Drunk at work....

Roar · 08-11-2004 11:19AM #1

lads i just arrived at work and I'm hammered. woke up at quarter past nine, although my alarm was set for 7. got a cab to work, and now i reek of cheap booze and tic tacs.

anyone got any tips on how to appear completely sober for the rest of the day? i've been guzzling coffee and green Extra's and spraying myself with deodarant every five mins. and my boss is at the desk opposite!

this is gonna be the longest day ever..... :eek:

aidan_walsh · 08-11-2004 11:21AM

How to appear sober at work: Turn up to work sober in future. You'll never have to worry about faking it again!

Blitzkrieger · 08-11-2004 11:22AM

A good hour's sleep in the bog works wonders. Otherwise you'll start to perk up about half an hour before quitting time.

D!ve^Bomb! · 08-11-2004 11:22AM

ha ha.. thats sum funny $hit

ixoy · 08-11-2004 11:22AM

Your afternoon's going to be fun

Sleipnir · 08-11-2004 11:22AM

All you can do is remember that you're boss has turned up to work drunk at one time or another in the past. Everybody has.

Spalk0 · 08-11-2004 11:23AM

Been there before many times!....not really sure what you can do, keep drinking the coffee!Just gotta accept the fact your gonna look like a mess till the afternoon anyways!

PullMyFinger! · 08-11-2004 11:23AM

Coffee might just make you worse, always does with me when Im that fcuked. Drink loads of red bull and water and flush the crap out of your system.

gimmick · 08-11-2004 11:26AM

Speed. Lots of Speed*.

Pull a sicky.

I find the best way is always splash lots of cold water on your face every so often.

I take it you didnt just go to the cinema last night?

*gimmick does not endorse the use of illegal drugs.

magpie · 08-11-2004 11:26AM

Pick up a file / piece of paper and wander off looking purposeful. Head for the jacks and have a sleep on the throne. At lunch go out and get the biggest pub lunch available to humanity. Have another snooze in the jacks in the afternoon. Go home after another fulfilling day's work. Try to avoid going out on the lash on sunday nights.

climaxer · 08-11-2004 11:28AM

Its been a long time since I've done that but I remember a bottle of lucozade works wonders. Also get some food into you if you can. A roll with some rashers and sausages. I agree with drinking plenty of water too. I really don't envy you - its terrible. The worst I ever was was the morning after out xmas night out a few years ago. Not a nice feeling. Luckily we had a half day and everyone was hung over so we didn't have to do much.

woosaysdan · 08-11-2004 11:30AM

a large strawberry yogurt, loads of lucozade and water and someting to eat

okidoki987 · 08-11-2004 11:30AM

Keep the head down, do the work and try not to speak to anyone.
If somebody does come near you, leg it to the bog and sit in there for 10 mins, hopefully they will be gone by the time you return.
E-mail anybody you needed to speak to.
Mints and freash breath spray never go wrong.

Spalk0 · 08-11-2004 11:33AM

Yeah a big fry-up usually does the trick!.....if it doesnt make you sick first!hehe

Mighty_Mouse · 08-11-2004 11:39AM

Eye-drops, eye-drops, eye-drops ........................

Roar · 08-11-2004 11:43AM

gimmick wrote:

I take it you didnt just go to the cinema last night?

Bad santa was sold out so the obvious thing to do after that wasgo to the pub for five hours

dahamsta · 08-11-2004 11:49AM

Blitzkrieger wrote:

A good hour's sleep in the bog works wonders.

I'm afraid I have to concur. Bring a bottle of water and some alka-seltzer with you.

Kêrmêttê · 08-11-2004 11:58AM

Blitzkrieger wrote:

A good hour's sleep in the bog works wonders. Otherwise you'll start to perk up about half an hour before quitting time.

I have to agree with this.
You're gonna look like you were dragged backwards through a hedge until lunchtime.
A massive attack of the sleepies with strike just after lunchtime.
You will start to feel vaguely human again roughly an hour or half an hour before you're due to go home.
Best of luck dude!

seamus · 08-11-2004 12:00PM

Bottle of lucozade sport, salad sandwich and tonnes of water.

Right as rain in no time.

