COVID boredom with life not changing.

nyarlothothep · 29-08-2020 12:54pm

Deleted User wrote: »

If a person is waking up every day experiencing frustration with their lives then they should look at that. Maybe there is something they can change to ease the frustration, if external factors are outside their control then perhaps something within themselves.

We have a choice with how we view and live in the world. I can wind myself in to knots being part of the daily grind or I can adapt my attitude.

So if you were unlucky to be born into a third world country with no hope of changing your circumstances, would it simply just be about adopting a different attitude? If you were born with autism/Aspergers for example and frustrated with your life, it's your responsibility and not that of society to be a little less prejudiced? What if you were a black person in the 1950s in the US or now in fact? How do we have a choice in when it's already been made by institutional frameworks and vested interests? Is frustration perhaps telling you that something isn't right with the world around you and maybe it's a mentally healthy reaction to a profoundly sick society?

29-08-2020 1:21pm

nyarlothothep wrote: »

So if you were unlucky to be born into a third world country with no hope of changing your circumstances, would it simply just be about adopting a different attitude? If you were born with autism/Aspergers for example and frustrated with your life, it's your responsibility and not that of society to be a little less prejudiced? What if you were a black person in the 1950s in the US or now in fact? How do we have a choice in when it's already been made by institutional frameworks and vested interests? Is frustration perhaps telling you that something isn't right with the world around you and maybe it's a mentally healthy reaction to a profoundly sick society?

My post was in response to being frustrated with the daily grind. If we on an individual level feel that we can't change traffic levels, or a packed bus or a queue, then for our own mental health we could look at other things we can do to feel less frustrated

Strumms · 29-08-2020 1:46pm

I wouldn’t be happy for it to be a non ending reality and new way of life, certainly not.

But..

I’m not overly frustrated. Slightly yes. The hardest thing in a way is not knowing how long until normal can be re-achieved. If we had 23rd March 2121 as renormalizing life date ... Too knowing that there are a bunch of selfish tossers who all be it in the minority but from word GO, were just ignoring advice, restrictions and disregarding and thumbing their noses up at all of us. They just trotted out their mental health angles and laughed away as the rest of us tried to engage in thoughtful, safe, selfless and fair behaviors to do our bit as citizens for each other and to get an end in sight.. basically bullies and some people as always are afraid to stand up and say, NO... NOT satisfactory....instead... “ ahh but they are just frustrated “... “ ahhhh but they are just lonely “. “Aghhhhhhhhhh..they were worried about their business “. Bôllocks to these maggots, their sympathizers and enablers...

completedit · 29-08-2020 1:52pm

It was so good at the start but the summer and weather put a dampener on things. Now winter coming it feels like a year has been lost out on. But the paradox is that normal life isn't great either. That go go go mentality is exhausting and a terrible way to live but we are hardwired to do it even if it brings us dread and unhappiness.

H3llR4iser · 29-08-2020 1:55pm

Deleted User wrote: »

My post was in response to being frustrated with the daily grind. If we on an individual level feel that we can't change traffic levels, or a packed bus or a queue, then for our own mental health we could look at other things we can do to feel less frustrated

Pointless. The "daily grind" has objective and measurable adverse effects on life and the environment, creating problems that don't have any reason to exist - pollution and road accidents being some of the most egregious.

Then people try to come up with "solutions" to these completely self-inflicted issues, "solutions" that end up limiting everyone's freedom and enjoyment of life even further and in situations that don't relate with the originator if the problem - the bloody daily grind. These WILL come back to bite you REGARDLESS of your attitude - a "global warming surcharge" on your holiday ticket, a speed camera on a desolate mountain road on your Saturday morning drive, sooth in your lungs after a park run.

This pandemic has proven beyond doubt that the daily grind has pretty much no reason to exist, that there IS another way, that it IS workable and has obvious benefits. Yet most people are reacting like the proverbial moth to the flame, crying about not being able to "party" or even worse, go to the beloved office.

bodhrandude · 29-08-2020 1:59pm

Pandemic prices for the green too, 50 Euro for 2 grams, feck off I might as well take a break until its affordable again.

