So you're in Woodies just as a Zombie attack begins....

Virgil°

DanGerMus wrote: »

......

Good christ man!!
Quit your day job recently?:pac:

Zulu

thats great, only did the green lantern turn into superman?

DanGerMus

Lol no on evenings was bored

Zulu wrote: »

thats great, only did the green lantern turn into superman?

I can't really see how you got that but i changed some punctuation just to be sure.

Karoma

Moved

Thanks Karoma.

Thought it'd be nice to have this thread here- the inspiration for this forum.

I'll sticky this for now.

daire sweeney

getting back on post......i would run for my life, and if things take a turn for the worst.........brains!!!!!!!!!!!!

KrustytheLegend

Get a group of guys to light a fire in the paint section. Stand with your backs to it so that no-one can sneak up behind you and then chop the zombies up with petrol chain saws......... It's the only way!

Ok this thread is not really going anywhere. I'll leave it open but unsticky it.

thefinalstage

DanGerMus wrote: »

The zombies teeth would break and they would quickly get thrown into orbit, where they would be exposed to large levels of radiation while being struck by a shower of kryptonite dust that would then turn them into something that could harm superman. Then the would attack a passing space shuttle turning all its occupents into similar, but not as powerful, krypto zombies. Upon the early landing of this shuttle ground control, wondering why they had lost contact with the crew, would send a rather inept security team to investigate. Once inside the dark shuttle one would notice a dull green glow coming from behind some cargo, as he nears the glow he will realsie all to late that it is a pair of eyes belonging to what used to be Captain Syd McMurphy. This monster and the rest of the crew then attack the entire security team.

Later, Back at justice league orbital base...
The Green Lantern, monitoring some communications satelite traffic, turns to superman and says "Theres something going on in huston maybe you should check it out Superman".
Superman then Travels faster than a speeding train, much faster indeed, to huston where he sees that all the ground staff have been infected with some kind of desease that makes them act like zombies biteing everything that isn't one of them already. He is able to round up all the infected and trap them in some of the large cargo containers around the Air Base but does notice that he is feeling noticeably weaker while doing so. He Radios the JL to come and try and figure out "what is goin on here" and just as he finishes reporting in he hears some glass bottles being knocked over in a nearby research lab and goes to see what happens, He tries to use his x-ray vision but the walls seem to be lined with lead, the one thing he cant see through,
And then just as he enters the lab He recognises the Zombie that he had dispensed with months earlier now glowing green alover, thinking this is just another of the infected he reaches out to grab him and bring him to the rest. BUT no, The zombie Clamps Down on supermans forearm and sinks his jagged broken teeth deep into his flesh. Superman obviously surprised wrenches his arm away and stumbles back ,knocking over some empty barrels, he feels a wave of weakness flow through his body and his vision starts to blur, he tries with all his strength to regain his feet, he sees the SuperkryptoZombie comeing right for him, but he cant get up his arms two weak to even crawl slip from under him and he passes out... his last though is the hope that The rest of the justice league can arrive in time to save him.....

To Be Continued.....



D'uh

The zombies would burn up on re-entry. Story over.

DanGerMus

It's my story budddy and as you can see they didn't burn up so STFU.

phantom_lord

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE-uY7P3pe4

nailgun!

mackey087

i'd just turn up the boring instore music and bore those damned zombies to another death, if that didn't work then i would put a garden shed over a fork lift and hang a closed for lunch sign on the door. if the door opens it time to move house

giggsy664

I'd get a 6" brass nail, stab the trolley boy, take the trolleys and swing around with them. I'd hit every zombie there.

Access

Feck attacking them... i was in Woodies today.... just show the Zombies the prices of various items around the store and they should start screaming and run out of the store!

:D:D

SmileyPaul

Nerin wrote: »

make a perimeter around the fort with garden furniture,bbqs and lighter fluid.

I was thinking over turned lawn mowers, dhop there knees up nice and good

Valmont

TEH REAL CDP wrote: »

the unhelpful inanimate sales assistants. pick them up and use them as a striking object. you can also throw them at people.

Are you the type of customer we get that expects us to be professional plumbers/painters/electricians/contractors/gardeners/carpenters? We need a bigger sign that explains the D.I.Y. acronym. Do It Yourself, all I do is show you where it is and lift stuff to your car.

I refuse to acknowledge sprinting dead things as zombies so I'll go with the slow ones.

