Need an excuse for not going into work on Friday

amcalester

I didnt go into work on Friday and didnt call either, going in in the morning and will need an excuse.

Any ideas?

gino85

chronic diarrhea, tell them you were to embarresed to call in

dr.bollocko

Family emergency and your mobile was dead. Say you called all weekend.
Sorted.

amcalester

I dont thinkI could say that with a straight face but its the best I've got so far.

tony1kenobi

Tell them they are all fired.

Gordon

Why didn't you call?!

amcalester

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Family emergency and your mobile was dead. Say you called all weekend.
Sorted.

I was thinking that, I actually did break my phone on Thursday night thats why I didnt ring but I live in London and the family's in Ireland. I suppose I could say i went home thursday night and just got back.

FlutterinBantam

With so many people losing their jobs, I would suggest you be a little more responsible,and stop acting the prick

orestes

Say your grandmother has died.

If you aren't comfortable with lying about that kind of thing, kill your grandmother.

Valmont

Tell them in a very sombre voice that you had to attend a funeral, this way they will be apologizing to you. I always use this one but I've used up all my grandparents and I think my boss is starting to wonder how large my extended family really is...

Fizman

Tell them that you genuinely forgot that you had a job to go to when you woke up on friday. But you remembered while having drinks over the weekend when one of your mates asked how was work.

Failing that, tell your boss you were at his place with his wife.

marcsignal

just go in with your hands up and say you were on the piss on thursday night and didn't wake uptil 5 the next day. if you have a reasonable boss they'll appreciate your honesty. worst they can say is 'don't do it again'

spoonbadger

Tell 'em you mistook your vit C tablets for some viagra.

This is definitely a good idea.

4zn76tysfajdxp

marcsignal wrote: »

worst they can say is 'don't do it again'

That or "you're fired."

Highsider

Tell them you where in the hospital because one of your testicles had doubled in size due to an infection and you forgot your phone when you rushed into the E.R. They'll actually feel sorry for you. Worked for me years ago when i was one sicky away from being sacked

jester77

Just say you are not being paid enough to work 5 days a week!

4zn76tysfajdxp

Highsider wrote: »

Tell them you where in the hospital because one of your testicles had doubled in size due to an infection and you forgot your phone when you rushed into the E.R. They'll actually feel sorry for you. Worked for me years ago when i was one sicky away from being sacked

*Snigger*

timmywex

Go in and try and claim you had told them you were taking the day off. sorted

tony1kenobi

orestes wrote: »

Say your grandmother has died.

If you aren't comfortable with lying about that kind of thing, kill your grandmother.

If they see through that tell them your bird had a miscarriage....it worked for Stephen Ireland.

Don't say you were at a funeral. Someone had to be dead 3 days for that so you would have known in advance.

Say you had your drink spiked.

mickos

Just say nothin. If you work as hard as I do they probably didn't notice you weren't there;)

Biggins

Tell them your in mourning. The Irish economy has died.

Hell -the whole country is in mourning at the death of our economy, so it won't exactly be a lie!

chin_grin

Since you broke the third rule of Sickies ("Thou shalt not ring in on a Monday or Friday") I've very little sympathy as these days are flagged given that either results in a long weekend, and a raised eyebrow from HR. They know full well.

But if you did want to at least be in with a chance, I'd say your safest bet is food poisoning. It's too vague and you don't need a doctors cert. I mean no one is going to want proof of your violent puking and explosive bouts of diarrhea are they?

amcalester

jester77 wrote: »

Just say you are not being paid enough to work 5 days a week!

Thats genius, I'd love to use it. Think I might go with the spiked drink if asked though I might just pretend I was there on Friday and see how far through the day I get.

Quazzie

Tell them you were raped and were in the pigsty all friday morning making statements and they told you that you couldn't make any calls except to your lawyer.

Remember kids, Rape is always the answer!!

spoonbadger

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

Tell them you were raped and were in the pigsty all friday morning making statements and they told you that you couldn't make any calls except to your lawyer.

Remember kids, Rape is always the answer!!

No, rape is the question!!.


The answer is yes :pac:.

amcalester

chin_grin wrote: »

Since you broke the third rule of Sickies ("Thou shalt not ring in on a Monday or Friday") I've very little sympathy as these days are flagged given that either results in a long weekend, and a raised eyebrow from HR. They know full well.

But if you did want to at least be in with a chance, I'd say your safest bet is food poisoning. It's too vague and you don't need a doctors cert. I mean no one is going to want proof of your violent puking and explosive bouts of diarrhea are they?

