strange things that you've seen happen in pubs

MrStuffins · 02-04-2010 09:10PM

Brynlee Cuddly Panel wrote: »

My second night ever working behind the bar as a barman and I witnessed the biggest fight I have ever seen.

Picture a brawl from a wild west film minus the throwing of bar stools and smashing bottles over peoples heads. Tables went flying, broken glass everywhere. I kid you not when I say about 40-50 people were involved in the fight, it was unbelieveable. The guardai didn't enter the premisis until it had settled down somewhat, and I wouldn't blame them either. Basically it was a 21st in the local and two families didn't get along, they all had friends and the likes with them, it was unreal. We simply could not stop it, I was the only male working there at the time, I was 17 and I wasn't that big at all.

I have a similar story.

Was 17 working behind the bar and a few lads and girls (not regulars) turned up. A couple in their company started fighting and the guy hit the girl. The bouncers kicked him out, the girl said "Get yezzir hands off 'em" and she kicked off. The bouncers lifted her up to throw her out and she kicked a girl right in the eye with her stiletto.

This started mayhem, both sets of friends kicked off, glasses were thrown, the recipients of the glasses got involved....... before ya know it there was at least 100 people involved in an all out brawl.

I was behind the bar and guys tried to jump over the bar to rob the til in the mayhem. One of them tried to glass me and i got a nasty gash on my hand from blocking my face. A couple of girls went around the place taking girl's handbags and bringing them to the toilet to ransack them. This was witnessed by the boyfriend of one of the victims who grabbed this thieving girl and proceeded to beat her like a gigner step-child.

She went limp after a couple of punches but he just picked her up, held her in place with one hand and punched the **** out of her with the other hand!

ibh · 02-04-2010 09:13PM

Went into a pub on Louth / Armagh border once at about 11 in the morning. First off, there was a guy asleep in a chair in the corner. Then later on his mates came in (he had been there from the night before) and they woke him and started drinking again.
This guy started telling them how it was the most comfortable seat he ever sat in etc etc. On of his mates said he was going to steal it when the guy got up to take a pis5.
The guy in the seat got really serious and said he wasn't moving for anything. Later on saw him taking a pis5 into an empty pint glass to avoid losing his seat. Funniest thing was that the barman / owner was just laughing at the antics...

Was in another pub in the same area one night and a young guy from the area had just bought a car. Bit of an old banger, but he was only about 18 at the time. One of the other lads in the pub asked could he take it for a spin (after a load of pints) and the owner said yea. So the guy took off in it and a couple of minutes later crashed through the wall at the front of the pub and into the front door. I don't remember how it was resolved but the guy who crashed it said something along the lines of "the brakes are ****e, you should get them looked at".

hiluxman · 02-04-2010 10:04PM

Was in the pub a bout a year ago and fella came in, ordered a pint of guinness, a handle for a shovel and a tube for a bicycle.

The barman dissapeared for a few min and apears back with the shovel handle and asks yer man is the tube for a 24 or a 26 inch wheel

Where else could ya get service like that at half 11 at night!

A week later the same fella appears, orders a pint of guinness and asks the barman has he got any slab nails. The barman dissapears for about ten minutes and eventualy appears back with a triumphant smile and bag of slab nails. He throws the bag on the counter and yer man says "I only want the one"

SoulTrader · 02-04-2010 10:14PM

InkSlinger67 wrote: »

A few years ago in a club I seen a guy sitting on the bog in a stall with the door wide open, taking a dump while puking into his trousers which were around his ankles at the time. He was so twisted, he got up after the dump, pulled up his trousers and stumbled out without saying a word.

God bless that man! Probably had one or two more before hitting the road that evening! :pac:

You mean he didn't even wipe?:eek:

Stinicker · 02-04-2010 10:23PM

I hate Ireland just that little bit more after reading of these "great" pubs.

hiluxman · 02-04-2010 10:23PM

Last thursday night i was in the same pub, comin to closing time, the barman appears behind the bar wearing a pair of oilskin trousers and a pair of rubber boots, he says to one of the customers to give him a hand for a few minutes,
The pair of them dissapear and are gone for about 20 min. Eventually the customer arrives back and proccedes to wash his hands in the sink behind the bar. The barman does the same. After drying his hand in the same towel he uses for the glasses, he proclaims the birth went straight forward and thats his second belgian blue calf he has pulled today.
Its now half 12 and no chance of gettin any more beer, one of the oul lads shouts up from the back of the bar "give us a pint to wet the head of the newborn"

citizen_p · 02-04-2010 10:28PM

a guy tricked into drinking piss.... he said he couldnt remember the night..... but somone told him after two days of "your a pisshead" "you were a wee bit pissed" "feckin pissant" etc...or when somone said "awh that tastes like piss" and he said ""how the fu&k would you know"

WIZE · 02-04-2010 10:38PM

I worked as a barman at a traveller wedding

Got a €200 tip at the end of the night

/ Thread

billymitchell · 02-04-2010 10:43PM

Pity pubs arent open tonight and we could all be out enjoying other people fighting, ****eing into glasses, drinking pints of piss, watching farmers run animals around the bar etc
Damn you gubberment, DAMN YOU!!!!!

markm17817 · 02-04-2010 10:44PM

:D

bonerm wrote: »

I once saw a Cavan man buy a round.

