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Sex before Marriage

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Comments

  • #242
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    steve06 wrote: »
    I'm of the opinion that compromise shouldn't be an option, it means settling for less than you want. Why do that?

    I see good things ahead for you.


  • #243
    starlit
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,349 ✭✭✭✭starlit


    Proper poll now! Excuse me for my blunnder last time clicked wrong option when saving thread and forgot the click tick box for poll my bad sorry everyone!:eek::o

    So further ado....The god almight poll which isnt a pole! :cool:

    I am in favour of sex before marriage....:P but still two minds about it!


  • #244
    mojesius
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,394 ✭✭✭mojesius


    I still can't see anything. I must be gone blind from all the pre-marital sex.

    EDIT: No, there it is, the nuns lied to me.


  • #245
    dr.bollocko
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,946 Mod ✭✭✭✭dr.bollocko


    Thread and poll merged.


  • #246
    starlit
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,349 ✭✭✭✭starlit


    NEW Poll up! :)


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  • #247
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    prinz wrote: »
    It cannot guarantee every sexual practice, position, etc etc etc. but it can cover 99.9% of things. Anything that you haven't discussed shouldn't be a big enough issue for the marriage to come a-cropper over tbh.



    Well then they reallly didn't have a pretty good idea, did they?



    You can always break up if you value whatever act/position etc you want more than the person you are in the relationship with. Then again when it comes to a married couple I don't think something like that should even come to that stage tbh, or else the parties involved didn't prepare themselves properly for marriage.



    In effect yes. The more you discuss, the more ground you cover, the more hypotheticals you can discuss etc means less chance of a serious problem later on in a relationship when it comes to something like this. Basic, basic.

    I've highlighted the important bits. Basically, you're saying you can discuss for years upon years to ''prepare'' yourself, but in reality it's never guaranteed.

    The only thing you can do to guarantee your sexual compatibility is...... dun Dun DUN.... have sex.

    Thankfully most normal people with normal ideologies accept this fact.


  • #248
    starlit
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,349 ✭✭✭✭starlit


    thank you dr.bollocko ! :cool:


  • #249
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    The only thing you can do to guarantee your sexual compatibility is...... dun Dun DUN.... have sex..

    Actually that doesn't guarantee anything either so we're back to square one. It works for some people, it doesn't work for others. The concept that you must 'try before you buy'/or that you'll never know if your compatible or not unless you have sex before marriage is rubbish.


  • #250
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    My name is URL wrote: »
    This is the most retarded argument I've ever seen. If two people, who waited until after they were married to have sex, are still a happy couple after marriage, then it's idiotic to say that they are 'incompatible' with each other.

    Erm, who said they aren't compatible?


  • #251
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    prinz wrote: »
    It cannot guarantee every sexual practice, position, etc etc etc. but it can cover 99.9% of things. Anything that you haven't discussed shouldn't be a big enough issue for the marriage to come a-cropper over tbh.
    This is hilarious, I'm imagining people going through a sideshow presentation of what they like and don't like...
    prinz wrote: »
    You can always break up if you value whatever act/position etc you want more than the person you are in the relationship with. Then again when it comes to a married couple I don't think something like that should even come to that stage tbh, or else the parties involved didn't prepare themselves properly for marriage.
    You shouldn't have to prepare for marriage, you should be able to walk into it knowing what you're getting involved with from experience of the person.
    prinz wrote: »
    In effect yes. The more you discuss, the more ground you cover, the more hypotheticals you can discuss etc means less chance of a serious problem later on in a relationship when it comes to something like this. Basic, basic.
    Or you could just shag...
    My name is URL wrote: »
    If two people, who waited until after they were married to have sex, are still a happy couple after marriage, then it's idiotic to say that they are 'incompatible' with each other.
    We're talking about not being compatible in the bedroom, and only finding out once you're married because you never tried it before hand.
    prinz wrote: »
    I see good things ahead for you.
    I don't know how you could, you don't know me.


