is this harsh

AckwelFoley · 06-09-2009 10:38PM

OP, you are wishing your daughter grows up and moves out..

dont be so anxious for that.. in a few more years she will be gone and you will see little of her..

Professey Chin · 06-09-2009 10:44PM

So you want her to be in her own place where she can go out,get stupidly twisted,come home at whatever hour she wants and get buggered silly all over the place by many many guys at once

Nice

06-09-2009 10:44PM

Ultimate Chin wrote: »

So you want her to be in her own place where she can go out,come home at whatever hour she wants and get buggered silly all over the place by many many guys at once

Nice

exactly what I was thinking, just didn't want to say it out loud!

Professey Chin · 06-09-2009 10:51PM

Deleted User wrote: »

exactly what I was thinking, just didn't want to say it out loud!

Then I like how your mind works

liah · 06-09-2009 10:58PM

Dear lord, the amount of mollycoddlers in this thread is upsetting.

I don't know what it is about the culture here but the amount of people who are in their early to mid twenties (and even into their 30's) who are still living at home is absolutely mental.

So you want her to be in her own place where she can go out,get stupidly twisted,come home at whatever hour she wants and get buggered silly all over the place by many many guys at once

Uh.. and? She's going to be doing that in a few years regardless. I think the OP is being a mature and realistic parent to be completely honest. You can't keep your kid in a bubble forever mate, she's gotta experience the real world at one point or another. If she's ready to go to college then she's ready to be thrown in feet first. 18 is definitely not too young to be doing these sorts of things-- the age of 18 is the age of adulthood for a reason.

Give me a break.

People just don't seem to want to learn responsibility these days. I mean it's one thing if you honestly cannot find work but even then, you can go on the dole and find a cheap enough place to rent. Most of the "adults" I see still living with their parents not only use their parents for everything (car, extra cash, university funds, food, laundry, etc) but go out boozing every weekend with their dole money instead of doing anything smart with it like saving it or using it for their own place and food.

Quite often they won't bother to leave until their parents truly force them out because they just plain can't be bothered supporting themselves; I mean, why would they, if they've got mammy and daddy looking out for them no matter what they do?

Sad, really. People need responsibilities, relying on your parents to support everything you do isn't fair on yourself or them.

Professey Chin · 06-09-2009 10:59PM

liah wrote: »

Dear lord, the amount of mollycoddlers in this thread is upsetting.

I don't know what it is about the culture here but the amount of people who are in their early to mid twenties (and even into their 30's) who are still living at home is absolutely mental.

Uh.. and? She's going to be doing that in a few years regardless. I think the OP is being a mature and realistic parent to be completely honest. You can't keep your kid in a bubble forever mate, she's gotta experience the real world at one point or another. If she's ready to go to college then she's ready to be thrown in feet first. 18 is definitely not too young to be doing these sorts of things-- the age of 18 is the age of adulthood for a reason.

Give me a break.

People just don't seem to want to learn responsibility these days. I mean it's one thing if you honestly cannot find work but even then, you can go on the dole and find a cheap enough place to rent. Most of the "adults" I see still living with their parents not only use their parents for everything (car, extra cash, university funds, food, laundry, etc) but go out boozing every weekend with their dole money instead of doing anything smart with it like saving it or using it for their own place and food.

Quite often they won't bother to leave until their parents truly force them out because they just plain can't be bothered supporting themselves; I mean, why would they, if they've got mammy and daddy looking out for them no matter what they do?

Sad, really. People need responsibilities, relying on your parents to support everything you do isn't fair on yourself or them.

Did you just ignore the "nice" and decide to lecture me

liah · 06-09-2009 11:02PM

Ultimate Chin wrote: »

Did you just ignore the "nice" and decide to lecture me

I assumed the nice was sarcastic and it implied you thought the OP would be an irresponsible parent to allow her daughter to partake in these things. Was I wrong?

phasers · 06-09-2009 11:04PM

Erm... alright then, since this is getting serious.

Basically, I, and probably most other students, don't have ten grand to live away from home and my parents' house is nice and close.There aren't many jobs going right now (Especially if you've no experience). I do stuff around the house and understand the value of money.

Why do students have to move out and get themselves into debt in order to "experience life"? A lot of people here are under estimating college students. We're not all retards who think money appears out of thin air.

I understand a student paying for their own education but forcing them to move out for no good reason is ridiculous.

Sofiztikated · 06-09-2009 11:06PM

A swift slap in the ovaries, and she'll be running out the door.

/End AH answer

Can't see whats wrong with her moving out, need to grow up and get on your feet sometime, and college is great way to do that.

I moved out when I was 19, working 5 days a week, one day release college, and did me the world of good.