Strumms · 29-08-2020 2:09pm

completedit wrote: »

It was so good at the start but the summer and weather put a dampener on things. Now winter coming it feels like a year has been lost out on. But the paradox is that normal life isn't great either. That go go go mentality is exhausting and a terrible way to live but we are hardwired to do it even if it brings us dread and unhappiness.

The go go go mentality and daily grinds are things of the past.. anyone in the generations here now that have been impacted by covid and seen the way some employers behaved, before and during... seen and had brought home to them the values of health, family , fairness.. had the time to go and appreciate things that they had previously had to ‘make’ time for like...

even going shopping as a family - “ sorry you go love, boss said he was going to call tonight to give a heads up about Mondays meeting “..... will become “ sorry Martin, I’ve been here all day, you could have called or emailed, I need to spend time with my family now, talk Monday”.

s1ippy · 29-08-2020 2:13pm

Not a hope is the daily grind gone. I was out with work on Thursday and seeing family on Friday and there was mayhem around the place, everyone rushing everywhere as if their lives depend on it. Pathetic behaviour.

I miss gigs and seeing friends randomly around the place. Being able to blow off a bit of steam in a nice group of people without being afraid of getting near them. Letting my guard down a bit.

I don't miss the worries and anxieties I used to have about work, taking it home with me every day, and pondering what's acceptable to other people, like, strangers... Remember them, ha.

1123heavy · 29-08-2020 2:15pm

I'm not saying people should go back to offices etc simply to give others a job, but do people realise there will be wide effects if we don't go back to at least some element of normality?

That guy at the remote train station ticket desk cannot work from home, the chef and his team in your old office canteen can't work from home, the pilots who flew you to Brussels for that Monday morning meeting cannot work from home ... you get the gist.

When those people feel the affects, they end up not able to take out that home mortgage (affects bank workers), they're no longer able to eat out once a week (affecting local business), they are not able to do the home renovation they wanted to (affects painters/decoraters/plumbers/electricians).

It never fails to surprise me how people forget or don't realise just how intertwined our economy is, we rely upon a demand for our business and livelihoods, if we remove the power of people to possess that demand, we shoot ourselves in the foot. I do fully accept all the points mentioned (rat race etc), that should be used as encouragement to rethink how we do things, not stop doing them altogether. We need to adapt.

H3llR4iser · 29-08-2020 2:28pm

1123heavy wrote: »

I do fully accept all the points mentioned (rat race etc), that should be used as encouragement to rethink how we do things, not stop doing them altogether. We need to adapt.

That's the whole point - which is not being taken. Everything will eventually go back to the exact same way it was before, no lessons learned, no advancements made. The writing is already on the wall.

29-08-2020 2:34pm

H3llR4iser wrote: »

Pointless. The "daily grind" has objective and measurable adverse effects on life and the environment, creating problems that don't have any reason to exist - pollution and road accidents being some of the most egregious.

Then people try to come up with "solutions" to these completely self-inflicted issues, "solutions" that end up limiting everyone's freedom and enjoyment of life even further and in situations that don't relate with the originator if the problem - the bloody daily grind. These WILL come back to bite you REGARDLESS of your attitude - a "global warming surcharge" on your holiday ticket, a speed camera on a desolate mountain road on your Saturday morning drive, sooth in your lungs after a park run.

This pandemic has proven beyond doubt that the daily grind has pretty much no reason to exist, that there IS another way, that it IS workable and has obvious benefits. Yet most people are reacting like the proverbial moth to the flame, crying about not being able to "party" or even worse, go to the beloved office.

