Dental plan!

Loafing Oaf · 25-04-2021 9:33pm

And that's the greatest thing ever written. Are you crazy? I can't believe a play where every character is murdered could be so boring!

Son, it's not only a great play, but also became a great movie called Ghostbusters.

RobbingBandit · 26-04-2021 8:39am

Homer: When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, hehehehe they're on TV!

razorblunt · 26-04-2021 12:28pm

Saw a rare gem yesterday, a later season episode that had so many good quotes in it:

Homer: Marge, remember when we were talking about our worst fears?
Marge: Uh-huh.
Homer: And mine was snakes, and yours was...?
Marge: Never being a grandmother.
Homer: Really? I thought it was Lisa with a beard of bees. Well, whatever, brace yourself.

----

Moe: Listen, Homer: in the back room, I got these super-tough Africanized bees. I saw this ad in a gentleman's magazine for excited African honeys and that's what they sent me. If we could combine them with Lisa's bees, it would make them strong enough to survive any environment.
Homer: But how are we supposed to combine the DNA of two strains of the same species?
Moe: Actually, Homer... [whispers]
Homer: [gasps] You and me?
Moe: No, the bees!
Homer: Oh, yeah, yeah, that's what I meant, too. I... have no... inclination.

----

Mayor Quimby: First, one announcement: I regret to inform you we are not offering childcare tonight. I don't know who that guy was you were leaving your kids with.

Loafing Oaf · 26-04-2021 1:12pm

Marge : He's had a heart-attack! Quick someone do CPR!

Homer Simpson : [singing] I see a bad moon rising...

Glenster · 27-04-2021 11:30am

THIS TOWN IS UNDER THE STRANGLEHOLD OF A FEW TIE-DYED TREE HUGGERS WHO WOULD RATHER PLAY HACKY SACK THAN LOCK UP THE HOMELESS.

Loafing Oaf · 28-04-2021 12:16am

Bart: She put a spell on me!
Must... drop... pantaloons.

Marge: Let's come to our senses, everyone.
This witch hunt is turning into a circus.

RobbingBandit · 28-04-2021 6:57am

Loafing Oaf wrote: »

Marge : He's had a heart-attack! Quick someone do CPR!

Homer Simpson : [singing] I see a bad moon rising...

No no that's CCR

silliussoddius · 30-04-2021 4:15pm

I don’t like the park, Smithers. Too many fat children

AndrewJRenko · 08-05-2021 5:39pm

Roger Myers: Here's a witty rejoinder for ya!

Loafing Oaf · 08-05-2021 6:28pm

silliussoddius · 09-05-2021 9:29pm

Hee hee. The joke’s on Flanders. I’ll be dead this time tomorrow.

Loafing Oaf · 09-05-2021 10:07pm

↑ reminds me

Beanntraigheach · 11-05-2021 6:29pm

Well McGarnagle, Billy is DEAD!
They slit his throat from ear to ear.

RobbingBandit · 11-05-2021 7:15pm

McGarnagle:“Hey, I’m trying to eat lunch here!”.

Santan · 11-05-2021 7:17pm

RobbingBandit wrote: »

McGarnagle:“Hey, I’m trying to eat lunch here!”.

McGarnagle is a perfectly cromulent detective

punisher5112 · 11-05-2021 7:56pm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOk4hQXbGDs

Loafing Oaf · 14-05-2021 2:12pm

silliussoddius · 14-05-2021 2:27pm

I haven't had a front row seat since my Moonie wedding.

Riddle101 · 20-05-2021 5:51pm

"I can tell the difference between "butter" and "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter"
"No you can't Mister Simpson, no-one can!"

EagererBeaver · 21-05-2021 10:42am

I don't recall saying "good luck".

razorblunt · 21-05-2021 11:13am

"You got the dud.
<slow smile>
He looks like you pointdexter"

The slow smile is what makes that.

Loafing Oaf · 22-05-2021 12:48pm

AndrewJRenko · 22-05-2021 3:27pm

Krusty to G.K Willington as Maitre D (aka Groundskeeper Willie): Hey I don’t need your charity titters. Now meet my girlfriend Charity Titters!

Charity tried to lift up her bra...

Krusty: No not yet! Wait until we get to the booth!

Loafing Oaf · 23-05-2021 10:50pm

Purple is a Fruit · 26-05-2021 9:31pm

Watching thing about Irangate.

Ah Oliver North - he was just poured into that uniform...

Papa_Bear · 26-05-2021 10:51pm

come on come on crack those atoms

you turn out those pockets

ATOMS

one two three four, six of them

take him away!

