Stupid Girl WONT SHUT UP...

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:38PM #1

:mad:Ok I work in a big open plan office and there's a girl down the hall who wont shut up, How is it everyone else seems to be able to do their days work and not be heard, but she can't even answer the phone without wreckin everyones head...SHE'S SO F**KIN LOUD!! I need ideas to make it stop, no matter how wacky....

Agent Smith · 19-06-2008 02:40PM

whats she talking about?

Fremen · 19-06-2008 02:41PM

BAM!

...Fork in the eye!

tallaght01 · 19-06-2008 02:41PM

Is he havin one of those "when Harry met Sally" orgasms???

If so, just roll with it, mate.

LouOB · 19-06-2008 02:42PM

say v loudly - does she eva shut up

silvine · 19-06-2008 02:42PM

Stand behind her and start shouting about how you can't get a bit of work done in this place, what with all the noise.

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:42PM

Agent Smith wrote: »

whats she talking about?

Everything from what funny thing her dog did this morning all the way up to Fair City, its gone beyond a joke tbh... very unprofessional... And the annoying thing is none of the managers seem to be doing anything about it...

I'm tempted with the "stand behind her shouting" idea.

jester77 · 19-06-2008 02:43PM

Reverse her left/right mouse buttons, should confuse her for a few hours!

Mossy Monk · 19-06-2008 02:45PM

Steve_o wrote: »

I need ideas to make it stop

Murder.

Clare Bear · 19-06-2008 02:46PM

Just sit her down and say in a nice way "Look I'm sorry but I can't concentrate on my work, can you just keep your voice down a little bit please".

Of course she'll hate you forever but that's what I'd do.

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:46PM

Mossy Monk wrote: »

Murder.

lol:D

I should clarify... I need to make it stop WITHOUT going to jail as a result!

Ruu_Old · 19-06-2008 02:48PM

Pull her hair.

Phantasm · 19-06-2008 02:49PM

Laxatives.

19-06-2008 02:49PM

This post has been deleted.

Pighead · 19-06-2008 02:50PM

First of all, have a bit of respect for the girl. Sure she may talk a lot but that doesn't mean she is stupid or a lesser person than you steve_o.

Secondly, sneak up behind her, knock her out with a sellotape holder, gag her and then throw her into the Office Supplies cupboard for a couple of days.

If that doesn't work you'll probably have to look at changing jobs.

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:50PM

Phantasm wrote: »

Laxatives.

Now ye're talkin'

(Sorry boards.ie...)

mikemac · 19-06-2008 02:50PM

A horrific accident involving a kettle of boiling water, you and her in the canteen.

Who knows, maybe you tripped and someone gets scalded

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:51PM

Pighead wrote: »

First of all, have a bit of respect for the girl. Sure she may talk a lot but that doesn't mean she is stupid or a lesser person than you steve_o.

Secondly, sneak up behind her, knock her out with a sellotape holder, gag her and then throw her into the Office Supplies cupboard for a couple of days.

If that doesn't work you'll probably have to look at changing jobs.

This also might work...

Vegeta · 19-06-2008 02:51PM

Steve_o wrote: »

lol:D

I should clarify... I need to make it stop WITHOUT going to jail as a result!

A sneaky murder then

Ross_Mahon · 19-06-2008 02:53PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gk8H5V-DCqo

Is she like this?

Wazdakka · 19-06-2008 02:53PM

Steve_o wrote: »

I should clarify... I need to make it stop WITHOUT going to jail as a result!

Fill her Tea / Coffee with super glue.

Or failing that quietly and calmly beat her teeth in with a hole punch.

funk-you · 19-06-2008 02:55PM

How bout:

"Excuse me xxxxxxxx, could you be a little quieter. I find it a bit distracting while i'm working."

-Funk

armour87 · 19-06-2008 02:57PM

AIDS?

Duggy747 · 19-06-2008 02:58PM

Ask her to meet you in your office alone (Say you need to ask her a favour about "The Thompson Report" or something!)

Next thing while she's blissfully yapping away suddenly ask her "Does this smell like chloroforam to you?" and *BAM* you got her.

Now for the tricky part. Lock you office door and put clear plastic all over the place, things are going to get messy. Chop her up into neat little packages and post them to random places around the world. (I'm sure she always wanted to travel!)

The post may be tracked back to the post office you threw them into but by the time they figure that out you'll be well on your way to Mexico.

At least that way you'll shut her up.

OR

Stuff your cock in her mouth, polite people don't talk with their mouths full.

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 02:58PM

Ross_Mahon wrote: »

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gk8H5V-DCqo

Is she like this?

Cant access Youtube in work...:(

Wazdakka wrote: »

Fill her Tea / Coffee with super glue.

I like I like... quite devilish!!!

TeletextPear · 19-06-2008 02:59PM

leave a load of cake beside her desk, she wont be able to talk if shes stuffing her mouth...

ZygOte · 19-06-2008 03:02PM

wait for her to go home and then just take the phone off her desk and hide it, this may only work for a little while though........
unlesss you bribe someone in IT/Phones to make sure it stays "gone"

Shadowless · 19-06-2008 03:05PM

Send her this. Might get the message across.

Homer · 19-06-2008 03:06PM

This is the ONLY solution to your problem...

That is all...

yes I know it was posted already!

Steve_o · 19-06-2008 03:08PM

ZygOte wrote: »

wait for her to go home and then just take the phone off her desk and hide it, this may only work for a little while though........
unlesss you bribe someone in IT/Phones to make sure it stays "gone"

I could replace the phone with a different one, she can ring out still but people can't ring her back.... Its a start i guess!

RedXIV · 19-06-2008 03:10PM

cut the phone line

Stupid Girl WONT SHUT UP...

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