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So are you single? Argos style....

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Comments

  • #182
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,240 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    noodler wrote: »
    I think you've missed the point here.

    Not only could she have phoned or emailed her complaint, and still kept her number private, but she could have avoided the whole world being able to see her complaint.

    Not if she wanted a reply though, kind of have to give them your number in that case.....


  • #183
    SwordofLight
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 350 ✭✭SwordofLight


    Don't agree with the sentiment there is an intent to sue, that's ridiculous.

    The guy completely abused her information and right to privacy.

    Pretty insensitive to suggest she should just get over it. Pretty intimidating and takes a lot of guts to say something especially given he knows her address and number.

    The real question is - what if it was a girl as the delivery driver ---- would it be any less of a drama? haha I won't be offering an opinion on that one!


  • #184
    o1s1n
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 36,378 ✭✭✭✭o1s1n
    Master of the Universe


    Tell me how wrote: »
    Given your post, can you comment on the below. I am genuinely curious.

    There are definitely limits to it.

    Two office workers trading glances and smiles at a cooler is very different to collecting pretty girls phone numbers as a delivery man and using them later.


  • #185
    Stateofyou
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,431 ✭✭✭Stateofyou


    Not sure if this has been said the last 13 pages, but something I have learned is not to belittle women's experiences like was done in the OP and I'm sure up and down this thread. If you're male, you have no clue the insane levels of precautions women take in their every day lives to be and stay safe. As a husband and also father to a daughter it's now something I'm aware of and think about from time to time.

    Sometimes when women reject a man, he gets his ego hurt and things turn ugly very quickly. Women know this, and in our society are conditioned to try and appear as nice and accommodating as possible so as to not end up stalked, hurt or worse.

    How about instead of telling women their ridiculous for speaking up or threatening to sue or whatever you imagine, and focusing on women's reactions - focus on calling out men and their bad behaviour and holding them accountable instead.


  • #186
    BorneTobyWilde
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37,572 ✭✭✭✭BorneTobyWilde


    Had he asked in person it would have been a non issue. Texting was crossing a professional line as he used the number on file to help his delivery for a personal reason.


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  • #187
    noodler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 27,384 ✭✭✭✭noodler


    hynesie08 wrote: »
    Not if she wanted a reply though, kind of have to give them your number in that case.....

    Eh..are you taking the piss?

    She'd rather the whole world see her making the complaint on Facebook then give the company her contact details?

    1. The company have her number. Hence the thread.

    2. Can Argos act without any further info other than a partially censored screengrab?

    How do you expect she will get any official "satisfaction" out of this without contact info?

    Do you expect Argos to issue an official apology through her FB DMs? How does she intend to sue?

    It seems fairly clear she wanted this public despite.you bending over backwards to try and explain it.


  • #188
    Clare Kat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 67 ✭✭Clare Kat


    noodler wrote: »
    The takeaway man knows where you live.

    The postman.

    The couriers.


    I think people are making an enormous leap from an inappropriate text to stalking/home invasion or whatever they have in mind when they bring up the address.

    Fair point... and I’m a woman.


  • #189
    MsStote
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 149 ✭✭MsStote


    BorneTobyWilde wrote: »
    Had he asked in person it would have been a non issue. Texting was crossing a professional line as he used the number on file to help his delivery for a personal reason.

    No this is actually worse. You do not pressure me with a question like that on my doorstep. This is my safe place. Ask me outside my home somewhere, okay but I would be afraid of saying the wrong thing. I do not think that some people get that some (NOT ALL) people can get very angry when rejected.


  • #190
    Tell me how
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,026 ✭✭✭✭Tell me how


    BorneTobyWilde wrote: »
    Had he asked in person it would have been a non issue. Texting was crossing a professional line as he used the number on file to help his delivery for a personal reason.

    How? In person in the moment? Or, in person after calling back later?

    I think the former would have also be viewed as being unprofessional and crossing a line, I think the latter would have been viewed as being even creepier than what did happen.


  • #191
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,240 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    noodler wrote: »
    Eh..are you taking the piss?

    She'd rather the whole world see her making the complaint on Facebook then give the company her contact details?

    1. The company have her number. Hence the thread.

    2. Can Argos act without any further info other than a partially censored screengrab?

    How do you expect she will get any official "satisfaction" out of this without contact info?

    Do you expect Argos to issue an official apology through her FB DMs? How does she intend to sue?

    It seems fairly clear she wanted this public despite.you bending over backwards to try and explain it.

    1:She says that she doesn't want to give her phone number unless it's to a manager because she doesn't trust them with it. Not an unfair stance to be fair

    2:Do we know there wasn't follow up conversations through DM or messenger?

    I don't expect argos to do anything, but maybe she got an email or direct contact from them to follow up? Also there's the imaginary lawsuit again.

