Skinnydipping. Is it liberating?

Pighead · 19-05-2009 04:45PM #1

Pighead was in the pub last weekend watching the Eurovision Song Contest as is customary for every self respecting Irish man and woman to do at this time of year. It was a great night, the pubs pipes had been recently cleaned ensuring the beer tasted good and better still the best song won by a country mile.

Everyone was in great form and as tends to happen when people are in great form and are getting drunk, the conversation got a little racy. Sarah the Slapper was just back from a holiday in Cyprus and she started banging on about the skinny dipping session she had experienced the previous weekend and how liberating it had been.

Pighead must have made a snorting sound because she says:
"What are you snorting for Pighead? It was liberating. Haven't you done it before?"

Pighead snorted some more and basically told her to stop being so ridiculous.

"How can taking your clothes off and going into the sea in the nip be liberating? Face it Sarah, you done it for the attention factor. You done it because you're Sarah the Slapper"

"Load of bollox Pighead. I done it because I wanted to feel liberated and because I'm proud of my body. You've obviously got something to be ashamed of which is why you've never done it."

Cue howls of laughter from the table and the everybody doing the wagging the little finger thing that implies you've got a tiny todger. The laughter stopped almost as soon as it started. Pighead was determined to nip it in the bud so slapped his todger on to the tables. They all put their little fingers away and apologised profusely as the conversation continued.

It turned out that out of a gang of seven of us, Pighead was the only one who had never skinnydipped. And more shockingly five of them had done it in this country. The coldest country in the world not counting Iceland. Are these people insane? Have you ever skinnydipped? Is it liberating? Is Pighead a prude? Is that Norwegian song the best Eurovision song ever?

4zn76tysfajdxp · 19-05-2009 04:50PM

Pighead wrote: »

Have you ever skinnydipped?

No.

Is Pighead a prude?

No:

Pighead was determined to nip it in the bud so slapped his todger on to the tables.

liah · 19-05-2009 04:52PM

Yes to all of the above.

including the todger.

boardinwork · 19-05-2009 04:55PM

I went skinny dipping in Barcelona outside some club on a beach with a few mates. We were all hammered drunk - Felt liberating enough but once we got out i found my jeans gone with along with wallet and phone.

The Prude that didnt want to skinny dip with us had said he would watch our gear (as there were a load of dodgeballs around) but got distracted by some girls and didnt notice the scumbag nab my trousers.

The feeling of liberation was lost. Especially holding my salted pecker all the way home in a taxi :mad:

themadchef · 19-05-2009 04:56PM

Piggy baby, i've missed you.

This thread makes me picture you running out of the water like something out of Swamp Thing James Bond... bad Piggy.

Skinny dipping is exactly that... for skinny folk. count me out.

Pighead · 19-05-2009 04:56PM

Quentin Famous Fridge wrote: »

No.

Pigheads surprised that a man from the West like you hasn't skinnydipped before Quentin Famous Fridge. The men over that side of the country tend to be rustic and at one with nature and you also have the Atlantic Sellafield free waters on your doorstep which is a luxury us Easties can only dream of.

Why have you never skinnydipped? Are you like Pighead and fail to see the point of it all?

Morrisseeee · 19-05-2009 04:56PM

so slapped his todger on to the tables

I'd imagine thats liberating ! Ah, yes, feel better now, /ziiiip.

Quazzie · 19-05-2009 04:57PM

I went skinny dipping after a niteclub years ago in Youghal. Dis it feel liberating? Sure. Did my todger shrivel to 1/15th its normal size with the cold? Definitely.

Anybody can whip it out and be proud in a watrm pub Pighead. Letting it loose in a cold sea may have different results.

Abi · 19-05-2009 04:58PM

Pighead wrote: »

Pighead must have made a snorting sound because she says:"What are you snorting for Pighead? It was liberating. Haven't you done it before?"

Pighead snorted some more and basically told her to stop being so ridiculous.

"How can taking your clothes off and going into the sea in the nip be liberating? Face it Sarah, you done it for the attention factor. You done it because you're Sarah the Slapper"

So, this was really Mrs Pighead wasn't it? She went on hols without Pighead and got nekkid right? :pac:

And more shockingly five of them had done it in this country. The coldest country in the world not counting Iceland. Are these people insane?

I've done it here. You don't feel the cold when you are horny, or drunk, or drunk and horny.

Have you ever skinnydipped?

Yes, while away and here.

Is it liberating?

If ye like.

Is Pighead a prude?

Yes.

Is that Norwegian song the best Eurovision song ever?

If ye like.

Borneo Fnctn · 19-05-2009 05:00PM

Gave it a go in Maine last summer. I'd do it again. Naturally I was drunk out of it and shouldn't have gone near the lake. There was a diving board and if you jump off at just the right angle you're goolies get a good smack from the water. Bad buzz.

