What's the etiquette here??

Just had a normal run of the mill bowel movement a half an hour ago...nothing interesting of note there....just a standard emptying of the guts.....

But I have passed some very hearty and healthy gas ever since then.....very loud, proud, dry wind with absolutely zero stink.....Immensely satisfying.......

Used up a load of old carrots and parsnips and made a hape of mash with that for the last couple of days...

Unsure if that explains anything.....

Whatever happened to Flash and Paddy Pintman? Gone to poo poo heaven or wha?

Had a bad experience recently Nevin, was over in Egypt on important company business.

Was waiting in Cairo airport and noticed a group of about 5 Irish men, mid sixties, 45/29 merchants

tanking up with ‘gallons’ of what looked like Guinness and being quite loud.

This continued on the plane and from the business part of the cabin I could hear the orders coming thick and fast.

Fcukers almost emptied the galleys of dhrink.

Anyway fast forward we’re in the baggage claim area, and there they were still like a mens shed group.

I decided to hit the pisser for some relief and as if by fcuking automation all five of them headed with purpose to the

same facility, three of them into the traps,slamming them shut.

The three started to drop their guts like belt-fed mortars, sounds of “Jaaaysus” and “Me fcuking guts is rotten”

One lad opened the door as I left and the pot looked like a Christmas cake was walked into the back of it.

And they blame DAA for the foul stench off the DAP shïtters.

Fcukking gutsers the lot of them

Coulld be correct padd, personally left a large backout of foul smelling sludge in my locals shïtters after todays gayam!

The douche who owns is a fcuuhker Dub fan and I couldn’t stomach his crowing for the next two weeks.

So after todays defeat for de Doobs, blew out two full arse cheeks of ripe scutthery midden which coated the furniture with a thin skein of military green cloying deposit.

Fcuker will have to shift that sharpish before she crusts up.

Fcukking scrote

Anyone see that programme the other night about the Seal Rescue place?

Wel, the semi-submerged fcuker that greeted me me when I lifted the lid in my preferred end of terrace stall earlier, looked like one of them Seals that was now ready to be released! Someone had obviously been in to log out before me and the flush wasn't man enough to shift flipper. I can only imagine he tried a couple of flushes and for the sake of modesty left the lid down before exiting.

I managed to get a seat a couple of stalls down and it wasn't long before I heard 'Ah Jaysus' when another punter opened the lid and discovered the same.

Cleaner was later seen exiting the facilities with mop and bucket and a non-too-pleased expression.

Good catch ST. Although in fairness it could've passed for a small dolphin calf too.

On reflection Mr T, I dunno..

Sounds too much like the wet bed events I soldiered through years ago with them cold water bottles..

I recommend a budgie smuggler and wash/rinse with intent each morning..

Nonsense Dr.

A magnificent erogenous interaction with said product.

Was in Arnotts today picking up a few bits and pieces for the upcoming holidays.

Had my lunch there and after a nice cup of coffee I needed a leak. Followed the signs for the men's downstairs and lads I have to say they are a 9 out of 10. Clean, comfortable, quiet and the traps are almost full height (floor to ceiling). Lovely posh handwash and good dryers.

I deducted a point for the rather flimsy toilet paper in the cubicles but other than that they were absolutely perfect.

Had one of the childers birthday party on saturday....suffice to say that yesterdays diet was abit of a shambles....leftover tuna sweetcorn sandwiches for breakfast followed by more birthday cake and rice krispie buns.....more of the same throughout the day...leftover cocktail sausages and nuggets etc...you get the idea.....

Roll on this morning and the inevitable brutal evacuation of the bowels in our ensuite....the clean up was so bad I gave up wiping my arse.... I thought "fùck this, ill have another shower instead"....with the smell of Radox "Revitalise" shower gel combining with the horrendous bang off the earlier shìte (enough to stop a baby hippo in its tracks)....seeping out into the bedroom....

To top it off the wife wanted to show off her walk in wardrobe, shoes etc to her mother who just arrived to mind the child......i quickly had to nip that in the bud...cue filthy daggers from the missus....im in the bad books now for the day.....

And I only trying to help the environment by not wasting food....

The customer definitely comes first in that shop.