Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married.....

Jack Sheehan · 15-10-2008 06:26PM

If the person I was getting married to wanted to I guess I would.

Cmol · 15-10-2008 07:35PM

Nope, I'd feel like a hypocrite if I got married in a church!

If / When I get married it will be at home which means I can get married wherever I please... backyard, beach etc!

Plus, I'm not baptised so I'm fairly sure that rules me out of the church wedding anyway?!

15-10-2008 07:38PM

Like many here, I was raised Catholic, but if I were to enter a church now after being away for so long, it would probably fall on me! But a hotel wedding seems so commercially cold; the same for going to some official bloke's office to tie the knot...burrrrrrrrr! A garden wedding might have its appeal, if it ever stops raining in Ireland and the sun debuts at the right moment. Oh, I know! How about getting married on a ship right in the middle of a sword fight, just like in Pirates III? That way you can be prepared to voyage future domestic quarrels? On guard hubby!

rainbow kirby · 15-10-2008 07:39PM

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

How about getting married on a ship right in the middle of a sword fight, just like in Pirates III? That way you can be prepared to voyage future domestic quarrels? On guard hubby!

That would be awesome.

15-10-2008 07:55PM

If i ever decide to it will most certainly NOT be in a church

Nevyn · 15-10-2008 08:12PM

oleras wrote: »

Do you mind me asking if both of your children went to a catholic school ? And if they did, did you exclude them from religion class ? And communion prep ?

They are, they get to do art and crafts or have library time when the rest of the class have R.E. and don't have to do any R.E. related homework.

dotsman · 15-10-2008 08:53PM

Besides weddings and funerals, haven't been inside a church in 10 years.

That said, I wouldn't be opposed to getting married in a church. Everything about marriage is tradition. Take away the tradition, and it's merely a tax/inheritance contract.

Caliden · 15-10-2008 09:01PM

dotsman wrote: »

Besides weddings and funerals, haven't been inside a church in 10 years.

That said, I wouldn't be opposed to getting married in a church. Everything about marriage is tradition. Take away the tradition, and it's merely a tax/inheritance contract.

nail -> head

matrim · 15-10-2008 09:01PM

Moonbaby wrote: »

That an entirely different situation, these rituals are a language that allows you to convey your sympathy to those left behind.
Your opinion on them is irrelevant in this circumstance.
What is the point of being disrespectful at that time, I mean it wasn't like they were asking you to sacrifice a goat.

It's not respect if you bitch about it both before and afterwards. I show my sympathy in my own way, not by chanting about something I don't believe in for 20 minutes.

matrim · 15-10-2008 09:06PM

Thaedydal wrote: »

They are, they get to do art and crafts or have library time when the rest of the class have R.E. and don't have to do any R.E. related homework.

Is the R.E class in that school a veiled way of teaching catholicism or general R.E class? If it's just a general R.E class that teaches about all religions would it not be better to let them into the class to learn about what different people believe?

If it's the veiled way of teaching catholicism I'd do the same and try to keep my kids out of the class.

15-10-2008 09:16PM

Ok, first off, I'm going to ask the dumbest blond question EVER - but I honestly don't know the answer so I apologise in advance......

Where do atheists have funerals?

anyway, back on thread, I got married in a church, we both wanted to just because we thought we should and didn't want our parents/grandparents to have heart attacks, also, we may not both love god, but we both believe in god (am I going straight to hell now??). Had we been allowed to do it in a hotel back then, maybe that would have been an option. However, I am not in any way opposed to civil ceremonies, they make more sense if you're going to feel uncomfortable promising god this and that, my only issue with them is that they're over so quickly but then again, it's about the act itself, not how long it takes!

15-10-2008 09:24PM

matrim wrote: »

It's not respect if you bitch about it both before and afterwards. I show my sympathy in my own way, not by chanting about something I don't believe in for 20 minutes.

The people who are grieveing don't hear the bitching, but they see your protest. That is the difference.
Why should your beliefs and way impact on someone elses method of grieving.
It is a very self-centered attitude if you ask me.

Wurly · 15-10-2008 10:06PM

I wanna get married on a grassy hilltop. Somewhere warm, no shoes and a simple dress. One sunflower in hand. Buffet of tasty treats and 3 or 4 bands on throughout the day.

