What Would You Do? If you Caught A Burglar in Your Home

Tail Wagger · 27-03-2010 11:22PM #1

Well I'm sure we've all thought about it from time to time, but if it this really happened to you.

If you arrived home some day to your home and found someone [a burglar] ransacking your belongings?...

[1] Would you.... give him a 5 minute start before ringing the cops?

[2] Would you.....Make a cup of tea, and sit down and talk it over?

[3] would you.....Take out your photo's and show him where next to rob?

[4] would you..... Do none of the above and sort it yourself?

nucking futs · 27-03-2010 11:24PM

If he had a weapon, let him at it. If not, fight back.

Tigger · 27-03-2010 11:24PM

7
a few times

Mr. Presentable · 27-03-2010 11:25PM

I'd hit him over the head with the microwave and shove every single item in his swag bag up his arse. Then i'd rub him in sausagemeat and throw him over the wall to next-door's dog.

Mr. Presentable · 27-03-2010 11:26PM

Tail Wagger wrote: »

Well I'm sure we've all thought about it from time to time, but if it this really happened to you.

If you arrived home some day to your home and found someone [a burglar] ransacking your belongings?...

[1] Would you.... give him a 5 minute start before ringing toe cops?

[2] Would you.....Make a cup of tea, and sit down and talk it over?

[3] would you.....Take out your photo's and show him where next to rob?

[4] would you..... Do none of the above and sort it yourself?

Incidentally, who the f*** are the toe cops? Ya quick editing fecker

amacachi · 27-03-2010 11:28PM

I'd make sure I only hit him on his front, then it can all be explained as self-defence.

The more likely scenario is I would **** meself.

Mint Sauce · 27-03-2010 11:28PM

make sure he didn't get my passport

nipplenuts wrote: »

Incidentally, who the f*** are the toe cops? Ya quick editing fecker

they make sure you have clipped your toe nails properly

fonecrusher1 · 27-03-2010 11:29PM

If he had a weapon i wouldn't confront him. If he didn't have a weapon i'd do my best to cause as much bodily harm to him before he was able to get away from me.

Tail Wagger · 27-03-2010 11:29PM

nipplenuts wrote: »

Incidentally, who the f*** are the toe cops? Ya quick editing fecker

Just found me glasses, very hard to drink looking through the end of a pint glass
and type as well !

ibarelycare · 27-03-2010 11:31PM

nipplenuts wrote: »

I'd hit him over the head with the microwave and shove every single item in his swag bag up his arse. Then i'd rub him in sausagemeat and throw him over the wall to next-door's dog.

:D:D:D

Tail Wagger · 27-03-2010 11:37PM

Well if it was me I'd lock him in the back bedroom with the fecken mother-in-law, I know she wouldn't let him out because she hasn't been with any man for about fifteen years. The next morning he'd go to the cop shop and throw himself at their mercy.....

Locust · 27-03-2010 11:41PM

I'd initially try and properly apprehend him - i.e. give him a few thumps and tie him up all 'hostel' like and ring the guards...
While waiting for them I'd check him for any identification or property on him that might give me clues as to where he's from etc... and give him a wee pep talk on what happens to his gaff or his knees and his families if he decides to come back here.

If the inital confrontation goes pear shaped i'd be thinking of self defense, do what i have to to 'neutralise him' weapon or not, plenty of objects in my house to defend myself with - in my mind all id think - its me or him - no problem making that decision.

jill_valentine · 27-03-2010 11:42PM

I have caught a burglar in my house.

The lights were out in the front rooms, so he must have thought there was nobody home. He kicked the door in, whereupon I vocalised my considerable outrage with a number of angry, colourful profanities and chased him back out.

I was too angry to think about what I might have done if he didn't run when I chased him, but thankfully the problem didn't arise.

changes · 27-03-2010 11:45PM

If i thought it was one burglar i'd attack him with one of the golf clubs i have in the room. If it was 2 i think i'd be hiding till they left.

Rockn · 27-03-2010 11:51PM

Step 1: Grab a weapon.

Step 2: Shout at him/ let him know I'm there. If he runs off relax and report to the Gards. If he doesn't run off proceed to step 3. If he runs off but is carrying my TV run after him and proceed to step 3.

Step 3: Kick the **** out of him.

squod · 28-03-2010 12:01AM

changes wrote: »

If i thought it was one burglar i'd attack him with one of the golf clubs i have in the room. If it was 2 i think i'd be hiding till they left.

Angry golfer, real scary. :rolleyes:

Mike 1972 · 28-03-2010 12:06AM

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

If he had a weapon i wouldn't confront him. If he didn't have a weapon i'd do my best to cause as much bodily harm to him before he was able to get away from me.

If youre going down that route its best to cause him so much body harm as to not be able to get away from you.

