Should I report naughty friend

Piehead · 11-10-2020 08:40AM #1

A co-worker who is a buddy of mine has admitted to fapping off to the pictures on zoom calls of female attendees when they are talking. Not everyone has their camera on so he can’t been seen as his is off (he claims it’s broken). Nevertheless its seems somewhat deviant behaviour and must be against some work policy. Should I report to HR? May be just my word against him though?

bobbysands81 · 11-10-2020 08:41AM

Piehead wrote: »

A co-worker who is a buddy of mine has admitted to fapping off to the pictures on zoom calls of female attendees when they are talking. Not everyone has their camera on so he can’t been seen as his is off (he claims it’s broken). Nevertheless its seems somewhat deviant behaviour and must be against some work policy. Should I report to HR? May be just my word against him though?

How do you prove it happened?

Is it just your word against his?

Gruffalux · 11-10-2020 08:47AM

Perfect place for this joke! Someone replied to this tweet with "Worst Zoom call ever."
Maybe you could use this for aversion therapy on your libidinous pal?

https://twitter.com/GSpellchecker/status/1314838273517330432?s=19

Pauliedragon · 11-10-2020 08:58AM

Piehead wrote: »

A co-worker who is a buddy of mine has admitted to fapping off to the pictures on zoom calls of female attendees when they are talking. Not everyone has their camera on so he can’t been seen as his is off (he claims it’s broken). Nevertheless its seems somewhat deviant behaviour and must be against some work policy. Should I report to HR? May be just my word against him though?

I would just stay out of it. Whilst bizarre behaviour it's not crime of the century and what are HR going to do anyway. Tell your buddy there's a heap of free porn out there he can avail of without the guilt of pulling his timber to some young wan he gets his jellies off bending over the desk or shelf. There's loads of escorts around if he's that horney.

screamer · 11-10-2020 09:03AM

Next zoom call message him and tell him you can see him on screen that his camera must be glitchy or something. It’s very risky and frankly disgusting behaviour TBH. If the camera does turn on, and zoom can be glitchy, he’ll be in right trouble.

Gregor Samsa · 11-10-2020 09:20AM

Get everyone to wear masks of his mother. It’ll either put a stop to it, or reveal bigger issues.

ToxicPaddy · 11-10-2020 09:23AM

Gregor Samsa wrote: »

Get everyone to wear masks of his mother. It’ll either put a stop to it, or reveal bigger issues.

Wanderer2010 · 11-10-2020 09:41AM

Absolutely none of your business. Stay out of it and do your own work.

MadDog76 · 11-10-2020 09:44AM

It's a w@nk, no harm done ........ what's the world coming to, everything has to be an issue these days!

alchemist33 · 11-10-2020 09:45AM

As long as its legal, I don't think it's anyone's business what someone masturbates to. When they do it might be a different matter.

bobbysands81 · 11-10-2020 09:47AM

MadDog76 wrote: »

It's a w@nk, no harm done ........ what's the world coming to, everything has to be an issue these days!

Having a **** during work to pictures of girls that are talking at that time is not what many would deem normal behaviour.

Wanderer2010 · 11-10-2020 09:48AM

Mr.S wrote: »

Ahh yes let's just ignore blatant sexual misconduct in the workplace.

The guy is a creep and if OP's post is genuine, should be told to management. It's weird as ****.

But it doesnt affect his work either way. Of course its weird but who wants to go down the road of dragging the case to HR with not a shred of proof beyond one word versus another? Its a waste of time and i guarantee you the OP will come out looking worse, as if this was just a joke or set up between the two. Plus tongues are loose and word will spread, who knows what version would reach other ears.
A big pile of hassle for no reason.

jam_mac_jam · 11-10-2020 09:49AM

I wouldn't see any point in reporting it. It's his word against yours. Even if it is creepy.

Hilarious that people are justifying this, men are weird. Sorry that's some men. It's not normal. It's fairly horrible.

Gruffalux · 11-10-2020 09:51AM

Mostly you would have to feel sorry for him. One, that he has such little self control to not **** during office meetings. Two, that he has such little imagination when it comes to accessing material in spite of having a computer. And three, that he feels the need to tell others about his grubby unseen **** at his office colleagues.. Poor fella.

CivilCybil · 11-10-2020 09:52AM

I'd say it to HR.
They won't be able to prove anything but if they're aware this is a possibility they might do something to prevent his behaviour like sending him a webcam and insisting all webcams are on at all times.

Behaviour like this isn't harmless. If it was discovered I'd imagine the women involved would feel quite violated at the idea that while in a professional meeting someone was **** off to them. It's degrading.

MadDog76 · 11-10-2020 09:56AM

bobbysands81 wrote: »

Having a **** during work to pictures of girls that are talking at that time is not what many would deem normal behaviour.

Who seems what's "normal behaviour" these days?

The stuff you w@nk to may not appeal to me but, as I said, it's a w@nk and not doing any harm to anybody so I'd concentrate on the bigger issues in life and not worry about yours (or anybody else's) masturbation routine.

Gruffalux · 11-10-2020 09:58AM

MadDog76 wrote: »

Who seems what's "normal behaviour" these days?