I'm half ways through a 6 month contract so I'm not too worried about HR just want something to tell them to keep them happy for now.

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

tony1kenobi wrote: »

If they see through that tell them your bird had a miscarriage....it worked for Stephen Ireland.

Eh... no. It didn't...

FebruaryFuhrer

Oh, don't be silly :pac: say you did ring. Tell them you rang and spoke to [insert applicable name from the company] and when (or if) they go to the person to confirm it, sure it's your word against theirs!

Option B is say that you rang before the place opened and left a voicemail for [appropiate person]. Blame the machine if anyone says the message wasn't recieved.

4zn76tysfajdxp

amcalester wrote: »

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Saying that your drink was spiked sounds really far-fetched. They'll never believe it.

Maybe you should throw yourself down the stairs and tell them you were assaulted.

chin_grin

amcalester wrote: »

I'm half ways through a 6 month contract so I'm not too worried about HR just want something to tell them to keep them happy for now.

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Well don't take my advice then! But I assure you that this is automatically "flagged" (their term) by HR as a sickie.

And there you go breaking yet another rule. You make the excuse as cheap and cheerful as you can. Less is more. Food poisoning is less as it implies that you were sick in bed all day rushing to and fro to the jacks. Two words instead of an elaborate plot.

When giving a lot of detail you end up discrediting yourself as you have to back that up with another "fact" and another and it just snowballs. They can catch you out. (Probably will if you don't make eye contact when giving your story.....).

orestes

Dexter Sharp Greyhound wrote: »

Maybe you should throw yourself down the stairs and tell them you were assaulted.

Again, if you aren't comfortable with lying, a few of us could assault you if you like?

4zn76tysfajdxp

orestes wrote: »

Again, if you aren't comfortable with lying, a few of us could sexually assault you if you like?

FYP.

Tell them you were in Portugal looking for Maddie

orestes

Or you could combine both ideas and a few of us could assault your grandmother?

Valmont

amcalester wrote: »

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Haha what an elaborate story.

Last week in my workplace a girl came in at 9 and was told she had been rostered for 12 so she went home and at 11.30 rang saying she was sick:D

amcalester

amcalester wrote: »

I'm half was through a 6 month contract so I'm not too worried about HR just want something to tell them to keep them happy for now.

I'm thinking spiked drink and then fell as a result and broke my fone. I even have the broken fone to show for it.

Phone.


And you don't need an excuse... When the boss says "where were you on Friday?" simply reply with "Where were you on friday?" and walk off, tapping your nose with your index finger. He'll get confused and leave you alone.

amcalester

orestes wrote: »

Again, if you aren't comfortable with lying, a few of us could assault you if you like?

Thats very kind of you, but I think I'll pass.

orestes

amcalester wrote: »

Thats very kind of you, but I think I'll pass.

So we have a go on the grandmother assault then?

Helix

say you thought it was saturday for some crazy reason

AlmightyCushion

Just be honest and tell your boss you couldn't be arsed going in to work. He/she may admire your honesty. If they don't just make a complaint to HR that your boss sexually harrassed you. Problem solved.

MizzLolly

I'll abuse you if you want..but it's gona cost you. :cool:

thebman

One of the guys in work (who doesn't work there anymore) came up with this gem.

"My fridge broke at the weekend so I had to use everything in it. I drank a litre of milk and I think it was bad because it had chunks in it. I've been throwing up all morning and won't make it in".

the bolt

boss not on boards you hope:D

ronano

just don't ever go in again

amcalester

ronano wrote: »

just don't ever go in again

thought about it, I really hate the work. If I thought I could get something quickly I'd just quit.

ronano

you took what was an attempt at a humorous responce and turned it serious this is after hours!

im sorry man working somewhere you dislike/kills you is the worst,stay out tomorrow and the next day and go to doctor for cert

Professey Chin

MizzLolly wrote: »

I'll abuse you if you want..but it's gona cost you. :cool:

True.She isnt cheap but its worth it

MagicMarker

Tell them that you didn't have the balls to ring in sick and your mother wasn't around to do it for you.

donmaga1

You could use the same excuse Chris Rock said in a live DVD. "MY AIDS WAS ACTING UP"

gino85

tell them you were suffering from ''man'' problems

kittensoft1984

marcsignal wrote: »

just go in with your hands up and say you were on the piss on thursday night and didn't wake uptil 5 the next day. if you have a reasonable boss they'll appreciate your honesty. worst they can say is 'don't do it again'

Or they will sack you!