Dating websites

deebee08 · 11-07-2008 01:49PM #1

I have a question....does anyone believe that all these dating websites really work?? Or are they just full of weirdos? I joined one recently and was sceptical to start with but am seriously starting to lose faith here!! :rolleyes:

dr.bollocko · 11-07-2008 01:49PM

ma?

LadyE · 11-07-2008 01:51PM

I dunno...have never tried tbh

deebee08 · 11-07-2008 01:54PM

dr.bollocko wrote: »

ma?

no it's not ur ma!! :eek::D

Aspiration · 11-07-2008 01:56PM

My housemates friend tried maybefriends.com and she went on 2 dates. The first guy was nice but there was nothing there. The second guy she's going out with now.

I suppose it eliminates the whole "friends first" scenario and goes straight to the point.

I've never tried it though tbh, but it does seem to work for some people. Best of luck!

Sherifu · 11-07-2008 02:00PM

deebee08 wrote: »

I have a question....does anyone believe that all these dating websites really work?? Or are they just full of weirdos? I joined one recently and was sceptical to start with but am seriously starting to lose faith here!! :rolleyes:

Sounds good, what happened?

deebee08 · 11-07-2008 02:03PM

Sherifu wrote: »

Sounds good, what happened?

As I said in my first post, they're just weirdos!! Havent actually gone on a date with any but that's because from the brief converstions with any of them, they're not people I'd like to go on a date with!

Are there any nice normal guys out there who arent in a relationship/married/gay??????

BubbleWrap85 · 11-07-2008 02:05PM

I'm on one and whilst there are a few weirdos on there [no more than you'd meet in the pub though!] there are some genuine people also. It does eliminate the whole awkward part because you both are there [supposedly] for dates and the likes, but some are just looking for someone to hang out with, others looking for "an activity partner" [whatever that means

] and others are looking for longterm. Can I ask what site you joined? I'm on okcupid.

faceman · 11-07-2008 02:07PM

There are weirdos in the pub, in the supermarkets, in the queue in front and behind you.

So i imagine it all evens out.

then again, maybe the Op is a weirdo! :eek:

deebee08 · 11-07-2008 02:08PM

BubbleWrap85 wrote: »

others looking for "an activity partner" [whatever that means ]

There's a first..never heard that before!!

and others are looking for longterm. Can I ask what site you joined? I'm on okcupid.

I joined MSN's match.com website, dont think I'll be paying for another months membership with them tho!

Steve_o · 11-07-2008 02:16PM

Never tried it tbh, but can't see how there would be a high success rate with them!

jasonb · 11-07-2008 02:16PM

I used Maybefriends a few years ago, found it quite good to be honest.

There are people you don't get on with everywhere in life, and dating sites have their fair share. There are also a lot of genuine, nice people on those sites as well.

As someone who doesn't drink, I found using a dating site a lot more helpful for me then going to a pub, drinking a lot of coke, hoping to meet someone who wouldn't get so drunk that they'd forget me the next day...

As with everything, you get out of it what you put into it. I'd give any site a couple of months at least, if you find that there's no-one you're clicking with at all, then maybe that site isn't for you. I got quite a few dates out of MaybeFriends and while I consider myself a decent bloke, I'm no-one's dream guy!

As already said, one advantage with dating sites is that you know where you stand ( if you and the other person are genuine ) and if you seem to click online by swapping messages etc. then the next logical step is a date. If there are just no sparks there when you meet, you're both able to say 'nah, sorry, it's just not there'. Another advantage of course is that you only go out on dates with people that you already think you might click with based on your message / chats with each other, so there's more chance of the date being successful.

Just my 2c worth...

J.

BubbleWrap85 · 11-07-2008 02:19PM

jasonb wrote: »

I used Maybefriends a few years ago, found it quite good to be honest.

There are people you don't get on with everywhere in life, and dating sites have their fair share. There are also a lot of genuine, nice people on those sites as well.

As someone who doesn't drink, I found using a dating site a lot more helpful for me then going to a pub, drinking a lot of coke, hoping to meet someone who wouldn't get so drunk that they'd forget me the next day...

As with everything, you get out of it what you put into it. I'd give any site a couple of months at least, if you find that there's no-one you're clicking with at all, then maybe that site isn't for you. I got quite a few dates out of MaybeFriends and while I consider myself a decent bloke, I'm no-one's dream guy!