Don't believe in god. I don't want it religiousy at all. Just a ceremony of sorts. Don't want 'frills' either. It's the people there that matters.

/tear.

Crash · 15-10-2008 10:29PM

On the funerals point of view, I've interacted in all parts of a catholic funeral despite no longer identifying myself in any way as catholic. Why? Not as a sign of respect for the deceased, but because in many cases its a sign of comfort for those who the deceased hsa left behind. As for those who bitch about it before and after, they're just idiots. Either go along with it or don't, but don't turn around and say you only did it because you had to. No one has to do anything, suck it up.

As for the wedding thing, i'd say my current gf would definitely want a church wedding. I wouldnt be opposed to it. I'm not Catholic, but at the same time there are a lot worse places to profess your love for each other than a beautiful old building. If I can find somewhere prettier, thats where i'd go

Earthhorse · 15-10-2008 11:06PM

Paint it whatever way you like, fact is, the church still run a lot of schools in this country and you might find yourself in a situation where you have no non-denominational school nearby. If getting married in a church is part of a charade to fix that for your child then so be it.

Personally, I would try not to but if it meant enough to my fiancé, and I did not find her church an offensive one, I would go along with it.

Moonbaby wrote: »

But I'm not having meat at my wedding, because it is contrary to the esscense of my being, to celebrate my life with slaughter.

So no drinking either then?

Moonbaby wrote: »

It is a very self-centered attitude if you ask me.

It's self centred to be bitching about the ritual being "stupid" at a time like that too. And hypocritical if you partake it in after.

hot2def · 15-10-2008 11:20PM

partyatmygaff wrote: »

church for religious reasons because i believe in God and think atheism is just something that people do to give them an excuse to do as they like

funny, I think religion is just something that people do to give them an excuse not to think about what is actually right and wrong. snap

partyatmygaff · 15-10-2008 11:49PM

Why is it that one insane/drunk/rebel or whatever says "God doesnt exist guys, its all a bunch of crap" EVERYBODY just jumps on the bandwagon and follows what they say without even thinking.

Not trying to force anyone to believe in christianity but whats so bad and wrong with being a christian? Just because 1 person doesnt believe in it doesnt mean they're right.

hot2def · 15-10-2008 11:54PM

just because some people believe in it with conviction doesn't make it true either.

there's nothing wrong with being a christian, go for it, I don't care. you were the one running your mouth about how atheists were making the non-existence of god up so they could misbehave....

Photi · 16-10-2008 12:02AM

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Why is it that one insane/drunk/carpenter or whatever says "God's my dad guys, its true" EVERYBODY just jumps on the bandwagon and follows what he says without even thinking.

Fixed, thx

Manic Moran · 16-10-2008 12:04AM

I'm not religious, I did the church thing. Partially because I'm a bit of a traditionalist, but mainly because my family are more religious than I am. We're putting on a show for them as much as for us (after all, they flew 5,000 miles for it!), so they might as well feel satisfied.

NTM

16-10-2008 12:27AM

This post has been deleted.

Epic Tissue · 16-10-2008 01:00AM

I'm not religious at all but if I get married to a woman who wants to get married in a church then I will. A lot of it is to do with conformity. At the moment, most people expect couples to get married in the church. That's the only way to "marry", isn't it? It's also to do with keeping the family happy and in my opinion, very much to do with the actual image of a wedding people have been brought up with.

KnifeWRENCH · 16-10-2008 01:03AM

I'm not an athiest but I'm not too fond of the Catholic Church either. If I ever get married, it will probably be in a church but the location really wouldn't trouble me. I'd still be in shock that someone was desparate enough to settle down with me!

Dragan · 16-10-2008 09:32AM

The Scientist wrote: »

I couldn't see myself marrying outside of a church tbh...

Unless i was marrying a horse in Vegas pissed or something.

But dammit man, you believe in Science!

