Annoying Visitors doing Annoying Things.

omahaid · 03-07-2010 11:13PM

callaway92 wrote: »

probably just looking for the Spoons or Cups for his tea no?

No, spoons and everything were out already, he was just nosy.

anewme · 03-07-2010 11:31PM

omahaid wrote: »

The missus tells me that a friend of hers and the friends friend called over. The missus is a hospitable lass so she offered them a cuppa. She has to pop out of the room for a min and when she came back yer man (the friends friend) was rooting through all our drawers :mad:

Knicker sniffers!

skywalker_208 · 04-07-2010 12:25AM

Sam Kade wrote: »

I think you should have went with option 1. Some nerve a visitor telling you what not to do in your house.

+2
this was in your own house.
I would have told them to fu*k right off!

DetectivFoxtrot · 04-07-2010 12:50AM

I have this friend (well my husbands friend) who has no idea about the unwritten rules of visiting. The other nights he arrived, unannounced as usual. We're dug into a programme on TV and fairly irritated by the uninvited presence I have to say. Anyway, in he arrives, so we pause the programme on the Sky+ thingy. We exchange some awkward small talk, alls the while I'm wondering as to the purpose of the visit, giving the OH daggers. The he gets a phone call. The ignorant fecker proceeds to have a loud 20 minute conversation with the caller, in our sitting room, at 8.30pm on a Tuesday night, much of it including "you're breaking up.... I can hear you now,.... you're breaking up again..... the signal here is shoite".
Was it unreasonable for me to expect him to say 'I'll call you back later' to the caller, or 'I'm gonna step out into your hall, need to take this call'? oh nooooo. We had to listen the entire phonecall. And it was the same banal small talk we had just exchanged, I was hearing the shoite twice over!!
Oh yeh and another thing, sort of opposite to the OPs story, the fecker lights up a cigarette and asks for an ashtray! My husband smokes, but we have a strict back garden policy - couldn't believe it!

Neck like a jockey's proverbials I tell ya

To me the rules go:

- No unanounced vistits
- No mid week visits
- No texts to say 'I'm droppin up for a cuppa' (cos that's not an invite)
- Stay for 20 mins max if a quick 'hello, how are ya' means that much to you
-If you interrupt someones dinner because of your unanounced vist feck off quick smart, dinner is NOT nice re-heated. Also, don't put the visitee in the awkward postition of resopnding to you're "Oh... you're eating, sorry" with "Ah no don't worry about it, come in", cos they really don't want you to come in.

Elliemental · 04-07-2010 02:20AM

My father's Welsh aunts used to come and visit us. We'd all sit talking together, but suddenly the aunts would lapse into Welsh and exclude us (they knew we couldn't catch a word of it). It wasn't a major issue, but my ma always suspected that they were talking about us.
Other than that, I guess I have been lucky with visitors.

CrazyRabbit · 04-07-2010 02:22AM

I never invite people over. And when people suggest coming over to my place, I just tell them that my 16 cats and 14 dogs are very aggressive but that are still welcome to visit.

jd007 · 04-07-2010 03:27AM

brummytom wrote: »

Mom hates visitors who won't even offer to help.

callaway92 wrote: »

I'm not sure here now but I'll give a guess that he means his mother.

starbelgrade · 04-07-2010 03:55AM

My parents in law stay with us every couple of months, which I don't mind - they're sound & we usually end up in the pub getting hammered with them. However, one time, when they left the next day, they - well he - left a lovely surprise for us in the guest bathroom.... a huge f*cker of a log.

Now, I don't mean to be disgusting or talk about sh*t for no good reason (there's enough of that already in AH), but this thing was like a big brown anaconda, curled up in the bottom of the bowl. It wouldn't flush. We kept trying - every hour or so, for over two days & it just stayed there, unmoved, like it was laughing at us.

Eventually, I had to give in & break it up with a stick. I was wretching & gagging all the way through, it was that bad.

And there was me, the morning they left, wondering why they had left with such haste, not even stopping to have breakfast with us like they usually do before they head off.

And what do you say? "Oh, cheers for leaving that big turd in my bog - hope I can return the favour next time I eat half a cow"!

christ on a bike! · 04-07-2010 03:58AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

My parents in law stay with us every couple of months, which I don't mind - they're sound & we usually end up in the pub getting hammered with them. However, one time, when they left the next day, they - well he - left a lovely surprise for us in the guest bathroom.... a huge f*cker of a log.

