A friend has just told me he has an Action Man stuck up his hole and cant get it out

Endurance Man · 10-06-2006 12:28PM

Boards will be a better place without the op.

Ciaran500 · 10-06-2006 12:32PM

Yeah good idea, lets ban anyone that tries to be funny ¬_¬

YeatsCounty · 10-06-2006 12:34PM

Best. Thread. Title. Ever.

As for a solution to this problem, tell your friend to eat a lot of food for the next few hours. That combined with the laxatives should see him make quite a significant "deposit" and hopefully Action Man will find it too much for him.

Or he could just stick a Dr. X figurine up there and let them battle it out until Action Man completes his mission (whatever that is!).

Supercell · 10-06-2006 12:45PM

Three Dulco-Lax then wait for them to work their magic in a few hours, Action Man will become Flash Gordon.

He will spend all of tonight/tomorrow on the jacks though, less embarissing than a trip to the A&E I suppose.

Bodhidharma · 10-06-2006 01:02PM

If i had an action figure up my hole, the last thing i would do is eat a lot or take a laxative.

The thing isn't going to come out because a turd is pushing it. You could do more damage that way. You could blow up like an overinflated watwer baloon.

I'd get some lubrication and somebody i trust with small hands.

BMH · 10-06-2006 01:12PM

Yeah, I can't imagine poo pushing it out. Unless the shpincter is closed around it, and you want to yank it out while it opens for a dump. I wouldn't really imagine exploding as opposed to the poo getting "filtered" by Action Man.

Dave! · 10-06-2006 01:26PM

I think it'd be a good idea to get some handy person to stick a screwdriver up there and try to disassemble action man whilst he (action man) is IN the colon. Then you can take him out limb by limb, thereby not tearing the ass to bits

Plug · 10-06-2006 01:27PM

He could try and take a few poppers:D

raheny red · 10-06-2006 01:28PM

qz wrote:

Would a barbie not have been, less aggressive on the ass?

Nah, too hairy

Rhyme · 10-06-2006 01:32PM

When i saw the thread title and the little symbol that says 'attachments' i really didnt want to click...

I'm weak.

Go to the doctor... or take him out piece by piece.

Riamfada · 10-06-2006 01:33PM

What he needs is a good build up behind there . Find away of creating some sort of pressure inside the colon before getting him to bend over and shoot the poor plastic sucker into the summer sky

YeAh! · 10-06-2006 01:35PM

Rhyme wrote:

When i saw the thread title and the little symbol that says 'attachments' i really didnt want to click...

I'm weak.

Go to the doctor... or take him out piece by piece.

Sounds like doctor is only option!, jees imagine the embarressment!

Degsy · 10-06-2006 01:38PM

Brian Capture wrote:

The Extreme Climber model i believe
There's a picture of that particular model attached.

Anyone know how he could remove the greatest hero of them all?

Go away out of that ya big spoofer ya!!;)

Nevyn · 10-06-2006 01:41PM

Not really drs are used to this type of things.

Really when will people learn that if they are going to indulge in anal play to use something that was desgined with that in mind or at least something that don't dissapear and get lodges up there.

I would say a hot bath and some lube and if that doesn't work then it is a trip to the hospital cos other wise he will wreck his rectum or tear the passage way so much so he could need stiches.

Well at least it was an action man and not an transformer, robots in disguisel; what a cunny disguise no it is not a anal dildo tis Analnus Prime.

Riamfada · 10-06-2006 01:45PM

You could say that Action Man is going to tear him a new A-hole !

Degsy · 10-06-2006 01:47PM

Grimes wrote:

You could say that Action Man is going to tear him a new A-hole !

Jesus wept....

BMH · 10-06-2006 02:21PM

Or...you could give it a good shove into the large intestine and let digestion work its wierd and wonderful ways.

Send an email to whoever runs that goatse site...I'd say they know.
(If you don't know what it is, don't look for it.
Seriously.)

Setun · 10-06-2006 02:28PM

Brian Capture wrote:

A friend has just told me he has an Action Man stuck up his hole and cant get it out

Yeah... A friend...

Only in the Noggin, eh?

MrJoeSoap · 10-06-2006 02:28PM

Funniest thread title ever.

BMH · 10-06-2006 02:30PM

Daddio wrote:

Yeah... A friend...

Only in the Noggin, eh?

Good point, if I had sent a toy on an adventure like that, I wouldn't ring up my friends with the details...

Riamfada · 10-06-2006 02:52PM

The "friend" wouldn't happen to be you by any chance would it?

Action Man 2006

Ruu_Old · 10-06-2006 02:57PM

Ah yes the "friend", go to a doctor and stop sitting here (its only going to go up further!) typing and posting pics of it OP

projectmayhem · 10-06-2006 04:14PM

KevIRL wrote:

LOL funniest thread title ive seen in a long time

yeah... i haven't laughed at a boards thread so much before

Grimes wrote:

You could say that Action Man is going to tear him a new A-hole !

wow.... just wow...

Brian Capture · 10-06-2006 04:19PM

Pepe LeFrits wrote:

So Brian, is your head still stuck in a fence or did you escape?

I escaped in the end.

Creamy Goodness · 10-06-2006 04:21PM

erm how the hell you gonna get to a doctor?

an action man is big, so unless he has some gansta style baggy pants it's gonna look like well um, he's got a stiff stool in his pants or you could dangle the legs outside your trousers.

emeraldstar · 10-06-2006 04:22PM

im gonna say the only thing i can think of to say about this thread....
ohh holy mother of the divine lord what a bleedin feckin gobsheen!!!

Brian Capture · 10-06-2006 04:22PM

The laxatives didn't work. To make matters worse he slipped on a mat in the bathroom and expelled the yellow river of China all over the lino.

His mother is home and he's asked her to drive him to a hospital.
Probably Vincents.

She's not pleased about how it got up there. He claims to have been itchy 'down there' and the action man was to scratch that itch. It all went horribly wrong.

takola · 10-06-2006 04:27PM

ROFL!!!! We'll thats one way to take care of an itch!!!!!

BMH · 10-06-2006 04:30PM

Thanks for the...detail.

spurious · 10-06-2006 04:32PM

He should have gone to the hospital in the first place. It certainly won't be the first such thing they've seen.

All joking apart, and I'm not quite sure why anyone would find it funny, he could have done himself a great deal of damage, and still might.

A friend has just told me he has an Action Man stuck up his hole and cant get it out

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