Everyday Things You Have Never Done Anyday.

Steve_o · 18-06-2007 04:04PM

Archeron wrote:

I have never had a beautiful lady take a dump on my chest. Hate to admit it, but there you go!

Really??? Get with the times man, all the cool kids are doin it!!!:D

On topic...I've been driving for 2 years and i can't change a puncture!

FunkZ · 18-06-2007 04:06PM

Peter Collins wrote:

I have never

a) given myself a nickname
b) referred to myself in the third person by the nickname I made up
c) thought I was a gas character for doing so

A: You're just not cool enough man.
B: Neither have I and I think it's rather sad man. But...
C: Arron cracks himself up all the time 85% of the time!

I've never ever been to a concert, or the cinema on my own?

Tar.Aldarion · 18-06-2007 04:08PM

Can' sew, never lit a cigarette, haven't brushed my teeth, showered, been in the sun or brushed my hair.

Duggy747 · 18-06-2007 04:08PM

Can't skin a joint despite being surrounded by it for 8 years

Though it gets me out of situations where people ask me (I'm ScabMaster 2000 Series) I'm just so bloody lazy. As for having a steamer squeezed out on my chest I'll hold my hand up in shame and say no, I haven't tried it yet.

MikeHoncho · 18-06-2007 04:13PM

Duggy747 wrote:

Can't skin a joint despite being surrounded by it for 8 years Though it gets me out of situations where people ask me (I'm ScabMaster 2000 Series) I'm just so bloody lazy.

I will join you that one Duggy. I actually made a conscious decision not to learn as I have an addictive personality and would probably have completly messed my life up. I also never learned how to self inject, chop a line, make crack etc.

Don1 · 18-06-2007 04:15PM

Can't cook. Tried it a few years back and got on okay, but I just don't bother.

5starpool · 18-06-2007 04:19PM

To use a real life* example where an everyday skill that I don't have stymied me in some way, if I was at one side of an unwadeable river with no bridge or boat or any other way of crossing without swimming, and there was a gorgeous woman on the other side offering herself to me on the other side of the river, if only I would come across to her, then I would sadly not be able to get there as I swim like a stone.

*may never have happened

Slow Motion · 18-06-2007 04:20PM

Never done a full days work, I've tried many times but the interweb keeps drawing me back, it's just so bloody sticky

Peter Collins · 18-06-2007 04:26PM

Pighead wrote:

Collins, Pighead is sure you're a lovely fella but its plainly obvious that you are not suited to the daily rigours of writing on a message board.

Out of your 250 pots, 249 of them have been negative moaning whingeing nonsense.( The exception being that post you made in Antiques a while back, brilliantly crafted post if you don't mind me saying).

Perhaps its time to hang up the typewriter and sort out the issues in your life that make you so miserable.

By the way, question for the mods. Pighead realises that calling a auser a cnut on a thread is a bannable offence, but I'm wondering is it ok to use that term via PM without fear of sanction?

Pighead has strayed off-topic

electric69 · 18-06-2007 04:28PM

Blitzkrieger wrote:

There's lots of people like that out there......

They are called "females"

John Mason · 18-06-2007 04:28PM

i cant roll a joint with the use of a little machine (hangs head in shame)

electric69 · 18-06-2007 04:31PM

Peter Collins wrote:

Pighead has strayed off-topic

Off with his head i say!

kevmy · 18-06-2007 04:32PM

Pighead wrote:

Collins, Pighead is sure you're a lovely fella but its plainly obvious that you are not suited to the daily rigours of writing on a message board.

Out of your 250 pots, 249 of them have been negative moaning whingeing nonsense.( The exception being that post you made in Antiques a while back, brilliantly crafted post if you don't mind me saying).

Perhaps its time to hang up the typewriter and sort out the issues in your life that make you so miserable.

By the way, question for the mods. Pighead realises that calling a auser a cnut on a thread is a bannable offence, but I'm wondering is it ok to use that term via PM without fear of sanction?

Ah now Pighead take it easy, we all know Peter Collins is too busy presenting Moto GP and the like on the television to ever learn how to write eloquently.

monkeyfudge · 18-06-2007 04:45PM

I don't know how to tie my shoelaces...

I used to have that episode of King Rolo that shows you how to do it... but someone taped over it.

Miguel_Sanchez · 18-06-2007 04:47PM

I don't know what a tracker mortgage is.

monkeyfudge · 18-06-2007 04:52PM

Jeff_Lebowski wrote:

I don't know what a tracker mortgage is.

I think it's a really expensive Tracker Bar that you have to take out a massive loan in order to afford.

imeatingchips · 18-06-2007 04:59PM

Peter Collins wrote:

Pighead has strayed off-topic

the pigs ramblings are both infinitely wise and hilariously funny. your ramblings, on the other hand, are cack.

zuutroy · 18-06-2007 05:04PM

imeatingchips wrote:

the pigs ramblings are both infinitely wise and hilariously funny.

You must be easily amused.

Homer · 18-06-2007 05:08PM

I've never looked at another mans wife

Peter Collins · 18-06-2007 05:10PM

imeatingchips wrote:

the pigs ramblings are both infinitely wise and hilariously funny. your ramblings, on the other hand, are cack.

He's a legend of the board alright

imeatingchips · 18-06-2007 05:25PM

zuutroy wrote:

You must be easily amused.

Unfortunately, only a select few (but especially the pig) can induce my laughter

and none of this lol business while staring solemnly at the screen mind you, an actual laugh.

HOOOOOLD on a second, I just saw your sig ... you like snooker and baseball and you say I'M easily amused