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Most stupid tourist questions asked!

  • 16-11-2010 12:46PM
    #1
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭


    Some of the most inexplicably simple queries fielded by tourism officials. :pac:

    "Are there any lakes in the Lake District?"

    "In what month is the May Day demonstration?"

    "What is the entry fee for Brighton?"

    "Why on earth did they build Windsor Castle on the flight path of Heathrow?"

    "Is Wales closed during the winter?" :o

    "Can you tell me who performs at the circus in Piccadilly?" :pac:

    "Why did they build so many ruined castles and abbeys in England?"
    (Asked a tourist at Whitby Abbey, North Yorkshire)

    "What time do you switch the mist off?"
    (Asked a visitor to Dover Castle and the Secret Wartime Tunnels, in Kent)

    "Which bus do I get from the Orkney Islands to the Shetland Islands?"

    "What time of night does the Loch Ness monster surface and who feeds it?"

    "Is Edinburgh in Glasgow?"

    "Can I wear high heels in Australia?" :confused:

    "Was this man-made?"
    (Asked a tourist at the Grand Canyon National Park)

    "Do you know of any undiscovered ruins?" - DOH!!! :pac:
    (Asked a tourist at the Mesa Verde National Park)


    Source: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/picturegalleries/4973350/20-stupid-questions-asked-by-tourists.html


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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭OutlawPete


    I was asked which side of the Liffey the Ha'penny bridge was on :cool:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,808 ✭✭✭✭chin_grin


    Oh Biggins!

    <muted trumpet sound>


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 16,057 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tabnabs


    Asked by an elderly American couple onboard a Cunard cruise ship.

    Is that lift out of action on every deck?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,178 ✭✭✭✭NothingMan


    I wasn't there but I met a couple of English folk while traveling that had this run in with an American family.

    English guys: "Sorry, do you know how to get into the tower?"
    American Man: "What tower?"
    English guys: *look up at huge tower right beside them*
    American woman: "The tower we just came down from honey"
    American Man: "Oh right, over there. Do you guys know where the castle is?"
    English guys: *Looks at giant castle attached to tower* "Eh... That castle?"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,417 ✭✭✭Miguel_Sanchez


    What is all this Biggins?

    Is it cut and paste day in After Hours?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,106 ✭✭✭flyton5


    Enough with the copy and paste stuff Biggins.


    Now, get back in your cupboard...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,779 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    I just stopped an American guy from booking a hostel in Vienna. Only clicked when he said he wanted somewhere close to the canals.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,461 ✭✭✭--Kaiser--


    What is all this Biggins?

    Is it cut and paste day in After Hours?

    Well, it's better than all the miserable shite that's been doing the rounds lately. AH could do with a bit of levity.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,101 ✭✭✭MitchKoobski


    "Can you make some Waterford style glass for me?" asked the American family, while I was standing on front of the 'TO LET' sign in front of Waterford Glass Factory.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,417 ✭✭✭Miguel_Sanchez


    --Kaiser-- wrote: »
    AH could do with a bit of levity.

    No matter how hard we try we're not going to make the forum float.


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    I get asked quite a bit the direction to "Kelly's Book"!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,369 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    We want more copy and paste - yay!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    You got it! LOL

    The most ridiculous complaints made by holidaymakers to their travel agent, taken from research by Thomas Cook and ABTA.

    * A tourist at a top African game lodge overlooking a waterhole, who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel "inadequate".

    * A woman threatened to call police after claiming that she’d been locked in by staff. When in fact, she had mistaken the “do not disturb” sign on the back of the door as a warning to remain in the room.

    * "The beach was too sandy." :eek:

    * A guest at a Novotel in Australia complained his soup was too thick and strong. He was inadvertently slurping the gravy at the time. :o

    * "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."

    * "We bought 'Ray-Ban' sunglasses for five euros (£3.50) from a street trader, only to find out they were fake." - LOL DOH!!!

    * "No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled."

    * "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England - it only took the Americans three hours to get home.