And then figure out how to get rid of the corpse without anyone finding out

Fiskar · 28-03-2010 12:09AM

Don't think he/she/they would want their picture/video all over the internet! CCTV deterrent along with other deterrants would negate to you ever having to face this issue/problem.
If it ever arose with these deterrants you would most probably be out away from the home.

stovelid · 28-03-2010 12:10AM

I don't know but it would be far, far worse than all the spoofs physical punishments outlined thus far.

Mr. Presentable · 28-03-2010 12:14AM

stovelid wrote: »

I don't know but it would be far, far worse than all the spoofs physical punishments outlined thus far.

OK, you got me

OutlawPete · 28-03-2010 12:14AM

Caught a burglar getting in the window one night.

It was about 3am and he threw his feet in through the top opening of the window, down inside the blinds and was standing on the window ledge.

I just jumped up scared out of my boxers and roared at him.

He dived back out and I grabbed his feet and pushed them out.

I then (foolishly) opened the door and was roaring all sorts.

Calling them scumbag junkies and that I knew them etc.

I hadn't a clue but it just sorta of happened like that.

Where I am is very rough.

The committee are always putting leaflets though the door about meetings in the hall about the amount of local burglaries and car thefts and what we can do etc.

orourkeda · 28-03-2010 12:15AM

Any burglar would have to murder me before they'd get put of my home with a red cent.

Anyone who is prepared to let anyone just take their stuff needs their head examined in my view

fonecrusher1 · 28-03-2010 12:15AM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

If youre going down that route its best to cause him so much body harm as to not be able to get away from you.

And then figure out how to get rid of the corpse without anyone finding out

Nah, I wouldn't go that far. But i'd make sure he went back home with a few missing teeth or something to remind him why its a bad idea to break into peoples homes.
I couldn't kill a person because they broke into my house but theres nothing wrong with giving him a good kicking. Like a souvenir.:D

BluesBerry · 28-03-2010 12:16AM

make my self a flame thrower with a can of hairspray and a lighter

give him 1st degree burns

that'll teach him for tresspassing on my property:cool:

Tigger · 28-03-2010 12:16AM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

If youre going down that route its best to cause him so much body harm as to not be able to get away from you.

And then figure out how to get rid of the corpse without anyone finding out

Septic tank?

changes · 28-03-2010 12:19AM

squod wrote: »

Angry golfer, real scary. :rolleyes:

I'm a good golfer i could take the tip of your nose off in half a second

Jokes aside, i'm 32 and fairly fit. There would be no messing about the golf club would be swung and swung hard....

A Disgrace · 28-03-2010 12:20AM

OutlawPete wrote: »

Caught a burglar getting in the window one night.

It was about 3am and he threw his feet in through the top opening of the window, down inside the blinds and was standing on the window ledge.

I just jumped up scared out of my boxers and roared at him.

He dived back out and I grabbed his feet and pushed them out.

I then (foolishly) opened the door and was roaring all sorts.

Calling them scumbag junkies and that I knew them etc.

I hadn't a clue but it just sorta of happened like that.

Where I am is very rough.

The committee are always putting leaflets though the door about meetings in the hall about the amount of local burglaries and car thefts and what we can do etc.

It's amazing how animal instinct takes over.. I woke one night about 5 years ago to a guy standing over my bed, I was up and at him before I even knew what I was doing... I guess you could say I spoke to him.. with my fists.

Still, a frightening experience and it still sorta haunts me to this day

galwayrush · 28-03-2010 12:20AM

I have no idea, because at this stage, i'll probably recognise him / her. If it was my bank manager,i'd definitely shoot the thieving bastard,

Fiskar · 28-03-2010 12:22AM

OutlawPete wrote: »

Caught a burglar getting in the window one night.

It was about 3am and he threw his feet in through the top opening of the window, down inside the blinds and was standing on the window ledge.

I just jumped up scared out of my boxers and roared at him.

He dived back out and I grabbed his feet and pushed them out.

I then (foolishly) opened the door and was roaring all sorts.

Calling them scumbag junkies and that I knew them etc.

I hadn't a clue but it just sorta of happened like that.

Where I am is very rough.

The committee are always putting leaflets though the door about meetings in the hall about the amount of local burglaries and car thefts and what we can do etc.

"Escape from LA/New York" comes to mind,

have to say that each persons area and experiences determine their reaction to certain situations. If this were the norm in my area I'd be gone to greener pastures (life is too short).
I'd cap it off with this, the "fight or flight" of the moment and ones presence of mind to think appropriately in these situations, Flight and fight another day would be the safest policy. :rolleyes:

ScumLord · 28-03-2010 12:24AM

I'd capture them and they'd be my friend forever and ever.

PCPhoto · 28-03-2010 12:30AM

for fear of the legal consequences in the event of this happening ..... I'm not gonna say what I think I would do....or at least what I would like to do if I found myself in this situation.

What Would You Do? If you Caught A Burglar in Your Home

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