Confessions of a [insert job title]

LAAngel · 07-07-2006 03:49PM

Aye well I love Starbars. I'm from the North does that explain it haha.
Another thing I like about working in Nightclubs is finding money, everyone seems to drop money, haha. Found 20 euro the other night haha.:D

FlutterinBantam · 07-07-2006 03:53PM

L31mr0d wrote:

I've never done an honest day of work in any crappy part time job i've had. I've always stolen something, not worked hard enough or called in sick. I just can't, I feel if I take it seriously I might think i'm good at it and stay there. Although i've never been fired or caught as I can blagg like the rest of them.

The worst thing i've ever done (and i still kinda regret it) was to get some guy I worked with fired. It was his first week and I decided to play some pranks on him (cup of water perched on the top of a door, cutting the bottoms of bags he had to take out to the bins...etc) at the end of the day he reported me to the manager, when I denied it and the manager (who was endeared to me) sided with me, the lad lost the plot and started shouting profanities at the manager. Fired on the spot.

ROFL....heh heh... Youse public servants are rare ones.... I always thought yez were straight laced

Collie D · 07-07-2006 04:04PM

Got in a row with a customer once when working McD's years ago. Had been away for weekend and got straight off train and into work, not the happiest of bunnies. Some drunken tool came in from Croke Park and started abusing the black security guard, I tried to step in to seperate them and your man threw a punch. Thought to myself, right I'm not having that so hit him back and he flew back and cracked his head on floor. Thought I had killed him when he didn't move for a few seconds. Garda statement filled out, camera evidence taken, completely exonerated, even got praise from the boss ;o)

ThrownAway · 07-07-2006 04:42PM

L31mr0d wrote:

The worst thing i've ever done (and i still kinda regret it) was to get some guy I worked with fired. It was his first week and I decided to play some pranks on him (cup of water perched on the top of a door, cutting the bottoms of bags he had to take out to the bins...etc) at the end of the day he reported me to the manager, when I denied it and the manager (who was endeared to me) sided with me, the lad lost the plot and started shouting profanities at the manager. Fired on the spot.

That is so mean. The poor guy.

soma · 07-07-2006 04:48PM

One summer (while a student @Uni) I was working in a Dublin Hotel (Worldwide Chain) and would pretty much be the only barman on duty.

I could_not_stand management, they were so-so to me but treated everyone else horribly. Anyways I quickly realised that they had a non existent stock control system, never had any idea of inventory etc.

So what I decided to do was to become the most generous barman in the world(tm). If you ordered a measure of spirits from me, you got the option of a free upgrade to a double or triple, rarely charged for mixers, plenty of pints
were re-filled free of charge..

They were always tourists so the hotel never knew about it, big-mouthed locals would have probably have told their mates etc and gotten me shopped in no time.

jrey1981 · 07-07-2006 04:57PM

Arranged a meeting with several guys from a company in London who I had in mind as potential suppliers.

The meeting was at San Lorenzo, the overrated and overpriced restaurant in Kensington.

All through the meeting one guy keeps going to the toilet and his nose seems to be irritating him.

They made a point of making sure I saw their car when I left - a Ferrari.

Spoke to someone else in the same business who also met them not long afterwards. He had walked in on the guy doing coke in the toilets, and had found out from a colleague that they hired the Ferrari for every meeting they arranged, just to impress whoever they were meeting.

DamienH · 07-07-2006 05:00PM

soma wrote:

One summer (while a student @Uni) I was working in a Dublin Hotel (Worldwide Chain) and would pretty much be the only barman on duty.

I could_not_stand management, they were so-so to me but treated everyone else horribly. Anyways I quickly realised that they had a non existent stock control system, never had any idea of inventory etc.

So what I decided to do was to become the most generous barman in the world(tm). If you ordered a measure of spirits from me, you got the option of a free upgrade to a double or triple, rarely charged for mixers, plenty of pints
were re-filled free of charge..

They were always tourists so the hotel never knew about it, big-mouthed locals would have probably have told their mates etc and gotten me shopped in no time.

that's fair enough tbh, I do the stock in the bar I work in

Winters · 07-07-2006 05:07PM

Confessions of a Bum.