    * "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked." :pac: :pac: :pac:

    * "I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller." :rolleyes:

    * "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation'. We're trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying here?" :pac:

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/picturegalleries/5005019/20-ridiculous-complaints-made-by-holidaymakers.html?image=1


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,838 ✭✭✭phill106


    Bunratty castle is lovely, but why did they build it so close to the highway?


    and


    Can you tell me the road to zero zero la?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,079 ✭✭✭dancingqueen


    "Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to the Rock of Cashelle?" an American man once asked me. I was standing under a sign, which pointed to "The Rock of Cashel" about 10m from the actual Rock of Cashel.

    He told me he thought it was just a Rock, not a monastery.... eh?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,808 ✭✭✭FatherLen


    Biggins wrote: »
    hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant.
    ha glad i have never heard those words.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,092 ✭✭✭catbear


    From 'overheard in Dublin".

    Nice polite elderly American couple consult map while standing on O'Connell Street. "I don't know hun, I think it's that way. let's ask these young athletes standing on the corner".


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    phill106 wrote: »
    Bunratty castle is lovely, but why did they build it so close to the highway?

    O' dear gawd!!! :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,808 ✭✭✭✭chin_grin


    catbear wrote: »
    From 'overheard in Dublin".

    Nice polite elderly American couple consult map while standing on O'Connell Street. "I don't know hun, I think it's that way. let's ask these young athletes standing on the corner".

    ............I don't get it..............:confused:

    Also if it's from Overheard I have to question its authenticity.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    "Excuse me, Miss, can you tell me where to find leprauchans around here?"

    :rolleyes:

    I didn't have the heart to tell her they weren't real, so I pointed down the road and walked on.
    Years later, she's probably still there, in the middle of some field, searching! :pac:


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,838 ✭✭✭phill106


    chin_grin wrote: »
    ............I don't get it..............:confused:

    Also if it's from Overheard I have to question its authenticity.

    They thought dublin skangers were athletes because they were wearing tracksuits and tackies!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,808 ✭✭✭FatherLen


    "Excuse me, Miss, can you tell me where to find leprauchans around here?"

    :rolleyes:

    I didn't have the heart to tell her they weren't real, so I pointed down the road and walked on.
    Years later, she's probably still there, in the middle of some field, searching! :pac:

    *cough* bullshit *cough*


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,160 ✭✭✭Kimono-Girl


    most stupid tourist question asked....by American's walking through the city centre,

    "why can we not see the blarney castle, the flyer said you could see it in cork"


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    "Excuse me, Miss, can you tell me where to find leprauchans around here?"

    :rolleyes:

    I didn't have the heart to tell her they weren't real, so I pointed down the road and walked on.
    Years later, she's probably still there, in the middle of some field, searching! :pac:


    Sorry Pika....the correct way Americans pronounce Leprauchaun is,in fact "Lepreechin"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 954 ✭✭✭PaddyBomb


    Asked by an American woman in the 20th century art section in the National Gallery of Ireland.

    Tourist: Why is this called the 20th century section?

    Me: Because all the paintings were done in the 20th century.

    Tourist: Then what about this one, it says it was painted in 1936.

    Me:.......


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    phill106 wrote: »
    They thought dublin skangers were athletes because they were wearing tracksuits and tackies!


    Overheard in Dublin is aload of shiite..americans may be a bit thick but even they know scum when they see it hanging around.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    I don't like travelling, too many foreigners. :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,283 ✭✭✭Ross_Mahon


    "Can you tell me where the spike is?"

    *Standing beside The Spire*


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,088 ✭✭✭celticbest


    An American couple on Henry Street stopped a friend of mine & asked for directions to cork & if it would take more then an hour to walk to........

    When my friend said you couldn't walk to Cork & it was about a 5 hour drive they replied it looks very close to Dublin on the map..............


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,146 ✭✭✭✭robinph


    After some Polish girl had given a tour of some tourist thing some where in the middle of nowhere in Ireland (sorry I forgot what it was) and explained what it was all about she then started making general conversation with the rest of the group.

    Polish girl: So, where are you from then?
    Some English guys: Surrey.
    Polish girl: WHERE ARE YOU FROM?


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