Mint Sauce · 02-04-2010 11:34PM

jokettle wrote: »

My friends were in a pub in rural Sligo last weekend and the men's toilets was just a single cubicle in the Ladies'

seen similar in a pub in france, the toilet area was like a short hallway/corridor. consisted of a single cubicle, a hand basin, and those swing doors you would see in a bar in a western, which had two urinals behind them. if you were a bloke taking a p!ss all it would take was to lean your head back slightly to have a conversation with who ever was washing their hands, male or female. definatly not a place for a guy with stage fright.

cafecolour · 02-04-2010 11:35PM

I've seen a lot of craziness and stupid drunken behavior from years working in pubs (and tending pub 'tents' at a variety of festivals). But the thing that threw me for the loop the most was relatively quiet but completely surreal.

It was like 5 in the morning, had emptied out the resident bar, cleaning up the place. Went down to do the jacks, everything was fine til I get to our disabled toilet - one of those separate single room ones.

Open the door - two homeless people had basically moved in. They'd unpacked all their **** from bags and everything, were on the floor in sleeping bags, and had made themselves at home - in the middle of the disabled toilet.

Now I'd opened bathroom doors to see feces on the floor, people having sex, and a drunk lad passed out (not all at the same time), but this was so unexpected and complete my brain just shut down for a few moments and I was like "What the f**k is going on? Have entered into bizarro world?"

Bob Z · 03-04-2010 12:51AM

bonerm wrote: »

I once saw a Cavan man buy a round.

Lies

itsallaboutheL · 03-04-2010 01:00AM

Biggins wrote: »

Was in a bar once (Louth) and saw new to the area two lads get offended when their advances were rejected.
Called the woman a slut and other unspeakable terms. Eventually one of the lads went too far and slapped the girl as she walked away.

Well that was that - every local man in the place put down their glasses that was at the bar and tables. The place went dead quite, then one second later all the blokes rushed over and attacked the two assholes.

Biggest mistake of the assholes lives - firstly, the pub was in a small village where they are very protective of their own, secondly, the girl that they slapped was the girlfriend of the MUCH respected (now elected official), decent owner of the bar. The girl whom was much respected herself, worked in the place part time too (it was her night off).

Long story story: there was hospital visits later for two idiots. Frankly, they were lucky to get out the doors alive.

Biggins you have led a marvelously colourful life, some of your experiences are down right incredible, almost. I have to vist some of these places.

On further reflection i have decided you are either

a) Martin McGuinness

or

Kathryn Thomas

CL32 · 03-04-2010 01:11AM

Stinicker wrote: »

I hate Ireland just that little bit more after reading of these "great" pubs.

Well why not relocate to Italy and try to forget all about us?

Bob Z · 03-04-2010 01:12AM

itsallaboutheL wrote: »

Biggins you have led a marvelously colourful life, some of your experiences are down right incredible, almost. I have to vist some of these places.

On further reflection i have decided you are either

a) Martin McGuinness

or

Kathryn Thomas

Whos Kathryn Thomas then

MaybeLogic · 03-04-2010 01:14AM

Bob Z wrote: »

Whos Kathryn Thomas then

She's a traveller.

Duggy747 · 03-04-2010 01:20AM

My local is like what was said in The Matrix: "You have to see it to believe it"

Let's see:

2 men have died in the pub (Natural causes, I promise)
The owner got into a scrap with a drunk where his pint glass was smashed on me and some idiot threw a big, chunk wooden stool hoping it would hit the drunk....................it smacked me in the head instead and fùckin' hurt!
The ladies jacks was once smeared in poo.
Somebody took a shìte in the smoking area.
The giant flatscreen was broken when a cue ball flew off the table and hit it. The replacement tv that was brought down had the exact same thing happen to it only minutes later.
A group of French documentary makers for France's RTÈ equvilent came in and got pissed with us while taping us. Funny chaps though I couldn't understand a word they said.
3 young stereotypical American jocks came in and we played holy fùck with them like telling them to go the bar and order a pint of Ùisce, etc. They were complete assholes, mind you!
Someone was once stabbed in the head with a biro
Extremely violent cat-fights where those sharp heels are deadly weapons
2 oul fellas making out in the jacks while I was caught at the urinals *shudders*
A 20 year old girl came in and was the pinnacle of dyke, she wasn't fat but dressed like a lad with spikey red hair..........she ended up getting in a fight with a lad and beat the living shìte out of him. She also came onto a lot of my female friends.
Some scummers once opened the boot of a Garda car parked outside and stole some uniform jackets
Some unregular lads came, started a fight with my mates and the fight spilled out onto street, stopped traffic for 15 minutes and the scenario wound up in the paper :pac:
Another time an unregular who was a goth glassed my mate, he punched him back, the guy collpased and had a fit. The ambulance came for the 2 of them and it turned out the goth was a nutjob and was pissed while being on a truckload of anti-depressants.

