Best revenge stories

Numina · 27-11-2009 10:23PM

rarnes1 wrote: »

I know a lad who was on holidays in the canarys and had a disagreement with the fella staying in the appartment beside him and his missus on the first night. It was over a comment the guy had made to my mates girlfriend. They subsequently made up as yer man said he was sorry or something.

Anyway, my mate is a bad cúnt and the afternoon he was going home he used the other couples bathroom and while he was in there put their toothbrushes up his arse and took photos of it with their camera !

That never happened.

http://www.snopes.com/racial/crime/toothbrush.asp

stovelid · 27-11-2009 10:29PM

I was set up and sacked by two people in my company as part of a social experiment conducted for their own amusement so I bankrupted them by tricking them into putting all their savings into orange juice futures. One of the bastards actually still has the cheek to be still posting in this thread after what he did to me.

El Siglo · 27-11-2009 10:39PM

stovelid wrote: »

I was set up and sacked by two people in my company as part of a social experiment conducted for their own amusement so I bankrupted them by tricking them into putting all their savings into orange juice futures. One of the bastards actually still has the cheek to be still posting in this thread after what he did to me.

Sounds familiar...

stovelid · 27-11-2009 11:04PM

El Siglo wrote: »

Sounds familiar...

Well that's me busted.

cock robin · 27-11-2009 11:38PM

Knew a dude way back who ended up in a flat in Drumcondra with 2 wimmin. When he was inside they offered him a drink and the next thing he remembers is waking up in the Mater hosp. They had spiked his drink and left him in the street. However while he slept they shaved him from head to toe. Not a blade of hair did they leave on his body and Im talking 20 odd years ago. In the days before mach3 turbos and lubricants. His body was covered in shaving cuts. That part of the story I can vouch for the revenge part is second hand info. He told me that he found out where this chick actually lived andbroke into her house. He turned the oven on high took a gigantic sh1te and put it in the oven to bake and then left. I hope he actually did do this cause I seen him the day he was released from hosp and he was in agony.

Bajingo · 27-11-2009 11:51PM

cock robin wrote: »

Knew a dude way back who ended up in a flat in Drumcondra with 2 wimmin. When he was inside they offered him a drink and the next thing he remembers is waking up in the Mater hosp. They had spiked his drink and left him in the street. However while he slept they shaved him from head to toe. Not a blade of hair did they leave on his body and Im talking 20 odd years ago. In the days before mach3 turbos and lubricants. His body was covered in shaving cuts. That part of the story I can vouch for the revenge part is second hand info. He told me that he found out where this chick actually lived andbroke into her house. He turned the oven on high took a gigantic sh1te and put it in the oven to bake and then left. I hope he actually did do this cause I seen him the day he was released from hosp and he was in agony.

Fair balls to him for breaking in and ****ting in their oven..but it doesnt sound like he got even with them I mean they put him in hospital and all he did was poo in their oven!

Trekker09 · 28-11-2009 12:04AM

I am actually planning a revenge for the fcuker who got me made redundant last week. I'll post the results in a few weeks, but beleive me, it'll be worth waiting for

minidazzler · 28-11-2009 12:04AM

Bajingo wrote: »

Fair balls to him for breaking in and ****ting in their oven..but it doesnt sound like he got even with them I mean they put him in hospital and all he did was poo in their oven!

Do you know how long hot oven poo smell would stick around???

A LONG time!

Midnight_EG · 28-11-2009 12:18AM

minidazzler wrote: »

Do you know how long hot oven poo smell would stick around???

A LONG time!

Tell your mam you're making shepherds pie and try it :pac:

Bajingo · 28-11-2009 12:44AM

minidazzler wrote: »

Do you know how long hot oven poo smell would stick around???

A LONG time!

No not really to be honest..but they cut him up and put him in hospital..im more impressed that he went ahead with the break in!

RMD · 28-11-2009 12:55AM

When I was 16 and in the Gaeltacht I was pretty much in with this stunning looking girl there until this guy from cork who I hated from the start decided to **** things up for me as I was the one "leading the race for her".

After 2 weeks of not touching myself, I released an unholy amount of semen into his Brylcream which he then plastered himself (as most country folk seem to do) in for the last night disco. Got the girl in the end and his hair was covered in cum, success for me.