Malari · 16-10-2008 10:00AM

Many people have mentioned that they would do the church wedding to keep family members happy. I'm just wondering is this something that you've spoken to your parents/grandparents about or is it just a feeling? Do you think if you did bring it up that they would listen to you and respect your views?

thelordofcheese · 16-10-2008 10:05AM

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Why is it that one insane/drunk/rebel or whatever says "God doesnt exist guys, its all a bunch of crap" EVERYBODY just jumps on the bandwagon and follows what they say without even thinking.

As a wise man once said

"Man's unfailing capacity to believe what he prefers to be true rather than what the evidence shows to be likely and possible has always astounded me. We long for a caring Universe which will save us from our childish mistakes, and in the face of mountains of evidence to the contrary we will pin all our hopes on the slimmest of doubts. God has not been proven not to exist, therefore he must exist"

Dudess · 16-10-2008 10:08AM

partyatmygaff wrote: »

church for religious reasons because i believe in God and think atheism is just something that people do to give them an excuse to do as they like

Ah... I see you edited out the "to make them look cool" bit.
Or... people might be atheist because they think of things like Hurricane Katrina, the Tsunami, kids dying of leukaemia (not to mention the Holocaust and other genocides but those were apparently due to "free will") and think "there's no way God would allow those things to happen... therefore there just can't be a god".

Caliden wrote: »

Fair play non-conformists. Enjoy getting married in a manky looking govt building

I'd say people are more concerned about not being hypocrites rather than being non conformist
It's better than being a hypocritical "catholic" who has sex before marriage and uses contraception.

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Why is it that one insane/drunk/rebel or whatever says "God doesnt exist guys, its all a bunch of crap" EVERYBODY just jumps on the bandwagon and follows what they say without even thinking.

LOL - of course you'd have to be drunk/insane/a rebel to consider the notion of god - or at least a kind, loving god - utter arse...

Dragan · 16-10-2008 10:24AM

Dudess wrote: »

Ah... I see you edited out the "to make them look cool" bit.
Or... people might be atheist because they think of things like Hurricane Katrina, the Tsunami, kids dying of leukaemia (not to mention the Holocaust and other genocides but those were apparently due to "free will") and think "there's no way God would allow those things to happen... therefore there just can't be a god".

Personally I have a different view. I honestly do not care what Higher Power exists, or how he/she/it created the Universe if that is what happened. I believe that responsibility travels up and down the chain. I believe that if you create something then you have a responsibility to ensure that your creation is looked after and loved. When parents have a child I believe they have a certain onus to ensure the safety and the healthiness and the happiness of that child. In return that child believes in the honesty and truth and love of it’s parents.

I guess I am Agnostic, I will not say that a higher power does not exist, but if it does, as one of it's children then I certainly have a bone to pick with it. Whatever it is has shirked it's responsibilities and ignored it's children.

I also believe, as Terry Pratchett of all people so expertly pointed out, that just because something exists does not mean I have to believe in it. God could appear to me right now, offer me absolute and total proof of his existance, what am I to do? Fall on my knees and Worship his name? I don't ****ing think so. You earn your respect, you earn your loyalties.

I will live a good life, I will treat people well and I will continue to help my friends and family and strangers who need it and who I can help at that time. If a Deity would hold it against me that I did not accept them are the true God then **** them, I don't want to believe in that type of thing anyway.

16-10-2008 10:33AM

Earthhorse wrote: »

So no drinking either then?

It's self centred to be bitching about the ritual being "stupid" at a time like that too. And hypocritical if you partake it in after.

I should have said animal slaughter. I'm hoping to placate the masses with free booze.

I don't care who is being a self involved nimcompoop. If anyone insulted my grieving process. They'd be put on the top of the list in permanent pen.

ROCKMAN · 16-10-2008 10:34AM

Right , just booked the hotel for my own wedding next year . We are doing the lot in the hotel . We are going down the Wedding Party route , Civil ceremony and a bit of grub for family and close/good friends followed by piss up for all the degenerates we know .

We will not be going near any religion / churches for two reasons ,
1 We are of mixed religious backgrounds , which creates a nightmare when dealing with respective religions.
2 This is my biggest problem , To get married in the church we must attend and pass a marriage course ,wait for it ,run my priests .
Now what the fook does a priest know about married life and Why the fook should someone who has been living with their partner for 7 years and who has 2 wonderful kids need permission from them and their little cult in the first place.

Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married.....

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