Need an excuse for not going into work on Friday

amcalester · 01-02-2009 09:54PM #1

I didnt go into work on Friday and didnt call either, going in in the morning and will need an excuse.

Any ideas?

gino85 · 01-02-2009 09:55PM

chronic diarrhea, tell them you were to embarresed to call in

dr.bollocko · 01-02-2009 09:56PM

Family emergency and your mobile was dead. Say you called all weekend.
Sorted.

amcalester · 01-02-2009 09:57PM

I dont thinkI could say that with a straight face but its the best I've got so far.

tony1kenobi · 01-02-2009 09:57PM

Tell them they are all fired.

Gordon · 01-02-2009 09:58PM

Why didn't you call?!

amcalester · 01-02-2009 09:58PM

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Family emergency and your mobile was dead. Say you called all weekend.
Sorted.

I was thinking that, I actually did break my phone on Thursday night thats why I didnt ring but I live in London and the family's in Ireland. I suppose I could say i went home thursday night and just got back.

FlutterinBantam · 01-02-2009 09:58PM

With so many people losing their jobs, I would suggest you be a little more responsible,and stop acting the prick

orestes · 01-02-2009 09:59PM

Say your grandmother has died.

If you aren't comfortable with lying about that kind of thing, kill your grandmother.

Valmont · 01-02-2009 09:59PM

Tell them in a very sombre voice that you had to attend a funeral, this way they will be apologizing to you. I always use this one but I've used up all my grandparents and I think my boss is starting to wonder how large my extended family really is...

Fizman · 01-02-2009 09:59PM

Tell them that you genuinely forgot that you had a job to go to when you woke up on friday. But you remembered while having drinks over the weekend when one of your mates asked how was work.

Failing that, tell your boss you were at his place with his wife.

marcsignal · 01-02-2009 10:00PM

just go in with your hands up and say you were on the piss on thursday night and didn't wake uptil 5 the next day. if you have a reasonable boss they'll appreciate your honesty. worst they can say is 'don't do it again'

spoonbadger · 01-02-2009 10:00PM

Tell 'em you mistook your vit C tablets for some viagra.

This is definitely a good idea.

4zn76tysfajdxp · 01-02-2009 10:01PM

marcsignal wrote: »

worst they can say is 'don't do it again'

That or "you're fired."

Highsider · 01-02-2009 10:02PM

Tell them you where in the hospital because one of your testicles had doubled in size due to an infection and you forgot your phone when you rushed into the E.R. They'll actually feel sorry for you. Worked for me years ago when i was one sicky away from being sacked

jester77 · 01-02-2009 10:04PM

Just say you are not being paid enough to work 5 days a week!

4zn76tysfajdxp · 01-02-2009 10:04PM

Highsider wrote: »

Tell them you where in the hospital because one of your testicles had doubled in size due to an infection and you forgot your phone when you rushed into the E.R. They'll actually feel sorry for you. Worked for me years ago when i was one sicky away from being sacked

*Snigger*

timmywex · 01-02-2009 10:05PM

Go in and try and claim you had told them you were taking the day off. sorted

tony1kenobi · 01-02-2009 10:05PM

orestes wrote: »

Say your grandmother has died.

If you aren't comfortable with lying about that kind of thing, kill your grandmother.

If they see through that tell them your bird had a miscarriage....it worked for Stephen Ireland.

Don't say you were at a funeral. Someone had to be dead 3 days for that so you would have known in advance.

Say you had your drink spiked.

mickos · 01-02-2009 10:08PM

Just say nothin. If you work as hard as I do they probably didn't notice you weren't there;)

Biggins · 01-02-2009 10:09PM

Tell them your in mourning. The Irish economy has died.

Hell -the whole country is in mourning at the death of our economy, so it won't exactly be a lie!

chin_grin · 01-02-2009 10:10PM

Since you broke the third rule of Sickies ("Thou shalt not ring in on a Monday or Friday") I've very little sympathy as these days are flagged given that either results in a long weekend, and a raised eyebrow from HR. They know full well.

But if you did want to at least be in with a chance, I'd say your safest bet is food poisoning. It's too vague and you don't need a doctors cert. I mean no one is going to want proof of your violent puking and explosive bouts of diarrhea are they?

amcalester · 01-02-2009 10:11PM

jester77 wrote: »

Just say you are not being paid enough to work 5 days a week!

Thats genius, I'd love to use it. Think I might go with the spiked drink if asked though I might just pretend I was there on Friday and see how far through the day I get.

Quazzie · 01-02-2009 10:12PM

Tell them you were raped and were in the pigsty all friday morning making statements and they told you that you couldn't make any calls except to your lawyer.

Remember kids, Rape is always the answer!!

spoonbadger · 01-02-2009 10:15PM

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

Tell them you were raped and were in the pigsty all friday morning making statements and they told you that you couldn't make any calls except to your lawyer.

Remember kids, Rape is always the answer!!

No, rape is the question!!.

The answer is yes :pac:.

amcalester · 01-02-2009 10:15PM

chin_grin wrote: »

Since you broke the third rule of Sickies ("Thou shalt not ring in on a Monday or Friday") I've very little sympathy as these days are flagged given that either results in a long weekend, and a raised eyebrow from HR. They know full well.

But if you did want to at least be in with a chance, I'd say your safest bet is food poisoning. It's too vague and you don't need a doctors cert. I mean no one is going to want proof of your violent puking and explosive bouts of diarrhea are they?

I'm half ways through a 6 month contract so I'm not too worried about HR just want something to tell them to keep them happy for now.

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 01-02-2009 10:20PM

tony1kenobi wrote: »

If they see through that tell them your bird had a miscarriage....it worked for Stephen Ireland.

Eh... no. It didn't...

FebruaryFuhrer · 01-02-2009 10:22PM

Oh, don't be silly :pac: say you did ring. Tell them you rang and spoke to [insert applicable name from the company] and when (or if) they go to the person to confirm it, sure it's your word against theirs!

Option B is say that you rang before the place opened and left a voicemail for [appropiate person]. Blame the machine if anyone says the message wasn't recieved.

4zn76tysfajdxp · 01-02-2009 10:22PM

amcalester wrote: »

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Saying that your drink was spiked sounds really far-fetched. They'll never believe it.

Maybe you should throw yourself down the stairs and tell them you were assaulted.

chin_grin · 01-02-2009 10:25PM

amcalester wrote: »

I'm half ways through a 6 month contract so I'm not too worried about HR just want something to tell them to keep them happy for now.

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Well don't take my advice then!

But I assure you that this is automatically "flagged" (their term) by HR as a sickie.

And there you go breaking yet another rule. You make the excuse as cheap and cheerful as you can. Less is more. Food poisoning is less as it implies that you were sick in bed all day rushing to and fro to the jacks. Two words instead of an elaborate plot.

When giving a lot of detail you end up discrediting yourself as you have to back that up with another "fact" and another and it just snowballs. They can catch you out. (Probably will if you don't make eye contact when giving your story.....).

orestes · 01-02-2009 10:26PM

Dexter Sharp Greyhound wrote: »

Maybe you should throw yourself down the stairs and tell them you were assaulted.

Again, if you aren't comfortable with lying, a few of us could assault you if you like?

Need an excuse for not going into work on Friday

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