Whats the problem with tabloids you snobby cnuts??

Pighead · 30-01-2008 05:56PM

Dinter wrote: »

So do you read a broadsheet the rest of the time then like a snobby cnut?

Ooooh Dinter tries to trap Pighead in a corner with an intricant move but unfortunately Pighead fleetness of foot and speed of thought gets him off the ropes and back into Dinters face. Heres how:

PEOPLE WHO CLAIM TO HATE TABLOIDS ARE SNOBBY CNUTS.
PEOPLE WHO READ BROADHEETS AREN'T SNOBBY CNUTS.
PEOPLE CAN READ BOTH
IE PIGHEAD ISN'T A SNOBBY CNUT.

Unlucky son.

ScumLord · 30-01-2008 05:56PM

PiersMorgan wrote: »

The Irish Times uses a journaliser machine which takes one story and generates 50 articles on the same subject with the same words but in different order.

I'm convinced tabloids have a computer program that generates their stories. Insert celebrity, venue, state of undress and desired scandal.

Dragan · 30-01-2008 05:59PM

Pighead, i used to enjoy your rants but these days it feels like you are reaching just so people don't forget what an angry/funny little person you are.

Please bring back the old, proper pissed off Pighead.

Yours,

Concerned Fan.

ejmaztec · 30-01-2008 06:00PM

PiersMorgan wrote: »

The fact that Ireland has not embraced Colonial Journalism has meant it remains a backwater of intellectual vapidness.

Phwooaarrr!! Is what made England Great.

Come into the 21st Century and Embrace the Tabloid Revolution.

The Irish Times uses a journaliser machine which takes one story and generates 50 articles on the same subject with the same words but in different order.

Oh and by the way you can keep Northern Ireland we can't stand them.

Piers Morgan - Former Editor of the Mirror and Genuine Englishman

The best thing that Piers Morgan ever did was get bashed by Jeremy Clarkson on a plane. It was a great pity that Jeremy didn't toss him out of the emergency exit at 30000 feet..

LadyJ · 30-01-2008 06:01PM

ScumLord wrote: »

If your looking for hilarious headlines nothing beats the Tuam herald and other farmer rags from the wesht.

I can only imagine! The Enniscorthy paper had a great one a few years back. Front page news in that town is:

"Cemetery is full!"

tech77 · 30-01-2008 06:02PM

What's with all the Pighead haters?
I think Pighead needs to start a witheringly hilarious thread to counteract the impending Pighead backlash and deal with the threats to his putative reign as resident boards funnyman.

30-01-2008 06:02PM

Dragan wrote: »

Pighead, i used to enjoy your rants but these days it feels like you are reaching just so people don't forget what an angry/funny little person you are.

Please bring back the old, proper pissed off Pighead.

Yours,

Concerned Fan.

here here

Pighead · 30-01-2008 06:02PM

Dragan wrote: »

Pighead, i used to enjoy your rants but these days it feels like you are reaching just so people don't forget what an angry/funny little person you are.

Please bring back the old, proper pissed off Pighead.

Yours,

Concerned Fan.

Pighead has never been or will never be properly pissed off. Pighead spends his days in a general air of satisfaction and hope. You chose the wrong guy to look up to my little friend.

Yours

Pighead.

Dragan · 30-01-2008 06:05PM

Pighead wrote: »

Pighead has never been or will never be properly pissed off. Pighead spends his days in a general air of satisfaction and hope. You chose the wrong guy to look up to my little friend.

Yours

Pighead.

Now, now Pighead. You're reaching a little bit to call it looking up to. Your threads occassionally entertain me for a few minutes in work and thats about it. Sadly even that small service you offer to society seems to be slacking somewhat.

Dinter · 30-01-2008 06:07PM

PiersMorgan wrote: »

Piers Morgan - Former Editor of the Mirror and Genuine Englishman

Not much of an editor if you didn't manage to fact check the fake pictures that got you sacked.

ejmaztec · 30-01-2008 06:10PM

Tabloids are for people with very short arms and even shorter attention spans. On the other hand, you don't see many knuckle-draggers reading the broadsheets. It's a bit of a paradox really.

Pighead · 30-01-2008 06:12PM

Dragan wrote: »

Now, now Pighead. You're reaching a little bit to call it looking up to. Your threads occassionally entertain me for a few minutes in work and thats about it. Sadly even that small service you offer to society seems to be slacking somewhat.

Listen buddy, Pigheads sorry that the posteryou chose to idolise out of the thousands of posters on boards has let you down but you have to accept things move on. Back in 92 The Saw Doctors released All The Way From Tuam as their 2nd album. It was a load of old bollocks. Pighead loved their first album and was disappointed how his heroes had let him down. Did he sulk, cry, moan whinge? Nope, just sighed quietly and said" Sorry lads that was ****, you're heroes no more". End of story.

yaynay · 30-01-2008 06:18PM

kmick wrote: »

Pigheads posts are exactly the same as the tabloids.

Red head
Little content
Mostly made up
Enjoyed by Joe Duffy types

Perhaps Pighead should change his name to Pig-RedTop-Head

What the fvck is a Joe Duffy type?

People who don't have a silver spoon stuck up their ho... oh wait, I mean mouth... same thing I suppose considering most of them speak out of their hole anyway, while juggling marbles in their mouth.

eamonnm79 · 30-01-2008 06:24PM

You guys need to read, watch the documentary manufacturing consent. The shape of a paper doesnt matter if the person that owns the paper has a political agenda, and they always do. Independant media are the only ones that can be even half trusted.

