Man ripped off boyfriends balls...

davyjose · 07-01-2010 03:48PM

tl;dr

He was trying to get your man horny, but he made a balls of it.....

07-01-2010 03:49PM

Kiera wrote: »

Is it really that easy to twist them off?

/looks for someone to try this out on.....

:eek:

*backs slowly out the door*

helimachoptor wrote: »

Pm me

So thats where you got your name....

Poor Uncle Tom · 07-01-2010 03:52PM

Kiera wrote: »

Is it really that easy to twist them off?.....

How do you think we wash them..?

Mrmoe · 07-01-2010 03:52PM

Why did he not wake up? I can't imagine someone doing that to my balls and still be asleep.

Kiera · 07-01-2010 03:55PM

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

How do you think we wash them..?

Tea bagging?

snubbleste · 07-01-2010 03:56PM

I like the other story in the paper

Policeman caught having sex in a church!
A lay official crept into the place of worship with his lover early on New Year’s Day. They then proceeded to have loud sex – during the rosary before the early service! Their moans could be heard in the last pew. A parochial insider said: “When a churchgoer went up to check it out, she caught the pair red-handed. The woman was completely distraught.”
Although the cop – who was off duty – and his partner ran off straight away, an employee of the parochial office recognised the man.

Poor Uncle Tom · 07-01-2010 04:00PM

Kiera wrote: »

Tea bagging?

Naw, that's just a myth.....
we leave them soak overnight with the false teeth..

robtri · 07-01-2010 04:07PM

was his weight before or after he lost his balls??

Poor Uncle Tom · 07-01-2010 04:09PM

He was a couple of stones heavier first.......

Kiera · 07-01-2010 04:09PM

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

Naw, that's just a myth.....
we leave them soak overnight with the false teeth..

So if one gets mixed up with the other you could actually tea bag yourself?

Splinter · 07-01-2010 04:09PM

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

Naw, that's just a myth.....
we leave them soak overnight with the false teeth..

thats where the old phrase comes from, ya get up early,half asleep and put the wrong ones in the wrong place...hench the term "cheeky bollix"....

(may or may not be true)

Poor Uncle Tom · 07-01-2010 04:20PM

Kiera wrote: »

So if one gets mixed up with the other you could actually tea bag yourself?

Hardly......no strings attached..;)

orourkeda · 07-01-2010 04:34PM

I'm using this story as a chat up line or a proposition.

Excuse me love do you mind if I get you so drunk that you'll pass out but you better get aroused or else i'm going to rip your box out and throw it out the window.

dylano_k · 07-01-2010 05:03PM

Heorr Alexandooorrrr, ya no the Siegessaule monument?, yeh, well hang yore bol....oh wait

Proto · 07-01-2010 05:15PM

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

well after this can you really say you're ok with gays?

Yeah because there's no such thing as a straight sexual abuser :rolleyes:

Fobia · 07-01-2010 05:35PM

john47832 wrote: »

actualy this is an important point and its good to see the Germans are again up to scratch again with the details

if you try to rip a pair from a 9 stone man what do you think would happen? he would come with them surely, the separation of skin and scrotum would not occur - now a 20 stone man, he aint gonna budge an inch

...only it's the man accused that's 120kg, not the victim. Can no-one read?!

Wompa1 · 07-01-2010 06:01PM

Kiera wrote: »

Is it really that easy to twist them off?

/looks for someone to try this out on.....

If your not very strong then have at it dear!

K4t · 07-01-2010 06:26PM

I had a girl do something similar to me recently. I was unresponsive to her attempts at arousing me and she got pretty agitated. It took all my powers of imagiantion and recollection of Jessica Alba to prevent a very akward situation. I must mention I was too drunk to protect myself and she was physically stronger than me. Eventually she got the picture.

This is actually a true story:eek:

Poor guy. I hope he can have them re-attached...

seanbmc · 07-01-2010 06:38PM

Dancor wrote: »

Did any other guys close their legs while reading that?

Funny you mention that yeah,quite fast haha.
Man that sounds horrible whats the guy supposed to do now?

dr.bollocko · 07-01-2010 06:43PM

He used to be Hans Bollocko.
Now he's just Hans O.
Poor bastard.

davyjose · 07-01-2010 06:45PM

dr.bollocko wrote: »

He used to be Hans Bollocko.
Now he's just Hans O.
Poor bastard.

he could be Bollock0

friendface · 07-01-2010 06:46PM

What a ripoff!

Stark · 07-01-2010 06:51PM

Dancor wrote: »

Did any other guys close their legs while reading that?

Crossed them twice just to be sure.

jd007 · 07-01-2010 06:54PM

I feel sick after reading that!:(

OutlawPete · 07-01-2010 08:06PM

Well, one thing is for sure.

If they make a remake of Scarface, he ain't getting the part.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmYivCoJAHw

FX Meister · 07-01-2010 08:09PM

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

well after this can you really say you're ok with gays?

Yeah, I can.

SantryRed · 07-01-2010 08:15PM

orourkeda wrote: »

I'm using this story as a chat up line or a proposition.

Excuse me love do you mind if I get you so drunk that you'll pass out but you better get aroused or else i'm going to rip your box out and throw it out the window.

That just isn't funny at all.

Kimbot · 07-01-2010 08:17PM

Kiera wrote: »

Is it really that easy to twist them off?

/looks for someone to try this out on.....

I hear its easier to twist while in the mouth more so than the hand.

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

Naw, that's just a myth.....
we leave them soak overnight with the false teeth..

Ah sure they even provide devices on golf courses for washing our balls. :P

spinandscribble · 07-01-2010 08:29PM

i'm a woman and even i crossed my legs.

Caco · 07-01-2010 08:35PM

Where does it say in the article that it was his boyfriend, it only calls them buddys?

Man ripped off boyfriends balls...

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