Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Do you read your other half's text messages?

Options
  • 06-11-2009 4:32pm
    #1
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭


    I had an discussion with my cousin about it yesterday. She said that it's normal for girls to read men's text messages as they could be secretly up to no good and it's the only way to find out. I said that it's a breach of privacy, that the ends don't justify the means and every relationship shouldn't be built on a foundation of inherent distrust. She told me that I'll change my mind once I have a girlfriend.

    I still disagree with her. I think that if you really think you have the right to look through somebody's text messages just because you're going out with them, then you're insane. That is to say, I have no issue if somebody let's his/her girl/boyfriend read through their texts, obviously. But the assumption that it's normal behaviour? Ludicrous.

    What do you think? Try to keep the "yore ma's" and shit out of this please.
    Tagged:


«13

Comments

  • Options
    #2
    Mr. Incognito
    Registered Users Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    If I caught her- Instant perma ban


  • Options
    #3
    Valmont
    Registered Users Posts: 5,856 ✭✭✭Valmont


    I would never dream of it. Mainly because I don't really care as it's only a ****ing text message after all.


  • Options
    #4
    dr.bollocko
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,943 Mod ✭✭✭✭dr.bollocko


    The whole thing just makes me feel uncomfortable tbh. I just like my privacy. Bitch.


  • Options
    #5
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    Nova Vast Jaw wrote: »
    I had an discussion with my cousin about it yesterday. She said that it's normal for girls to read men's text messages as they could be secretly up to no good and it's the only way to find out.

    If don't like your cousin reading your texts, you should put a password on your phone.


  • Options
    #6
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    I'm single but with my previous g/f I would never read her text messages unless something big happened and I had a good reason to.

    Think I might have checked hers twice and info from reading them on the second occasion was the reason for our break-up.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #7
    Ahsurelookit
    Closed Accounts Posts: 26 ✭Ahsurelookit


    Was she serious??? Thats madness, if the texts were meant for her to see the sender would have sent them to her!!!

    I went to college with a girl who thought nothing of just picking up peoples phone off the table and reading the texts, put her in her place quick fast. Seriously I would never read anyone's texts its such an invasion of privacy.


  • Options
    #8
    Aodan83
    Registered Users Posts: 1,110 ✭✭✭Aodan83


    Taking a look while the OH is out of the room seems a bit wierd. It's like your expecting to find something that shouldn't be there. That's not how it should work. If they let you loook through, then ya, whatever floats your boat like. But sneaking a peek just shows that there is no trust there.


  • Options
    #9
    Nasty_Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 1,327 ✭✭✭Nasty_Girl


    I dont give a sh*t if my husband reads my texts.
    Half of them are bullsh*t and he knows it.
    I've got nothing to hide.


  • Options
    #10
    RossFixxxed
    Registered Users Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭RossFixxxed


    Nasty_Girl wrote: »
    I dont give a sh*t if my husband reads my texts.
    Half of them are bullsh*t and he knows it.
    I've got nothing to hide.

    I like the sound of the other half.

    Maybe it's cos I'm an only child or something but I'm obsessive about my privacy. There's bugger all of interest on my phone, email, post etc. but it's MINE and I like it that way.


  • Options
    #11
    Cathmandooo
    Registered Users Posts: 17,324 ✭✭✭✭Cathmandooo


    No I wouldn't read anyone's text messages and wouldn't appreciate anyone reading mine. There's nothing in them and I've nothing to hide but it's an invasion of privacy to do it. You shuldn't have to put a password on your phone to prevent it happening. There's something wrong if you do.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #12
    pikachucheeks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    My thinking is, if you don't trust the person enough to respect their privacy (ie. not look through their phone etc), you shouldn't be in a relationship with them.


  • Options
    #13
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    WindSock wrote: »
    If don't like your cousin reading your texts, you should put a password on your phone.

    I'm...I'm not going out with my cousin, WindSock.


  • Options
    #14
    token56
    Registered Users Posts: 2,603 ✭✭✭token56


    Text, emails, etc its the same for all, you dont invade someone else's privacy by checking their stuff. Trust is a huge part of any relationship and if you need to check their personal messages to keep your sanity there is something wrong. If I feel there is something up I will just ask, no need to go around checking up on them behind their backs.


  • Options
    #15
    Aodan83
    Registered Users Posts: 1,110 ✭✭✭Aodan83


    RossFixxxed wrote: »
    I like the sound of the other half.

