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Would the world be a more peaceful place if Jesus was alive today?

  • 10-02-2009 1:22am
    #1
    the_syco
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37,305 ✭✭✭✭


    If Jesus was alive today would the world be a morepeaceful] place?

    Would the world be a more peaceful place if Jesus was alive today? 78 votes

    Yes
    0%
    No
    15%
    jimmycrackcormtowel401NewFrockTuesdayLockstepClare BearJimboSRFC90twinytworaah!QuazzieMorrisseeeemilly4ever 12 votes
    Praise hell Satan
    84%
    Mossy MonkednwirelandRuu_OlddreginPompey MagnusSeiferKingp35User45701hairyhereticunkleroscoPyr0Ciaran500BlackWizardWillymuncherwhatawasterwhiskeymanm5ex9oqjawdg2iTurd Fergusonsinkcastie 66 votes
    Tagged:


«1

Comments

  • #2
    Kiera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭Kiera


    Praise hell Satan
    Have you seen him? He's weedy looking! No way he could save the world!


  • #3
    Rb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,277 ✭✭✭✭Rb


    Erm, probably. Simply because, if he were alive today and with the knowledge and technology we have now, he would have been outed as merely (if anything) a magician and a cult leader who preyed on the weak. Christianity would collapse and probably take a few other mainstream western religions with it, and we'd avoid all the war and blood shed that religion has, and will, bring to this world.

    Oh and before someone claims that the collapse of Christianity and/or faith would lead to a collapse in moral value and therefore chaos, please don't bother.


  • #4
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,331 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Praise hell Satan
    Heck no, he'd skin the lot of us....


  • #5
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,331 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Praise hell Satan
    Kiera wrote: »
    Have you seen him? He's weedy looking! No way he could save the world!

    but he's got Superpowers, tbh he wouldn't be much use in Ireland unless he's got Superpockets...


  • #6
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    Praise hell Satan
    Jeasus saves!!!


















    ...at the AIB!


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  • #7
    Kiera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭Kiera


    Praise hell Satan
    drunkmonkey wrote: »
    but he's got Superpowers, tbh he wouldn't be much use in Ireland unless he's got Superpockets...
    The only superpower he has is to turn water into wine. Cant really save the world with that?


  • #8
    Lirange
    Registered Users Posts: 2,108 ✭✭✭Lirange


    Praise hell Satan
    The world wasn't a very peaceful place in his day why would it be now?


  • #9
    jester77
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    He probably wouldn't get nailed to a cross if he was around today!


  • #10
    the_syco
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37,305 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    But on the day of his resurrection he showed that he was the one true zombie lord Lord Jeasus Christ!


  • #11
    Rb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,277 ✭✭✭✭Rb


    He wouldn't be able to compete in Vegas, would end up out on the streets and die drunk in the gutter freezing his little middle eastern arse off.


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  • #12
    Sharpshooter
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31,859 ✭✭✭✭Sharpshooter


    Kiera wrote: »
    The only superpower he has is to turn water into wine. Cant really save the world with that?
    And wine not???

    / whiner...:p


  • #13
    Rb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,277 ✭✭✭✭Rb


    jester77 wrote: »
    He probably wouldn't get nailed to a cross if he was around today!

    Nah, sure they've much better tools over in guantanamo :pac:


  • #14
    Sharpshooter
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31,859 ✭✭✭✭Sharpshooter


    jester77 wrote: »
    He probably wouldn't get nailed to a cross if he was around today!
    Dead right , the Americans would send Jack Bauer to annihilate him.:cool:


  • #15
    jester77
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2T1LIrzsgqA


  • #16
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,331 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Praise hell Satan
    Kiera wrote: »
    The only superpower he has is to turn water into wine. Cant really save the world with that?

    he could save me:D


  • #17
    Fizman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,605 ✭✭✭Fizman


    Praise hell Satan
    Jesus is alive. I was talkin to him on the CB.


  • #18
    eVeNtInE
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,020 ✭✭✭eVeNtInE


    This post has been deleted.


  • #19
    The_Minister
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,255 ✭✭✭✭The_Minister


    Wussy-Green-Liberal-Pinko activists would have to find something new to blame war on.:pac:


  • #20
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,331 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Praise hell Satan
    The_Minister wrote: »
    Wussy-Green-Liberal-Pinko activists would have to find something new to blame war on.:pac:

    they'd probably start picking on drugs again:pac:


  • #21
    Overblood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,359 ✭✭✭Overblood


    What do you mean alive today? As in being STILL alive all these 2000 years? Or do you mean like magically born in a stable in Offaly somewhere in 1970. I'd say he'd be locked the f*ck up. And anyone who follwed his preachings would be locked up too. For good reason too, linky.


    edit: what the feck is he doing wearing the crown jewels? Where did he get them?!?!


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  • #22
    Sharpshooter
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31,859 ✭✭✭✭Sharpshooter


    Fizman wrote: »
    Jesus is alive. I was talkin to him on the CB.

    Are you sure that wasn't the BC.:p

    /Going now .............
    / before the AC gets here..


  • #23
    doonothing
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,745 ✭✭✭doonothing


    Kiera wrote: »
    The only superpower he has is to turn water into wine. Cant really save the world with that?

    Is that a joke?

    :)


  • #24
    KnifeWRENCH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    Nah one Jesus wouldn't be enough.

    An army of Jesuses might do the trick.


  • #25
    jimmycrackcorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,345 ✭✭✭✭jimmycrackcorm


    No
    More elbow room in heaven for me seeing as all you no-voters aren't going there.