You'll smell like cheap booze all day though, nothing can be done about that.

ixoy · 08-11-2004 12:06PM

I also vote for a sleep in the bogs for ya. It's what I have to do when wrecked after a night out. We also have showers on some floors where people are less likely to disturb you and you can curl up on the floor. Just go in, set your phone's alarm, and get even 10-15 minutes kip.

Take a greasy lunch if you can and make sure you drink plenty of fluids. Whenever I'm knackered, I drink cup after cup of water, particularly in the afternoon when I'm at my worst. Sometimes then, after toddling home, I collapse into bed and have a nice nap.

See drink is bad. I got by on three pints last night and I'm just a little sleepy now but I'll be able to manage. I stopped in time... this time anyway...

KlodaX · 08-11-2004 12:06PM

Kêrmêtt&#234 wrote:

You're gonna look like you were dragged backwards through a hedge until lunchtime.

Untill lunchtime? whenever I've arrived to work straight from the night before (this happens surprisingly often) I generally don't sober up till lunchtime.

2 O'Clock is when the fun time begins. You probably don't really notice that you are at work yet. You will probably forget how you got to work by this evening

I suggest leaving the coffee alone... enjoy being out of while you can.. *start on the water now*... have a sausage sandwich for lunch with a coffee and pain killers *which contain caffine* .... and just sit very quietly for the afternoon. Hope that no one notices.

If you can grab a quick shower at lunchtime that would be great also... cause I can smell you from here!

yossarin · 08-11-2004 12:07PM

sugar in water and a kip in the toilet.

keep your head down.
good luck soldier.

Ph3n0m · 08-11-2004 12:10PM

I recommend the following

2 cans of red bull
1 ltr bottle of water
1 immensely full breakfast roll - or failing that a toasted sausage and cheese sandwich

consume in the following order
red bull, some water, breakfast roll, red bull, rest of water, repeat intake of water throughout day

now you will be wired for the rest of the day or your guts will fall out when you sneeze - enjoy

Zombienosh · 08-11-2004 12:10PM

i'd just go home sick.......

its no fun being there drunk or stoned - or being green.

from experience i speak...

Zulu · 08-11-2004 12:12PM

You can't beat the Bottle of Lucozade sport. Food will settle the tummy.
Alka-Seltzer for the hangover. (Don't be afraid to put Alka-Seltzer in the Lucozade)

Other than that, sleep is the only thing, and since thats not too much of an option, it time to start slacking.

Thing about drink and work is, you need to slack today. If you try to get work done, you'll screw things up and create more work for yourself tomorrow. The responsible thing to do today is to worm and weasel your ways out of anything/everything. If you can that a half day or knock off early - start planning your escape.

Good luck, you'll need it.

Spalk0 · 08-11-2004 12:12PM

Oh Dear god no not red bull!......that **** is horrid!

Kêrmêttê · 08-11-2004 12:39PM

KlodaX wrote:

Untill lunchtime? whenever I've arrived to work straight from the night before (this happens surprisingly often) I generally don't sober up till lunchtime.

That's exactly what I meant :rolleyes:

Tom Dunne · 08-11-2004 12:40PM

Granny Smith, your only woman.

Have a Granny Smith apple - get's the smell of drink off your breath. Also de-furries the tongue.

I would also heartily endorse Lucozade Sport and lots of water.

Stark · 08-11-2004 12:42PM

Aye.

Fish oil tablets if you have them are great I think, they don't sober you up but do seem to lubricate your sandpapered brain (or something

), anyway they make my head feel good

If you don't have them, go for the fry-up, many places fry the stuff in oil.

Damn, I wish I'd thought of ixoy's "curl up in the showers" suggestion. Sounds icky, but with some of my hangovers, it would definitely have been an option. I found I never managed to sleep in the bogs.

Chad ghostal · 08-11-2004 02:09PM

id suggest you follow the above advice,
food, (no water), lots of lucozade sport and if you can manage it, id try and nip another drink,

itll keep you going after lunch, when you will begin to falter,
id also advise nap in toilet

going home is a bad idea, cause everyone will know your going home because of hangover and it looks crappy..(this only applies if you in a "real" job)

ferdi · 08-11-2004 02:39PM

leave the office for 5 mins, claiming to be getting lunch or something, go to an offie, buy naggin of cheapest nastiest vodka, spray yourself with it (you will now obviously stink off booze) and claim that some bum/drunk/scumbag spilled it over you on the road.

Drunk at work....

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