Bizzi Lizzy · 28-11-2009 01:02AM

cock robin wrote: »

Knew a dude way back who ended up in a flat in Drumcondra with 2 wimmin. When he was inside they offered him a drink and the next thing he remembers is waking up in the Mater hosp. They had spiked his drink and left him in the street. However while he slept they shaved him from head to toe. Not a blade of hair did they leave on his body and Im talking 20 odd years ago. In the days before mach3 turbos and lubricants. His body was covered in shaving cuts. That part of the story I can vouch for the revenge part is second hand info. He told me that he found out where this chick actually lived andbroke into her house. He turned the oven on high took a gigantic sh1te and put it in the oven to bake and then left. I hope he actually did do this cause I seen him the day he was released from hosp and he was in agony.

Does anyone in this story go by the name "Paul" ????

artanevilla · 28-11-2009 01:04AM

Bizzi Lizzy wrote: »

Does anyone in this story go by the name "Paul" ????

Yeah, one of the wimmin.

minidazzler · 28-11-2009 01:06AM

RMD wrote: »

When I was 16 and in the Gaeltacht I was pretty much in with this stunning looking girl there until this guy from cork who I hated from the start decided to **** things up for me as I was the one "leading the race for her".

After 2 weeks of not touching myself, I released an unholy amount of semen into his Brylcream which he then plastered himself (as most country folk seem to do) in for the last night disco. Got the girl in the end and his hair was covered in cum, success for me.

Cape Clear???

What year????

You bastard!! If that was you!! :mad:

RMD · 28-11-2009 01:17AM

minidazzler wrote: »

Cape Clear???

What year????

You bastard!! If that was you!! :mad:

Uisce, it's an age old gaeltacht trick, the ol' cum in the Bryclream.

Trekker09 · 28-11-2009 01:20AM

RMD wrote: »

When I was 16 and in the Gaeltacht I was pretty much in with this stunning looking girl there until this guy from cork who I hated from the start decided to **** things up for me as I was the one "leading the race for her".

After 2 weeks of not touching myself, I released an unholy amount of semen into his Brylcream which he then plastered himself (as most country folk seem to do) in for the last night disco. Got the girl in the end and his hair was covered in cum, success for me.

Her name wasn't Mary by any chance was it?

marko91 · 28-11-2009 01:24AM

allanb49 wrote: »

guy once sold me his pubes, so i killed his parents ground them up and fed them to him

hahaha thats from southpark it was on tonight

Borneo Fnctn · 28-11-2009 01:31AM

A good mate of mine got a bit out of line in the school yard one day. He soaked another friend with a bottle of water. It was unprovoked and really out of character. The victim was absolutely seething. I helped him plan revenge. We agreed we would wait until it was long forgotten about.

A few weeks later we went to easons and bought a big fuck-off tub of glitter. So the guy goes off to the canteen to get a bar or something and leaves his school bag behind him. We take his bag and dump every speck of glitter into his bag. We took our time and spilled it between the pages of his books, in his pencil case and all over his jumper. The funny thing about glitter is that it gets everywhere and is near impossible to get rid of. He was walking around with glitter on his hands, face and in his hair for the rest of the day. His bag and his books had sparkly bits on them for the rest of the year.

Trekker09 · 28-11-2009 01:37AM

His name wasn't Gary was it?

Numina · 28-11-2009 01:48AM

marko91 wrote: »

hahaha thats from southpark it was on tonight

We desperately need a thumbs down function.

RandolphEsq · 28-11-2009 06:28AM

stovelid wrote: »

Somebody threw a bottle out of window at me in near Summerhill (Dublin) once (saw the window being pulled down) so I waited a while and went back and put a brick through the window.

lol bit harsh? Why not throw bouquets through the window and think of smiling dolphins at the same time? Stovelid man, you got issues! Angry issues! Want to talk them through?
EDIT: not with me because I can't help, but just relax.

cock robin · 28-11-2009 12:21PM

Bizzi Lizzy wrote: »

Does anyone in this story go by the name "Paul" ????

Now Bizzi Lizzy that would be telling

Kipperhell · 28-11-2009 01:53PM

Trekker09 wrote: »

I am actually planning a revenge for the fcuker who got me made redundant last week. I'll post the results in a few weeks, but beleive me, it'll be worth waiting for

I very much doubt anybody did that to you in any personal way due to the laws in place. This sounds like psycho talk.