    Maybe it's cos I'm an only child or something but I'm obsessive about my privacy. There's bugger all of interest on my phone, email, post etc. but it's MINE and I like it that way.
    I have 4 siblings. I dont get much privacy, so what little I do have, I keep.


  • Options
    #16
    IvyTheTerrible
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,949 ✭✭✭✭IvyTheTerrible


    I wouldn't read his text messages, it's a total invasion of privacy. I wouldn't mind if he read mine, but only if he asked first.

    It's the same as opening other people's post or listening in on their phone conversations, not on.

    And if your girlfriend is reading your texts on the sly there is a big problem with trust in that relationship, and you should be considering giving her the heave ho.


  • Options
    #17
    pikachucheeks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    Nova Vast Jaw wrote: »
    I'm...I'm not going out with my cousin, WindSock.

    You're from the country, it's only a matter of time before you are! ;)


  • Options
    #18
    kaimera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,396 ✭✭✭✭kaimera


    No.

    Had an ex want my email pw and **** before and never again.

    **** right off


  • Options
    #19
    Lola92
    Registered Users Posts: 2,192 ✭✭✭Lola92


    My OH won't read my text messages even when asked/demanded to :eek:

    ...meh wouldn't really be bothered to read his- his phone, his business!


  • Options
    #20
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Ex-Wife - "I texted you to let you know that we should meet earlier."
    Me - "Yesterday you gave out to me for reading your texts and now you're giving out to me for not reading your texts. Make up your mind woman.

    You can't win sometimes.


  • Options
    #21
    4zn76tysfajdxp
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    Ex-Wife - "I texted you to let you know that we should meet earlier."
    Me - "Yesterday you gave out to me for reading your texts and now you're giving out to me for not reading your texts. Make up your mind woman.

    You can't win sometimes.

    Ex-wife? Fucking hell, how old are you?


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #22
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Nova Vast Jaw wrote: »
    I'm...I'm not going out with my cousin, WindSock.

    Ah sweet so she finally dumped you. Do you mind if I have a go?


  • Options
    #23
    Pighead
    Registered Users Posts: 14,184 ✭✭✭✭Pighead


    Never ever read Miss Piggys texts. To do so would be deceitful, underhand and would show an inherant lack of trust in her. Anyway she never gets any texts. Not since Pighead took away her phone and locked her in the attic after the private detective Pighead had follow her last Wednesday evening, reported that she was spotted down Earl st talking to a man with a stripey jumper and nice curly hair.


  • Options
    #24
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Nova Vast Jaw wrote: »
    Ex-wife? Fucking hell, how old are you?

    A gentleman never asks. A lady never tells. :)














    So eh.... in my 30's.


  • Options
    #25
    My name is URL
    Registered Users Posts: 25,068 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    The trick is to have messages password protected

    I'd never read anyone elses though


  • Options
    #26
    Amy33
    Closed Accounts Posts: 343 ✭✭Amy33


    I read my ex's texts and found out that he had been cheating on me with a female "friend". He was ranting and raving about his privacy when I confronted him, talk about nerve....


  • Options
    #27
    Insect Overlord
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,866 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    I hate the idea of anyone reading my messages. My OH is the only person who texts me anyway...


  • Options
    #28
    biko
    Registered Users Posts: 81,223 ✭✭✭✭biko


    No but they are probably read by CIA/FBI/Eircom so I never use my own phone for my ingenious plans to take over the world.


  • Options
    #29
    Spark Boy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23 ✭Spark Boy


    If i caught my other half secretly reading my txs it tells me three things 1) they don't feckin trust me 2) bit of a control freak 3) get the hell outta the relationship!! oh ya 4, they can read..


  • Options
    #30
    Sean Quagmire
    Registered Users Posts: 1,334 ✭✭✭Sean Quagmire


    As Chris Rock said 'If youre gonna let a little f*cking get in the way of our love, theres something wrong here baby'


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #31
    pikachucheeks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    trish990 wrote: »
    I read my ex's texts and found out that he had been cheating on me with a female "friend". He was ranting and raving about his privacy when I confronted him, talk about nerve....

    In a way, he was right - You'd have never known about his infidelity, had you not snooped through his phone.

    Granted, what he did was wrong but arguably, you're also somewhat in the wrong, for invading his privacy.


Advertisement