So you're in Woodies just as a Zombie attack begins....

mr kr0nik · 03-04-2008 03:50PM

I'd hide amongst the geraniuims and begonias. At least until the auld hay fever kicked off, then I'd be ****ed.

Dinter · 03-04-2008 04:46PM

c - 13 wrote: »

You just have to bide your time and watch their eating habits, I hear the Micheal Jackson ones have a taste for small children !

Zulu · 06-05-2008 02:17PM

Well it's taken me a while to catch up on the thread, but here's what I'd be doing.
Firstly I'd be getting hold of a hatchet. I need something to use until I've perused the isles and completed my stock-take.
Secondly those tool belts, I'd be wanting to be able to carry a good few hatchets, and hammers easily - I'm sure I'll be coming across goons who are unprepared, so I'll end up handing over at least one or two hatchets.

But it's be all hatchts, hammers, and slash hooks. And a handy axe. After that, I'm not hanging around. Hammers & hatches -> Car park -> Nearest place with guns -> Galway -> Dún Aonghasa.

Annatar · 06-05-2008 02:46PM

Im thinking ride-on lawnmowers!!!
A-Team a bunch together.... whirlying axes, blades etc. Heavy duty wire mesh around the driver.... protect against agile zombies and maybe the odd broken axe.
Hmmmmm
Power hose with a mix of gasoline and detergent - homemade napham. With garden lantern to keep it lit - pilot light.
Side arms... chain saw and shotgun. if its good enough for Ash of Evil Dead fame... its good enough for me.

Yo! she bitch! Lets Go!
Groovy!

Zulu · 06-05-2008 02:52PM

They stock shotties in Woddies now? ...that'll save me a lot of hassle.

Annatar · 06-05-2008 02:59PM

Zulu wrote: »

They stock shotties in Woddies now? ...that'll save me a lot of hassle.

Nah I just happen to carry my Baikel with me everywhere I go.... ermmm

...yeesshhhh.... I forgot.... ahhh no I spose I wouldnt have a gun.

(Nope not in Limerick. They would hardly use shotguns.....Knives for close in or Assault Rifles yes... shotguns nahhh!)

Annatar · 06-05-2008 03:04PM

speaking of which....
just imagine the poor sod of a zombie that tries to spread some Z-lovin in Limerick!!

Wouldnt get much of a hearing.

Zulu · 06-05-2008 03:07PM

Damnit, I taught I was sorted there.
You keep a shotgun handy? Don't get too ichy fingered, I'll be the one legging it to you with hatchets and hammers. I'm not after your brains, just covering fire.

Cianos · 06-05-2008 05:25PM

I would rearrange the shelves so that it creates a funnel. Using myself as the bait, the zombies will amble towards me, forced in to single file as the funnel gets tighter.

It will then be easy to pick them off one by one, using a metal dustbin lid as a shield and some pointed broom stick handles to spear the oncoming vermin. This is madness. Madness? This is zombie survival!

SimpleSam06 · 06-05-2008 06:24PM

Grab a mallet and start hobbling my fellow customers / car park refugees. Remember, you don't need to outrun the zombies, just your friends.

c - 13 wrote: »

According to the zombie survival guide IIRC a machette is the weapon of choice for a meele.

I'd disagree there, you don't need to lop off the skull entirely, just destroy the brain. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, so ideally a couple of punch knives would do the trick.

With swinging weapons you have a whole backswing to recover from, which is suicide in a zombieball. No chance of getting stuck with pointies either. From what you'd have in woodies I'd choose drillbits with chucks, also handy for mashing headshots.

I'd also wrap up in about two paint protection overalls, with as much protective gear as I could find (elbow pads, knee pads, kevlar gloves, construction helmets), slathered in WD40, making you harder to grab hold of.

elpresdentde · 06-05-2008 07:06PM

Originally Posted by boneyarsebogman View Post
I second this. The forum should be split into different sections with plans for each city/county of Ireland and then a general section on the impending Zombie Apocalypse.

you could get it put into the goverments emergencies response booklet

Annatar · 06-05-2008 07:08PM

A sleán or turf spade.... ahhh a brilliant lobo.

