What's the REAL story with stag nights?

GAA widow · 17-10-2006 04:41PM #1

saw thread on stag night ideas there and it got me thinking... we often hear "what happens on the stag stays on the stag, nudge nudge, wink wink" etc.
So lads, once and for all, what's the actual story about stag nights?

Giblet · 17-10-2006 04:44PM

Lots of gay sex, he may never have a chance again!

dr.bollocko · 17-10-2006 04:44PM

Its all one big con, so that the guy can arrange a labotomy, so that he can actually put up with being married for any significant amount of time before figuring out what an idiot he was. Thats why the groom always looks so much wose for wear than anyone else the morning after. The bit of his brain that cares about him ruining his life has been drunk clear out his ear, and now he is free to listen and be moaned at for the rest of his life.

TheBlock · 17-10-2006 04:45PM

Someones fella is going on a stag and there a little nervous....:D

Ruu_Old · 17-10-2006 04:45PM

All a cover, us lads go out for tea and scones, a jolly good time.

dr.bollocko · 17-10-2006 04:46PM

Ha! Like u were gonna find out what REALLY happens that easily.
We didnt get this far as a gender by giving away our secrets to other genders.
Why do ye think ye cant open jam jars?

godtabh · 17-10-2006 04:50PM

dr.bollocko wrote:

We didnt get this far as a gender by giving away our secrets to other genders.

What other genders? I can only think of one!

dr.bollocko wrote:

Its all one big con, so that the guy can arrange a labotomy, so that he can actually put up with being married for any significant amount of time before figuring out what an idiot he was. Thats why the groom always looks so much wose for wear than anyone else the morning after. The bit of his brain that cares about him ruining his life has been drunk clear out his ear, and now he is free to listen and be moaned at for the rest of his life.

Women arent that bad are they?

Going to a stage my self in a while. Cant wait

TheBlock · 17-10-2006 04:55PM

To a stage or Through a stage???

Of course women are that bad that's why "What happens on Stag stays on Stag nudge nudge wink wink":D

skywalker · 17-10-2006 05:04PM

Ruu wrote:

All a cover, us lads go out for tea and scones, a jolly good time.

Come now Ruu, tell the whole truth. We play boggle aswell!

crosstownk · 17-10-2006 05:12PM

I wish I could tell you, but as we all have so much to drink on a stag's we can't even remember ourselves.

All those weekends away and no memories.........................

stovelid · 17-10-2006 05:17PM

Its not really a proper stag unless he tries to shag a stripper is it?

The Sweeper · 17-10-2006 05:31PM

The real story is that if your bloke's a total arsehole he'll use it as an excuse to have sex with someone else.

And if your bloke's a total arsehole, why are you marrying him?

The_Minister · 17-10-2006 05:31PM

stovelid wrote:

Its not really a proper stag unless he tries to shag a stripper is it?

I think you'll find thats kill a stripper.
Its OK though because they're already dead inside.

oulu · 17-10-2006 05:35PM

We talk about how lucky we are to have such great girls who let us away for a weekend to do some male bonding, tell the guy who's lucky time has come to get married to ring her at least 10 times over the weekend telling her he wishs she where here. what did you expect went on.

stovelid · 17-10-2006 05:38PM

no, no, mate; I actually meant shag a stripper. Sorry for the confusion.

The_Minister wrote:

I think you'll find thats kill a stripper.

17-10-2006 06:21PM

A wake for giving up the single life?

Pighead · 17-10-2006 06:30PM

The real story is that if your girl's a total arsehole she'll use it as an excuse to have sex with someone else.

And if your girl's a total arsehole, why are you marrying her?

seamus · 17-10-2006 06:36PM

MinesBIGSLUT wrote:

The real story is that if your bloke's a total arsehole he'll use it as an excuse to have sex with someone else.

And if your bloke's a total arsehole, why are you marrying him?

Ha, once again MAJD has said what I wanted to say, but in 10% of the words.

Anyone who claims that "Every man has a last shag on their stag" is one of the above mentioned total arseholes.

faceman · 17-10-2006 09:05PM

I've never been on a stage where the bloke gettin married didnt get his rock n roll.... mwahahahaha!

in reality tho, the stag NEVER scores on his stag. Such a shame!

\m/_(>_<)_\m/ · 18-10-2006 07:53AM

GAA widow wrote:

saw thread on stag night ideas there and it got me thinking... we often hear "what happens on the stag stays on the stag, nudge nudge, wink wink" etc.
So lads, once and for all, what's the actual story about stag nights?

same thing that happens ate a hen, lots of lesbian action....for each man.

bluto63 · 18-10-2006 11:17AM

skywalker wrote:

Come now Ruu, tell the whole truth. We play boggle aswell!

That's only on those wild nights though!

ferdi · 18-10-2006 11:23AM

instead of going on a stag i think the groom should spend 24hours alone with the mother-in-law to be. if he still wants to marry the girl after seeing what she will become, then ye know its for real.

Big Nelly · 18-10-2006 11:27AM

All the stags I go on its the same rule "what happens on tour stays on tour"

Best place for a stag is Edinburugh for a weekend, there is soo many hen parties there, and believe me it was the hen parties girl we all where with so you cant just blame stags. Did cause alot of confusion morning we where supposed to get plane home when we more or less where just ringin people and tell them to meet at airport because nobody was in the correct hotel:D

dr.bollocko · 18-10-2006 11:29AM

Yeah in fairness, the hen night is a lot seedier, tackier and nastier than any cruel tricks men can come up with. Frigging L plates, glittery cheap things from pound shops, dirty drunken scary women. Eww.

brown*eyed*girl · 18-10-2006 11:41AM

dr.bollocko wrote:

Yeah in fairness, the hen night is a lot seedier, tackier and nastier than any cruel tricks men can come up with. Frigging L plates, glittery cheap things from pound shops, dirty drunken scary women. Eww.

LOL have to agree, was in a pub recently & the most timid, shy barman was harassed by a "gaggle of hens" screeching obsene things at him & grabbing his ars*. I really did want the ground to open up for him. He was mortified

.

One memory that sticks in my mind of a stag night was when I was only 18 & we were in a club & the groom to be was tied to a pole in the middle of the dance floor, naked with silly string sprayed all over him. Myself & my mates were shocked as we had only recenlty started going out! but we still got a good look

Often wonder did he get home ok..

dr.bollocko · 18-10-2006 11:48AM

Of course he got home ok!
"NO MAN LEFT BEHIND!!!"

Big Nelly · 18-10-2006 11:54AM

dr.bollocko wrote:

Of course he got home ok!
"NO MAN LEFT BEHIND!!!"

Well said!!!!!

Women are a different story, there friend could be dead in the cornor and she would walk out without a care in the world and off home!!!

Donegal Lass · 18-10-2006 12:10PM

thats because the groom-to-be on a stag do got to her first!!

Big Nelly · 18-10-2006 12:30PM

Donegal Lass wrote:

thats because the groom-to-be on a stag do got to her first!!

What the hell you talking about?

\m/_(>_<)_\m/ · 18-10-2006 01:19PM

dr.bollocko wrote:

Of course he got home ok!
"NO MAN LEFT BEHIND!!!"

wasn't that said about Ernest Shackleton or was it Tom Crean.

Sleepy · 18-10-2006 02:19PM

From the vantage point of working as a night porter, the brides-to-be seemed to be more likely to bring someone back to the hotel room with her than her male counterpart on a roughly 7:5 ratio.

Most stag dos that I've been on have been tame enough affairs which just consisted of getting rat arsed with the boys, singing badly and lots of cheap jokes at the stag's expense.

What's the REAL story with stag nights?

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