Dragan · 30-01-2008 06:25PM

Pighead wrote: »

Listen buddy, Pigheads sorry that the posteryou chose to idolise out of the thousands of posters on boards has let you down but you have to accept things move on. Back in 92 The Saw Doctors released All The Way From Tuam as their 2nd album. It was a load of old bollocks. Pighead loved their first album and was disappointed how his heroes had let him down. Did he sulk, cry, moan whinge? Nope, just sighed quietly and said" Sorry lads that was ****, you're heroes no more". End of story.

See, thats more like the old Pighead. General bull**** post, ignoring points made by the poster you are interacting with and crazy metaphors.

Good boy. Keep it up and you'll get a treat, or maybe even a pat on your little piggy head.

FlutterinBantam · 30-01-2008 06:36PM

Stop rooting Pigser,no truffles in this thread for you;)

OPENROAD · 30-01-2008 07:54PM

ejmaztec wrote: »

The best thing that Piers Morgan ever did was get bashed by Jeremy Clarkson on a plane. It was a great pity that Jeremy didn't toss him out of the emergency exit at 30000 feet..

I like Piers, also responsible for the best tabloid headline ever imo.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/qwghlm/46914328/

FunkZ · 30-01-2008 07:57PM

The sports section is a disaster in them...

And The Sun has dedicated a whole section to Amy Winehouse, what the fuzz?

ScumLord · 30-01-2008 08:17PM

FunkZ wrote: »

The sports section is a disaster in them...

And The Sun has dedicated a whole section to Amy Winehouse, what the fuzz?

they like to bully those less fortunate than them selfs and highlighting her drug use diverts attention away from there own drug abuse.

Pherekydes · 30-01-2008 08:29PM

Dragan wrote: »

Your threads occassionally entertain me for a few minutes in work and thats about it.

A bit like a tabloid paper.

Terry · 30-01-2008 08:48PM

LadyJ wrote: »

They do have some hilarious headlines!

"Police forgot to check Maddie's bed"

"Katie was braindead"

That Katie one cracked me up.
I buy the sun every Saturday. Great tv guide.
Anyway, that particular Saturday, I was working in a neighbours house.
He saw the headline and said that she wouldn't be dead if she hadn't been doing drugs. What a brilliant observation from the man who got up the next morning and told me that he had done 3 or 4 bags of coke on Saturday night.

cance · 30-01-2008 09:42PM

this thread stinks of epic fail.

6th · 30-01-2008 10:45PM

eamonnm79 wrote: »

Independant media are the only ones that can be even half trusted.

HA! I just shat myself laughing at that but will I go change my jocks? Will I FCUK!

david1two3 · 30-01-2008 10:53PM

ScumLord wrote: »

If you like your soccer it's good I suppose but I don't like soccer my only sporting interest is motor sport.

I do get to browse through them regularly at friends houses during lunch and such. I read them for a laugh and mock the people who bought them. I don't think there's any cracking jornos working on tabloids, I don't read broadsheets either. I realise that may make me sound stupid and unread but so be it. Newspapers are muck.

If your looking for hilarious headlines nothing beats the Tuam herald and other farmer rags from the wesht.

The Athenry Absorber weakly is even better, its got a circulation of none as the (cr)editor cant get around to buying the next round of (dr)ink for to publish it ove a friday. The reason for its name is it absorbs everything cept ink and conksickquenkly news. I used to d liver milk in Chume dirty years ago and it was a loveless town, I think it was the milk that kept most of d livers going as it gave them a grape from d drink til sum fukker invinted wite wisky an den the lowcals had wite noise in dere eads.

Anyway its absurd absorbing news in Athenry as the headline "burning your fudge in the oven" is quite unatural unless of course its removable and is likely to cause a fence to come down as all the cows force there wicked way on pubic opinion. You know when you go into a quite field of a night with a girl or boy for a ride, get going like a Jesuit on a sabbatical and when you come to your senses you find yourselves surrounded by a herd of cattle. Thats real news.

Crazy Christ · 30-01-2008 11:23PM

Pherekydes · 30-01-2008 11:34PM

Pighead wrote: »

Pighead knows for a fact that he's cleverer than you.

...will beat your snobby arses around the pub in a table quiz.

Dead right there, bud. But you wouldn't be an "average" tabloid reader, would you?

Which means I'm still right about using it as a knuckle-scraping lowbrow flag, aren't I? And you're wrong about me fcuking up.

You are right about the table quiz, though. I was at one a while back and it was full of celebrity minutiae, pop music trifles and horse racing trivia.

Definitely not my strong suits. You and your buddies, however, being tabloid reading buffs would skate through these subjects with flying colours.

Collie D · 30-01-2008 11:37PM

Pighead wrote: »

Tell you what, you round up your speccy know it all broadsheet reading mates and Pighead will round up his tabloid reading buddies and without a shadow of a doubt Pigheads Panthers will beat your snobby arses around the pub in a table quiz.

At the risk of sounding like a fan of old Rasherbrain I would like to join your pub team, Hogskull. I think we should go for this.

Fook. I've been offline for a couple of months and since I've come back I've voted Sausageface as a funny poster and I am agreeing with him. Think I need to lie down.

Pighead · 30-01-2008 11:38PM

Slow coach wrote: »

Dead right there, bud. But you wouldn't be an "average" tabloid reader, would you?

You are right about the table quiz, though.

Definitely not my strong suits. You and your buddies, however, being reading buffs would skate through these subjects with flying colours.

Well said. Pighead appreciates your brutal honesty and apologises if he came on a tad strong earlier on. Friends again?

Pherekydes · 30-01-2008 11:43PM

Pighead wrote: »

Friends again?

As always. (In other words, no.

)

Borneo Fnctn · 31-01-2008 01:42AM

If people want to read tabloids, fair enough. I've done it myself. But "news" articles about Coronation Street storylines is taking the piss. Read what you want but don't call it news.

Whats the problem with tabloids you snobby cnuts??

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