As already said, one advantage with dating sites is that you know where you stand ( if you and the other person are genuine ) and if you seem to click online by swapping messages etc. then the next logical step is a date. If there are just no sparks there when you meet, you're both able to say 'nah, sorry, it's just not there'. Another advantage of course is that you only go out on dates with people that you already think you might click with based on your message / chats with each other, so there's more chance of the date being successful.

Just my 2c worth...

J.

I agree with you. You can tell by chatting to someone whether you've any interest or not. You can then progress to texting or phone calls and the likes. And using webcams to ensure there's no mix up about what they look like! I met a nice guy [so I thought] and we really clicked before we met. Met him, we kissed, but he decided he just wanted to be friends after so that was fine with me. He lived too far away anyway. I used to think that it was all weirdos, but I'm not a weirdo [!] and I'm on it so I figured it can't be too bad!!

nocal · 11-07-2008 02:25PM

I think that you do need a bit of a thick skin when using the dating websites. It is so easy to let the weirdos put you off.
The other thing to bear in mind is this whole typing thing - very easy to be mis-understood or to offend someone, whereas if you you were talking to them in real life you might pick up that mischievous glint in their eye.
I have used a few of the sites over the last few years and will probably use them again -just in case there is someone on them for me.

I mean after all, when you have all this - I so should not be single:D

Disco Stu · 11-07-2008 02:26PM

no point paying for one, go on plentyoffish.com its free and then if it doesn't work out you're not out of pocket...

think problem with them, as I have tried it, is that your first impression of someone online and when you actually meet them can be so very different... so becomes very hit and miss although i did meet one really nice girl on it who i was seeing for a while... so you can get lucky with it...!

jasonb · 11-07-2008 02:26PM

You're right, it's good to use the site fully, get to know someone a bit, progress to texts and phonecalls etc. before meeting. It means that when you do meet, you should both know that you've got something in common, and while you might not end up in each other's arms, you should have a nice date at least!

Webcam is a good idea too, or even just swap some decent photos. While it might be terribly shallow, looks are important ( you don't have to be universally recognised as drop dead gorgeous, but it does help if the other person at least thinks you're cute! ). Nine times out of ten when you meet someone for the first time in a pub or whatever, it's how they look that attracted you to them. Dating sites give you a chance to see how they look ( once again assuming everyone's honest with their pics etc. ) as well as getting to know them a bit before you meet up...

J.

deebee08 · 11-07-2008 02:31PM

jasonb wrote: »

You're right, it's good to use the site fully, get to know someone a bit, progress to texts and phonecalls etc. before meeting. It means that when you do meet, you should both know that you've got something in common, and while you might not end up in each other's arms, you should have a nice date at least!

Webcam is a good idea too, or even just swap some decent photos. While it might be terribly shallow, looks are important ( you don't have to be universally recognised as drop dead gorgeous, but it does help if the other person at least thinks you're cute! ). Nine times out of ten when you meet someone for the first time in a pub or whatever, it's how they look that attracted you to them. Dating sites give you a chance to see how they look ( once again assuming everyone's honest with their pics etc. ) as well as getting to know them a bit before you meet up...

J.

Defo agree with you about the looks thing! I'm not a shallow person by any means but there has to be some physical attraction there for something to happen in the first place!! The amount of people on dating websites that dont put up their picture is unreal......I wonder if many of them actually get replies!! :rolleyes:

BubbleWrap85 · 11-07-2008 02:34PM

I wouldnt reply to anyone without a picture. Everyone has ways and means of putting up pictures nowadays and if they dont have at least 2 or 3 pictures up I'd be wary. I'd also want to see them on webcam as I think I'm ok looking in pictures but don't know if that reflects reality! Meeting someone for the first time after talking for a while makes it somewhat easier as you know their humour and can make jokes accordingly!

nocal · 11-07-2008 02:38PM

Personally I have never understood the whole "must put up a picture thing" - sure, definitely exchange pictures before meeting. Best date I ever went on was blind (though she had seen a picture of me) and ended up having a reasonable relationship out of it.