As a four year veteran working weekends in Woodies, I can say that some of the stores would be ideal to hold out for the zombie invasion. Most stores have a loft area accessible only by ladder and here is where you could go at the start of the outbreak. From here you can get on top of the shelves and move around getting what you need to reinforce the doors etc. One serious problem is that the newer stores have big display windows and I'm not sure if they would hold against a horde of the undead. That said, there is ample material to build a wall around this. This is a scenario I've thought about a good bit over the years. If you're in Bray woodies on Z day, you're in safe hands. I've got super plan.

neon_glows

YOU ALL SEEM TO BE GETTING HUNG UP ON BARRICADING YOURSELFS INSIDE AND FIGHTING THE ZOMBIES ETC. TBH THIS WILL LEAD TO YOU BEING SORROUNDED BY ZOMBIES AND YOU WILL EVENTUALLY GET TIRED OR RUN OUT OF AMMO AND WILL THEN HAVE NO WHERE TO RUN. YOUR BEST BET IS TO RUN LIKE HELL. DOESNT WOODIES HAVE A BACK DOOR? BRING A LIGHT WEIGHT WEAPON WITH YOU TOO. NAIL ON A STICK IS GOOD.

THEN HEAD FOR THE HILLS/MOUNTAINS....
WE SHOULD ALL REGROUP UP THERE.... BEGIN TRAINING. SET UP A BROADCAST STATION GIVING OTHER SURVIVORS INSTRUCTIONS.

WE SHOULD THEN ALL WAIT IT OUT... MAKE SURE ALL THE HOT CHICKS SURVIVE... LET ALL THE MACHO MEN DIE FIGHTING THE ZOMBIES AND THEN WHEN ALL THE ZOMBIES STARVE TO DEATH ITS THE ERA OF THE NERD.... WE REPOPULATE IRELAND USING ALL THE SAVED SEXYS

INFACT SKIP RUNNING LETS TAKE SOME OF THOSE MOTORISED LAWNMOWERS.... BRING SOME GENERATORS, PCS, LAN CABLES AND MAKE SURE THERES A DOMINOS NEAR BY THAT CAN DO DELIVERIES....

AND WHEN I SAY TRAIN I MEAN PLAY MULTI PLAYER ZOOMBIE SHOOT EM UPS....

Nerin

Can you turn off the caps lock please.

6th

neon_glows wrote: »

YOU ALL SEEM TO BE GETTING HUNG UP ON BARRICADING YOURSELFS INSIDE AND FIGHTING THE ZOMBIES ETC. TBH THIS WILL LEAD TO YOU BEING SORROUNDED BY ZOMBIES AND YOU WILL EVENTUALLY GET TIRED OR RUN OUT OF AMMO AND WILL THEN HAVE NO WHERE TO RUN. YOUR BEST BET IS TO RUN LIKE HELL. DOESNT WOODIES HAVE A BACK DOOR? BRING A LIGHT WEIGHT WEAPON WITH YOU TOO. NAIL ON A STICK IS GOOD.

Cool.

Folks, we have our decoy!

neon_glows

SORRY I NEED TO SHOUT TO BE HEARD OVER ALL THESE LAWNMOWERS, ZOMBIES, CHAINSAWS AND POWER TOOLS..... :P

An Axe, but I don't go to Woodies that often so don't know what else useful they might stock!

AskYerMa

Eh simple... a life sized poster of mary harney nakedwould scare anything in the universe away

neon_glows

taking it in the bum from gerry adams.....
ah tbh honest i dont think zombies even deserve to see that!!! poor feckers.

neon_glows

maybe we could try negoitate with there leader????

ScumLord

neon_glows wrote: »

maybe we could try negoitate with there leader????

Damned PC brigade! It's bad enough women got the vote, it's not happening for zombies too.

Nerin

ScumLord wrote: »

Damned PC brigade! It's bad enough women got the vote, it's not happening for zombies too.

ha.

ScumLord

ScumLord wrote: »

Damned PC brigade! It's bad enough women got the vote, it's not happening for zombies too.

+1

Damn Zombie rights activists.

Next we'll be working out Green issues with them!

Nerin

Deleted User wrote: »

+1

Damn Zombie rights activists.

Next we'll be working out Green issues with them!

Next we'll be letting them mod boards!

Cough. Orestes. Cough.

Nerin

Nerin wrote: »

Next we'll be letting them mod boards!

Cough. Orestes. Cough.

:D:D

neon_glows

should zombies be entitled to social welfare?