Plenty more, just can't think now! Aaaah, those were the days before it was done up and attracts all the stuck up numpties and cùnts around town now!

MrStuffins · 03-04-2010 01:25AM

itsallaboutheL wrote: »

Biggins you have led a marvelously colourful life, some of your experiences are down right incredible, almost. I have to vist some of these places.

On further reflection i have decided you are either

a) Martin McGuinness

or

Kathryn Thomas

Or perhaps both? Ever seen them in the same room together?

(ps, why would anyone on Boards, obviously knowing how to use the internet, ask "Who is X"? Is it possible that someone has the capacity to register and use Boards.ie but doesn't know how to use Google?)

me-skywalker · 03-04-2010 01:33AM

recylingbin wrote: »

Was in a pub whose name I can't recall (it was upstairs on the quays) and it was pretty jammed. Myself and the ex got drinks and sat down at a table that was already half occupied. Turns out, it was a stag and they had the two tables to our left andthe one to our right as well.
One of them was feeling the effects of a long day boozing and was panned out in his chair. Suddenly a smile appeared on his face. We all looked at his goofy grin and laughed. Then his hand went to his crotch region and he began opening his fly. Before we knew it, he had the lad in his hand and was knocking one out.
The whole place was watching at this stage and the dj, to his eternal credit, stuck on Madonna's 'erotic'.

One of his friends had seen enough and gave him a few slaps on the face to wake him up. Cue boos all round.

Then you woke up crying... No need to tell us why she's an ex...

seanybiker · 03-04-2010 01:42AM

I gave some tool a few smacks a few years ago. Went outside to have a smoke then, was talking to the owner outside and the chap I hit walks out past us and heads off. The owner burst himself laughing because your man was bleeding. The fella I hit got barred then. Kind of strange.

adamski8 · 03-04-2010 01:46AM

My former local on a quiet weekday afternoon (10max in the pub)
A young man walks in and asks for a pint
Barman says "just a minute"
Young man says "I WANT IT NOW" and whips out a pistol and points it at the barman
After receiving his pint im introduced to him by a friend as his friend!
Only after this does the barman get informed it was a replica gun
He got a barring and should have got a lot more

ottostreet · 03-04-2010 01:51AM

JohnMearsheimer wrote: »

Strangest things I've seen were a guy taking a slash up against the bar in full view of everyone and a really really really drunk student wondering around the pub bollock naked except for a pair of socks.

what was he wondering about?

me-skywalker · 03-04-2010 01:56AM

In germany 3years ago we played strip rock, paper, scissors.... messy messy

gonnaplayrugby · 03-04-2010 02:01AM

people shssing during rugby matches. omg wtf. its funny if its like a joke but actually getting annoyed if people are talking. go to the match or watch it at home :rolleyes:

seanybiker · 03-04-2010 02:06AM

gonnaplayrugby wrote: »

people shssing during rugby matches. omg wtf. its funny if its like a joke but actually getting annoyed if people are talking. go to the match or watch it at home :rolleyes:

Wrecks my bulb that does. Talk away, balls to them.

Father Damo · 03-04-2010 02:24AM

In Australian bars Ive often received a free drink on the house, free sausage rolls and pies, and a few other freebies. In one pub we were in the beer garden having bought a caarry out (but drinking a pint bought in the pub). The manager came over, I assumed to check that we wrent drinking carry out on his property as an Irish barman would, but instead offered to put our beeer in the fridge.

Coming from a country where bars wouldnt give ya the steam off their piss the above is very odd indeed.

Bodhisopha · 03-04-2010 02:32AM

I made a witty remark and everybody thanked me.

minidazzler · 03-04-2010 02:35AM

Father Damo wrote: »

In Australian bars Ive often received a free drink on the house, free sausage rolls and pies, and a few other freebies. In one pub we were in the beer garden having bought a caarry out (but drinking a pint bought in the pub). The manager came over, I assumed to check that we wrent drinking carry out on his property as an Irish barman would, but instead offered to put our beeer in the fridge.

Coming from a country where bars wouldnt give ya the steam off their piss the above is very odd indeed.

Irish bar owners would offer the same TBH......then sell it back to ya!

In Lanzarote last year every shot and every second pint was free because me and my brother were the only people using the bar regularily and made good friends with the barman Joseph, a legend of a man TBH. Great times.

epgc3fyqirnbsx · 03-04-2010 02:37AM

Black pudding being served to those in early on a Sunday for the footy.
And very much apppreciate I might add

strange things that you've seen happen in pubs

Comments