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So my friend was in the bath...

  • 25-01-2008 05:21PM
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,866 ✭✭✭


    Masturbating like a good thing, and he shoots himself in the eye.

    On two separate occasions!

    Thoughts? Comments? Burns I can use at a later date?
    Tagged:


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,499 ✭✭✭Sabre0001


    Your "friend" eh...

    Hmm...............

    🤪



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,460 ✭✭✭Ishmael


    And you know this because............


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    "friend" *wink, wink, signal* Don't point that bloody thing at me! Filthy pair!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    Can he see any better now?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,787 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    Mirror wrote: »
    Masturbating like a good thing, and he shoots himself in the eye.

    On two separate occasions!

    Thoughts? Comments? Burns I can use at a later date?
    Well he must have been told he'd go blind at himself all the time. Next time maybe he'll listen to his mother.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 28,128 ✭✭✭✭Mossy Monk


    Mirror wrote: »
    Masturbating like a good thing, and he shoots himself in the eye.

    On two separate occasions!

    Thoughts? Comments? Burns I can use at a later date?
    You shouldn't be watching your friend masturbate in the bath.

    Pervert.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,400 ✭✭✭Maximilian


    I wonder how many **** threads that is now? Is there a statistics thingy for Boards?

    How about a dedicated **** & **** forum?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,159 ✭✭✭✭Xavi6


    Ah good ol mushroom island.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,866 ✭✭✭Adam


    Maximilian wrote: »
    I wonder how many **** threads that is now? Is there a statistics thingy for Boards?

    How about a dedicated **** & **** forum?
    Great idea! :D

    Honestly, when I was told the story, I couldn't understand why anyone would let that out. I'd keep such events fairly close to my chest! Unfortunately he missed his chest I guess.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,194 ✭✭✭KamiKazi


    So masturbation does make you blind!


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  • Posts: 2,862 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    there are no words!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    Maybe he liked it the first time and...........


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,024 ✭✭✭Lockstep


    KamiKazi wrote: »
    So masturbation does make you blind!

    Of course.

    I used to be a danger in the science lab. Prime examples include me getting calcium up my nose and spilling hydrochloric acid on my friends workbook.
    Anyways.

    Once I was putting down a beaker of copper sulphate but let it down to suddenly so a jet shot up and hit me in the eye.
    I got an eyepatch for a week and had a grand old time telling people that I had hit myself in the eye ****.

    eeeh good times.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 505 ✭✭✭briantwin


    Ahahahaha..... Lesson learned...you'd think! He managed to have a bukaki solo session not once but twice!!?? Did he tell you this story with a "suggestive" tone in his voice. Maybe he wanted to try round three in multiplayer???


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,983 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    Well, don't let any of his female relatives use the bath after him.;)

    They will be entering multiple toe territory if they do...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,296 ✭✭✭RandolphEsq


    Pink eye


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 412 ✭✭MCMLXXXIII


    ...maybe he normally doesn't shoot it that far?

    All I know is that it stings like woah...

    It would make for a good "cock block" though. If he's talking to a girl he fancies you can tell her that he shoots himself in the eye on multiple ocations, smile, then go order yourself another beer and watch him squirm. Don't expect nothing back though :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,159 ✭✭✭✭Xavi6


    MCMLXXXIII wrote: »
    ...maybe he normally doesn't shoot it that far?

    All I know is that it stings like woah...

    It would make for a good "cock block" though. If he's talking to a girl he fancies you can tell her that he shoots himself in the eye on multiple ocations, smile, then go order yourself another beer and watch him squirm. Don't expect nothing back though :rolleyes:

    Except maybe a shot in the eye from across the dancefloor.....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,321 ✭✭✭prendy


    another classic thread!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,866 ✭✭✭Adam


    It just baffles me! I mean once, fine, it was an accident... but twice?! It raises eyebrows! ;)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,983 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    Make him wear sunglasses and a balaclava next time he is going for a bath. Problem solved.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,866 ✭✭✭Adam


    Make him wear sunglasses and a balaclava next time he is going for a bath. Problem solved.
    Well I was thinking it would warrant a quirky birthday present on that level! :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,509 ✭✭✭✭randylonghorn


    Maximilian wrote: »
    How about a dedicated **** & **** forum?
    Boards and **** ... two of my favourite hobbies combined ... yeah! \o/

    Seriously, though, I think it could get out of hand quite quickly ...
    Mirror wrote: »
    I'd keep such events fairly close to my chest!
    Ah, but you obviously don't have the same range or velocity ... no wonder you wouldn't feel the need to boast!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,159 ✭✭✭✭Xavi6


    Boards and **** ... two of my favourite hobbies combined ... yeah! \o/

    Seriously, though, I think it could get out of hand quite quickly ...

    Yeah if the admins apporved it it'd be the kind of forum that could blow up in their face


  • Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 15,001 ✭✭✭✭Pepe LeFrits


    there are no words!
    Except "arousal".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,815 ✭✭✭✭Dord


    Mirror wrote: »
    Well I was thinking it would warrant a quirky birthday present on that level! :D

    How about this for his next birthday?

    http://www.alligata.co.uk/media/gbu0/prodsm/safety-goggles.jpg

    :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,931 ✭✭✭togster


    to remove cum from eye the best thing is to wash it out with urine i find anyway.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,740 ✭✭✭Naos


    "Zee goggles, they do nothing!"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,564 ✭✭✭Naikon


    Why was he **** in the bath:confused:


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,650 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    Now he knows how my last score felt.


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