Annatar · 06-05-2008 07:10PM

Zulu wrote: »

Damnit, I taught I was sorted there.
You keep a shotgun handy? Don't get too ichy fingered, I'll be the one legging it to you with hatchets and hammers. I'm not after your brains, just covering fire.

Hatchets n Hammers... good ring to that!

Annatar · 06-05-2008 07:19PM

hMMMM....
I dig teh idea of a funneling system to only allow one zombie at a time.... but what if, you incorporated a heavy duty wood chipper and bait....???

Zulu · 06-05-2008 07:42PM

...or 'atchets & 'ammers as I prefer!

pirelli · 06-05-2008 07:43PM

Cianos wrote: »

I would rearrange the shelves so that it creates a funnel. Using myself as the bait, the zombies will amble towards me, forced in to single file as the funnel gets tighter.

It will then be easy to pick them off one by one, using a metal dustbin lid as a shield and some pointed broom stick handles to spear the oncoming vermin. This is madness. Madness? This is zombie survival!

Annatar wrote: »

hMMMM....
I dig teh idea of a funneling system to only allow one zombie at a time.... but what if, you incorporated a heavy duty wood chipper and bait....???

Winning combination.

Young engineers ireland award.

c - 13 · 07-05-2008 05:26AM

elpresdentde wrote: »

Originally Posted by boneyarsebogman View Post
I second this. The forum should be split into different sections with plans for each city/county of Ireland and then a general section on the impending Zombie Apocalypse.

you could get it put into the goverments emergencies response booklet

I have been drafting a letter to the Office of Emergency Planning with regards to this manner. I'm just trying to work out a way of wording it so they'll take it seriously.

SimpleSam06 wrote: »

Grab a mallet and start hobbling my fellow customers / car park refugees. Remember, you don't need to outrun the zombies, just your friends.

I'd disagree there, you don't need to lop off the skull entirely, just destroy the brain. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, so ideally a couple of punch knives would do the trick.

With swinging weapons you have a whole backswing to recover from, which is suicide in a zombieball. No chance of getting stuck with pointies either. From what you'd have in woodies I'd choose drillbits with chucks, also handy for mashing headshots.

I'd also wrap up in about two paint protection overalls, with as much protective gear as I could find (elbow pads, knee pads, kevlar gloves, construction helmets), slathered in WD40, making you harder to grab hold of.

I like your way of thinking.

Love the zombie funnel idea but I think it needs some sort of shielding at the end of it to prevent the pieces of shredded zombie from flying everywhere - what happens if a bystander behind the contraption ingests some flying zomie blood/flesh by accident ? Infection behind your lines.

Also for those of you who havent already please support the zombie survival forum (link in my sig).

SimpleSam06 · 07-05-2008 05:47AM

c - 13 wrote: »

I'm just trying to work out a way of wording it so they'll take it seriously.

A plan for the coordination of resource management on the small to mid scale in the event of sequestration of the populace or livestock by Rhabdoviridae or related illnesses, or in the case of runaway exponential viral or chemical contaminant vectors. Heh.

c - 13 · 07-05-2008 05:49AM

Oh I likes that

punchdrunk · 07-05-2008 08:49AM

why not get a few rolls of that roofing tar stuff,roll it out flat along the floor of the funnel,cover it in the most flammable liquid we can find
it'll be a ZOM-BE-Q :pac:

chopperbyrne · 07-05-2008 08:52AM

I haven't read all ten pages, but please tell me somebody said they'd do a Braindead and use a lawnmower?!!!

Cianos · 07-05-2008 10:10AM

c - 13 wrote: »

I have been drafting a letter to the Office of Emergency Planning with regards to this manner. I'm just trying to work out a way of wording it so they'll take it seriously.

I like your way of thinking.

