Is this most inhumane over-reaction ever?

Brian Capture · 2006-06-20 22:32:31

My next door neighbour was over earlier. His sister is 30 and due to get married next November. She has been going out with the same guy for 12 years. She got pregnant a few weeks ago and last weekend they decided to tell their respective families. The boyfriend's family were overjoyed at the news. Her/my neighbour's…

Comments

#32 21-06-2006 10:15AM

seamus

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,173 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2001

Posts: 66931

82? Pfft, screw her, she'll be dead soon.

I don't think this as big an issue anymore. My brother's mate had a child for a few years before they got married. The child acted as the ring bearer at their wedding IIRC.

0
#33 21-06-2006 10:37AM

Funsterdelux

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,376 ✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2005

Posts: 3278

seamus wrote:

82? Pfft, screw her, she'll be dead soon.

Yeah, but remember they have a direct line with upstairs!

0
#34 21-06-2006 12:19PM

Evil_Bilbo

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 481 ✭✭

Join Date: January 2004

Posts: 453

ah - there's an awful lot o gobdaws like this out there - fortunately though they are dying out. A friend of mine told her mother she was moving in (just moving in) with her boyfriend of 8 years (who she'd been secretely living with for about 5), and the mother said "no one will touch you now". Like - what the hell?

a neighbour of mine (devout catholic) was distraught to find out her son was gay. Eventually learned to deal with it, but was just afraid he might not get into heaven after he died. Went to the local priest to ask him, and the priest told her "he's going straight to hell - STRAIGHT TO HELL" - what a thing to tell the woman - you'd think "oh we're all god's children" or something along those lines wouldve been more appropriate, but no. True story. For these old-school catholics hell is very real, and to think that her whole family would be in heaven while her son was going to hell drove her demented.

still though - that priest - what a pr!ck.

0
#35 21-06-2006 12:25PM

grimloch

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,688 ✭✭✭

Join Date: June 2004

Posts: 3585

Pfft, one of my cousins recently had a baby with their partner and my grandmother, who has been nothing but a devout Catholic for all 85 or so years of her life was one of the first to congratulate them.

No problems with priests or anthing for the christening ceremony either.

0
#36 21-06-2006 12:33PM

~Leanne~

Closed Accounts Posts: 538 ✭✭✭

Join Date: October 2005

Posts: 524

Evil_Bilbo wrote:

Went to the local priest to ask him, and the priest told her "he's going straight to hell - STRAIGHT TO HELL" - what a thing to tell the woman

Such a thing to say just because some-one is gay!
And what about the other priests - are they not going to hell for the awful things they did to young boys???? Sorry to bring such a subject up - but they can be right hipocrites when they want to be!! :rolleyes:

0
Advertisement
#37 21-06-2006 12:34PM

um7y1h83ge06nx

Closed Accounts Posts: 5,029 ✭✭✭

Join Date: September 2005

Posts: 4720

Old Catholic Ireland is dead yet, read this thread from PI:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2054946637

Particularly see the last comment from Lust4Life.

0
#38 21-06-2006 01:13PM

TerrorFirmer

Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: February 2005

Posts: 28578

My girlfriends grandmother is like that. She once told her we'd both burn in hell forever if we merely lived together before we were married.

Imagine what she'd say if my girlfriend got pregnant....

0
#39 21-06-2006 01:27PM

Hagar

Closed Accounts Posts: 16,786 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: April 2002

Posts: 15099

monkeyfudge wrote:

2 of my cousins had problems with priests because they were pregnant when getting married.

I didn't know pregnant priests could get married, I didn't even know they could get pregnant...

0
#40 21-06-2006 01:37PM

Dudess

Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 35866

simu wrote:

I agree. I'm pregnant and not married and no one has given me any 'tude tbh! In fact, people seem to think it's great!

Hey Simu! Congratulations girl! When you due?

0
#41 21-06-2006 01:59PM

bonkey

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,443 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: April 2001

Posts: 14635

Brian Capture wrote:

Isn't that some Christian attitude? Would rather see her grand-niece get a terminal illness than 'shame the neighbours' with a pregnancy?

It is indeed "some Christian attitude".

My reaction would be simple - tell her she's not invited to the wedding, nor the christening and if it makes her feel better she could consider the grand-niece to have died from cancer rather than to merely have caught it.

Either which way, I'd have little (if anything) more to do with her until such times as she apologised.

jc

0
Advertisement
#42 21-06-2006 02:25PM

Dudess

Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 35866

"Oh, but at this hour of her life she shouldn't be challenged." :rolleyes:
Hate that ****. A vicious, hurtful remark is a vicious, hurtful remark, irrespective of what age the person is.

0
#43 21-06-2006 02:27PM

Surrender

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 211 ✭✭

Join Date: May 2006

Posts: 187

Brian Capture wrote:

The parents were tut-tutting about how they would tell the mother's aunt, a very conservative woman of 82 years of age. They invited her over for lunch and broke the news to her.

Her reaction:

'I'd rather you told me she had cancer'.

Shoot the old bat!

0
#44 21-06-2006 02:56PM

Zulu

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,967 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2003

Posts: 10460

Well it's problem really - she'll have to justify that comment soon.

