"My interest in politics means I'm smarter than you".

Pete Motivator wrote: »

why do you speak like you are speaking about yourself?

Abrasax wrote: »

Is somebody else using your account, OP?

Pighead wrote: »

Pigheads not exactly sure what you're asking here but if you're enquiring as to whether Pighead has ever been lied to and cheated by a girl before then yes, yes he has. Pighead may not know much about the GDP of Belgium but he's got a PHD in the studies of broken hearts.

Pighead wrote: »

Is this how the majority of you lot feel? Pighead sometimes comes into After Hours for some high quality, low brow chat only to be met with full on political discussions that leave him feeling dizzy and confused.

Pighead is probably the smartest person he knows yet he would be the first to admit that his knowledge of politics is about as extensive as Charlie from Busted' knowledge of The Complete Works of Charles Dickens.

Whilst in conversation last week with a lady, Pighead swiftly realised that she was of the rare breed known as Femalicus Intelligus. She had just been talking about her forthcoming trip to South America and it was patently clear that if Pighead wanted to impress, that he'd have to use more than just his dashing good looks on this occasion.

"Hey ya babes, one thing Pighead would advise whilst over in South America would be thus: Be very very careful whilst going for the wee wees especially if you're swimming in the Amazon. There's an ugly bugger of a fish called a Candiru and the perv is attracted by the smell of human wee wee and it can insert it self into the penis or vagina whilst you're urinating.

Then the cheeky rascal lodges itself somewhere in the urinary tract with its spines and it uses its mouth for feeding by sucking the blood. It is almost impossible for fish to survive inside of the human body. Removal of the fish is extremely hard due to the spines and if problem is not treated it can result in removal of the genitals."

Pighead could tell she was impressed. This was no run of the mill flat toned Dundalk lad she was dealing with. Her wide opened mouth screamed out "Take me now Pighead" but then out of nowhere some eejit rains on Pighead's parade by smarmily sliding his way into our two way conversation and turning it onto a three wayer. The battle had begun. Then the slimebag hits Pighead with a sucker punch.

Slimebag:"So Pighead, do you think the government are doing enough to guide us through these harsh economic storms?"

Pighead: In Bertie we trust. If anybody can save us, Bertie can.

Slimebag: Eh Berties gone. It's Brian Cowen at the helm now.

Pighead: Shut up Slimebag

The chick had seen enough. She asks slimebag if he wants to go back to her place and the look she throws towards Pighead screams "I definitely would have had mind blowing sexual intercourse with you but your lack of political knowledge is such a turn off."

So is the general opinion amongst you politics lovers? Are us non politic lovers seen as some sort of lower class citizen? The annoying fly that circles around your head? The shit on the bottom of your shoe? If so well then Pighead respectfully requests that these attitudes really have to change. Who says that you are better than Pighead just because you know the name of the leader of the opposition?

Pighead realises that not all political aficionados are snobby and standofffish towards non politic people but even if this thread makes one of you lot have a think about how you treat people like us well then something will have been achieved here today.

This has been a party non political broadcast on behalf of the Pighead Party.