26-05-2021 11:12pm

Franchise seller presenting at an Expo:

"You'll be on a rocket ship to the moon..... And while you're there, will you bring back some of that nice green moonnnnn money for me? Royce McCucheon"

Homer: "No deal McCutcheon that moon money is MINE".

Loafing Oaf · 28-05-2021 12:10am

This so-called "new religion" is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants designed to take away the money of fools. Let us say the Lord's prayer forty times, but first let's pass the collection plate.

silliussoddius · 03-06-2021 3:20pm

Have I ever told you kids about the 60s?

Loafing Oaf · 03-06-2021 3:34pm

Thargor · 03-06-2021 5:24pm

Good tune:

Psychlops · 03-06-2021 5:51pm

Anybody got that joke video of someone singing god save the queen only for him to be hit over the back & come out ye black & tans played? I think it was on Ireland simpsons fans but I cant find it.

New Home · 03-06-2021 9:11pm

Loafing Oaf · 03-06-2021 9:27pm

That's where I saw the leprechaun. He told me to burn things.

briany · 03-06-2021 11:58pm

This thread is in danger of becoming stale. I'm taking it to strange new places.

Lisa needs braces.

silliussoddius · 04-06-2021 12:04am

And the whole steel mill was gay!

Realt Dearg Sec · 04-06-2021 1:22am

briany wrote: »

This thread is in danger of becoming stale. I'm taking it to strange new places.

Lisa needs braces.

Burp!

Realt Dearg Sec · 04-06-2021 1:30am

silliussoddius wrote: »

And the whole steel mill was gay!

Ain't you heard? Whole steel industry's gay. And you know what else?

Broadway.

briany · 04-06-2021 1:33am

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

Burp!

Numbah eight

EagererBeaver · 04-06-2021 7:35am

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

Ain't you heard? Whole steel industry's gay. And you know what else?

Broadway.

There's a spark in my hair, get it out, get it out!

Oh, be nice!

Dad, why'd you take me to a gay steel mill?

I don't know.

Loafing Oaf · 04-06-2021 10:10am

Realt Dearg Sec · 04-06-2021 2:59pm

This calls for an aggressive trading strategy.

"Good idea, sir."

Take 50% of my money, and put it in the blue chips- Transatlantic Zeppelin, Amalgamated Spats, Congreve's Inflammable Powders, U.S. Hay...and sink the rest into that up-and-coming Baltimore opera hat company.

(I love any scene where burns talks like it's the 1920s, like when he says that in a car the right pedal is the velocitator and the left is the deceleratrix)

ohnonotgmail · 04-06-2021 3:06pm

I'd like to send this letter to the Prussian Consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 auto-gyro?

silliussoddius · 04-06-2021 3:06pm

You there, fill it up with petroleum distillate, and re-vulcanize my tires, post-haste

ohnonotgmail · 04-06-2021 3:17pm

Ah! A candy shop. Yes. I'll take two pounds of Bristol's toffee. Oh, and don't wrap it too tightly. I'm hungry now. [the vending machine doesn't do anything] You've made a powerful enemy today, my friend.

Loafing Oaf · 05-06-2021 12:00am

Homer: These lima beans are even better than the ones we had for breakfast and lunch! Oh! A lima bean that looks just like the Leader! I'll put it with the others.

Marge: Homer, you know I always try to put the best face on everything, but THERE'S NO FACE ON THAT DAMN BEAN!

I reckon the Movementarians episode is worthy of a thread of its own...

EagererBeaver · 05-06-2021 12:28am

Loafing Oaf wrote: »

Homer: These lima beans are even better than the ones we had for breakfast and lunch! Oh! A lima bean that looks just like the Leader! I'll put it with the others.

Marge: Homer, you know I always try to put the best face on everything, but THERE'S NO FACE ON THAT DAMN BEAN!

I reckon the Movementarians episode is worthy of a thread of its own...

And when IS this Movementarians thread?

Loafing Oaf · 05-06-2021 11:31am

EagererBeaver wrote: »

And when IS this Movementarians thread?

I fear the wrath of our Perfect Leaders the mods if I started such a niche thread...

RobbingBandit · 06-06-2021 8:31am

Homer no function beer well without

Rawr · 06-06-2021 9:56am

Loafing Oaf wrote: »

I fear the wrath of our Perfect Leaders the mods if I started such a niche thread...

And I for one welcome our current forum overlords.
I’d like to remind them that as a trusted Boardsie, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground comment moderation caves.

Dental plan!

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