For some people going in to work is very important to their sense of wellbeing. For some people that is socialising. For others it's a slow pace or freedom from commuting. All of the people with their own uniqueness and way of being in the world.
I'm happy that you have found a way for you

29-08-2020 2:47pm

bodhrandude wrote: »

Pandemic prices for the green too, 50 Euro for 2 grams, feck off I might as well take a break until its affordable again.

Its probably a good time to go off it. Id say there will be a lot less drinking from next week also.

drunkmonkey · 29-08-2020 2:51pm

bodhrandude wrote: »

Pandemic prices for the green too, 50 Euro for 2 grams, feck off I might as well take a break until its affordable again.

The sooner they blow up the athlone mail center the better. It's nearly a right of passage to get a love letter from them these days.

The Mighty Quinn · 29-08-2020 3:05pm

I can't be the only one who finds working during Covid times more stressful? I work for an engineering consultancy doing drawing/modelling work.

I'm sick (with envy?) listening to people talk about getting paid the same with half the workload, or with easier days etc.

I am still expected to be at work from 830-1730 each day, have more phonecalls than ever, same stupid deadlines as ever, have taken a 20% paycut.

I don't get to go home and leave work in the office like I did, the physical separation was good. Instead I'm in a 3 bed semi detached house and am using the box room as an "office" while listening to trucks and vans and what it in and out to the estate all day. Every day its somebody cutting hedges or mowing lawns or having work done to their house, hammers clanging and banging.

There's a baby in the house too, only born in February, who thankfully is fine now but had months of bad reflux and non stop crying to contend with.

So I'm under immense stress all the time. Happiness levels have tanked, I am gaining weight, going crazy being at home all the time, losing all drive.

I have become fearful of the real world it seems. I was in town yesterday to get a few essentials and I was so anxious I couldn't believe it. I'm not afraid of the virus or anything, just been so cooped up for so long that interacting with people and being in small crowded areas now leaves me a bit overwhelmed.

I think I'll have PTSD after all this.

stateofflux · 29-08-2020 3:10pm

H3llR4iser wrote: »

Pointless. The "daily grind" has objective and measurable adverse effects on life and the environment, creating problems that don't have any reason to exist - pollution and road accidents being some of the most egregious.

Then people try to come up with "solutions" to these completely self-inflicted issues, "solutions" that end up limiting everyone's freedom and enjoyment of life even further and in situations that don't relate with the originator if the problem - the bloody daily grind. These WILL come back to bite you REGARDLESS of your attitude - a "global warming surcharge" on your holiday ticket, a speed camera on a desolate mountain road on your Saturday morning drive, sooth in your lungs after a park run.

This pandemic has proven beyond doubt that the daily grind has pretty much no reason to exist, that there IS another way, that it IS workable and has obvious benefits. Yet most people are reacting like the proverbial moth to the flame, crying about not being able to "party" or even worse, go to the beloved office.

No matter what way you look at it there has been a curtailment of freedoms and choice. Thats why some people are irked. I do agree there is and should be another way of modern living but thats a seperate issue to current Pandemic restrictions.

As for the office, if you have a house or apartment with seperate room then grand...otherwise its not really a healthy option. Also we have not even hit the gloom of Winter yet.

hmmm · 29-08-2020 3:19pm

Taking up an outdoor-based hobby you can get stuck into, particularly one you can carry into the Winter, would be my suggestion. Hiking is a good one, go exploring your local parks, woodlands etc. Cycling the same, on or off-road. Kayaking. Golf. Pitch & putt. Tennis. Sea swimming. I know they might not be what you want to do right now, but it'll get you through to a vaccine next year which will start us to move back towards normality. It'll be something to look forward to at the weekend, it's ideally something you can do with friends, and there's usually a learning phase for all these hobbies which will keep you occupied.

fits · 29-08-2020 3:21pm

The Mighty Quinn wrote: »

I can't be the only one who finds working during Covid times more stressful? I work for an engineering consultancy doing drawing/modelling work.

I'm sick (with envy?) listening to people talk about getting paid the same with half the workload, or with easier days etc.

