some toy handcuffs from somewhere

Dudess

The-Rigger wrote: »

For good measure, she was allowed to adopt him.
Had 6 or 7 kids in total, can't remember which.

What a kunt...

krudler

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SP1kKcZtnkQ

just before 7.00 into this, explains child raising brilliantly, theres no need for punishment, just let them fcuk things up and teach themselves

3hn2givr7mx1sc

Purple Lemons wrote: »

My parents punished me as a child, but thank f**k this crazy biatch wasn't my mammy, poor child.

What a cold hearted bitch.

qwerty2010

.....

krudler

qwerty2010 wrote: »

was sent round to the local paedophile .. nearly every day

I was made go to mass as well

qwerty2010

yeah hilarious