teacher smacking a child!

lisa.c · 08-09-2004 11:43PM #1

i know this should probably be in the parenting forum but i dont feel ill get enough response so ill post it here!

does any one know what the law is when it comes to a pre/playschool teacher smacking your child?

i'm sure its not allowed but if it happened what can you do about it?

tba · 08-09-2004 11:46PM

if they hit your kid you tell the guards, its child abuse

impr0v · 08-09-2004 11:48PM

What did you do to make the teacher angry Lisa?

lisa.c · 08-09-2004 11:56PM

the the child is almost 3. would he be believed if i made a complaint!
what would happen if i did complain?
i know kids can have wild imaginations and make up stuff , but its only his 3rd day of play school.

ChipZilla · 09-09-2004 12:08AM

Corporal punishment/smacking somebody is covered by the Non-Fatal Offences Against the Person Act, 1997. Which would make it a matter for the cops. A 3-year old kid would hardly make up something like that...

Quatre Mains · 09-09-2004 12:18AM

Tough call to make, sounds like big dilemna for you! If you do decide not to go to the cops then go to the school at least and confront them over it. Even if the kid turns out to be lying they will understand why you're upset over the matter. Only tip I would have is to be constructive, making threats to sue for a 'hewige bleedin clayim" could make you look like a fake. Best of luck

lisa.c · 09-09-2004 09:05AM

ya not sure wether to confront her or not.. dont want my son to be put in a worse situation by saying something.

i am quite upset about it but dont know wether i should make a deal out of it or just let it go.

is it a big deal or am i just bein thick about it?

ChipZilla · 09-09-2004 09:11AM

Have a word with the teacher - say that your kid has told you he was smacked,that you would like an explanation as your son would have no reason to lie about this, and that if you hear of the same thing happening again you will take legal advice and get the cops involved.

That should put the sh1ts up them in any case...

Hagar · 09-09-2004 09:39AM

Confrontation, head on, no holds barred, is the only course of action.
People of my generation were abused for years because nobody stood up for us.
Don't let it happen to your child.

da_deadman · 09-09-2004 09:48AM

Yeah, I think you should talk to them about it. It is against the law, and for good reason, and you need to find out what happened. If it happens again, then you have no option but to go to the police. I can understand, from helping my aunt who runs a playschool, that it can be tough to handle a lot of children like that but if the person can't handle it then she is in the wrong job. It's probably better not to be too confrontational and to discuss the matter but tell the teacher that if it does happen again then you will have to take the matter further...

...of course if it was my child I would have to be restrained from a bit of 'corporal punishment' on the teacher...

ChipZilla · 09-09-2004 09:52AM

da_deadman wrote:

...of course if it was my child I would have to be restrained from a bit of 'corporal punishment' on the teacher...

That was my first thought as well.

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 10:17AM

This is one law I've never understood. Sure, there was plenty of abuse of corporal punishment but at the same time, as a principle it worked didn't it? Kid acts up, kid gets slapped, kid doesn't do it again. Absolutely no harm in a slap across the arse when a child misbehaves. My parents did it to me and I'll do it to my kids if I ever have any.

da_deadman · 09-09-2004 10:26AM

Yes and I'd tend to agree with you Sleepy, but the problem here is that it was the teacher who slapped the child, and not the parent. It is not up to the teacher to discipline the child this way. I think that the law is correct when it comes to children being slapped by anyone other then their own parents.
Remember when George Bush spanked Bart Simpson? Well, Homer was right when he said it was his right to be able to raise a disobedient smart-alecky kid.

IgnatiusJRiley · 09-09-2004 10:27AM

Sleepy wrote:

This is one law I've never understood. Sure, there was plenty of abuse of corporal punishment but at the same time, as a principle it worked didn't it? Kid acts up, kid gets slapped, kid doesn't do it again. Absolutely no harm in a slap across the arse when a child misbehaves. My parents did it to me and I'll do it to my kids if I ever have any.