I am still expected to be at work from 830-1730 each day, have more phonecalls than ever, same stupid deadlines as ever, have taken a 20% paycut.

I don't get to go home and leave work in the office like I did, the physical separation was good. Instead I'm in a 3 bed semi detached house and am using the box room as an "office" while listening to trucks and vans and what it in and out to the estate all day. Every day its somebody cutting hedges or mowing lawns or having work done to their house, hammers clanging and banging.

There's a baby in the house too, only born in February, who thankfully is fine now but had months of bad reflux and non stop crying to contend with.

So I'm under immense stress all the time. Happiness levels have tanked, I am gaining weight, going crazy being at home all the time, losing all drive.

I have become fearful of the real world it seems. I was in town yesterday to get a few essentials and I was so anxious I couldn't believe it. I'm not afraid of the virus or anything, just been so cooped up for so long that interacting with people and being in small crowded areas now leaves me a bit overwhelmed.

I think I'll have PTSD after all this.

That’s tough going alright. I think long periods cooped up at home are really hard to deal with mentally. Can you schedule in some sort of social outlet once a week? Also reflux really sucks. Been there.

1123heavy · 29-08-2020 3:22pm

The Mighty Quinn wrote: »

I can't be the only one who finds working during Covid times more stressful? I work for an engineering consultancy doing drawing/modelling work.

I'm sick (with envy?) listening to people talk about getting paid the same with half the workload, or with easier days etc.

I am still expected to be at work from 830-1730 each day, have more phonecalls than ever, same stupid deadlines as ever, have taken a 20% paycut.

I don't get to go home and leave work in the office like I did, the physical separation was good. Instead I'm in a 3 bed semi detached house and am using the box room as an "office" while listening to trucks and vans and what it in and out to the estate all day. Every day its somebody cutting hedges or mowing lawns or having work done to their house, hammers clanging and banging.

There's a baby in the house too, only born in February, who thankfully is fine now but had months of bad reflux and non stop crying to contend with.

So I'm under immense stress all the time. Happiness levels have tanked, I am gaining weight, going crazy being at home all the time, losing all drive.

I have become fearful of the real world it seems. I was in town yesterday to get a few essentials and I was so anxious I couldn't believe it. I'm not afraid of the virus or anything, just been so cooped up for so long that interacting with people and being in small crowded areas now leaves me a bit overwhelmed.

I think I'll have PTSD after all this.

I suggest you make it a daily habit to go for a walk to the local park or go and sit somewhere for a cup of coffee, alternate it. Do something to bring you out of the house each day and readjust. I know it's a whole lot easier said than done, but diet is a huge thing and affects the mind too. How about trying a new (healthy) recipe every other day? It will give your mind something to do and a bit of enjoyment as well as proving good to the waistline.

My biggest step to losing weight was not buying junk in the first place. Buy lean cuts and veg. Ya can't nurse a cookie craving if there are no cookies in the house! In fact you'll forget about them and other junk altogether.

Bottom line is you need to take action, do not continue on your current trajectory.

SB71 · 29-08-2020 3:26pm

Initially i didnt mind but it can get incredibly boring sometimes, i suppose on the plus side i took up jogging again after years not doing it but asides from that i miss the social aspect of pubs and clubs,and tthe freedom to travel anywhere tou like.

Gerry Hatrick · 29-08-2020 3:30pm

I'll be honest iv'e enjoyed it. Time for myself and the family, rebuilt a motorbike, did endless amounts of DIY stuff around the house at my own pace. I don't drink alcohol so not fussed in the slightest with pubs being shut and the social side of things i couldn't give a sh1t about that as im very comfortable in my own skin.

hatrickpatrick · 29-08-2020 3:39pm

I live for nightlife and crowds generally, and as I've said in other threads honestly it's not the prolonged lack of being able to socialise in a crowd that's f*cking with me, but the rather alarming language of "the new normal" suggesting that meeting strangers, dancing, dating, concerts, parties etc are literally things I might end up spending most of my thirties devoid of. I could hack it if there was an end game, but it's the idea that young, single extroverts could just have no social outlet whatsoever for years and years which is so soul destroying. As I've said in other threads, it's not even places being closed, it's the 2m social distance. Some of us feel most happy and comfortable in a crowd, and the lack of that since nightclubs closed in March, and having to gather in bizarrely spaced out groups even among people you know, is psychologically devastating when combined with the prospect that this is a new, quasi-permanent way of life as opposed to a temporary setback.