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  • #252
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    prinz wrote: »
    Actually that doesn't guarantee anything either so we're back to square one. It works for some people, it doesn't work for others. The concept that you must 'try before you buy'/or that you'll never know if your compatible or not unless you have sex before marriage is rubbish.

    Oh, please go on. I'm dying to hear the rest of this hypothesis.


  • #253
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    prinz wrote: »
    Actually that doesn't guarantee anything either so we're back to square one.

    I'd be of the opinion that it pretty much does guarantee if you're both into the same kind of thing, and how you both feel about sex.


  • #254
    El Weirdo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,647 ✭✭✭✭El Weirdo


    WTF is going on with all the sex before marriage polls on the first page?


  • #255
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    steve06 wrote: »
    This is hilarious, I'm imagining people going through a sideshow presentation of what they like and don't like....

    So you find sex funny huh? Sad tbh.
    steve06 wrote: »
    You shouldn't have to prepare for marriage, you should be able to walk into it knowing what you're getting involved with from experience of the person.....

    Explains divorce rates alright.
    steve06 wrote: »
    I don't know how you could, you don't know me.

    I'd have doubts about anyone who thinks compromise is a waste of time.


  • #256
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,060 ✭✭✭✭biko


    More merging done


  • #257
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    Oh, please go on. I'm dying to hear the rest of this hypothesis.

    Having sex with someone for 3 years does not guarantee that in year 4 your partner is not going to want something that you're not into.


  • #258
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    prinz wrote: »
    So you find sex funny huh? Sad tbh.
    No, I find your opinions funny.
    prinz wrote: »
    Explains divorce rates alright.
    No it doesn't, people can live together for 10 years, get married and then divorce 5 years later. People change, that's it really.
    prinz wrote: »
    I'd have doubts about anyone who thinks compromise is a waste of time.
    I didn't say waste of time, I said it's settling for less than you want.
    prinz wrote: »
    Having sex with someone for 3 years does not guarantee that in year 4 your partner is not going to want something that you're not into.
    And talking about sex for 3 years doesn't guarantee that when it happens, it's going to be what you expect!


  • #259
    Motley Crue
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,382 ✭✭✭Motley Crue


    I agree with it. Too many marriages end because of a bad sex life, which leads to uncomfortable living conditions, and let's be honest - sex is crucially important in a relationship - if you don't have good, frequent sex (when you both want it) - then it can lead to bigger emotional problems


  • #260
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    steve06 wrote: »
    And talking about sex for 3 years doesn't guarantee that when it happens, it's going to be what you expect!

    Which I never claimed it would do.


  • #261
    Des Carter
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 720 ✭✭✭Des Carter


    Id be more in favour of waiting but there are some points i think needs to be made.

    1. Waiting depends on wheather or not you seperate sex and love. For many they are completely seperate and if thats the case you shouldnt wait ang go ride like minded people. But for me I think they are very much connected and inseperable and as a result waiting is a more realistic option especially with someone who is of the same opinion.

    2.It depends on how you view marriage. For me it would be important for many reasons and I hold it in high regard and view it as the pinnacle of a loving commited relationship. However many dont view it like that and so I would understand why many would just wait until they were in a commited relationship.

    3.The compatability argument is a load of $hit cause if you were both virgins on your wedding night you wouldnt really know if the sex was crappy or not. I know this is a weak argument but also you can work on compatability issues there is a whole internet full of tips to help you improve your lovemaking etc and you would also have some idea of compatability as you would have been messing around before marriage (just not having sex).


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  • #262
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    prinz wrote: »
    Having sex with someone for 3 years does not guarantee that in year 4 your partner is not going to want something that you're not into.

    *facepalm*


  • #263
    Novella
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,713 ✭✭✭✭Novella


    steve06 wrote: »
    She also did say "it would be nice to have one every time".

    The thing about it is that I completely separate sex from love, so to me there's pretty much f#ck all "bonding experience that is sex".