Now, I don't mean to be disgusting or talk about sh*t for no good reason (there's enough of that already in AH), but this thing was like a big brown anaconda, curled up in the bottom of the bowl. It wouldn't flush. We kept trying - every hour or so, for over two days & it just stayed there, unmoved, like it was laughing at us.

Eventually, I had to give in & break it up with a stick. I was wretching & gagging all the way through, it was that bad.

And there was me, the morning they left, wondering why they had left with such haste, not even stopping to have breakfast with us like they usually do before they head off.

And what do you say? "Oh, cheers for leaving that big turd in my bog - hope I can return the favour next time I eat half a cow"!

Next time you go to their house you be the bigger man and don't leave a log in their toilet.

You should however leave one in their cistern.

Elliemental · 04-07-2010 03:58AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

My parents in law stay with us every couple of months, which I don't mind - they're sound & we usually end up in the pub getting hammered with them. However, one time, when they left the next day, they - well he - left a lovely surprise for us in the guest bathroom.... a huge f*cker of a log.

Now, I don't mean to be disgusting or talk about sh*t for no good reason (there's enough of that already in AH), but this thing was like a big brown anaconda, curled up in the bottom of the bowl. It wouldn't flush. We kept trying - every hour or so, for over two days & it just stayed there, unmoved, like it was laughing at us.

Eventually, I had to give in & break it up with a stick. I was wretching & gagging all the way through, it was that bad.

And there was me, the morning they left, wondering why they had left with such haste, not even stopping to have breakfast with us like they usually do before they head off.

And what do you say? "Oh, cheers for leaving that big turd in my bog - hope I can return the favour next time I eat half a cow"!

A revolting story, lovingly rendered. Thanks!

Mc Love · 04-07-2010 06:56AM

Had a party in my house before. Girlfriend got sick so she couldnt come to town with us. One of my mates decided he wasnt going to town and my girlfriend expected he would go home, but he didnt, and she didnt want to be rude so she let him stay there, and he hardly talked at all while helping himself to the beer (the cheap barsteward). The girlfriend had fallen asleep and when she woke up he was still there, and then he just decided to go home.

F**king weirdo or what?! I think he more than outstayed his welcome that time.

The Aussie · 04-07-2010 07:33AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

3. Stab him

Is option 3 a real option in all parts of the country or is it a city thing, you know sort of like a hand shake.

I would have put the cigs away and gone for the big guns, a massive Cuban cigar and blown smoke in his face, then burp and fart till he got the hint, i watch to much Family Guy though...

arybvtcw0eolkf · 04-07-2010 07:52AM

I hate visitors taking a dumb, use the loo for a pe by all means but get rid of the crap before you come over ffs.

Or shoving my dogs away!.. This one really gets my tits wobbling, if you don't like dogs tough sh*t. But don't shove them away when all they want to do is be friendly with you.

ROCKMAN · 04-07-2010 08:10AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

A friend of the missus was over in the house earlier. We were all sitting down, having a cuppa & a chat. I took out my fags & the ashtray & was about to light up, when he said, "You're not going to smoke in here, are you? It's just that I have a very sensitive throat".

I had a few choices;

1. Tell him to f*ck off & light up anyway
2. Ask him to man up or leave
3. Stab him
4. Not smoke
5. Leave the room & smoke in a different room, out of "politeness"

I went for option 5, but I tell ya, the cigarette wasn't the only thing that was fuming.

So, have you ever had any annoying visitors doing annoying things?

Happen me once with a friend of the wife , took option 1 ,which lead to 2 great outcomes

1 Her face was priceless , smug bitch

2 She now only visits when I'm out , result

Ps totally agree with Makikomi don't push my dog away or be committing about my kids , its their fcuking house.

ch750536 · 04-07-2010 09:20AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

My parents in law stay with us every couple of months, which I don't mind - they're sound & we usually end up in the pub getting hammered with them. However, one time, when they left the next day, they - well he - left a lovely surprise for us in the guest bathroom.... a huge f*cker of a log.

Sure it wasn't she?

Lynnsie · 04-07-2010 10:01AM

Samira Ambitious Matchmaking wrote: »

Or shoving my dogs away!.. This one really gets my tits wobbling, if you don't like dogs tough sh*t. But don't shove them away when all they want to do is be friendly with you.

Really hate this, my cousin came to visit and kicked our dog when it sat at her feet under the table. When my sister gave out to her she said animals shouldn't be in the house anyway! If you don't like it, don't visit!

Also hate the turning over the tv thing, I've a friend who constantly does this and if I leave the room at all some crap like The Hills will suddenly appear on the tv.