    I never said she didn't want it public, I said I understood why she didn't want them to have her number since they can't be trusted with it. Or maybe she's trying to warn other women??


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  • #192
    SineadSpears
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,032 ✭✭✭SineadSpears


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Imagine if he was a stalker with sinister intent and she'd just shrugged it off and didn't report him?
    Imagine if he was a genuine guy who just liked her, & was working his way towards asking her out.
    Stateofyou wrote: »
    Not sure if this has been said the last 13 pages, but something I have learned is not to belittle women's experiences like was done in the OP and I'm sure up and down this thread. If you're male, you have no clue the insane levels of precautions women take in their every day lives to be and stay safe. As a husband and also father to a daughter it's now something I'm aware of and think about from time to time.

    Sometimes when women reject a man, he gets his ego hurt and things turn ugly very quickly. Women know this, and in our society are conditioned to try and appear as nice and accommodating as possible so as to not end up stalked, hurt or worse.

    How about instead of telling women their ridiculous for speaking up or threatening to sue or whatever you imagine, and focusing on women's reactions - focus on calling out men and their bad behaviour and holding them accountable instead.

    I understand this, but we can't tarnish all men(in all situations) with that same brush.

    The GDPR thing is a separate issue, but him being called 'creepy' for wanting to ask a woman out, is wrong imo. I feel so sorry for the man in this situation .


    Similar thing actually happened to me before. Maintenance guy messaged me asking was I going out with anyone. I didn't for a second think it was creepy. I wasnt interested at all, & just told him I was in fact seeing somebody. We both laughed it off, & that was that

    Edit: just want to add, in my situation above, I did feel a tad bit uncomfortable simply because of the fact that I wasnt interested. Not, to the point if me thinking the man in question was creepy though

    There's something comforting about being around someone who understands your need for silence & space. You don't have to fill the air with words or explanations, they just get it..



  • #193
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    No winners here except social media. The guy made a mistake and the girl doubled down.

    Clicks ahoy.


  • #194
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I sometimes think I inhabit a completely different world to some other people. My world has no fear of men or a constant need to protect myself. I go about my business free from harm and threat. Sure I've encouraged the odd over eager lad on a night out. When it comes to paying for a service I've been asked out by taxi drivers and actually briefly dated one years ago because he took a chance.

    That's me and my life. I understand others take a different view. Its not fair to pick on this woman for how she feels. Obviously his approach upset her.

    Personally though I think we have become more and more afraid of human connection.
    Be it the person showing romantic interest or the stranger striking up a conversation at the bus stop. Its sad.


  • #195
    Sam Quentin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,237 ✭✭✭Sam Quentin


    I think she should have got him in the sack...but not get him the sack. Yaaaaaa-Love-It lol.
    All joking aside, I hope the guy doesn't suffer from this in his work life and I hope the girl calms down a bit and take it for what it was...the guy fancied her and the feeling wasn't mutual. That's it. God bless both of them Amen.


  • #196
    o1s1n
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 36,378 ✭✭✭✭o1s1n
    Master of the Universe


    [Deleted User] wrote: »
    I sometimes think I inhabit a completely different world to some other people. My world has no fear of men or a constant need to protect myself. I go about my business free from harm and threat. Sure I've encouraged the odd over eager lad on a night out. When it comes to paying for a service I've been asked out by taxi drivers and actually briefly dated one years ago because he took a chance.

    That's me and my life. I understand others take a different view. Its not fair to pick on this woman for how she feels. Obviously his approach upset her.

    Personally though I think we have become more and more afraid of human connection.
    Be it the person showing romantic interest or the stranger striking up a conversation at the bus stop. Its sad.

    Maybe she gets this kind of thing all the time?

    I've a good friend who constantly gets cat called and harassed by dudes in day to day life on the street. In the middle of the day. Have literally been there on multiple occasions when it's happened. Definitely an eye opener.

    The situation really does vary from person to person, some girls and women are more of a target than others.


  • #197
    Church on Tuesday
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,858 ✭✭✭Church on Tuesday


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I sometimes think I inhabit a completely different world to some other people. My world has no fear of men or a constant need to protect myself. I go about my business free from harm and threat. Sure I've encouraged the odd over eager lad on a night out. When it comes to paying for a service I've been asked out by taxi drivers and actually briefly dated one years ago because he took a chance.

    That's me and my life. I understand others take a different view. Its not fair to pick on this woman for how she feels. Obviously his approach upset her.

    Personally though I think we have become more and more afraid of human connection.
    Be it the person showing romantic interest or the stranger striking up a conversation at the bus stop. Its sad.


    Nail on head. It's breathtakingly sad, some of the responses and virtue signaling on here make me despair for the future of humanity. It's like we have to be automatons now; no spontaneity or excitement, or chancing your arm with that person you fancy everybody is/could be a threat, it's sad.