    You can separate sex from love and still see sex as a bonding experience. I have no problem separating sex from love. I don't think I've ever been in love, but I've had sex. Getting naked with someone is a bonding experience whether it's for one hour, one night or a lifetime. If sex was only about an orgasm, why would you not just masturbate? It'd surely be easier.


  • #264
    starlit
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,349 ✭✭✭✭starlit


    well this thread has certainly taken by storm in a day like! keep them coming...with the posts that is! exciting stuff!


  • #265
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    *facepalm*

    Care to expand?


  • #266
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    prinz wrote: »
    Care to expand?
    Not really.

    Although I am wondering what the point is in talking about it at all for as long as possible (to ensure you're REALLY sure you're compatible)? Seeing as it doesn't make a blind bit of difference if 4 years down the line we suddenly may develop some kind of fetish that is not agreeable with our other half? Why even waste the time?


  • #267
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Novella wrote: »
    You can separate sex from love and still see sex as a bonding experience. I have no problem separating sex from love. I don't think I've ever been in love, but I've had sex. Getting naked with someone is a bonding experience whether it's for one hour, one night or a lifetime.
    Fair enough, although I'm sure you'd agree that it's more enjoyable if you do orgasm.
    Novella wrote: »
    If sex was only about an orgasm, why would you not just masturbate? It'd surely be easier.
    You can't really compare the 2 can you? Another body is totally different than a hand.
    prinz wrote: »
    Care to expand?
    Kind of self explanatory really :D


  • #268
    prinz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,598 ✭✭✭✭prinz


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    Although I am wondering what the point is in talking about it at all for as long as possible (to ensure you're REALLY sure you're compatible)? Seeing as it doesn't make a blind bit of difference if 4 years down the line we suddenly may develop some kind of fetish that is not agreeable with our other half? Why even waste the time?

    If it doesn't make a blind bit of difference talking about it versus having sex before marriage and finding out about some fetish or other after marriage why is the point repeatedly made that only by sleeping with someone before marriage can you know if you are compatible? Sleeping with someone does no more to guarantee long term compatibility than discussing sex and sexual interests in depth prior to marriage.

    Which renders the 'try before you buy' argument groundless.


  • #269
    Novella
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,713 ✭✭✭✭Novella


    steve06 wrote: »
    Fair enough, although I'm sure you'd agree that it's more enjoyable if you do orgasm.


    You can't really compare the 2 can you? Another body is totally different than a hand.


    Well what you're saying is that sex is only about an orgasm. You can't guarantee you're gonna have an orgasm every time you have sex. Sometimes it just doesn't work out. So if you only have sex to orgasm, then you're obviously gonna be disappointed sometimes and you would be better off with your hand 'cause you'd never be let down.

    I like the intimacy of sex really, so a lack of orgasm isn't a huge deal to me.


  • #270
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    prinz wrote: »
    If it doesn't make a blind bit of difference talking about it versus having sex before marriage and finding out about some fetish or other after marriage why is the point repeatedly made that only by sleeping with someone before marriage can you know if you are compatible? Sleeping with someone does no more to guarantee long term compatibility than discussing sex and sexual interests in depth prior to marriage.

    Which renders the 'try before you buy' argument groundless.
    Are you high or something? I'm not saying that that is the case, you are!!


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  • #271
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Novella wrote: »
    Well what you're saying is that sex is only about an orgasm.
    Well no, it's about the build up too, and what you do to get to that point to make it better.
    Novella wrote: »
    You can't guarantee you're gonna have an orgasm every time you have sex. Sometimes it just doesn't work out. So if you only have sex to orgasm, then you're obviously gonna be disappointed sometimes and you would be better off with your hand 'cause you'd never be let down.
    Yea but sure you might as well try the sex and hope for the best.
    Novella wrote: »
    I like the intimacy of sex really, so a lack of orgasm isn't a huge deal to me.
    Well that's ok, but you never answered the other question... I'm sure you'd agree that it's more enjoyable if you do orgasm


This discussion has been closed.
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