(Still can't manage my money, but thats my own fault because I like nice things, and I hoard ****)

I did nothing when I was at home, I was spoilt, but cooking, cleaning, budgeting, socialising and time management all came calling quickly.

MagicMarker · 06-09-2009 11:09PM

liah wrote: »

Dear lord, the amount of mollycoddlers in this thread is upsetting.

I don't know what it is about the culture here but the amount of people who are in their early to mid twenties (and even into their 30's) who are still living at home is absolutely mental.

Uh.. and? She's going to be doing that in a few years regardless. I think the OP is being a mature and realistic parent to be completely honest. You can't keep your kid in a bubble forever mate, she's gotta experience the real world at one point or another. If she's ready to go to college then she's ready to be thrown in feet first. 18 is definitely not too young to be doing these sorts of things-- the age of 18 is the age of adulthood for a reason.

Give me a break.

People just don't seem to want to learn responsibility these days. I mean it's one thing if you honestly cannot find work but even then, you can go on the dole and find a cheap enough place to rent. Most of the "adults" I see still living with their parents not only use their parents for everything (car, extra cash, university funds, food, laundry, etc) but go out boozing every weekend with their dole money instead of doing anything smart with it like saving it or using it for their own place and food.

Quite often they won't bother to leave until their parents truly force them out because they just plain can't be bothered supporting themselves; I mean, why would they, if they've got mammy and daddy looking out for them no matter what they do?

Sad, really. People need responsibilities, relying on your parents to support everything you do isn't fair on yourself or them.

So what you're saying is, anyone who still lives with their parents from 18 onwards is irresponsible?

Bollox.

How is your mammy paying your rent for you to live on your own being responsible? Where you live has no bearing on how responsible a person you are. Not everyone who lives with their parents rely on their parents for everything.

Professey Chin · 06-09-2009 11:10PM

liah wrote: »

I assumed the nice was sarcastic and it implied you thought the OP would be an irresponsible parent to allow her daughter to partake in these things. Was I wrong?

Nope.I got it from here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hdbns1Xdk0

06-09-2009 11:11PM

JuliusCaesar wrote: »

My 16 year old has been getting himself up for school for years (since starting secondary school), makes his own lunches, cooks dinner a couple of times a week

All while you sit there strung out on smack...

liah · 06-09-2009 11:17PM

MagicMarker wrote: »

So what you're saying is, anyone who still lives with their parents from 18 onwards is irresponsible?

Bollox.

How is your mammy paying your rent for you to live on your own being responsible? Where you live has no bearing on how responsible a person you are. Not everyone who lives with their parents rely on their parents for everything.

I never said that scenario WAS responsible. Not sure where you got it from tbh.

I was giving out about the people who do take advantage of their parents and don't think twice about how their parents may feel about it. It's disrespect and selfishness tbh.

Anna Molly · 06-09-2009 11:30PM

Is there something wrong with her that she doesnt want to move out?
I coudn't wait!

Professey Chin · 06-09-2009 11:32PM

Anna Molly wrote: »

Is there something wrong with her that she doesnt want to move out?
I coudn't wait!

For my reasons stated above :pac:

Hrududu · 06-09-2009 11:38PM

This thread is gas, so many people getting offended that you want your daughter to learn to take care of herself. She's 18, she's going to college this is the perfect time and age for her to move out. Thousands of students that don't live near University and don't have the option to live at home do this every year. It's part of growing up. I work with a lot of people pushing into their late 20s that still live with Mammy. And a shocking number of these get their washing, cooking etc still done for them too.

I'd be seriously embarrassed if I wasn't able to get myself up for school at the age of 17. So yeah, encourage her to move out. But make sure she knows that its always her home if she needs it.

Elessar · 06-09-2009 11:51PM

I will continue to live at home until I am 30 in glorious protest at the high-horses in this thread. :pac:

"Ma, what time is dinner at?"

Hrududu · 06-09-2009 11:53PM

As time goes by it takes less and less to be accused of being on a high horse

"I wash mahself with a rag on a stick"

"Get off your high horse"

This_Years_Love · 07-09-2009 12:04AM

Have you considered that it might be better for her to live at home due to the way the economy is at the moment? She might not be able to get a part-time job to help support herself. You could end up paying all her bills for her. That could be very expensive... definitely much more expensive then a cheap secondhand car would cost. Can you afford that?

deisedude · 07-09-2009 12:37AM

mariaalice wrote: »

i was having a discussion with my teenage daughter about college...if she gets into the college she want..i live just about near enough for her to commute there by car.....some of her cousins do that...

now im dead set again that and my reasons are

at 18 she'll be an adult and i want her to go away to college

i want her... to realise that if you don't budge properly and spend all you money on drink or what ever youll go hungry

If an 18 year old doesnt realise that then they are prob too stupid to get into college

if you don't do your laundry you'll run out of clean clothes

Shes a student, clean clothes isnt that high on the agenda

to learn that you have to get yourself up in the morning

Many students will dispute that

i want her to make new friend, have different experiences, cook for herself

She can do that living at home too

to learn that you parents wouldn't always be there to rescue you.