Exactly! And imagine having 10 or 15 of the little br... darlings! Slap one of them and the rest might learn something as well!!

ChipZilla · 09-09-2004 10:37AM

Sleepy wrote:

This is one law I've never understood. Sure, there was plenty of abuse of corporal punishment but at the same time, as a principle it worked didn't it? Kid acts up, kid gets slapped, kid doesn't do it again. Absolutely no harm in a slap across the arse when a child misbehaves.

What's not to understand, unless you're a caveman? It's the same reason you can't punch your missus in the jaw or slap her in the face when she acts up. :rolleyes:

Big people hitting smaller people can cause damage - physical and mental.

Sleepy wrote:

My parents did it to me and I'll do it to my kids if I ever have any.

Best of luck with that....

Victor · 09-09-2004 10:51AM

IgnatiusJRiley wrote:

Slap one of them and the rest might learn something as well!!

That hitting people makes you the Alpha Male?

Bard · 09-09-2004 10:56AM

lisa.c wrote:

ya not sure wether to confront her or not.. dont want my son to be put in a worse situation by saying something.

i am quite upset about it but dont know wether i should make a deal out of it or just let it go.

is it a big deal or am i just bein thick about it?

I'd certainly consider it a big deal if anyone ever laid a hand on any child of mine.

If it were me, I'd confront the teacher, acting at the time like it isn't a big deal - so she's more likely to admit when asked that she hit my child - then when she does, take the matter straight to the school management and threaten to involve the authorities if she ever does it again.

BrookieD · 09-09-2004 10:56AM

there is now way anybody should be able to smack a small child, there are other ways to deal with problems from small tots. If any body even raised a hand to my son there would be hell to pay.

Lenny · 09-09-2004 10:58AM

Little ****ebag proberly deserved the little slap

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 11:18AM

ChipZilla wrote:

What's not to understand, unless you're a caveman? It's the same reason you can't punch your missus in the jaw or slap her in the face when she acts up. :rolleyes:

Big people hitting smaller people can cause damage - physical and mental.

Best of luck with that....

Ah, the bleeding heart liberal rears it's head. Slapping children is not inherantly an evil thing. It teaches discipline and it works. It's attitudes like yours which has the country in such a state with so many kids running riot and behaving like spoilt brats because they have been spoiled: by parents who want to be their best mate instead of being their parents.

da_deadman wrote:

Yes and I'd tend to agree with you Sleepy, but the problem here is that it was the teacher who slapped the child, and not the parent. It is not up to the teacher to discipline the child this way. I think that the law is correct when it comes to children being slapped by anyone other then their own parents.
Remember when George Bush spanked Bart Simpson? Well, Homer was right when he said it was his right to be able to raise a disobedient smart-alecky kid.

Fair enough, under our current legal system a teacher isn't allowed to slap a child so your advice is probably the best in these circumstances. However, we disagree entirely on you last sentance. Being a parent should be a privelege and responsibility, not a right. I don't think it's anyone's right to raise "a disobedient smart-alecky kid", it's not fair to the child or society in general to drag children up in that manner.

ChipZilla · 09-09-2004 11:27AM

Sleepy wrote:

Ah, the bleeding heart liberal rears it's head. Slapping children is not inherantly an evil thing. It teaches discipline and it works. It's attitudes like yours which has the country in such a state with so many kids running riot and behaving like spoilt brats because they have been spoiled: by parents who want to be their best mate instead of being their parents.

Ha ha, right you are sleepy. You don't even have kids and already you're an expert on disciplining them?

I'm starting to think you should be named after one of the other of the Seven Dwarves instead of sleepy... And I don't mean doc, happy, sneezy or bashful.