MrMusician18 · 29-08-2020 3:43pm

If I never set for in the office again I won't shed a tear. I live relatively close to the office but even still the daily commute took an hour in and an hour+ home, over a 40 year career that's two and a half years doing something I absolutely detest. WfH, I have my commute down to less than a minute, it's fantastic. I won't say I'm any more or less productive in the office, roughly the same. There is no need for me to go back and I will strongly resist the return when it comes.
Not commuting has also been the same as increasing my pre tax wage by about a grand, double good!

So I have more free time and more money in my pocket. I don't miss my colleagues, because, well they're just colleagues and I have a life outside work.

29-08-2020 4:42pm

It's sad that so many people felt they had to live a life based on what others think is acceptable. That they felt they couldn't say no to a night out or felt they were the only people in the world not having weekend plans.

fits · 29-08-2020 5:12pm

1123heavy wrote: »

I suggest you make it a daily habit to go for a walk to the local park or go and sit somewhere for a cup of coffee, alternate it. Do something to bring you out of the house each day and readjust. I know it's a whole lot easier said than done, but diet is a huge thing and affects the mind too. How about trying a new (healthy) recipe every other day? It will give your mind something to do and a bit of enjoyment as well as proving good to the waistline.

My biggest step to losing weight was not buying junk in the first place. Buy lean cuts and veg. Ya can't nurse a cookie craving if there are no cookies in the house! In fact you'll forget about them and other junk altogether.

Bottom line is you need to take action, do not continue on your current trajectory.

I go for a 3 mile walk most mornings after dropping my children to minder. It means I don’t start work until 9:30 but worth it for my wellbeing. I’ve lost a stone with the extra time to prepare meals and exercise. Much healthier.

jrosen · 29-08-2020 6:21pm

Initially the slower pace was a nice change. But at this stage im BORED. Its work home rinse repeat.

completedit · 29-08-2020 6:27pm

Yeah exactly, there's no real ebb and flow to the week at all. There's things I don't miss. Hate midday busyness and the general sort of frantic rush at lunchtime but miss the bustle of a Thursday or Friday evening after the week is done. I feel we sort of went into some sort of time vacuum whereby it could be 2020 or 2015, 2019 seems like an eternity ago and has an almost historical feel to it like thinking back to a different era. This week, I'm making it my business to get back into sports. The humdrum of gym, home, gym, home is so monotonous.

Don't know how we could rejig life to be better; one definite improvement would be increased working from home but not exclusively. The reality is commercial life can help bring life to a city and as we can see right now with Dublin, it's a pretty sad site(save for a few locations)

Sandz066 · 29-08-2020 7:33pm

Sick of the monotony of it all.
Everything so preplanned no talking to new people.
Also feeling very single, gave the dating apps a go but place is a minefield and even if I did get talking to a fella I liked planning a date would be so regimental.
God I miss music and comedy gigs and going new places and chatting to random people?

DeanAustin · 29-08-2020 8:15pm

I miss a bunch of stuff. I’m not big on going out but I do miss the odd night out or few pints. I miss looking forward to going somewhere abroad and having the choice to travel. I miss going to football games. I miss seeing the people I work with occasionally.