Rescue her from what? A fire?

her cousins that commute to college still hang around with the same friends they had in secondary school

They can still hang around with their secondary school friends regardless where they live

Basically the point of my post is that just because your daughter moves out of home for college doesnt mean she will become a responsible adult overnight. They can be equally as immature living away from home

Aurora Borealis · 07-09-2009 01:09AM

phasers wrote: »

Why do you hate your daughter OP?

Jesus that really made me laugh out loud!! Brilliant!!!

Sir Molle · 07-09-2009 01:32AM

How does one afford the cost of living in this country while studying in college?

Professey Chin · 07-09-2009 02:01AM

Sir Molle wrote: »

How does one afford the cost of living in this country while studying in college?

Prostitution

sharky86 · 07-09-2009 02:09AM

Ultimate Chin wrote: »

Prostitution

What is this pros-tit-ution you speak about? explain please...with pictures

Kold · 07-09-2009 02:16AM

Well as long as you accept that it could backfire and she could become one of those girls who is always mooching off a guy and every time they break up with one, they're with a new one two weeks later.

Professey Chin · 07-09-2009 02:17AM

sharky86 wrote: »

What is this pros-tit-ution you speak about? explain please...with pictures

Im male so I really doubt you wanna see the prostitution I had to do to get through college:pac:

Sir Molle · 07-09-2009 02:47AM

Ultimate Chin wrote: »

Prostitution

Eh yeah. Nice try, but nobody would ever pay to have sex with you.

07-09-2009 10:12AM

now i know I'll probably be slated for this...

i know the vast majority of 18..19..20yearolds..love and respect there parents, understand how hard they work ect...do there own laundry, cook, and clean up after themselves help with the housework... never have a few mates over for a party when their parents are away...ye are all saints!.....

but to the tiny weeny minority that engage in what id call magical thinking....for example the 20year old student that told me i pay for my own car... translation i pay for petrol with money from my part time job convientily forgetting about the tax, insurance, nct, that was paid for by their parents.

The son of someone i work with who was looking for a part-time job said he wanted to work in a music shop or xtravision and that he wouldn't work in a place like supermacks or McDonald's..he wanted a "nice" job...i know im going to get replies saying id take any job.

on deeper point...i would like to keep my daughter away from the consumerest/ wage slave culture we live in for as long as possible....a car costs thousands to run..im also against student get ting credit cards.

your time as a student should be a bout discovering yourself, losing the bonds with home ( while always knowing home is there if you need it )...having fun and being free of a lot of responsibilities,

biko · 07-09-2009 10:19AM

I moved into a student dorm at university, great times altogether.
However, I could already cook and clean before that

Posting in AH is going to get you some flak, most posters here still live at home (my extensive research tells me).

MagicMarker · 07-09-2009 10:21AM

mariaalice wrote: »

now i know I'll probably be slated for this...

i know the vast majority of 18..19..20yearolds..love and respect there parents, understand how hard they work ect...do there own laundry, cook, and clean up after themselves help with the housework... never have a few mates over for a party when their parents are away...ye are all saints!.....

but to the tiny weeny minority that engage in what id call magical thinking....for example the 20year old student that told me i pay for my own car... translation i pay for petrol with money from my part time job convientily forgetting about the tax, insurance, nct, that was paid for by their parents.

The son of someone i work with who was looking for a part-time job said he wanted to work in a music shop or xtravision and that he wouldn't work in a place like supermacks or McDonald's..he wanted a "nice" job...i know im going to get replies saying id take any job.

on deeper point...i would like to keep my daughter away from the consumerest/ wage slave culture we live in for as long as possible....a car costs thousands to run..im also against student get ting credit cards.

your time as a student should be a bout discovering yourself, losing the bonds with home ( while always knowing home is there if you need it )...having fun and being free of a lot of responsibilities,

Why are you complaining? You're deciding between buying a car for your son/daughter or paying their rent for them? How is that any different to the above scenario?

If you really want your offspring to experience the real world, then tell them to **** off, don't give them any money, make them work full time while paying their own way through college.

Why don't you just be honest and tell him/her that you don't want them around anymore, cos that's how you're coming across.

is this harsh

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