Wearing White to a Wedding

Malari · 25-08-2009 04:00PM

crazy angel wrote: »

having worked in an occasion wear shop, i know that people have HUGE issues with wearing white to a wedding.

however....imo it would take some heck of a dress to upstage a bride.......unless you go for a floor length. its such a petty, childish thing to get upset over.

Yeah, it strikes me as something the guests seem to be more concerned with than the bride.

stiff kitten · 25-08-2009 04:04PM

never wear white to wedding. it takes the pure and unique look away from the bride.
you can wear a white dress with different coloured patterns, flowers, white shawl etc.. :pac:

astrofool · 25-08-2009 04:08PM

Curvy Vixen wrote: »

It's absolutely ridiculous. The point of being a 'bride' is to be in a particular place at a certain time to marry the man that you love. Not to be a Trinny and Susannah spotting the woman that hates you in the congregation!

You can't wear white, you can't wear black, you can't wear green, you can't wear red shoes...wtf???

At my wedding both my Mum and my SIL to be wore white/cream and they looked stunning! Who cares? I was the one in the glittery tiara and the long veil carrying the bunch of flowers at the head of the aisle not them! If anyone missed me or confused me then they should have gone to Specsavers!

And what do you do if you turn up in a lovely red dress having left the white one at home and the bride arrives...all in red??? Times and traditions change and although the bride will 'probably' be wearing white (or one of the million versions of white) it's not guaranteed nowadays.

Brides need to get over themselves and know what the real priority of the day is!

I'm sure if someone turned up wearing a glittery tiara and a long veil, you'd have had something to say.

It's all about degrees of offence for each individual

Nevyn · 25-08-2009 04:19PM

Senna wrote: »

I'm a fella:D i just posted this because i though it was strange that a women would purposely wear white to a wedding to get a dig in at the bride. Thats the way the stories came across to me and i was wondering if its well known.

Yes it is known and yes it is part and parcel of the traditions that go with a wedding. Wearing all black is out as well as you are then wearing mourning wear and so is for a lot of people wearing red ( if you are female ) as you are being a scarlette woman or reminding people of blood and loss on the day and it is said to be unlucky to do so the same way having a clearly visible pregnant woman at a wedding is meant to be lucky in terms of some of her fertility rubbing off on the couple getting married.

Weddings are about traditions and there are often taboos which go hand and hand with traditions, not everyone subscribes to such things but many people do and while wearing such colours may not offend the young couple getting married often other family members will not be impressed at all.

If it is a traditional wedding then the traditions and taboos are meant to be held to, if it's not then they aren't.

flibbertyjibbet · 25-08-2009 04:19PM

What's the "symbol" behind wearing green at a wedding?

That you're jealous? :pac:

Bridey6189 · 25-08-2009 04:32PM

Lollipops23 wrote: »

It's not something i'd ever do tbh. yes it's an antiquitated rule, but is it really that much bother to wear something that's not white..??!! i mean, even if I was going to a formal ball or something I doubt I'd wear a white dress, for fear of looking like a bride!
I do realise some brides go over the top with regards to the dresscode- I recently heard of one sending an email around to all female guests telling them not to expose shoulders and legs, pick one or the other!!crazy cow!!

Ha ha i was at a wedding recently and the bride sent all her friends an email telling them not to get their oufits at karen millen, coast & some other one - she obviously got the bridemaid dresses there cos they were knee length kind of cocktail style - and didn't want the guests turning up wearing the same thing. Thought it was a bit cheeky, she shouldn't have bought them there then

Malari · 25-08-2009 04:59PM

Bridey6189 wrote: »

Ha ha i was at a wedding recently and the bride sent all her friends an email telling them not to get their oufits at karen millen, coast & some other one - she obviously got the bridemaid dresses there cos they were knee length kind of cocktail style - and didn't want the guests turning up wearing the same thing. Thought it was a bit cheeky, she shouldn't have bought them there then

I think I would send my friends a pic of the dress I was wearing. No-one else wants to show up in the same dress!

Oh The Humanity · 25-08-2009 05:23PM

Its a well known thing that it is bad manners to wear white to a wedding.

Although I have heard loads of brides saying they don't mind I think its looked at as attention seeking and setting yourself up as 'competition' to the bride.

I think if there is any chance of causing offence it is better to err on the safe side and wear another colour!

It is after all 'the Brides Day'

25-08-2009 05:28PM

My sister-in-law wore a wedding dress to my wedding :rolleyes:

SheRa · 25-08-2009 06:34PM

00112984 wrote: »

My sister-in-law wore a wedding dress to my wedding :rolleyes:

:eek::eek:
im guessing that you dont get on so.

in my opinion wearing all white or cream skirt/dress to a wedding is very rude and looks like you are trying to upstage the bride.

