shocking work poo etiquette

AlmightyCushion · 02-07-2007 11:23AM

Plug wrote:

Personally I'd use my jocks and go camando if theres no paper, I wouldn't go the direction were you smear beer sh!t on the seat, I wouldn't recommend it anyway.

But you would take a dump out of a window.

Plug · 02-07-2007 11:24AM

Well........
yessems:(

Duggy747 · 02-07-2007 12:06PM

Eurgh, I remember I was in a nite-club up in Sligo one night and the mess I saw.......no man should endure. Anywho, I went into the toilets and talked to the foreign guy who gives you wollipops and lynx at the sink when next thing started cursing, grabbed a mop and told me to look after his stuff (I used to work with him before so he must've trusted me!). He came back with a disgruntled face saying: "Ah am not touching that thoilet!!"

I laugh and then go to the urinal for some drunken release when next thing this mega fúckton smell overwhelmed me. I turn around and see a bouncer laughing while closing a cubicle door with his foot. I ask him what's so funny, he goes: "You gotta see this!" and proceeds to kick open the door. I was greeted by a cloud of poo smell that hit me like a cavity block in the nose. I quickly gathered myself together and looked inside to which I saw:

The toilet was covered and smeared in poo.
The wall was covered in poo (with a nice brown hand-print for good measure)
A pair of boxers covered in a mountain of melted poo.
Poo splash-back ALL over the floor!

Litteraly, there must've have been 10 days-worth of shìt inside that cubicle!! What the hell happened in there I'll never, or EVER want to know! The image of the cubicle stuck with me all night in the club resulting in me walking around with a disgruntled look. Felt sorry for the poor bastard I knew in the toilets who had to clean that gloop up.

Hankyspanky123 · 02-07-2007 12:12PM

Ahhhhh i just after slipping home from work for 10 mins to have a lovely quiet civilized pooh in my own private toilet, no mess, no skidds, just me and the indo. Lovely.

There is no satisfaction in public Poohing

AlmightyCushion · 02-07-2007 12:12PM

Duggy747 wrote:

Eurgh, I remember I was in a nite-club up in Sligo one night and the mess I saw.......no man should endure. Anywho, I went into the toilets and talked to the foreign guy who gives you wollipops and lynx at the sink when next thing started cursing, grabbed a mop and told me to look after his stuff (I used to work with him before so he must've trusted me!). He came back with a disgruntled face saying: "Ah am not touching that thoilet!!"

I laugh and then go to the urinal for some drunken release when next thing this mega fúckton smell overwhelmed me. I turn around and see a bouncer laughing while closing a cubicle door with his foot. I ask him what's so funny, he goes: "You gotta see this!" and proceeds to kick open the door. I was greeted by a cloud of poo smell that hit me like a cavity block in the nose. I quickly gathered myself together and looked inside to which I saw:

The toilet was covered and smeared in poo.
The wall was covered in poo (with a nice brown hand-print for good measure)
A pair of boxers covered in a mountain of melted poo.
Poo splash-back ALL over the floor!

Litteraly, there must've have been 10 days-worth of shìt inside that cubicle!! What the hell happened in there I'll never, or EVER want to know! The image of the cubicle stuck with me all night in the club resulting in me walking around with a disgruntled look. Felt sorry for the poor bastard I knew in the toilets who had to clean that gloop up.

Ha ha ha I remember you telling me about that alright. All the puns that came out of it. "Oh Duggy that was so funny I nearly sh!rt myself" and many more that I was too drunk to remember. If I was you though I would have nicked all his lollipops. Drunk girls will do anything for a lollipop and I mean anything.

Duggy747 · 02-07-2007 12:19PM

AlmightyCushion wrote:

If I was you though I would have nicked all his lollipops. Drunk girls will do anything for a lollipop and I mean anything.

Of course I took a small amount, I had to be paid somehow!

Me: "Hey Baby!"
Girl: "I have a cúnt!"
Me: "Don't we all? Would you like a wollipop?"
Girl: "Oooooh, what flavour?"
Me: "Well, there's strawberry flavoured and then there's cock flavoured!"

That'll work yet. Usually that scenario goes like this:

Me: "Hey Baby!"
*SLAP!*
Girl: "Perv!!!!"

AlmightyCushion · 02-07-2007 12:26PM

Duggy747 wrote:

That'll work yet. Usually that scenario goes like this:

Me: "Hey Baby!"
*SLAP!*
Girl: "Perv!!!!"

She's just playing hard to get.

Plug · 02-07-2007 12:46PM

I saw similer in Kilkenny, just imagine if you were in bits and fell on top of it:eek:
*camera phone moment*

Archeron · 02-07-2007 12:47PM

I once went into the gents toilet in a pub in Kilkenny to find a lovely lady (presumably an acrobat of some sort) having a dump into the sink in the mens tiolet. She reckoned that she was perfectly entitled to do that, a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do, and the queue for the wimmins was too long. She vocally exclaimed that "if you dont like it, then stop bleedin looking"

Charming and classy, that girl had it all.

Plug · 02-07-2007 12:49PM

Plug wrote:

I saw similer in Kilkenny, just imagine if you were in bits and fell on top of it
*camera phone moment*

Archeron wrote:

I once went into the gents toilet in a pub in Kilkenny to find a lovely lady (presumably an acrobat of some sort) having a dump into the sink in the mens tiolet. She reckoned that she was perfectly entitled to do that, a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do, and the queue for the wimmins was too long. She vocally exclaimed that "if you dont like it, then stop bleedin looking"

Charming and classy, that girl had it all.

Thats KK for ya:rolleyes:

*edit* This is actually quite good talking about ****ty toilets:)

Reku · 02-07-2007 01:17PM

jester77 wrote:

Ah, the "unflushable"

Ah those are easy to deal with, just bring an icecube, afterall it worked for the Titanic!:D

AlmightyCushion · 02-07-2007 01:49PM

farohar wrote:

Ah those are easy to deal with, just bring an icecube, afterall it worked for the Titanic!:D

:D I'll ave to remember that one.

shocking work poo etiquette

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