Looking for love!!!

Oi you two stop flirting or Red will never return!!!!

Corrado behave yourself you bold boy:)

So are we all going to the cinema then or am I on my own??

have to do some work or will get the chop. chat to you later maybe?

A joke for this morning for you all!!

After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was enough,
as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't strong enough
to nick one.

The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want
to have any more children. The doctor told him there was a procedure called
a vasectomy that would fix the problem but it was expensive. A less costly
alternative was to go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can,
then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The Scouser said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest guy in the world,
but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going
to help me.

'Trust me, it will do the job', said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the can
up to his ear and began to count: '1, 2, 3, 4, 5,' at which point he paused,
placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue counting on his
other hand.

This procedure also works in Middlesbrough, parts of Bradford and anywhere
in Wales

READ ON . . .


_____



They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to
answer in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it is embarrassing.

There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her
what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients.

I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy
handled it.

An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the
desk.

The Receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?"

"There's something wrong with my dick", he replied.

The Receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a
crowded waiting room and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.

The Receptionist replied; "Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room
full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear
or something, and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private."

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of
strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone."

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes??"

"There's something wrong with my ear", he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her
advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir??"

"I can't piss out of it," he replied.

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

corrado wrote: »

:rolleyes::rolleyes: No i wasnt.....

Hmmm I we will see!

Anyhoo how are we all this morning, i didnt get out of the scratcher untill
half 8 this morning so i had to jump into and out of the shower and get dressed running down the stairs and out the front door, so i have been chasing me tail all morning.... i hate sleeping in but at least its Friday :cool:

Horray for fridays:D! I bet Smelly was up at the crack of dawn with her cafe:). You really mustn't stay up so late Corrado is some thing keeping you up

Very good jokes Jen gave me a good giggle.

Glad you liked them had to hunt them down this morning. Its your turn next week.

Im on my way down Smelly to your cafe for the full irish breakfast im hank marvin today because i didnt get my porrdige this morning...

Hey Smelly what has happened to Red? Did he not fall for your charms:(. Looks snyper has been in contact again did you get anything apart from a groan last night

Its still sunny and warm up this end of the island how is the weather down south?? lets hope it stays for the wknd

Its sunny in waterford but we had some heavy rain during the night, grey clouds are amassing! so much for my walk to the cinema at lunch!!! You see a lady has to be prepared it could take me all weekend to find it hahhahahh

Catch you all later!