Love the zombie funnel idea but I think it needs some sort of shielding at the end of it to prevent the pieces of shredded zombie from flying everywhere - what happens if a bystander behind the contraption ingests some flying zomie blood/flesh by accident ? Infection behind your lines.

Also for those of you who havent already please support the zombie survival forum (link in my sig).

Shield the outlet with some bin liners and an outlet funnelling system and we'll have ourselves a tidy line of...

http://img90.imageshack.us/img90/955/zombiefertiliserhj7.jpg

It could be our basis for re-buidling the world.

Dave! · 07-05-2008 10:26AM

Propane gas and a lighter = toasty zombies

07-05-2008 12:03PM

[shameless]

All of these issues and more can be discussed if the Zombie forum gets approved. See my sig for details[/shameless]

I guess it all depends on the type of Zombie we are dealing with. Are they the slow-stupid ones, the slow-smart ones, the fast ones, or the fast-ones-that-can-also-climb

Dave! · 07-05-2008 12:08PM

What about flying zombies? Or are they a different kind of species?

07-05-2008 12:15PM

DaveMcG wrote: »

What about flying zombies? Or are they a different kind of species?

I always wondered what would happen if Superman got bitten

chopperbyrne · 07-05-2008 12:20PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I always wondered what would happen if Superman got bitten

Not quite Superman, but Marvel Zombies might interest you.

Virgil° · 07-05-2008 12:26PM

DaveMcG wrote: »

What about flying zombies? Or are they a different kind of species?

How would such a zombie exist though?

Ive never much liked the idea of the fast zombies, just doesnt seem survivable.

BeerWolf · 07-05-2008 01:08PM

Nothing - just carry on knowing I'd be safe... feck all people living here in the middle of no where. :P

DanGerMus · 07-05-2008 01:55PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I always wondered what would happen if Superman got bitten

The zombies teeth would break and they would quickly get thrown into orbit, where they would be exposed to large levels of radiation while being struck by a shower of kryptonite dust that would then turn them into something that could harm superman. Then the would attack a passing space shuttle turning all its occupents into similar, but not as powerful, krypto zombies. Upon the early landing of this shuttle ground control, wondering why they had lost contact with the crew, would send a rather inept security team to investigate. Once inside the dark shuttle one would notice a dull green glow coming from behind some cargo, as he nears the glow he will realsie all to late that it is a pair of eyes belonging to what used to be Captain Syd McMurphy. This monster and the rest of the crew then attack the entire security team.

Later, Back at justice league orbital base...
The Green Lantern, monitoring some communications satelite traffic, turns to superman and says "Theres something going on in huston maybe you should check it out Superman".
Superman then Travels faster than a speeding train, much faster indeed, to huston where he sees that all the ground staff have been infected with some kind of desease that makes them act like zombies biteing everything that isn't one of them already. He is able to round up all the infected and trap them in some of the large cargo containers around the Air Base but does notice that he is feeling noticeably weaker while doing so. He Radios the JL to come and try and figure out "what is goin on here" and just as he finishes reporting in he hears some glass bottles being knocked over in a nearby research lab and goes to see what happens, He tries to use his x-ray vision but the walls seem to be lined with lead, the one thing he cant see through,
And then just as he enters the lab He recognises the Zombie that he had dispensed with months earlier now glowing green alover, thinking this is just another of the infected he reaches out to grab him and bring him to the rest. BUT no, The zombie Clamps Down on supermans forearm and sinks his jagged broken teeth deep into his flesh. Superman obviously surprised wrenches his arm away and stumbles back ,knocking over some empty barrels, he feels a wave of weakness flow through his body and his vision starts to blur, he tries with all his strength to regain his feet, he sees the SuperkryptoZombie comeing right for him, but he cant get up his arms two weak to even crawl slip from under him and he passes out... his last though is the hope that The rest of the justice league can arrive in time to save him.....

To Be Continued.....

D'uh

So you're in Woodies just as a Zombie attack begins....

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