0
#45 21-06-2006 03:00PM

Dudess

Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 35866

I know of a girl who sadly lost her baby. Then when she was going to the priest to discuss funeral arrangements, he said to her something along the lines of "now you do know why this happened, don't you? God is punishing you for getting pregnant outside of marriage." So I can see where Monkeyfudge is coming from. It's rare but it's still out there.
As for Firespinner's insistence that we don't rush to judge the elderly woman - sure, if those views on sex before marriage, having children out of wedlock etc, have been entrenched in her for decades, then she can't be expected to just let them go. But the point is, she said she'd prefer to have been told the girl had cancer - it was the sheer nastiness of the comment. I think those are grounds enough to rush to judgement.
J.R. Hartley, sorry to hear about what you're going through.

0
#46 21-06-2006 03:12PM

bonkey

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,443 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: April 2001

Posts: 14635

Dudess wrote:

"Oh, but at this hour of her life she shouldn't be challenged." :rolleyes:
Hate that ****. A vicious, hurtful remark is a vicious, hurtful remark, irrespective of what age the person is.

Its true that at this hour of her life she shouldn't be challenged.

She should also have learned by this hour in her life how to be civil, thoughful to others, and (above-all) forgiving.
If she hasn't learned those lessens by that hour of her life, I can't see how I can reasonably be expected ot have learned them by this hour in mine....and they'd be the only traits that would prevent me from challenging her in response to her comments.

Its like this girl I knew. She had a tendancy to slap guys across the face for little-to-no provocation. This was always followed with "you should never hit a lady". Once, she tried this on someone who responded "a lady wouldn't have slapped me" and gave her a slap back.

0
#47 21-06-2006 05:59PM

emeraldstar

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,383 ✭✭✭

Join Date: September 2005

Posts: 5302

that aunt isn't worth two seconds of her time. I hope she didn't take her opinion to heart, she's definately not worth it. I'd cut her out of my life completely.

0
#48 21-06-2006 07:08PM

Brian Capture

Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 827 ✭✭✭

Join Date: May 2006

Posts: 768

emeraldstar wrote:

that aunt isn't worth two seconds of her time. I hope she didn't take her opinion to heart, she's definately not worth it. I'd cut her out of my life completely.

The girl doesn't know. She wasn't there when the grand-aunt came out with that comment.
Her brother is wondering whether to say it to her or not.

0
#49 21-06-2006 07:20PM

padi89

Closed Accounts Posts: 2,478 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2006

Posts: 2409

She would rather a potential death, than a new life in her family??????????

Let her off.Dont let anyone tell you the "oh well in her times spiel" its bullsh1t.My Gran passed away a few years ago at the age of ninety she was a great woman.My sister had kids young,very young in fact and out of marrige.My Gran who was a devout Catholic,wouldnt miss mass or prayers for her life, had so much love for the kids and my sister.

0
#50 21-06-2006 08:29PM

Dudess

Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 35866

Brian Capture wrote:

The girl doesn't know. She wasn't there when the grand-aunt came out with that comment.
Her brother is wondering whether to say it to her or not.

Obviously that's up to him, but would there really be any benefit in telling her exactly what was said? She might be able to take it in her stride, but she might also be terribly hurt.

0
#51 21-06-2006 10:38PM

tallus

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,324 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2005

Posts: 5943

One of My sisters got married over ten years back despite having a three year old child, and the priest was grand, not a bother on him.
I dont see it being a catholic thing the way the oul bag reacted, it's just f*cking nastiness, people can use religion to *try* to justify crap like that but in the end if someone is a decent person they wont let something like religion colour their judgement.

0
Advertisement
#52 21-06-2006 11:59PM

BMH

Closed Accounts Posts: 804 ✭✭✭

Join Date: May 2006

Posts: 793

Punch her in the face and ask her to turn the other cheek.
Continue ad infinium.

0
#53 22-06-2006 12:20AM

simu

Closed Accounts Posts: 10,730 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: April 2003

Posts: 10119

Dudess wrote:

I know of a girl who sadly lost her baby. Then when she was going to the priest to discuss funeral arrangements, he said to her something along the lines of "now you do know why this happened, don't you? God is punishing you for getting pregnant outside of marriage." So I can see where Monkeyfudge is coming from. It's rare but it's still out there.

What a muppet. :mad:

(As for when I'm due - see sig! )

0
#54 22-06-2006 12:56AM

dubtom

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,084 ✭✭✭

Join Date: September 2005

Posts: 2787

alleepally wrote:

Why would you presume a priest would look down on you?

Have you been dead, why would a priest look down on you?
Because thats what they do.

0
#55 22-06-2006 01:52PM

Dudess

Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 35866

simu wrote:

(As for when I'm due - see sig! )

Yeah, that realisation hit me after I had asked you. Nice one! Many many congrats!

0
#56 22-06-2006 03:27PM

fits

Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 14,561 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: June 2005

Posts: 14127

Having people like that in my family, who're largely ignored. I'd kill the aunt with kindness, and ignore her antiquated views. Older people grew up in very different times, and some find it impossible to adjust to the modern way of life. It might happen some of us when we're older.

https://subscriptions.boards.ie
Subscribe and save boards.ie

0