Curvy Vixen · 25-08-2009 06:51PM

It looks like an attempt to upstage the bride, that is why it is offensive. It is her day.

Last wedding I went to, it was actually their day....

astrofool wrote: »

I'm sure if someone turned up wearing a glittery tiara and a long veil, you'd have had something to say.

I'm sorry but that's crap ~ you don't know me. I would actually have got a great laugh from that.

I can tell you, hand on heart, that I could not, if offered a million quid, tell you what any of my guests wore on my wedding day from memory.

I can tell you that my husband and I got married and that we all had a ball and that's all that mattered :rolleyes:

SeekUp · 25-08-2009 06:56PM

missmatty wrote: »

Apparently you're not supposed to wear green either?

Marz66 wrote: »

I think the not wearing red/green tradition is gone now though, people don't even know what it means anymore.

*Raises hand* I've never heard of not wearing green!! Whassat mean?

00112984 wrote: »

My sister-in-law wore a wedding dress to my wedding :rolleyes:

Aaaaaaaahahaha!! Classic.

Dudess · 25-08-2009 07:37PM

Oh The Humanity wrote: »

It is after all 'the Brides Day'

Where everything else is concerned, I think it's the couple's day, but when it comes to the sartorial side of things, yes, I think it's more the "bride's day" (generally speaking).

Now I think most (nearly all) wedding "rules" are bollocks, but to be fair, if the bride is wearing white (and doing so because she likes the colour is one thing, but doing it "just because it's tradition" is silly - the key part of the tradition is, in the majority of cases, broken anyway :pac:) then a guest wearing pure white (or "pure" any colour that completely matches the bride's dress/get-up) just seems like thunder-stealing/attention-seeking all right. I'm not referring to e.g. a white dress with a black sash and black shawl, I'm also not referring to "variants" of white (apparently the "rule" includes these also - I wore cream to the wedding of one of my best friends and there was uber shock from people I mentioned it to the day before. It was a genuine mistake... and my friend didn't give a sh1t).
But yeah, whatever about a trouser suit, wearing a pure white dress to a wedding as a guest just seems like a bizarre thing to do - it's not something women tend to do anyway, never mind at weddings.
Heh, I actually heard of a wedding where one of the guests wore her wedding dress. :eek: Kinda funny though...

Yeah, what's the green thing? I've never heard of that.

Marz66 · 26-08-2009 12:21AM

I think green is unlucky!!! Brings bad luck to a wedding!

Doesn't leave many colours left;)

jmbkay · 26-08-2009 12:44AM

Yeah, green used to be considered unlucky. I dont think it is anymore. It was considered bad manners to wear white in fear of "Upstaging" the bride. This doesnt appear to apply anymore. Just wear what you want.

Dudess · 26-08-2009 12:46AM

Marz66 wrote: »

I think green is unlucky!!! Brings bad luck to a wedding!

:mad:
/throws four-leaved clover in the bin

Hermione* · 26-08-2009 12:48AM

pikachucheeks wrote: »

Isn't white supposed to symbolise innocence and virginity? I heard that before.
I've been paranoid ever since. If I ever did get married, I wouldn't want to be a fraud in my white dress for not being ... pure, but at the same time, I'd hate to cause outrage amongst the more traditional members of my family by not wearing a white dress!
:pac:

White wedding dresses only became popular in the 19th Century after Queen Victoria wore a white dress when she married Albert in 1839. Brides were expected to be virgins long before they took to wearing white dresses for the occassion. At the time Victoria married, white was actually the colour of court mourning and therefore a very unusual and orginal choice for her wedding dress.

I was always told by my mother and grandmother that it was very poor form to wear either white or back (in whatever form) to a wedding. Mother's explanation was that just as it's good etiquette for a man to be wearing a shirt and tie, similarly it's good etiquette to pick a colour for your outfit. I really don't see why it's so hard to avoid the two - it's a special occassion, so it deserves a little extra effort.

metaoblivia · 26-08-2009 07:32PM

My mother always told me that you never wear white to a wedding and you never wear black to a wedding (unless it's an evening wedding). There are many other colors in the palette so I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm sure many modern brides wouldn't really care though. A friend of mine is getting married next summer and she wants all of her bridesmaids in black. Thought it was a little unusual myself, but it's her wedding and her choice!

