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What useare cats

  • 15-02-2009 08:10PM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭


    I can't think of any use for the horrible furry yokes except for ...


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,461 ✭✭✭Queen-Mise


    As a certain australian singer (Kevin bloody wilson) used to sing -

    The fcuking cats back, the fcuking cats, i stuck my foot up its bum and kicked it till kingdom come. the fcuking cat's back, the fcuking cats back.

    And so on, and so forth.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    They offer neither milk nor meat.


    They are cuddly though, anyone disputing this can meet me around the back of the nest in five minutes, choose your weapon wisely.

    [edit]:



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    Meat, mmm, i spose they might be nice barbecued, after stroking them a lot to lull them into a false sense of security.

    Cat ribs in a tangy lime sauce anyone ?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 163 ✭✭tangerinepuppet


    Oh come on! We're never more than a couple of feet away from a rat! At least feeding a stray cat to keep it around the outside of your house keeps those dirty feckers at bay.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    We've got a wild one made its home in the barn, can't get near it, so to stroke it I'd have to shoot it first, maybe I could cook it the hedgehog way wrap it in clay put it in the fire, and when its cooked the clay will pull away the fur


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 9,982 ✭✭✭445279.ie


    Totally agree - hate cats :mad:

    kittens are cute though :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    [QUOTE

    kittens are cute though :)[/QUOTE]

    speshully s e x kittens eh


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 11,744 Mod ✭✭✭✭Hermy


    Without cats there'd be no lolcats.

    Genealogy Forum Mod



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,509 ✭✭✭✭randylonghorn


    Oh, c'mon ... there's nothing like making a pussy purr ... >_>


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    Thats my boy, but you is confused we're talking about those flea ridden, asthma inducing, 4 legged dog teasers


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  • Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    octopussyzw4.jpg


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 31,204 ✭✭✭✭Ghost Train


    CleoCATraposter.jpg


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    Keep thison topic pleze .... What Use Are Cats ????


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,513 ✭✭✭Sleipnir


    colrow wrote: »
    I can't think of any use for the horrible furry yokes except for ...

    Shoes, handbags, emergency rations...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    I wonder if they'd be any good for plugging a leak in sinking boat ?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,160 ✭✭✭✭banshee_bones


    Cats are great pets, cuddly and loveable, they keep rats away. And stroking a cat or dog for 20 minutes or so has been shown to reduce blood pressure.
    Therefore pets such as cats have a theraputic affect.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    There is also more than one way to skin a cat.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,160 ✭✭✭✭banshee_bones


    Rhyme wrote: »
    There is also more than one way to skin a cat.


    yeah? speaking from experience are you! :eek:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    There's this little tab where the tail meets the spine that if you pull hard enou-


    ...I've said too much.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,160 ✭✭✭✭banshee_bones


    Rhyme wrote: »
    There's this little tab where the tail meets the spine that if you pull hard enou-


    ...I've said too much.




    :eek: x 1,000


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    Okay you got me, even i flinched at the thought of tearing the skin from an innocent kitty, curing the thin hide and fashioning it into a stylish doublet to be worn to soireés.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,160 ✭✭✭✭banshee_bones




  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,495 ✭✭✭Mr. Presentable


    Turn em inside out for a nice muff.
    Use the intestine as a condom.
    Nailed inside the front door they make a very good intrusion detector


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    catcatcatcatcatkitten.png

    Super-serious.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    Some old boys in Cornwall used to swear by hanging a dead cat over their favourite fishing spot, for a week or two, the maggots that dropped out as a drip feed, got plenty of fish interested.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,141 ✭✭✭colrow


    Cats are great pets, cuddly and loveable, they keep rats away. And stroking a cat or dog for 20 minutes or so has been shown to reduce blood pressure.
    Therefore pets such as cats have a theraputic affect.

    Anyone offering to let me stroke their pussy for an hour or two ?:)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,160 ✭✭✭✭banshee_bones


    colrow wrote: »
    Anyone offering to let me stroke their pussy for an hour or two ?:)



    FAIL.




    EPIC FAIL!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,706 ✭✭✭Matt Holck


    colrow wrote: »
    I wonder if they'd be any good for plugging a leak in sinking boat ?

    Nope



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 355 ✭✭purplegeko


    Cats can make us laugh though as Jimmy Car suggested ...


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    Captain Mog and his four peg-paws.


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