Run_to_da_hills · 28-11-2009 02:49PM

During the World Cup in 1994 a guy was barred from Mc Donaghs pub in Dalkey for making a fool of himself in the lounge during the match. As he was being escorted to the door the crowd jeered at him.

On the laneway at the side of the pub there was a large inake fan, the guy took out his flute and pi**ed straight into the fan soaking everyone inside. He was well gone by the time the crowd got out after him

thermo66 · 28-11-2009 03:09PM

rarnes1 wrote: »

I know a lad who was on holidays in the canarys and had a disagreement with the fella staying in the appartment beside him and his missus on the first night. It was over a comment the guy had made to my mates girlfriend. They subsequently made up as yer man said he was sorry or something.

Anyway, my mate is a bad cúnt and the afternoon he was going home he used the other couples bathroom and while he was in there put their toothbrushes up his arse and took photos of it with their camera !

Thats fking disgusting. Id never go that far but i did get p!ssed off at a housemate who id loaned earrings to, came back the next morning while i was still in bed half asleep and said 'oh thanx for the earrings, ill just leave them here on your dresser'. That was grand i never thought of them til later that night when i went to put them in jewellary box and just one earring was on the dresser. I looked all around and no sign so went and asked her did she still have the other. All innocent puppy eyes at me ' No i DEFINITELY put them both back'. So it magically disappeared in about 6 hours when nobody but me was in the room. It wouldn't have even bothered me that much but there was no apology or offer to help me look, just a 'whatever' attitude.

Turned out she liked my earrings as she went and bought a similar style the next day. Couple of weeks later she went out and left her door open

:D:D. Next time she wanted those earrings she came down in a fit saying 'did you see my earrings??' Barely glanced at her 'No' . HAHA she was majorly p!ssed off but thats what she gets for being a liar.

Petty yes but i proved my point and got revenge. Felt good!!!

El Siglo · 28-11-2009 03:19PM

Bajingo wrote: »

Fair balls to him for breaking in and ****ting in their oven..but it doesnt sound like he got even with them I mean they put him in hospital and all he did was poo in their oven!

Oh I know a way to get even with people like that...

3DataModem · 28-11-2009 03:19PM

Short one:

Guy punches me in chipper in 1993.

Same guy interviews with me for job in 1997.

Ha ha no job for you.

Dardania · 28-11-2009 05:05PM

3DataModem wrote: »

Short one:

Guy punches me in chipper in 1993.

Same guy interviews with me for job in 1997.

Ha ha no job for you.

Hope ya reminded him!

LD 50 · 28-11-2009 07:37PM

Found this one on Tucker Max.com Maybe NSFW

I am moving to NYC in December, so I decided to spend early November in the area looking for an apartment. It is about a 13 hour drive from Chicago to NYC, and since there were some cute girls from Pittsburgh that had been emailing me, I decided to stop and hook up with a few of them.

There was one girl in particular that I wanted to hang out with, "Jess." She'd sent pretty good pics, wrote intelligent emails, made it very clear she wanted to **** the **** out of me, and was a big drinker, but it was something else that really clinched it. A week or so earlier she posted this on my message board under a thread about road head:

"One of my very best friends, a guy I dated for about 4 hours in high school, found out his girlfriend was cheating on him, with a 17 year old baby daddy named Daeqwon. I cannot explain in writing how livid we both were to learn this. I also cannot explain in writing how vengeful and twisted he and I both are.

Instead of immediately dumping her and letting me tear her to pieces, he took her out on a huge date. Kind of like Tucker's buttsex story - he buttered this bitch up. Dropped $250 on dinner and took her to the ****ing ballet. All because he knew that a little romance and a little Dom would get her to open wide and give him a slobjob on the ride home. And slob she did - he later said it was some of the best head of his life.

His life; not hers.

Before their date (immediately before) I ran over to his apartment really quickly - and let him **** me. In the butt. Seriously, we are strictly friends, totally platonic. He didn't come. Just a few in-and-outs to make sure his wang was nice and tasty. After he put it in my ass for a few minutes, he very carefully stuck his dick back in his boxers, saying he didn't want to let anything rub off.

Two hours later he let his raging whore of a (now ex-) girlfriend suck on his penis for about 20 minutes. He claims at one point, she almost stopped, because he was laughing so hard he swerved off the road.

See you in hell."

Crann na Beatha · 28-11-2009 07:51PM

This post has been deleted.

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