Shnappy retorts and comebacks

formula1 · 12-10-2009 05:07PM #1

right so im changing this...again
i wont start

3hn2givr7mx1sc · 12-10-2009 05:09PM

formula1 wrote: »

Some other lad "jasus ur very short"
Me "so is your knob"

everyone roars laughin, other lad has no retort.

ahhh

any other funny moments....?

Wasn't that funny..

Prof.Badass · 12-10-2009 05:09PM

your ma + any sexual double entendre made out of original phrase
mary harney + eating any object/fitting through any object mentioned in the original phrase

Professey Chin · 12-10-2009 05:10PM

formula1 wrote: »

Some other lad "jasus ur very short"
Me "so is your knob"

everyone roars laughin, other lad has no retort.

ahhh

any other funny moments....?

*tumbleweed*

TheZohanS · 12-10-2009 05:11PM

formula1 wrote: »

Some other lad "jasus ur very short"
Me "so is your knob"

everyone roars laughin, other lad has no retort.

ahhh

any other funny moments....?

So how did you know the size of the other guys penis?

mikom · 12-10-2009 05:11PM

formula1 wrote: »

Some other lad "jasus ur very short"
Me "so is your knob"
any other funny moments....?

Dude that sounds like a brokeback mountain moment.

speedboatchase · 12-10-2009 05:11PM

TheZohan wrote: »

So how did you know the size of the other guys penis?

OH NO HE DI'NT!!

flahavaj · 12-10-2009 05:11PM

Female Politician to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd poison your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

Classic.

Lab_Mouse · 12-10-2009 05:12PM

TheZohan wrote: »

So how did you know the size of the other guys penis?

His ma told him:pac:

4zn76tysfajdxp · 12-10-2009 05:13PM

flahavaj wrote: »

Female Politician to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd poison your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

Classic.

I wish people would stop posting that. Kind of loses it's impact after reading it fifty times.

formula1 · 12-10-2009 05:15PM

baz2009 wrote: »

Wasn't that funny..

not funny on paper
ya needed to be there...

My name is URL · 12-10-2009 05:15PM

'The Jerk Store called, and they're running out of you'

Sleipnir · 12-10-2009 05:18PM

Can we rename the OP's thread to

"Wow, I said something mildly amusing and other people laughed and everything. Look at what I said. It's funny so I am funny too. People do like me and my mummy always says I am special"

speedboatchase · 12-10-2009 05:19PM

Good one to use in a nightclub:

Woman - I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last man on earth!

You - (lean really close in a creepy way and whisper) But then who would be around to stop me ...?

TheIrishGrover · 12-10-2009 05:23PM

baz2009 wrote: »

Wasn't that funny..

Maybe it is if said with a dodgy Sean Connery accent.......

12-10-2009 05:25PM

formula1 wrote: »

right so im changing this...
ill start

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid

Jesus, thats poor.

Warfi · 12-10-2009 05:27PM

My name is URL wrote: »

'The Jerk Store called, and they're running out of you'

'What's the difference, you're their all time best seller!' Poor George never got a break

brummytom · 12-10-2009 05:28PM

formula1 wrote: »

right so im changing this...
ill start

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid

That's even worse.

When you get people hurling abuse at you all the time, you get used to coming up with quick retorts.. can never remember them though.

Size=everything · 12-10-2009 05:31PM

Lady to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd poison your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

Professey Chin · 12-10-2009 05:32PM

Size=everything wrote: »

Lady to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd poison your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

Bit late there :pac:

dr.bollocko · 12-10-2009 05:33PM

/facepalm.

flahavaj · 12-10-2009 05:36PM

Size=everything wrote: »

Lady to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd poison your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

They didn't like this the first time mate.:mad:

ejmaztec · 12-10-2009 05:36PM

rarnes1 wrote: »

Jesus, thats poor.

Poorer than the poorest thing that has ever been posted on a forum, and that's saying something.:eek:

Turd Ferguson · 12-10-2009 05:37PM

Warfi wrote: »

'What's the difference, you're their all time best seller!' Poor George never got a break

Oh yeah...well I had sex with your wife!!

Warfi · 12-10-2009 05:37PM

Someone told me at work one day that I should always be ready to go the extra mile. I told him to go the extra mile.....and stay there.
We're now happily married*

* he was an a*se of the highest order

Warfi · 12-10-2009 05:38PM

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Oh yeah...well I had sex with your wife!!

My wife's in a coma : P

mikom · 12-10-2009 05:40PM

Lady to Winston Churchill "Mr Churchill if I was your wife I'd piss in your tea."

Churchill " Madam, If you were my wife , I'd drink it."

ejmaztec · 12-10-2009 05:41PM

Female Politician to Winston Churchill "Oi fatboy, do you fancy a shag?"

Churchill " Madam, I'll just see if I can wake up the snake."

tech77 · 12-10-2009 05:42PM

Sleipnir wrote: »

Can we rename the OP's thread to

"Wow, I said something mildly amusing and other people laughed and everything. Look at what I said. It's funny so I am funny too. People do like me and my mummy always says I am special"

No.
1. That would exceed the thread title character limit.
2. Only the OP or a mod can edit it.

Try abridging it and asking a mod/the OP. :-l

brummytom · 12-10-2009 05:42PM

Warfi wrote: »

Someone told me at work one day that I should always be ready to go the extra mile. I told him to go the extra mile.....and stay there.
We're now happily married*

* he was an a*se of the highest order

For what my mate said to work, you'd need to know the girl in question sat on him at a party, and she's not the lightest girl in the world.

Danny had been scratching himself in Geography because he was bored, the nutter.
The girl says to him, "Ah you must love pain then Dan?"
He goes, quick as a flash "I do, I let you sit on me didn't I?"

That's the day he became a man in my eyes

DazMarz · 12-10-2009 06:07PM

''Excuse me, do you mind if I smoke?''

''I don't care if you burn.''

Brilliant

Shnappy retorts and comebacks

Comments