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How far would you go to get your hole?

24

Comments

  • #32
    Fighting Irish
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,062 ✭✭✭Fighting Irish


    You must be new to the game, that story was didn't even register on the "Getting Your Hole" scale
    SoWatchaWant wrote: »
    This happened a couple weeks ago, and I thought it went pretty well, considering how hair-brained the scheme was.

    I met a German girl on a Friday, and we got on really well. We met again Saturday afternoon and we spent the day together, and she went out with her mates for the Saturday night, while I was with mine. She texted me up near closing time and said,

    "Hey Sowatchawant, is there any room in your house?"

    Awesome. It's her last night here in Dublin, and I'm in with a sure thing, more or less. Only problem is, I live with my parents, and they wouldn't stand for that sort of thing with a girl they don't know in their house. But I didn't let that stop me!

    So, I left my mates with a cunning plan. I brought her home and walked in the door with her. My parents were in bed, but awake. I have to walk by their door to get to my room, so they called me in, as they heard us walk up the stairs.

    They said, "Have you got someone with you?"

    And I say, "Yeah, it's my mate Owen, he's a bit locked, he's sleeping in my room tonight"

    "Oh, that's grand, Sowatchawant. Good night! Love ya!"

    And that was that! Locked the door, and the rest of the night looked after itself!

    Got any stories yourselves?:)


  • #33
    Kinetic^
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,224 ✭✭✭✭Kinetic^


    Abigayle wrote: »
    True. But cant beat the real thing.

    Tell it to Rihanna!!!!!!


  • #34
    Latchy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Hole your horses , I'm on the way gal ...cock 'n ' dole on da way ... giddyup.. yaaaaaaaa ! :p


  • #35
    Galvasean
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    I don't go far. As they say, if ya can't keep it in yer pants you might as well keep it in the family.


  • #36
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    Kinetic^ wrote: »
    Tell it to Rihanna!!!!!!

    *snigger*

    I would have thought she'd have more fight in her tbh.


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  • #37
    Latchy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Galvasean wrote: »
    I don't go far. As they say, if ya can't keep it in yer pants you might as well keep it in the family.
    :eek:


  • #38
    Rory123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 601 ✭✭✭Rory123


    SoWatchaWant wrote: »
    This happened a couple weeks ago, and I thought it went pretty well, considering how hair-brained the scheme was...
    That wasn't hair-brained or a scheme. Why didn't you go back to where she was staying to ride her?... Surely she was staying at a hotel or some sort of accomodation?
    It is impossible to have sex and not be heard so, congratulations, your parents now think you were banging Owen. HA!

    I have a sneaking suspicion you just posted this to boast about getting a jump, guess what some people get jumps all the time. Save it for you buddies down the back of your market research lecture. It will be high fives all round. ;)


  • #39
    Jimdagym
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,844 ✭✭✭Jimdagym


    Rory123 wrote: »
    That wasn't hair-brained or a scheme. Why didn't you go back to where she was staying to ride her?... Surely she was staying at a hotel or some sort of accomodation?
    It is impossible to have sex and not be heard so, congratulations, your parents now think you were banging Owen. HA!

    I have a sneaking suspicion you just posted this to boast about getting a jump, guess what some people get jumps all the time. Save it for you buddies down the back of your market research lecture. It will be high fives all round. ;)

    He he, burn.


  • #40
    Valmont
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,857 ✭✭✭Valmont


    I was at a house party years ago and there was this girl who I figured I'd have a chance with so I approached her and she asked me to go outside for a cigarette. I don't smoke at all but I thought I would just this once in the name of sex. She was tricky to talk into it, but I eventually got her in the sack but only after I'd shared a 20 pack of marlboro's with her over two hours while we "talked" outside. It wasn't worth it at all, I got a rotten chest infection as a result and lost my voice too. Smoking is bad. Even when sex is involved.


  • #41
    Rabies
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,257 ✭✭✭✭Rabies


    SoWatchaWant wrote: »
    I guess, but it's the furthest I've gone.

    ...if it isn't that far, you got one to tell, in that case? Entertain us:D

    My drunken rambles are well know here and what I've been at.

    But those stories are all hidden away from you :p


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  • #42
    Galvasean
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    latchyco wrote: »
    :eek:

    Don't worry, I used a rubber. :rolleyes:


  • #43
    Local-womanizer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,798 ✭✭✭Local-womanizer


    OP,in fairness that is not too far to go for the hole.

    Ever heard of an alley.Shift a doll,say "here,do ya wanna go up this alley for a shag?"

    Job done in front of a few hundred people and a number of Garda.

    Telling fibs to your parents isent all that bad tbh.....


  • #44
    Nappy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 329 ✭✭Nappy


    went back to hostel with dutch bird, and couldnt use room cuz friend was in there so banged on in hostel hallway and communal showers.. was fantastic..


