BRGH in crisis - a Public Service Announcement

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 10:46AM #1

Assembled Brethren, Brotherettes and wimmins, dark times are upon us. Our way of life is under threat, the cornerstone of our very existence is being cruelly taken from us, through no fault of our own.

We are simple people, we don't ask for much. Yet, as we speak, the Dark Forces of the FSAI are conspiring to take from us the very essence of our existence - pork products.

:eek:

According to their statement they "hope to have pork products back in the shops by Christmas". :eek:

We will monitor the situation closely, and keep the Strike Force on standby, should they be needed. In the meantime, I am looking for inspiration as to where we should turn to.

All I ask is that you stay calm and don't go vegetarian on me.

Gary ITR · 07-12-2008 10:52AM

I'm dividing up the rashers I have in the fridge and freezing them. I can defrost as needed

Ghost Train · 07-12-2008 11:36AM

I think the FSAI are telling porkies

Pepe LeFrits · 07-12-2008 11:44AM

Meh, just means more steak from now on.

Daemonic · 07-12-2008 11:58AM

From the FSAI:
Should consumers be concerned?

Even though it is illegal for dioxins to be present in foodstuffs, any possible risk to consumer health is extremely low.

I'll take my chances :rolleyes:

monkeyfudge · 07-12-2008 12:07PM

Personally I think I'd notice if there was a PCB in my sausage.

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 12:38PM

Daemonic wrote: »

I'll take my chances :rolleyes:

Work with me here, will you?

Ghost Train · 07-12-2008 12:52PM

any one seen pighead?

has he gone to ground

trout · 07-12-2008 12:54PM

eolhc wrote: »

any one seen pighead?

has he gone to ground

Steve · 07-12-2008 12:56PM

Are those rashers in your avatar brother trout?

Lord help us all!

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 01:01PM

SteveC wrote: »

Are those rashers in your avatar brother trout?

Lord help us all!

I knew it! He hasn't been looking well of late, that explains it.

Now we know you can OD on pork products.

trout · 07-12-2008 01:10PM

Pork Recall - This is Serious Business!

*goes off to change avatar*

smashey · 07-12-2008 01:33PM

Pffft. I just bought some good old British bacon up North.

I will not be denied my rasher sambos. :cool:

Zaph · 07-12-2008 01:36PM

M&S sell British and Danish pork products, don't they? Maybe all is not yet lost?

Galvasean · 07-12-2008 01:42PM

Feh, apparently this thing has been in them since September. I've eaten my fair share of pigs since then and there's nothing wrong with me.

*cough*

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 01:43PM

Zaph wrote: »

M&S sell British and Danish pork products, don't they? Maybe all is not yet lost?

Oh noes, in these recessionary times, do we, as in BGRH, recommend foreign products or do we practice abstinence?

My heart is saying abstain, my stomach is saying f**k that, I'm starving.

I'm torn.

smashey · 07-12-2008 01:45PM

Tom Dunne wrote: »

do we practice abstinence?

You have to be drunk to make a statement like that. :eek:

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 01:48PM

smashey wrote: »

You have to be drunk to make a statement like that. :eek:

Who says I am not?

It's five o'clock somewhere.

Our man in Havana · 07-12-2008 01:55PM

smashey wrote: »

Pffft. I just bought some good old British bacon up North.

I will not be denied my rasher sambos. :cool:

+1

My freezer is full of Norn Iron sausages and asda rashers.

Daemonic · 07-12-2008 02:07PM

Tom Dunne wrote: »

Work with me here, will you?

The :rolleyes: was for the FSAI. All this panic and the risk is minimal...its mad cow disease/saars/bird flu all over again

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 02:11PM

Daemonic wrote: »

The :rolleyes: was for the FSAI.

Ah, the classic misinterpretation of an expression on a text-based medium, such as Boards.ie. Apologies, I thought you were undermining my level of concern for my fellow brethren.

Daemonic wrote: »

All this panic and the risk is minimal...its mad cow disease/saars/bird flu all over again

Don't even go there with mad cow disease and bird flu. Just don't. I couldn't cope.

I couldn't live on just fish, I really couldn't.

dr.bollocko · 07-12-2008 02:42PM

There's British pork in LIDL! I overheard the rumour from a bewildered and put-upon housewife (bless 'em) in Dunnes. I never moved so fast in my life.

Woke up this morning and took a brief glance at the news. Then realised that the entire world is conspiring to ruin my sunday fry. I nearly fell off the toilet seat.
Back off Brussels!!!

Through a close sharing of information re. outlets stocking available pork resources we may yet get through this crisis.
Lord help us all. I have a lovely pork loin in the fridge. Was going to make some casserole today. Now it just sits there, the beautiful loin rolled into a smirking smile in the fridge. Safe in the knowledge that it will never fulfil its raison d'etre.

Actually I am going to go and stab that loin for a while.

Robbo · 07-12-2008 02:45PM

First the Credit Crunch and now the Bacon Bite. We live in horrendous times.

Doctor DooM · 07-12-2008 03:24PM

The creatures of the night pledge their assistance in this time of great hardship for the brotherhood. We feel your pain for there is nothing like a nice, greasy fry up after a 28 hour boards and Ps3 binge over night.

Rasher stealin bastids!

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 03:35PM

SDooM wrote: »

The creatures of the night pledge their assistance in this time of great hardship for the brotherhood. We feel your pain for there is nothing like a nice, greasy fry up after a 28 hour boards and Ps3 binge over night.

Thank you, Young SDoom. It's good to know we have your support in these dark times.

No chance you will be ritually slaughtering a few pigs some night will you?

Or maybe a wild boar?

Doctor DooM · 07-12-2008 03:38PM

Tom Dunne wrote: »

Thank you, Young SDoom. It's good to know we have your support in these dark times.

No chance you will be ritually slaughtering a few pigs some night will you?

Or maybe a wild boar?

I'll see what I can do. Generally we go for goats these days, but I will see what we have in the dungeon!

Galvasean · 07-12-2008 03:39PM

Daemonic wrote: »

The :rolleyes: was for the FSAI. All this panic and the risk is minimal...its mad cow disease/saars/bird flu all over again

Bird flu indeed. You can't catch the flu eating something which has been deep fat fried.

Tom Dunne wrote: »

Thank you, Young SDoom. It's good to know we have your support in these dark times.

Oh no you didn't..

Shiminay · 07-12-2008 03:39PM

Yea, I had a packet of yummy tesco quality saussages in the fridge earmarked for Sunday Afternoon eatings and no, they've had to be relinquished to the grave of consumer panic.

Now is the time for the Nocturnals and BGRHers to put aside any previous petty squabbles and unite in a hunt for clean pigs that we may feast as the gods intended!

Nevyn · 07-12-2008 03:42PM

THere are beef, goat and chicken sausages brothers fear not.

Nerin · 07-12-2008 03:44PM

SDooM wrote: »

I'll see what I can do. Generally we go for goats these days, but I will see what we have in the dungeon!

But sheep are easier to catch,they follow on blind faith

I pledge half my hunts to the bgrh brothers

Tom Dunne · 07-12-2008 03:47PM

Thank you all for your kind words. It makes it a tiny bit easier knowing you are all there for The Brethren during The Bacon Bite.

BRGH in crisis - a Public Service Announcement

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