Looking for love!!!

Take a look at the following .....


I think it might sway me!! What do you think smellybiker?:D

sorry joke won't load up!! I give up :mad:

corrado wrote: »

Afternoon all
How are we all after a busy long wknd????


Come on Jen post up that funny pic what ever it is we could
do with a giggle on a tuesday ......

Is anybody feeling that burn today after spending to much time out
in the sun...

Sorry I have tried to load photo but it won't attach! Where is Red when you need him:(.

This is the best I could find:

A man walks into a bank and says he wants to borrow $200 for six months. The loan officer asks him what kind of collateral he has. The man says 'I've got a Rolls Royce -- keep it until the loan is paid off -- here are the keys.'

Six months later the man comes into the bank, pays back the $200 loan, plus $10 interest, and regains possession of the Rolls Royce.

The loan officer asks him, 'Sir, if I may ask, why would a man who drives a Rolls Royce need to borrow two hundred dollars?'

The man answers, 'I had to go to Europe for six months, and where else could I store a Rolls Royce for that long for ten dollars?'

Hope you are not too burnt every one!

Sorry to hear you had to work all weekend poor you! Hope you can get a good rest today.

Corrado and I thought you had scored and were still in bed , we were quite envious:rolleyes:

Don't worry about the walk we can catch up again. I went anyway, enjoyed the walk! I was not the only one on my own thankfully and not too many couples either.:)

Down by 2lb this week again slim trim jen will appear by christmas whoopi I can take my clothes off again then lol

Must do some work catch you later

Good morning all! Good to see you have joined us again snyper! Its a beautiful morning here today. Just a shame my eyes are glued together from a late night. Note to self must go to bed early...

Joke for the day:


Online Too Long

70 Ways To Tell You've Been Online Too Long


1. Tech Support calls "YOU" for help.

2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL".

3. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.

4. You have called out someone's screen name while making love to
your significant other.

5. You keep begging your friends to get an account so "we can hang out".

6. Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

7. You've even gotten on an airplane just to meet some folks face-to-
face.

8. You have to get a 2d phone line just so you can call Pizza Hut.

9. You go into labor and you stop to type a special e-mail to let everyone
know you're going to be away.

10. You have a vanity car tag with your screen name on it.

11. You no longer type with proper capitalization, punctuation, or
complete sentences.

12. You have met over 100 AOLers.

13. You begin to say "heh heh heh" instead of laughing.

14. When someone says "What did you say?" you reply "Scroll up!"

15. You find yourself sneaking away to the computer in the middle of the
night when your spouse is asleep.

16. You turn down the lights & close the blinds so people won't know
you're on-line again.

17. You know more about your AOL friends' daily routines than you do
your own spouses.

18. You find yourself lying to others about your time on-line & when they
complain that your phone was busy you claim it was off the hook.

19. You have an identity crisis if someone is using a screen name close to
your own.

20. You would rather tell people that your bloodshot eyes are from
partying too much than the truth (online all night).

21. You change your screen names so much that you have to look at your
own profile to see who you are.

22. Your kids are standing at your side saying, "Mommy, please come and
cook" dinner and you would rather type another "LOL".

23. You type messages to people while you are on the phone with them at
the same time.

24. You won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved.

25. Your dog leaves you.

26. You have to ask what year it is.

27. You write a letter like this.. "dear tom, hiyas! how r u doin well I gotta
go bbl!"

28. You name your pets after people you talk to.

29. You smile sideways...

30. You sign on & immediately get 10 IMs from people who have you on
their buddy list.

31. You look at an annoying person off-line & wish you had your ignore
button handy.

32. You bring a bag lunch & a cooler to the computer.

33. Your significant other kisses your neck while you're chatting & you
think "uh oh cyber sex perv".

34. You have withdrawals if you are away from the computer for more
than a few hours.

35. You use AOL lingo in everyday life (if you still have one he he he).

36. You take a speed reading course to keep up with the scrolling.

37. Your buddy list has over 100 people on it.

38. Your worse comeback to a bully is "I'll slap ya w/a rubber chicken!"

39. You wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get online
before you have your first cup of coffee.

40. You have to inject no-doze into your butt to keep it awake.

41. You have your computer set so it goes directly into AOL's welcome
screen.

42. You don't know where the time has gone.

43. You end sentences with 3 (or more) periods while writing letters by
hand.

44. You get up at 2am to go to the bathroom but turn on the computer
instead.

45. You don't even notice anymore when someone has a typo.

46. You enter a room & 23 people greet you w/((hugs)) or **kisses**.

47. You stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno and
lemme.

48. Your voicemail/answering machine message is "BRB, leave your s/n &
I will TTYL".

49. You type faster than you think.

50. You got your psychiatrist addicted to AOL too & are now undergoing
therapy in private rooms instead of at his office.

51. You want to be buried with your computer when it dies or vice versa.

52. You actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted.

53. You can actually read & follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up
your TV screen at the end of a movie.

54. People say, "If it weren't for your super reflexes in your eyes &
fingers, you would have been classified as a vegetable!"

55. You dream in "text".

56. Being called a Newbie is a "MAJOR" insult.

57. There is absolutely no interesting chat in any room & you're really
bored.

58. You don't want to leave in case you miss something.

59. You double click your TV remote.

60. You can now type over 70wpm.

61. You think about starting a 12-step recovery group for AOL junkies.

62. You are on the phone a minute & need to do something else &
say "BRB" or "BBL".

63. You check your Email and forget you have real mail aka snail mail.

64. You go into withdrawals during dinner.

65. You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to
everyone in a room.

66. You stop speaking in full sentences.

67. You have gone into an unstaffed Tech Support room & ended
up "giving" tech support to other AOLers.

68. You have to be pried from your computer by the "Jaws of Life".

69. You know what a "snert" is.

70. You set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted
to check your mail" & while there you "just wanted to see who was
online".

Hey naughty boy!!

If you are not going to wear short sleeve shirts we won't get our bikinis out lol

Sorry about length of joke, will some one please provide joke tomorrow. Hey snyper/smellybiker i do believe its your turn

Hold your horses smellybiker!!!! All is not done and dusted!! Corrado has a good bit more of wooooing to do in order to say "hooked up" lol.

So men of the world the ladies are waiting! Poor smellybiker needs a pal etc.

Hang in there!!

Joke of the day!!!

An Illinois man left the snowballed streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.

Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead.

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,

Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

Your Loving Husband.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

Hi Red,

Congratulations on the new job well done! Hmm right about holding off boards never looks good on first day lol.

Ok where is the joke then? Did you like todays one?

Yes quite right on debatable topic. You pick one for use but while we are waiting here is my rant:

Was in the supermarket yesterday and wanted to buy some serloin steak and I asked the meat chappy to cut off all the fat and slice it for me. Well he cut a section weighed it then started to cut the fat off for me and slice like I requested. He then put the previous weight price on it. I was dumbfounded! Why should I have to pay for the fat as I was on a diet and had asked him to cut it off!!!! He said it was company policy. I went off fuming. Got to the check out and girl suggested I speak to the manager when I started telling her what happened. Manager kindly reweighed my meat and gave me the money back. So folks beware when you are buying meat!!!

Ok some one else have a rant don't want to be alone.

Thanks for the joke you naughty boy!

Poor you on the job hunting! Its not men its just Ireland is running out of jobs. Tell your mate to hang in there.

Well guys I am going to love you and leave you as on a half day whooopi! Have a great weekend all. I am off to the cinema to see the Vagas film. Enjoy and catch you all monday.

PS Smellybiker if you are up for a walk this weekend just give me shout!