:rolleyes:

da_deadman · 09-09-2004 11:35AM

Having children, and raising them, is a privelege and a responsibility. As a parent your first duty is to your children and not to yourself (until the child reaches adulthood). There are a lot of parents I know of who do not take this responsibility seriously enough. This is what has children 'running riot and behaving like spoilt brats'. It is not because they have not been slapped but more because their parents are too lazy to work on their responsibility to their children.
When I said it was his 'right' I was merely paraphrasing what Homer said, and I agree it is not a right to rear a child to be 'disobedient and smart-alecky' but I think it should be the parents right to choose how they discipline their own children (within the law). No other person, or authority, should ever be allowed to slap a child. It is not a means of getting a child to stop doing something, but merely a show of 'might is right', and that because I'm bigger and stronger than you then I can tell you what to do. This is not a good way to raise a child.

bandraoi · 09-09-2004 11:39AM

whoever said there is no way that a child of 3 would lie about something like that has never dealt with kids. Some children of 3 definitley would, and not even brats. Kids try out all sorts of different behaviours to see what they can get away with and at the age of 3, no matter how well brought up they're still trying out the full range.

Ask the teacher what happened before deciding what action to take.
The smack may indeed have been warranted and not just for bad behaviour.

Personally I think smacking is ok if the kid does something that's dangerous or that endangers somebody else. In that sort of a situation a short sharp shock can be necessary.

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 11:48AM

You don't need to have children to understand that slapping is a form of punishment that works. We were all children once ChipZilla. From my own experience, if I was slapped for doing something as a child, I was hesitant to do it again. Therefore, it works.

And if you look at your last post there's not a single argument there, just a few cheapshots at me. Very mature. Take a look at how da deadman argues for his case (holding the same position as yours, he makes points and arguments instead of just having a go at someone. You could learn something from that ChipZilla.

it should be the parents right to choose how they discipline their own children (within the law)

I'd agree with this, however, would you advocate the current position of some that would advocate banning a parent from slapping their child?

It is not a means of getting a child to stop doing something, but merely a show of 'might is right', and that because I'm bigger and stronger than you then I can tell you what to do.

While I can see the thinking behind this, I'm not inclined to agree with it. To me, it teaches children that actions have repercussions; misdeeds, punishments. The parent is already in the authorative role so by slapping a child it isn't saying "I'm in charge because I'm bigger", it's saying "what you're doing is wrong and you shouldn't do it again."

Bard · 09-09-2004 12:28PM

Sleepy wrote:

I'd agree with this, however, would you advocate the current position of some that would advocate banning a parent from slapping their child?

I certainly wouldn't advocate ANYONE slapping anyone ELSE's child.

lisa.c · 09-09-2004 12:31PM

well the way i see it is that no one absolutly no one has any authority to smack my son except me and his dad.

when he is in play school he is supposed to be cared for and educated not slapped.
if he is bold then punish him appropiatly by taking away privelages or his favourite game.
he's not even three yet.
i totally believe my son, he still has that innocence that children hold... he could'nt fib or lie to save his life - he dosent know how.

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 12:32PM

Once there was parental consent for corporal punishment in schools I wouldn't have a problem with it.

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 12:34PM

lisa.c wrote:

i totally believe my son, he still has that innocence that children hold... he could'nt fib or lie to save his life - he dosent know how.

He's going to be pulling the wool over your eyes for years isn't he?

lisa.c · 09-09-2004 12:35PM

sleepy you dont have kids, but when you do i'll tell you now you'll never tolerate any one else smacking them.

when i did'nt have my son i had your attitude but it all changes when you become a parent.

your first instinct as a parent is to protect.

lisa.c · 09-09-2004 12:39PM

have you ever heard of a childs innocence? some day you'll see it in your own kids.
i know my son dosent lie he never has. at his age they just dont know how and they certainly have no concept on how or what it is.

Sleepy · 09-09-2004 12:43PM

Sorry Lisa, but Children certainly know how to lie from that age. I know I did when I was that age.

And Lisa, if I'd given someone permission to slap my child (which I would be inclined to do) I'd hardly have a problem with them doing it. In the circumstances you describe, however, I'd be a bit pissed off alright. No point in storming in taking the head off the teacher though. As bandraoi says, there could be a perfectly rational explanation for it.

teacher smacking a child!

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