Walked home from town as I wasnt going to spend 25 euro on a taxi. Took me three hours. Got home at 6:30 and slept till about 2.

Got up, read some emails and chatted a bit then had breakfast about an hour ago. Been talking to mates since.

Awesome execpt for the whle lack of money.

Day-wanna-wonga · 07-07-2006 05:35PM

Rhyme wrote:

So regail us with your tales of five finger discounts and 'deposits' in changing rooms then.

I don't have any.....so I don't try to pretend something crap qualifies as such.

Rhyme · 07-07-2006 05:39PM

Day-wanna-wonga wrote:

I don't have any.....so I don't try to pretend something crap qualifies as such.

;_;

Boooooring...

you still have time to make your presence worthwhile, quick... break something.

projectmayhem · 07-07-2006 05:48PM

not so much a confession, but a funny tale anyway

i worked in xtra-vision last year for about 8 months, and in that time "million dollar baby" was a big release. well, one guy got million dollar baby. now, XV customers will know there's a drop-box outside the store so you don't have to come in to return dvd's... well, some poor guy dropped his DVD in there.

when we book the dvd's in, we open the case to make sure the DVD is there, and not in rag order (naturally). well, imagine my shock having to show my workmates that million dollar baby had not been returned, but instead, "anal princess" was inside

next day rolls by and i'm working with the manager, so i show him and another full-timer. their reaction? stick it on the dvd player! had to be turned off ASAP, as naturally, it wasn't "family fun"... then the fight over who'd take it home first happened.

that's not where it ends though. about 2 weeks later the DVD was there, and one of the other part-timers was there with me, and we were fairly bored, so she decided to ring up the customer, and the guys mom answered, and the full story was given. €20 was owed with the DVD. next day in the drop box was a clear DVD case with €20 and the membership card... which was never used again

Adam · 07-07-2006 05:53PM

projectmayhem wrote:

next day in the drop box was a clear DVD case with €20 and the membership card... which was never used again

Fukin priceless!!

Giblet · 07-07-2006 05:58PM

Day-wanna-wonga wrote:

I don't have any.....so I don't try to pretend something crap qualifies as such.

Don't post in the thread again.

Adam · 07-07-2006 06:01PM

Worked in the hot food counter of a SuperValu for a couple of months, I must have eaten hundreds of euro's worth of food on the sly in that place!!

Cake Fiend · 07-07-2006 06:23PM

Winters wrote:

Walked home from town as I wasnt going to spend 25 euro on a taxi. Took me three hours.

I did that once, when I was a poor student bum and lived approx 12 miles from the city centre. Not a bother when you've a skinful though.

Nightwish · 07-07-2006 07:54PM

I once used a customers printer they had purchased as a sort of football, and kicked it around the place before giving it to her because she had been really rude and aggressive to me. I also had a tv and microwave thrown at me by some lovely people and some upstanding members of the travelling community threw a playstation at me. I have been verbally abused and threatened by customers.

biko · 07-07-2006 08:01PM

While working in a hospital we made trowing stars out of scalpel blades. Those yokes will stick in a concrete wall! Or bounce off so you had to have a safe distance...

Do not try this at home kids

Nightwish · 07-07-2006 08:03PM

^^^we do that too, except with pens, its a lot safer

tuxy · 07-07-2006 08:28PM

op did you get the idea from this http://www.deepveininsomnia.com/SBcopsc1.php?
good read

Iago · 07-07-2006 08:30PM

working for a door to door sales company and a couple of nights I had to call back into the office to explain that I wouldn't be back that night as I was "stranded" due to traffic congestion/public service disruption etc..The 6 months I spent working there where an education in so many ways!!