Pighead · 19-05-2009 05:06PM

Abigayle wrote: »

I've done it here. You don't feel the cold when you are horny, or drunk, or drunk and horny.

Just as Pighead suspected. This whole Skinnydipping being liberating nonsense is a load of tosh. It's totally sexually related and is just a convenient cover for people who are a bit sneaky about finding ways to make love. It's like when you join a cult. There's vague religious reasons for joining but the real reason you join up is because you've heard they have an orgy every Wednesday evening in the Cult leaders basement.

Abi · 19-05-2009 05:08PM

Pighead wrote: »

Just as Pighead suspected. This whole Skinnydipping being liberating nonsense is a load of tosh. It's totally sexually related and is just a convenient cover for people who are a bit sneaky about finding ways to make love. It's like when you join a cult. There's vague religious reasons for joining but the real reason you join up is because you've heard they have an orgy every Wednesday evening in the Cult leaders basement.

*filthy eyes*

Come baby. Join our dirty sexy cult.

4zn76tysfajdxp · 19-05-2009 05:10PM

Pighead wrote: »

Pigheads surprised that a man from the West like you hasn't skinnydipped before Frada.

It's pronounced "Wesht."

The men over that side of the country tend to be rustic and at one with nature and you also have the Atlantic Sellafield free waters on your doorstep which is a luxury us Easties can only dream of. Why have you never skinnydipped? Are you like Pighead and fail to see the point of it all?

You are correct in your assumption about westerners, their rustic ways and our close proximities to clean beaches (I'm off for a walk on the beach soon). Unfortunately, I'm an exception to that stereotype. While all the other hairy, manly children were out playing in the nude on the beaches, I was at home being rotund, derided and jokingly offered a spare bra from my mother.

The prospect of seeing me on the beach would also lead to a rise (apart from "in the ocean ho ho ho") in playing those familiar childhood games "Let's drown the fat kid" or "Let's make the fat kid eat sand."

Therefore, I've never skinny dipped and I can't swim due to fear. In fact, it would probably be doubly "liberating" for the likes of me if I tried it. You may have planted a powerful seed Pighead.

boardinwork · 19-05-2009 05:10PM

How come Pighead only has 3 stars under his name with 7,210 posts? Just wondering!

Captain-America · 19-05-2009 05:14PM

I'm pretty sure Libertas don't endorse skinnydipping, no.

Turd Ferguson · 19-05-2009 05:15PM

Quazzie wrote: »

I went skinny dipping after a niteclub years ago in Youghal. Dis it feel liberating? Sure. Did my todger shrivel to 1/15th its normal size with the cold? Definitely.

Anybody can whip it out and be proud in a watrm pub Pighead. Letting it loose in a cold sea may have different results.

I didnt think they could get smaller than what was inside the atom...I was wrong

OldGoat · 19-05-2009 05:17PM

Abigayle wrote: »

*filthy eyes*

Come baby. Join our dirty sexy cult.

Tomorrow perhaps. Tomorow is Wednesday right? I'm going for a swim down Bull Island tonight.

Pighead · 19-05-2009 05:18PM

Quentin Famous Fridge wrote: »

It's pronounced "Wesht."

You are correct in your assumption about westerners, their rustic ways and our close proximities to clean beaches (I'm off for a walk on the beach soon). Unfortunately, I'm an exception to that stereotype. While all the other hairy, manly children were out playing in the nude on the beaches, I was at home being rotund, derided and jokingly offered a spare bra from my mother.

The prospect of seeing me on the beach would also lead to a rise (apart from "in the ocean ho ho ho") in playing those familiar childhood games "Let's drown the fat kid" or "Let's make the fat kid eat sand."

Therefore, I've never skinny dipped and I can't swim due to fear. In fact, it would probably be doubly "liberating" for the likes of me if I tried it. You may have planted a powerful seed Pighead.

Hmmmm, nothing wrong with a bit of extra girth Quentin Famous Fridge. Pighead's Uncle Chubby Charlie is of the larger persuasion and he's very popular with the ladies.

Maybe you should go skinnydipping and liberate yourself from this countries judgemental shackles. And if Alexander Rybak the Norwegian Eurovision Winner is nearby he can sing in the background:

I'm in love with a hairy male,
even though, he's got girth,
I don't care if he's big and round,
I'm already cursed.

Do it Quentin Famous Fridge. Do it now.

Professey Chin · 19-05-2009 05:19PM

Done it here up the Comeragh mountains in the middle of the day while sober. It indeed was refreshing.