Aglomerado · 04-07-2010 10:10AM

Years ago at my parents' house we used to suffer visits from a nosey neighbour. We always suspected she would look in the bathroom cabinet every time she went to the loo. So I decided to test this hypothesis.

I put the contents of a bag of marbles into the bathroom cabinet the next time she visited.

When she inevitably went to the loo, a few minutes later there was a terrible clatter as the marbles fell out of the cabinet and pinged all over the sink and floor.

When she came back out we all just looked at her while smirking and said "Was everything OK for you in there, Margaret?"

She never did it again,and she heated our sitting room with her nice warm red face.

:D

Mr Benevolent · 04-07-2010 10:16AM

easyeason3 wrote: »

He he he

I always get a giggle when I hear people say Mom/ Mum/ Mammy.

What do you say? 'Mother dearest?'

orourkeda · 04-07-2010 10:23AM

omahaid wrote: »

The missus tells me that a friend of hers and the friends friend called over. The missus is a hospitable lass so she offered them a cuppa. She has to pop out of the room for a min and when she came back yer man (the friends friend) was rooting through all our drawers :mad:

Rooting through drawers. Presumably you mean drawers the furniture item rather than the underwear. He deserves to be commended if he start pulling someones box after just sitting down in a strangers house.

rednik · 04-07-2010 10:34AM

When they say to me, " sorry I'm not very good at ironing". Well fu*k off outta here so.

bonerm · 04-07-2010 11:45AM

I hate when visitors stand outside my house phoning me, ringing my doorbell and banging on the front door.

You'd think after the 10th attempt they get the message that I'm not letting them in?

PeterIanStaker · 04-07-2010 11:56AM

christ on a bike! wrote: »

Next time you go to their house you be the bigger man and don't leave a log in their toilet.

You should however leave one in their cistern.

Tis known as Top Decking!! :eek::eek:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=top+deck

skywalker_208 · 04-07-2010 03:34PM

Aglomerado wrote: »

Years ago at my parents' house we used to suffer visits from a nosey neighbour. We always suspected she would look in the bathroom cabinet every time she went to the loo. So I decided to test this hypothesis.

I put the contents of a bag of marbles into the bathroom cabinet the next time she visited.

When she inevitably went to the loo, a few minutes later there was a terrible clatter as the marbles fell out of the cabinet and pinged all over the sink and floor.

When she came back out we all just looked at her while smirking and said "Was everything OK for you in there, Margaret?"

She never did it again,and she heated our sitting room with her nice warm red face.

:D

Brilliant!

silverspoon · 04-07-2010 03:52PM

Oh how I hate visitors...particularly non-invited ones, and even moreso when they decide to invite themselves somewhere for an extended period of time. My aunt is in the sorry situation at the moment where her stepdaughter, husband (both in 40's i.e. old enough to know better) and baby have invited themselves to stay for a month and never fcuk off and do their own thing, just sit there waiting for breakfast, lunch and dinner to be served, don't say thanks, that was nice, don't comment at all about any meal she serves them (and she's a chef, and a good one) and basically are just THERE.
And you can bet your ass they won't so much as buy her a bun in thanks!
I get pissed off when uninvited visitors stay longer than one meal. And if someone cooks for you, at least pick up a fcuking cup after! They're not your skivvy!!!

Noreen1 · 04-07-2010 04:07PM

bonerm wrote: »

I hate when visitors stand outside my house phoning me, ringing my doorbell and banging on the front door.

You'd think after the 10th attempt they get the message that I'm not letting them in?

Can I assume that you're a friendly, welcoming, sociable soul, then? :P:D:D

Noreen

nermal15 · 04-07-2010 04:16PM

At the Bluegrass Festival here last summer, a few of my friends asked could they camp in my garden and I said they could, fair enough. Then about ten other friends turned up on the day expecting to be allowed stay. One of them didn't even bother to say hello to me. Plus, I was left with beer cans all over my back garden. Never again...

caseyann · 04-07-2010 06:42PM

omahaid wrote: »

The missus tells me that a friend of hers and the friends friend called over. The missus is a hospitable lass so she offered them a cuppa. She has to pop out of the room for a min and when she came back yer man (the friends friend) was rooting through all our drawers :mad:

caseyann wrote: »

Try this one for size,a girl i used to know came to visit with her son.The son got tired.So been decent allowed her use my room to let him have a nap.She went with him.And through the ceiling i could hear her,no joke rooting through my drawers:mad:
Another day one actually picked up my phone when i got a text to read it:mad:
I have more i'll be back:D

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Annoying Visitors doing Annoying Things.

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