I don’t miss the commute. Drove it a few weeks ago with no traffic and begrudged losing the 25 mins there and back. I enjoy working from home (even though I’m currently stuck in the house with my ex wife). I’ve played more golf this year than ever before. I read more. I’m exercising more and have lost a stone. So lots of good stuff and a lifestyle I’ve kind of wanted to live over the last few years since I had kids and hit my late 30s.

Lots of good stuff but the removal of choice around travel, going to the office once or twice a week and socialising are the major downsides.

Van.Bosch · 29-08-2020 8:16pm

DeanAustin wrote: »

I miss a bunch of stuff. I’m not big on going out but I do miss the odd night out or few pints. I miss looking forward to going somewhere abroad and having the choice to travel. I miss going to football games. I miss seeing the people I work with occasionally.

I don’t miss the commute. Drove it a few weeks ago with no traffic and begrudged losing the 25 mins there and back. I enjoy working from home (even though I’m currently stuck in the house with my ex wife). I’ve played more golf this year than ever before. I read more. I’m exercising more and have lost a stone. So lots of good stuff and a lifestyle I’ve kind of wanted to live over the last few years since I had kids and hit my late 30s.

Lots of good stuff but the removal of choice around travel, going to the office once or twice a week and socialising are the major downsides.

Good man - you seem to be making the best of a bad situation. I miss the same things as you.

ChopShop · 29-08-2020 8:36pm

H3llR4iser wrote: »

I'd be the opposite, to be honest - I kinda dread the possibility of returning to the frankly insane way we were all living before. Rush everywhere and all the time, rat race in the morning, run to make the train on time, crowds everywhere, queue for a cr@ppy sandwich at lunch, endless meetings just so a few people can strike their egos, rush for a crowded train again, people pushing, people who hadn't seen a shower in days (even if they're "associate director" somewhere), waste a minimum of two hours a day to come and go to a job that has no on site presence whatsoever. Pointless social events, again crowds everywhere - queue for the bar, queue for the toilette, "oh you're not coming? why?" justifications. Nah, thank you.

Now I get up one hour later - check the emails. All going well, take a shower and make some coffee. Sit the morning meeting(s) depending on the day, and they last the allotted time - people don't like to argue about pointless minutiae over webcam. Prepare some lunch, or go out for some exercise (I've taken back to leisure cycling for the first time since childhood) depending on day/weather. Back to work, get stuff out of the way with the advantage of having nobody chatting, gossiping, eating takeout, preparing disgusting yogurt shakes that smell like old sweaty clothes, farting and whatever you can imagine all around me.

Finish work and 30 seconds later I can do whatever I want - I've rekindled a lot of my hobbies that had been laying dormant because, frankly, when I finally got home all I wanted to do was eat crap and crash out. I'm going through my long standing queue of model kits builds, advancing some personal coding projects, exercising more regularly (mostly on my own but even the gym is more tolerable with the limited number of people and booking systems - it's not anymore a fetid, humid, disgusting inferno filled to the brim with 'roidheads, posers and instagram divas) and even keeping the apartment in absolutely spotless condition - mopping the floor or cleaning the bathtub isn't as aggravating when you didn't waste a significant portion of your day travelling on a train you'd rather not board to a place you needn't be.

There are VITAL lessons for society to learn from this, but all the signs point to most of us not getting the message AT ALL.

Before we know, we'll all be back rat racing, commuting, rushing everywhere. People sneezing and coughing, dragging themselves to work when they should call out sick and be in bed. Complaining about the traffic, the crowded bus, that girl in the office who's headphone is so loud you can hear her music, that guy who cycles 30km to work at Tour-De-France pace and refuses to take a shower.

And don't get me started about when the blabbering about global warming, road deaths and whatnot, and "what solutions could possibly be put in place?" will inevitably restart. Although it might turn funny, really - IF mankind ever makes it to a more illuminated state of mind, the future historians will look at the post-2020 pandemic phase and wonder if the virus might not have had some undetected side effects, causing people to lose short-term memory.

I'm starting to think you're one of my colleagues...

COVID boredom with life not changing.

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