  • #26
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Praise hell Satan
    Biggins wrote: »
    Jeasus saves!!!
    Jeasus, He must be a Dubliner :pac:
    Not on my Pension, he doesn't*





    *Alf Garnett (1987)


  • #27
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Praise hell Satan
    Bob Geldof would be pissed off!!!


  • #28
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    Praise hell Satan
    jimmycrackcorm wrote: »
    More elbow room in heaven for me seeing as all you no-voters aren't going there.


    .................................................................................................................:rolleyes:


  • #29
    SoupyNorman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,257 ✭✭✭SoupyNorman


    With all that Gold, Frankincense and Muir he'd probably be pursued by the Criminal Assets Bureau.


  • #30
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Praise hell Satan
    bravestarr082 wrote: »
    With all that Gold, Frankincense and Muir he'd probably be pursued by the Criminal Assets Bureau.

    Shure, it was just resting in his (dodgy Irish Bank) account, along with his communion money.


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  • #31
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,221 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    Praise hell Satan
    No, he could potentialy do the complete opposite :)


  • #32
    Pride Fighter
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,729 ✭✭✭Pride Fighter


    Praise hell Satan
    the_syco wrote: »
    If Jesus was alive today would the world be a morepeaceful] place?

    Jesus is alive today, his name is Chuck Norris.


  • #33
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Praise hell Satan
    Margot Rancid Ceremony wrote: »
    No, he could potentialy do the complete opposite :)

    He'd certainly give non-christian activists a target to aim at.


  • #34
    Call Me Jimmy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,449 ✭✭✭Call Me Jimmy


    Oh yea! More mindless chuck norris slash the hoff crap please! I actually don't think it's even within the realms of possibility that it might get old.


  • #35
    SoupyNorman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,257 ✭✭✭SoupyNorman


    Pride Fighter wrote: »
    Jesus is alive today, his name is Chuck Norris.


    No, Jesus is not alive today...nor was he alive yesterday, nor was Jesus ever alive. Jesus is a very impressive product of fiction that has managed to net the Catholic Club billions and when we die we will be as aware of our conscience as an earthworm.



    Chuck Norris is an immortal however.


  • #36
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,335 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    What was all that talk about Jesus chasing the vendors out of church? I can just imagine what he would say about his B-day being turned into one of the biggest commercial ($) holidays in the west? Would he be mad, or get an solicitor to file a suit to collect on 2000 years of royalty rights?:D


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  • #37
    Call Me Jimmy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,449 ✭✭✭Call Me Jimmy


    bravestarr082 wrote: »
    Chuck Norris is an immortal however.

    love it.


  • #38
    IvySlayer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,190 ✭✭✭✭IvySlayer


    Jesus is coming!

    funny_jesus_9.gif


  • #39
    Húrin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,045 ✭✭✭Húrin


    Praise hell Satan
    I don't think so. Following Jesus as friend, lord and saviour can make peace, but merely observing him cannot.


  • #40
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    Praise hell Satan
    Plus he might not care to be stared at...


  • #41
    Ruu_Old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Praise hell Satan
    He'd probably be on one of those Christian channels on Sky pretending to heal people. :mad:


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  • #42
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    Praise hell Satan
    Actually,

    Started off small, became big, was crucified, then disappeared, only to reappear once more....With rumours of him one day returning for good?

    ....Is Michael Lynn Jesus....?


  • #43
    Loomis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,692 ✭✭✭Loomis


    Praise hell Satan
    Religion: the biggest cause of conflict since time began.
    If he were alive it would be no different. People would fight saying they believe it's him and others would say it's not. Notably the guy in white coats locking him in an asylum after some lunatic puts his hand in the air and says "I'm back."


  • #44
    Caoimhín
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,789 ✭✭✭Caoimhín


    He would be sent packing to the nut house. Going around in robes claiming to have created the world and asking for the little children to come to him...


  • #45
    General Zod
    Registered Users Posts: 2,661 ✭✭✭General Zod


    Important information must be determined.

    Are we talking about Joshua ben-Joseph, the actual guy who lived and walked on the earth and rebelled against the prevailing social norms of his time, preaching love for everyone, or the supersayan Jesus Christ who Christianity invented?


  • #46
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    He is around and the world is still fucked up, so I would have to say no.


  • #47
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Praise hell Satan
    He's alive and well and currently looking to rent somewhere.

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=58886447&postcount=111


  • #48
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    TheZohan wrote: »
    He's alive and well and currently looking to rent somewhere.

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=58886447&postcount=111

    In fairness, it's about time. Living in heaven with your da for 2000+ years is weird.


  • #49
    Mark200
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,536 ✭✭✭Mark200


    Rb wrote: »
    Erm, probably. Simply because, if he were alive today and with the knowledge and technology we have now, he would have been outed as merely (if anything) a magician and a cult leader who preyed on the weak. Christianity would collapse and probably take a few other mainstream western religions with it, and we'd avoid all the war and blood shed that religion has, and will, bring to this world.

    Oh and before someone claims that the collapse of Christianity and/or faith would lead to a collapse in moral value and therefore chaos, please don't bother.

    People will always find a reason to kill each other. If it's not over religion, then it'll be over who is the better atheist or who grows the nicest flowers in their front garden. The death of religion won't be the death of many of the wars, they'll still happen but under a different label.


  • #50
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Praise hell Satan
    Caoimhín wrote: »
    He would be sent packing to the nut house. Going around in robes claiming to have created the world and asking for the little children to come to him...
    You've just made him sound like Gary Glitter. :pac:


  • #51
    Wagon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,119 ✭✭✭Wagon


    Praise hell Satan
    I think there's be a lot more trouble for him. Imagine that poor bastard stopping for a session in Whelans? Orders a few waters and turns them into wine and gets thrown out for performing a miracle that wasn't purchased at the bar...


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