Who Are You!?

Here's a very detail'less example:

Dev stormed through the hallway, eyes and nostrils flaring.
After his brief encounter with the newcomer, his patience and tolerance had been drained to the point where simple conversation was impossible - and he now needed something to quench his vastly growing frustration. There seemed to be two valid options.

He could either seek out and verbally destroy a perfectly innocent bystander in the hope of gaining some satisfaction, or try to find a local bar and drink his emotions to oblivion. Being a god with morals, the first option was not available to him, unless of course he could find a means to get drunk first. That way, there was always a valid excuse for undertaking such devastating actions.

There didn’t seem to be any around, so the last option would be to take the elevator up to the rooftop and report this mess to Cloud Nine. After finally finding one, he jabbed the button angrily. The doors opened and he strolled in to the sight of a large, oval shaped room, half of which was comprised of an immensely large bar that lined the far wall. This was pretty strange for the inside of an elevator! The doors slid to a close behind him and it certainly felt as if the room was escalating. If Dev was going to question the logic behind this phenomenon, he may as well do so with a few drinks in him. The Boarder was a HUGE place, and the ride up to the rooftop was more than likely going to be a long one anyway - And what better way to spend the journey than in a barely explainable, illogical, multidimensional elevator bar.
There were two people in the elevator also - one of the occupants was the barkeeper, the other being a slumped over figure of a man who had the look of someone well traveled. This particular person seemed to be violently punching a banjo whilst muttering various obscenities under his breath, which were thankfully drowned out by the banjo’s sounds of protest. With little care for either person, Dev strutted to the bar, pulled up a seat and bellowed at the barkeeper for a pint.

Every time he had taken on physical form in order to visit The Boarder, something rather peculiar and, in most cases, annoying happened. It had been a considerably long time since his last proper visit, and he had been quite looking forward to it – That was until he had been assaulted by the newcomer down in the Portal Room, who was screaming something along the lines of “ololololormflmao, you equels faeg!”
This had been putting a dampener on Dev’s day, and he gained no satisfaction from smashing the newcomer 12 times over the head with his PUMA (Pink Umbrella of Much Administration) with which the screaming bloke was banished back to wherever it came from. Even the Trolls weren’t as bad as whoever that thing was, and this was worrying. Since The Boarder had came into existence, it was well known that if the Trolls, or even the N00b, had worked together as a group, they might have manage to become a minor or mildly aggravating problem for the gods, yet this one small encounter with the stranger had more than annoyed Dev. For a start, how the hell did such a vile specimen get into The Boarder?

The Semi-God’s train of thought was halted at the sight of a large pint glass being expertly placed in front of him by a slender hand. The Semi-God watched as various bubbles spiraled from the base of his pint to the surface, where they went *BOK*. That’s what this place is like, he thought, you start at the bottom and work your way up, quietly – You don’t just walk in and start bleating!
Finally, his vision was diverted from the dancing bubbles to that of the bartender, with which he downgraded from infuriated to shocked on realizing a few small details.

There were two very distinct things that all of The Boarders inhabitants were very fond of. Alcohol seemed to be one of them, and the other was a member of the opposite sex. The Boarder, for some strange reason, didn’t house many females, and to encounter one was regarded as a fantastic spectacle, yet to come across one that actually sold alcohol would generally be regarded as a gift from heaven. This particular female was patiently buffing up a small glass and eyeing up the Semi-God with calm, yet somewhat threatening eyes.
Dev tried to speak, but could only manage “ugnkh-?”
The Barkeeper placed the glass behind the counter, and randomly grasped another, which she proceeded to clean, vigorously. “What?” she asked, her vision warily fixed on the stammering Semi-God.
Dev tried to focus his energies on rearranging his vocal chords.
“Erm, hello!” he stammered, “Nice place you got here!”
“ 'Madgie Ebdems Mobile Embibing Emporium' to be exact, and don’t go doing anything drastic! I don’t know what you gods get up to on your little rooftop, but I want none of it here. This is a peaceful place, and I’d like to keep it that way!”
There was an ascending, jovial and plucky sound from the corner of the room, as the slumped man hit a chord on his banjo.
“Ooh I is much liking this, yes, yes!”
“Shut Up Bard”, screamed Madge. The Bard obediently complied, and continued assaulting his Banjo.
Dev looked her up and down, then left to right. She looked harmless but, judging by those piercing eyes, she more than likely had something very un-harmless under the bar. It didn’t take long for Dev to realize that it would be best to focus on his pint.

Oh and don't forget yer weapons of choice...
I think MADJ won't complain if her character uses lumps of lighted tissue stuck into the end of a thrown bottle of "Jock Daneels"?

Sorry to inform you guys, but the elevator and Madges Ebdidmsa;dam, thingy belongs to her now, and there shall be no more staff other than Madge herself, and her hardcore customer, Bard.

If you want to think up other locations (Like Gordon's bakery, which isn't a bad idea - Mind altering Pie's bought in order to give the eater the illusion that everything is dandio) then feel free to do so.

This apartment block is HUGE, so if you want a location give me your feedback. Moderators are the leaders of said offices, so it would be a lot better if mods would give me locations based on their respective board... Land of Gee for me, and my character is in two minds about his co-office worker (DrAkE) which will lead to some rather ridiculous plots and stuffs.

For Bard NOT to be a Bard defeats the purpose of the story - All people are going to be something that will, to boards readers at least, make them go "Ahhh yes, of course..." - Bard = Bard, Admins = Gods etc

And Yes you'll all see it once it's done - Im doing it for Boards anyway!

Ghosts are too lame tbh, unless you want to be a Wraith?