  • #45
    Valmont
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,857 ✭✭✭Valmont


    Nappy wrote: »
    went back to hostel with dutch bird, and couldnt use room cuz friend was in there so banged on in hostel hallway and communal showers.. was fantastic..

    Replace Dutch with Columbian and banged with handjob and we have had very similar experience!


  • #46
    Tech3
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,010 ✭✭✭Tech3


    3 hours of driving up the road to get mine usually every fortnight, dam traffic jams.


  • #47
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    Mossy Monk wrote: »
    You got laid. Bravo.

    I may havr quptred some one bi acciedcnt there. Im vert drunk so i dont care, anywatoy OP what agr are u? 13 ha!

    Im drunk by the wey.


  • #48
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    loser


  • #49
    Tech3
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,010 ✭✭✭Tech3


    FearDark wrote: »
    I may havr quptred some one bi acciedcnt there. Im vert drunk so i dont care, anywatoy OP what agr are u? 13 ha!

    Im drunk by the wey.

    judging by your typing no sh*t


  • #50
    falipo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 281 ✭✭falipo


    FearDark wrote: »
    I may havr quptred some one bi acciedcnt there. Im vert drunk so i dont care, anywatoy OP what agr are u? 13 ha!

    Im drunk by the wey.


    Just wow....


  • #51
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,217 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    I want to go to Japan for sex.. or some asian country, like Vietnam.... nyom nyom nyom :)


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  • #52
    flyton5
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,106 ✭✭✭flyton5


    About two years ago when I was interrailing I got it into my head that I was gonna shag some bird in a hostel in Krakow. She was 34 and I was 19 but I figured I could pull it off. Long story short...I got her wasted and she gave in(even though she knew she'd have to demean herself by shagging in a bunk). Now I'm pretty sure I rode into battle bareback(never got around to the STI check but meh). So if anyone knows a 36 year old named Marie from Melbourne with a young child could they maybe let me know? Also OP, congratulations on shagging owen or whoever, you're a man now.


  • #53
    blinding
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,462 ✭✭✭blinding


    Rabies wrote: »
    this is going far
    http://www.3news.co.nz/German-tourist-elaborates-on-internet-disaster-date/tabid/209/articleID/91431/cat/409/Default.aspx?ArticleID=91431
    Is this not how all internet men get girlfriends!!


  • #54
    Adiboo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,629 ✭✭✭Adiboo


    Aspen Rich Vigilance wrote: »
    I want to go to Japan for sex.. or some asian country, like Vietnam.... nyom nyom nyom :)

    I had sex in Japan. Good times:)


  • #55
    Overheal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,683 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    i wouldnt even drive the car out the garage to get my hole when she asked. i was uninsured unlicensed and unexperienced wanting me to drive 5 miles down a 6 lane highway at night....damn i shouldaa just done it. oh well. i probably would have crashed with the raging boner from how excited i would have gotten from going to all that trouble.


  • #56
    samhail
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,699 ✭✭✭samhail


    with the topic "how far would you go to get your hole" and you starting off your post mentioning a german girl, mapcrow.info tells us that its about 850mi from dublin to germany... i was like Germany is pretty far to go.

    sorry... but u ending up going to... your bedroom is a fail in my books.


  • #57
    Sleipnir
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,513 ✭✭✭Sleipnir


    Overheal wrote: »
    i wouldnt even drive the car out the garage to get my hole when she asked. i was uninsured unlicensed and unexperienced wanting me to drive 5 miles down a 6 lane highway at night....damn i shouldaa just done it. oh well. i probably would have crashed with the raging boner from how excited i would have gotten from going to all that trouble.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/mediaselector/ondemand/comedy/partridge/ram/kmky_s1ep2?bgc=000000&nbram=1&lang=en&nbwm=1&bbram=1&ms3=6&ms_javascript=true&bbcws=1&size=4x3&bbwm=1


  • #58
    MarkR
    Moderators, Regional Midwest Moderators Posts: 11,315 Mod ✭✭✭✭MarkR


    Well jigsaw would go to galway on a stolen mountainbike. Or something clever like that.


  • #59
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Abigayle wrote: »
    *snigger*

    I would have thought she'd have more fight in her tbh.

    Seriously abigayle, you're laughing at a woman getting beaten up?


  • #60
    Armin_Tamzarian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭Armin_Tamzarian


    midlandsmissus wrote: »
    Seriously abigayle, you're laughing at a woman getting beaten up?

    +1
    Seriously not funny...


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  • #61
    irish_bob
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,271 ✭✭✭irish_bob


    to quote jonah hill from the movie super bad

    no , im not willing to die for beer but i am willing to die for pussy


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