The stuff you w@nk to may not appeal to me but, as I said, it's a w@nk and not doing any harm to anybody so I'd concentrate on the bigger issues in life and not worry about yours (or anybody else's) masturbation routine.

Ah come off it ta fcuk, **** during a work meeting to the girls talking on screen is not normal.

0ph0rce0 · 11-10-2020 10:01AM

I'm **** now just reading everybody's posts. Ohhhh Keep Going

Pauliedragon · 11-10-2020 10:02AM

Realistically what can HR do?
"There's been an allegation that you were masturbating during work?"
"No I wasn't where's the proof?"
"I heard from someone"
"So rumours are proof now?"
Tell the guy he's done the wrong thing and pull his head in. Both heads.

MadDog76 · 11-10-2020 10:03AM

Gruffalux wrote: »

Ah come off it ta fcuk, **** during a work meeting to the girls talking on screen is not normal.

It's not my normal and, I'd presume, not normal to the vast majority of people but that wasn't really my point ........ my point is that there's no real harm done and, from a practical point of view, there's zero that be done about it without hard evidence so reporting it is futile at best.

Gruffalux · 11-10-2020 10:07AM

MadDog76 wrote: »

It's not my normal and, I'd presume, not normal to the vast majority of people but that wasn't really my point ........ my point is that there's no real harm done and, from a practical point of view, there's zero that be done about without hard evidence so reporting it futile at best.

Well maybe if he had not told anyone. But if this OP is true (which I am not sure) he has told at least one person. It is therefore possible he has told more than one. Things have a habit of leaking out in such cases. So now we have women working who might get wind that some guy was **** about them while they were talking in zoom meetings. Just yuck. It is degrading as someone else rightly said. If he had kept his maturbation 'routine' to himself then no one would be talking about it, including here. He sounds like a bloody eegit to me.

Wanderer2010 · 11-10-2020 10:08AM

Mr.S wrote: »

So we should't ever report things without 100% concrete proof because it's a waste of time? ehhh. What if there have been previous reports made by other people about the same guy doing weird ****? A note to HR saying this was said and leave it to them to do whatever they need to do.

I'd also tell the females who are on the calls tbh. Even if it doesn't directly affect you, it's still people you work with.

If you saw a guy doing it in secret in public, and you are the only one who noticed, would you still say nothing?

The question the op needs to ask himself is: does this affect ME and MY work in any way shape or form? Based on his post the answer is no. So he should stay out of it and do his own work. There are always weird things going on in a workplace. Its naive to think otherwise. Look after number 1.

El_Duderino 09 · 11-10-2020 10:09AM

Piehead wrote: »

A co-worker who is a buddy of mine has admitted to fapping off to the pictures on zoom calls of female attendees when they are talking. Not everyone has their camera on so he can’t been seen as his is off (he claims it’s broken). Nevertheless its seems somewhat deviant behaviour and must be against some work policy. Should I report to HR? May be just my word against him though?

It's your word against theirs that they SAID they did it. You don't have evidence that they said they did it (unless they told you in email or text) and you have absolutely no evidence they they actually DID it. So you're in an even weaker position than you thought.

Maybe they were joking (if they argue they were joking you'd have absolutely no way to refute it).

So I'd say just leave or so and say nothing.

Sam Quentin · 11-10-2020 10:19AM

Fake news fake news .. the op is just like that fake news station CNM

MadDog76 · 11-10-2020 10:21AM

Gruffalux wrote: »

Well maybe if he had not told anyone. But if this OP is true (which I am not sure) he has told at least one person. It is therefore possible he has told more than one. Things have a habit of leaking out in such cases. So now we have women working who might get wind that some guy was **** about them while they were talking in zoom meetings. Just yuck. It is degrading as someone else rightly said. If he had kept his maturbation 'routine' to himself then no one would be talking about it, including here. He sounds like a bloody eegit to me.

He is an eejit and if word gets out and, as a result, he's ostracised by his fellow colleagues then he only has himself to blame for his public embarrassment .......... so, at the end of the day, the only harm being done is to himself potentially.

Kaybaykwah · 11-10-2020 10:21AM

Maybe just take the time to tell the guy directly that this is inappropriate. Leave the management or HR out of it. Just confronting the person and gauging his reaction to see if they are sincerely regretful of doing something offensive to you. This kind of thing can lead to other levela of voyeurism, perhaps.

JohnnyFlash · 11-10-2020 10:24AM

Luke ‘Ming’ Flanagan behaviour.

MadDog76 · 11-10-2020 10:26AM

Mr.S wrote: »

I would argue that this type of stuff happening towards your own colleagues would / should affect you as it's happening in your workplace.

If a lad I worked with was w@nking to a girl I work with (and they probably do using pictures, videos or just their imagination) then that would have zero impact on me/my work ........ if I was told about it I'd probably laugh and shrug it off at most.

Kaybaykwah · 11-10-2020 10:29AM

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Luke ‘Ming’ Flanagan behaviour.

Or Willy Wonka?

corner of hells · 11-10-2020 10:33AM

Was it you ,OP ? Are you trying to guage our opinions.

ChikiChiki · 11-10-2020 10:39AM

Creep behavior alright. I would stay out of it and distance myself from that odious individual. He might get the hint.

Very strange deviant behavior.

Should I report naughty friend

Comments