Then when I worked as a plasterer we went into one of these old georgian houses on Harcourt Road to replaster all the ceilings, had to be really careful because there were chandeliers in every room. Boss told us to use 1/4 of the amount of bonding compound we should have been using, with the result that the following week a call came in from the home owner. The plaster had come loose from the ceilings in the house and smashed all the chandeliers in most of the rooms!!

pred racer · 07-07-2006 08:33PM

My mate and I spent 3 weeks laying floors at a nurses training college;)
job should have taken about a week and a half, but we came across a good few 'problems' that entailed us staying on:D lets just say that they didnt see the need to change their showering habits just cause there was 2 blokes in the place! and didnt see why we shouldnt be the entertainment for the 3 weeks..:D

had to leave after 3 weeks though the two of us were nearly dead.

But it wasnt all good...... my mate got a dose of the clap!

07-07-2006 08:39PM

Robbo wrote:

Similar but inferior to the mighty Star Bar.

Currently working in property management in a student village and I can't get over some of the stuff left behind. We found loads of bongo (although all the DVDs were just empty cases), at least 12 crutches, loads of hair straighteners and one girl who must have left one of every pair of her shoe behind (unless she lost a leg during the year).

Cuirt,Gort or Corrib?

Agamemnon · 07-07-2006 10:12PM

I had a summer job in a factory once and me and another student part-timer had to paint the floor of the factory while it closed for 2 weeks holidays. I don't know what was in that paint but we didn't dilute it enough and it made us high as kites. We would paint for a bit, then burst out laughing for no reason. It made us so giddy we forgot all about work and had trolley races and climbed all over the machinery. Several times I was literally rolling on the floor laughing, usually on a part I'd just painted. A job that should have taken a few days still wasn't done by the end of the 2 weeks and they got someone else to finish it. I had a "hangover" for a week after it.

Used to work in supermarket and it really annoyed me when customers left goods in front of me on the counter then went off shopping again, too lazy to use a basket or trolley. They always barged up to the head of the queue after this as well. I got my sweet revenge by damaging the goods and putting them into a bag before they got back: I smashed eggs, scratched cds, tore newspapers, shook up bottles of fizzy drinks, spat into salad, sneezed into coleslaw and wiped meat on the floor. Oddly enough, nothing was ever returned. Happy days.

Gone West · 07-07-2006 10:24PM

... I had to sign multiple NDAs
and as such cant say anything.

Odysseus · 07-07-2006 11:24PM

Work as a therapist now in the Addiction Services, about ten years ago when I was just training, I was talking to a client in the kicthen of the centre I work. He had an abcess on his arm which was only starting, told me he burned himself. Before he knew I had opened the first aid kit and sprayed it with a burn spray, you would want to have seen that cnut jump!

Dooom · 07-07-2006 11:37PM

I robbed an MP3 (worth bout €400) player from an electronics shop I worked in before.
Wrong yes, but they were such prìcks. Making me go on my own to bring a fuppin' 40" TV to a customer.
That and seeing a price list: they bought these tiny handheld radios in at something like €2 each, and then they marked them up to €14! FFS like. I know that's Ireland, but seeing it made me want to rob so much more.

Robbo · 08-07-2006 02:26AM

Deleted User wrote:

Cuirt,Gort or Corrib?

Nah, the one for the cow college.

sturgo · 08-07-2006 11:21AM

I worked in a bar in Australia where me and some of the bartenders had a compition going on who could sell the most amount drinks without alcohol. It quickly got out of hand when it came to cocktails. We were selling alcohol-free Cosmopolitans (which is basically cranberry juice and lime juice) for about €10 a pop. To our amazment nobody noticed.

In a very short period of time we were far drunker than any of the customers. To be honest I could write a book on the amount of fúcked up shít I've seen working in bars over the years. I rember I sold a guy a handful of ice for $3.

Terry · 08-07-2006 11:50AM

Robbo wrote:

Nah, the one for the cow college.

bovine university?

whiskeyman · 08-07-2006 01:04PM

julep wrote:

bovine university?

nope, I think it's the udder one...

sturgo wrote:

It quickly got out of hand when it came to cocktails. We were selling alcohol-free Cosmopolitans (which is basically cranberry juice and lime juice) for about €10 a pop. To our amazment nobody noticed.

That's class! I'd say after a certain time, the punters wouldnt know anyway.

Confessions of a [insert job title]

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