26-08-2009 08:09PM

flibbertyjibbet wrote: »

What's the "symbol" behind wearing green at a wedding?
That you're jealous? :pac:

Green clothes in general are unlucky, I don't think you're meant to wear them on boats either.

pickarooney · 26-08-2009 10:27PM

994 wrote: »

Green clothes in general are unlucky, I don't think you're meant to wear them on boats either.

So a St. Patrick's day parade would pit the Luck of the Irish against the Ill Fate of the Green Cloth in a cosmic Battle of the Fortunes?

Is there any rule about men wearing the same colour as the groom?

Blush_01 · 26-08-2009 10:40PM

I'd never consider wearing white to a wedding - it's hugely impolite! I don't mind if the bride doesn't mind, but I would consider it great rudeness on my part to wear a white dress, and think it's a bit disrespectful.

I'd never heard anything about black, green or red before this thread though - oops! The last wedding I went to, I wore a green dress. The wedding before that, green shoes. Two weddings before that, red shoes and a black dress. The wedding before that, black dress. The wedding before that, black dress... the list goes on. At four of those weddings, the bridesmaids wore black... I guess I was in good company?

Dolbert · 26-08-2009 11:20PM

Meh, I've worn green to the last two wedding I was at and no-one batted an eyelid. I loves green

I'd never wear white to a wedding though, not just for fear of upsetting the bride, but to avoid the inevitable death stares from the rest of the congregation

2 stroke · 27-08-2009 02:11AM

I was at a wedding where a guest arraived wearing the same outfit as the bridesmaid, She slipped away and came back wearing jeans.

IvyTheTerrible · 27-08-2009 08:53AM

I'd never wear white to a wedding, it's just not the done thing. Anyway, my skin is way too pale for white, and I hate fake tan, so it wouldn't suit me wnyway!

Oh The Humanity · 27-08-2009 12:52PM

00112984 wrote: »

My sister-in-law wore a wedding dress to my wedding :rolleyes:

Tell me more! The scandal!!!

I worked with a girl who was at a wedding and some nutcase wore her own wedding get up -veil and all :eek: to a wedding she was at!

Seemingly she was a bit radio rental but why someone take her home in a white straitjacket I don't know.....

Raiser · 27-08-2009 07:03PM

missmatty wrote: »

Apparently you're not supposed to wear green either? Only heard that after i wore a dark green top to the last wedding i was at. Tbh the whole thing is a bit silly.

Lollipops23 wrote: »

It's not something i'd ever do tbh. yes it's an antiquitated rule, but is it really that much bother to wear something that's not white..??!! i mean, even if I was going to a formal ball or something I doubt I'd wear a white dress, for fear of looking like a bride!
I do realise some brides go over the top with regards to the dresscode- I recently heard of one sending an email around to all female guests telling them not to expose shoulders and legs, pick one or the other!!crazy cow!!

Bridey6189 wrote: »

Ha ha i was at a wedding recently and the bride sent all her friends an email telling them not to get their oufits at karen millen, coast & some other one - she obviously got the bridemaid dresses there cos they were knee length kind of cocktail style - and didn't want the guests turning up wearing the same thing. Thought it was a bit cheeky, she shouldn't have bought them there then

And not the Bride - but the same type of stupid character defect:

peanuthead wrote: »

I think it's kind of stupid.

Thats what I think it is. There are a lot of silly rules about what to wear/what not to wear to a wedding, eg: i recently went to a wedding wearing red shoes - I was told I was trying to steal the groom ... wtf??

But one thing I would NEVER do is wear white. Thats just stupid. I don't think your friends are being silly, and if they're not being bitchy, then they're just thick

Das Kitty wrote:

Something similar happened at mine with my friend's baby, I even had him on the invite, some of our guests were so rude about the baby being there! Someone even came up to me bitching about the cheek of them bringing him.

Some Brides are just as ignorant as the Women they fear might upstage them on their Attentionwhore Wedding day - Now what they really do deserve is a Woman in the sexiest white dress on Earth to pull up outside the church in a red convertible at precisely the moment the Bridezilla is - the kind of convertible that you can't get out of without making it clear you are wearing fine French Lingerie. She should be 2 inches taller than her, classically beautiful, toned, pert, tanned and have a personality that makes the Groom seriously reconsider his lifes future

I've heard the whole "leave the Baby at home" line mentioned in a really matter-of-fact manner as a tactic to keep attention focussed on the Bride......What?????

- Here, have another crappy toaster ya self-obsessed Cow..... :pac:

Lilym · 27-08-2009 10:51PM

General rule is not to where white I think it is just to respect the bride but I don't know where it came from

Wearing White to a Wedding

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