I must also admit this was followed up with naked aerobics and dancing on the edge of the waterfall.The breeze felt good on my balls

Agamemnon · 19-05-2009 05:20PM

Quazzie wrote: »

I went skinny dipping after a niteclub years ago in Youghal.

Great place for it when the weather's good. I've done it a few times post-club and it's very refreshing. Once a bunch of us were skinny dipping and we decided to walk to another part of the beach, still naked. This meant taking a short cut beside a road and, sure enough, a Garda car pulled up beside us. I ended up trying to explain what was happening to the two guards, who stayed in their car so their heads were at the level of my crotch. They were essentially talking to my dick. They were going to take our names but then they burst out laughing and told us to get dressed and go home (they weren't laughing at my knob, BTW, and if they were it's because I was cold).

4zn76tysfajdxp · 19-05-2009 05:20PM

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

I didnt think they could get smaller than what was inside the atom...I was wrong

Indeed it barely couldn't. Afterwards, the post-dip expansion was so dramatic it led to a big bang which created a new universe like at the end of Akira.

It didn't make a single sound, apart from three words: "I am...Quazzie."

4zn76tysfajdxp · 19-05-2009 05:22PM

Pighead wrote: »

Do it Frada. Do it now.

I would but there are kids at the beach. Being made fun of is one thing but a membership on the Sex Offenders Register is something I would prefer to avoid altogether.

Evolute · 19-05-2009 05:25PM

Skinnydipping is good crack man you should try it.
I dont think its liberating its good fun and you get to see some bewbs too.
Tis a good holiday laugh.
Yes Ive done it in this country down in Brittas bay but I was hammered and about 14 so not like the cold mattered much to me.

Pighead · 19-05-2009 05:30PM

Evolute wrote: »

Skinnydipping is good crack man you should try it.
I dont think its liberating its good fun and you get to see some bewbs too.
Tis a good holiday laugh.
Yes Ive done it in this country down in Brittas bay but I was hammered and about 14 so not like the cold mattered much to me.

Pighead is in the priveleged position of being able to see "bewbs" whenever he likes. Magazines are great.

Anyway back to the liberating aspect of it all. Are you lot talking about a specific liberation or something more general. Like are you talking specifically about the feeling of taking off your underpants and running along in the nip as your two meat and veg sway freely in the wind? Because if you are, can you not do that in the comfort of your own bedroom?

FlutterinBantam · 19-05-2009 06:17PM

The feeling of letting the cluster swing freely in the breeze and letting the ball oil dry in the salty zephyrs is somewhat overridden by the annoyance of removing deposits of sand from the rim of your nob.

I can assure Pighead that this is an issue, if you don't want a crusty irritated flange two to three days later:mad:

dny123456 · 19-05-2009 06:50PM

I've done it a good bit... liberating yes, but like the best drugs, the effects tend to ware off :-(

Proly wouldn't do it in Ireland again. Too cold!

Boom_Bap · 19-05-2009 06:56PM

i'm skinny dipping at the moment...except i'm not in water.....well, i'm just naked on my couch with the curtains open. I dont feel liberated, just a little chilly.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 19-05-2009 06:59PM

Pighead wrote: »

Pigheads surprised that a man from the West like you hasn't skinnydipped before Frada. The men over that side of the country tend to be rustic and at one with nature and you also have the Atlantic Sellafield free waters on your doorstep which is a luxury us Easties can only dream of.

Why have you never skinnydipped? Are you like Pighead and fail to see the point of it all?

The men in the west are even more prudish than Pighead - ffs most of them wear shorts in the shower in case they have an evil thought or look down by accident.

And, no - that Norwegian song was NOT the best song ever.

Kiera · 19-05-2009 07:03PM

Only did it semi. It was the middle of Feb so all the girls were allowed leave their bra and knickers on. Well those who were wearing bras and knickers. You could have hung you coat on them

Pighead · 19-05-2009 07:12PM

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

The feeling of letting the cluster swing freely in the breeze and letting the ball oil dry in the salty zephyrs is somewhat overridden by the annoyance of removing deposits of sand from the rim of your nob.

I can assure Pighead that this is an issue, if you don't want a crusty irritated flange two to three days later:mad:

Exactly Flutter. Who on earth would invite such hardship upon themselves. If People wanted granular material composed of finely divided particles to liase with their privates, why don't they just dip their mickeys into a sugarbowl? It's all a nonsense.

daithimac · 19-05-2009 07:25PM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

i'm skinny dipping at the moment...except i'm not in water.....well, i'm just naked on my couch with the curtains open. I dont feel liberated, just a little chilly.

Jaysus:eek: I better get the childer in

I've been skinny dipping alright, Got me into a right spot of bother!

Just as well I never was to fond of mosney

Skinnydipping. Is it liberating?

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