And sure there are people on these sites hiding (from wives or girlfriends) - but it is the same as meeting someone in the pub - you can tell farily easily if they have something to hide or not.

metamorphic · 11-07-2008 02:44PM

Seeing alot of these on here lately, the aul testing the water with dating websites, who's single on boards, lonely workaholics on PI, and as always stated boards.ie isn't a dating website

soo, I reckon we should settle on a dating site that all us boardsie can hit up, maybe put it in your profile somewhere your boards id? not that using this forum makes you any way sane, maybe the opposite. but there's been a lot of skirting around it while trying not to straight out say "hey I'm single, anyone on here interested?"

maybe this should be split off to a seperate thread with a poll? get some sort of consensus. Hope I'm not breaching any boards rules, but dating websites seem to get named directly without any fuss.

BubbleWrap85 · 11-07-2008 02:47PM

metamorphic wrote: »

Seeing alot of these on here lately, the aul testing the water with dating websites, who's single on boards, lonely workaholics on PI, and as always stated boards.ie isn't a dating website

soo, I reckon we should settle on a dating site that all us boardsie can hit up, maybe put it in your profile somewhere your boards id? not that using this forum makes you any way sane, maybe the opposite. but there's been a lot of skirting around it while trying not to straight out say "hey I'm single, anyone on here interested?"

maybe this should be split off to a seperate thread with a poll? get some sort of consensus. Hope I'm not breaching any boards rules, but dating websites seem to get named directly without any fuss.

Okcupid, same boards user id, check

Disco Stu · 11-07-2008 03:08PM

BubbleWrap85 wrote: »

I wouldnt reply to anyone without a picture. Everyone has ways and means of putting up pictures nowadays and if they dont have at least 2 or 3 pictures up I'd be wary. I'd also want to see them on webcam as I think I'm ok looking in pictures but don't know if that reflects reality! Meeting someone for the first time after talking for a while makes it somewhat easier as you know their humour and can make jokes accordingly!

+1

no pic no reply either... no point to be honest...!! Might seem shallow but initially there has to be a physical attraction and then the personality attraction gets added to it...!

getting the two is tough though haha!!

CPT. SURF · 11-07-2008 04:20PM

Surely Myspace or Facebook work better than dating sites? Not that I've tried any of them but at least with the social networking sites you can get a really good feel for what the person might be like before talking to them.

sullivk · 11-07-2008 04:45PM

I'm on plentyoffish, I've mainly come across weirdos or guys looking for teh sex :eek:
However, I have got chatting to a few nice, funny, genuine guys. Haven't met up with anyone as of yet, suppose I'm just a wee bit shy

I think it may work for some but it's not for everyone!

elmyra · 14-07-2008 03:10AM

Disco Stu wrote: »

no point paying for one, go on plentyoffish.com its free and then if it doesn't work out you're not out of pocket...

think problem with them, as I have tried it, is that your first impression of someone online and when you actually meet them can be so very different... so becomes very hit and miss although i did meet one really nice girl on it who i was seeing for a while... so you can get lucky with it...!

Qft. My housemate is dating a guy she met on plentyoffish. They've been seeing each other for a couple of months. He appears pretty normal to me...

truecrippler · 14-07-2008 04:38AM

*Joins dating website*

14-07-2008 04:44AM

So what if the someone you meet is a weirdo, isn't it a story to tell.

BraziliaNZ · 14-07-2008 05:23AM

I would imagine most of the bearded, glasses wearing, pony tail wielding, heavy metal t-shirt sporting, IT working nerds on this website met their American girlfriends online, I'm not sure it works with Irish girls though

hussey · 14-07-2008 05:26AM

If in a pub/club, you get chatted up by some weirdo/d*ckhead,
you usually walk away and call him a weirdo to your friends, but yet, you would have no problem talking chatting to other strangers in pub

on the web you meet a weirdo online and it's "Oh my god this dating site is full of weirdos, I'll never use it again"

14-07-2008 05:30AM

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

I would imagine most of the bearded, glasses wearing, pony tail wielding, heavy metal t-shirt sporting, IT working nerds on this website met their American girlfriends online, I'm not sure it works with Irish girls though

Says the guy who pays for his pleasure.

14-07-2008 05:35AM

Disco Stu wrote: »

no point paying for one, go on plentyoffish.com its free and then if it doesn't work out you're not out of pocket...

I wouldn't really agree in that sense. I believe that if it's free it's bound to be abused by people looking for a laugh whereas if you go on somewhere that charges a fee that should eliminate at least some of the muppets.

Dating websites

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