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Need Advice!!

2»

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭flanum


    Dont follow the OP to the wonderland... hes a dirty kidnapping paedophile ****... jaycee... jaycee???

    oops sorry, what was the qusetion?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭flanum


    If you could give your child(your real child or for the youthful ones, future child) one piece of advice, one pearl of wisdom that they could live their life by, what would it be?

    never ever ever trust a family member that sddenly decides to join the guards!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,122 ✭✭✭LadyJ


    Buy the Tesco chocolate puddings instead of the M&S ones. They're exactly the same except cheaper. Oh and never go to mass because you'll probably have inherited the gene for bursting your hole laughing when people are silent and when you try to do it quietly you'll just start shaking and then everyone in the whole row will know you're laughing because you'll shake so hard that the bench will move too....

    In short, be an atheist and learn when to spot a bargain.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭flanum


    Dont let "flanum" near the pc, cos hes langers and gonna be writin stuff in loads of forums when he should actually be asleep... the bollox!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 515 ✭✭✭In All Fairness


    "To thine own self be true" - Shakespeare


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    "To thine own self be true" - Shakespeare

    Was waiting for someone to say that.

    Look thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
    Nor any unproportion'd thought his act.
    Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
    Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
    Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
    But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
    Of each new-hatch'd, unfledg’d comrade. Beware
    Of entrance to a quarrel but, being in,
    Bear't that th' opposed may beware of thee.
    Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
    Take each man's censure, but reserve thy judgement.
    Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
    But not express'd in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
    For the apparel oft proclaims the man;
    And they in France of the best rank and station
    Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
    Neither a borrower, nor a lender be;
    For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
    And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
    This above all: to thine own self be true,
    And it must follow, as the night the day,
    Thou canst not then be false to any man.



    Ah and what the hell, while we're on the quoting the fancy stuff:



    IF you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
    And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

    If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
    If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    ' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
    if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
    And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

    -Kipling


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,082 ✭✭✭Pygmalion


    This board in the floor is loose, you can hide stuff in there, your mother knows nothing about it.
    This way you don't get in trouble for drinking, ****ing and smoking weed, and I don't have to waste my time punishing you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,082 ✭✭✭Pygmalion


    Double


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 515 ✭✭✭In All Fairness


    orestes wrote: »
    Was waiting for someone to say that.

    Look thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
    Nor any unproportion'd thought his act.
    Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
    Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
    Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
    But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
    Of each new-hatch'd, unfledg’d comrade. Beware
    Of entrance to a quarrel but, being in,
    Bear't that th' opposed may beware of thee.
    Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
    Take each man's censure, but reserve thy judgement.
    Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
    But not express'd in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
    For the apparel oft proclaims the man;
    And they in France of the best rank and station
    Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
    Neither a borrower, nor a lender be;
    For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
    And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
    This above all: to thine own self be true,
    And it must follow, as the night the day,
    Thou canst not then be false to any man.



    Ah and what the hell, while we're on the quoting the fancy stuff:



    IF you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
    And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

    If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
    If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    ' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
    if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
    And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

    -Kipling

    Legend mate. If I could only advise my child to read two things, it would be those two passages.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,650 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    Either

    If you can't lift her you may as well shift her.

    Or



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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,264 ✭✭✭Cookie Jar


    The grass is always appears greener on the other side!!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,650 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    Cookie Jar wrote: »
    The grass is always greener on the other side!!!

    I think that should be ammended.

    The Grass always APPEARS Greener on the other side.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,488 ✭✭✭pikachucheeks


    Make sure you're passionate about things in life.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 222 ✭✭Trankton


    If you're not living life on the edge...you're taking up too much room!!!

    Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but gets you no-where!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,264 ✭✭✭Cookie Jar


    I think that should be ammended.

    The Grass always APPEARS Greener on the other side.

    From my side its always is greener on the other side:pac:*




    *edited


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,976 ✭✭✭✭humanji


    Don't pick at it, it really does make it worse.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,654 ✭✭✭cruiser178


    Pay the woman or leave the bed..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,880 ✭✭✭Canis Lupus


    Don't start playing computer games.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,803 ✭✭✭El Siglo


    "Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,034 ✭✭✭deadhead13




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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 204 ✭✭TheAlmightyZeus


    Don't go down the road of necrophilia. It's a dead end.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,174 ✭✭✭D


    Never make your mind up about a woman until you meet her mother.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,659 ✭✭✭CrazyRabbit


    Wikipedia lies!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 108 ✭✭Alexl


    Instead of being half friends with loads of people, try and create a small tightly knit group of friends who can open up to, and count on for everything!!!!! These are the ones who you can be yourself around, because everyone needs to take their guard down every once in a while


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,525 ✭✭✭DanGerMus


    If you're snookered on the pink, aim for the brown

    ...and never let the white go down.:pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 512 ✭✭✭wilson10


    Never look for permission, only forgiveness.


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