  • #198
    SineadSpears
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,032 ✭✭✭SineadSpears


    Sam Quentin wrote: »
    I think she should have got him in the sack...but not get him the sack. Yaaaaaa-Love-It lol.
    All joking aside, I hope the guy doesn't suffer from this in his work life and I hope the girl calms down a bit and take it for what it was...the guy fancied her and the feeling wasn't mutual. That's it. God bless both of them Amen.

    Unfortunately for him, I imagine he will suffer in his work life because of the GDPR issue.

    And also his personal life, after a lot of people are now branding him a creep

    There's something comforting about being around someone who understands your need for silence & space. You don't have to fill the air with words or explanations, they just get it..



  • #199
    Sam Quentin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,237 ✭✭✭Sam Quentin


    SineadSpears wrote: »
    Unfortunately for him, I imagine he will suffer in his work life because of the GDPR issue.

    And also his personal life, after a lot of people are now branding him a creep
    Unfortunately I think you are right..
    That's life I suppose, wasn't like that when I was a 'younger' man. No wonder there is so many suicides among young men,.not a bit of wonder...
    Sad so f#@+&n sad.


  • #200
    Girl from Whitesnake Video
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20 ✭Girl from Whitesnake Video


    Have only read the op so far, will go back. From that I think she over-reacted however you don't know the body language that he conveyed, the actual interaction they did have when he made the delivery originally so you can't really make a judgement against her on it. Plus she is well within her rights to make a complaint and it is understandable.

    Personally if I felt it was harmless chat up and just a genuine guy chancing his arm, I'd have left it at that but we don't know all of their interactions.


  • #201
    SineadSpears
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,032 ✭✭✭SineadSpears


    Something is wrong and I can't quote Diamonds post.
    Anyway, just on one point, 'its not fair to pick on this woman for how she feels'.

    I fully accept that she didn't like his approach. However, I am not a fan of how she herself handled the situation. Shaming him on social media.
    I only hope his name wasn't mentioned online by her, or anyone else

    There's something comforting about being around someone who understands your need for silence & space. You don't have to fill the air with words or explanations, they just get it..



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  • #202
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,240 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    SineadSpears wrote: »
    Something is wrong and I can't quote Diamonds post.
    Anyway, just on one point, 'its not fair to pick on this woman for how she feels'.

    I fully accept that she didn't like his approach. However, I am not a fan of how she herself handled the situation. Shaming him on social media.
    I only hope his name wasn't mentioned online by her, or anyone else

    From what I can gather, she never "shamed" him, there was a problem with her order and she mentioned him messaging her in the comment. The screenshot came out in the replies because people jumped on her calling her names (unbelievable I know, would never happen here).

    The daily mail selectively cropped the comments and didn't ask her for a statement.

    That's her side of it anyway, and I have no issues believing the part about the daily mail anyway......


  • #203
    Leg End Reject
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 20,608 Mod ✭✭✭✭Leg End Reject


    Church on Tuesday wrote: »
    Nail on head. It's breathtakingly sad, some of the responses and virtue signaling on here make me despair for the future of humanity. It's like we have to be automatons now; no spontaneity or excitement, or chancing your arm with that person you fancy everybody is/could be a threat, it's sad.

    Yeah, there was a time this would be seen as a compliment. If you weren't interested you said no and moved on with your life, but it was a nice ego boost and something to brag about with your friends.

    I'd hate to be a man trying to second guess when it's acceptable to make a move. I think there's going to be a lot of lonely people in the future.

    People have been interacting and signalling interest since the dawn of mankind, yet we seem to be going out of our way to complicate it.

    Yes, he got her number through work documents, but the vast majority of people are decent. Meeting someone off a dating app is probably riskier for both genders than a delivery driver contacting a customer he delivered to. For a start she'd be able to give the company name to friends/family if she met him, had anything happened the guards would easily trace the driver who delivered to her.

    It's highly unlikely he meant harm.
    https://forumofgames.com/index.php




  • #204
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,240 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    Leg End Reject wrote: »
    Yeah, there was a time this would be seen as a compliment. If you weren't interested you said no and moved on with your life, but it was a nice ego boost and something to brag about with your friends.

    I'd hate to be a man trying to second guess when it's acceptable to make a move. I think there's going to be a lot of lonely people in the future.

    People have been interacting and signalling interest since the dawn of mankind, yet we seem to be going out of our way to complicate it.

    If this was the 60s and a guy you don't know got your number through deception and rang your house to ask if you had a boyfriend, it'd still be weird.

    Pure bollocks, he crossed a line, this wasn't some lad leaning in for the kiss in a nightclub, it's a creep being creepy.

    It's not more complicated these days, just don't be a creep


  • #205
    Leg End Reject
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 20,608 Mod ✭✭✭✭Leg End Reject


    hynesie08 wrote: »
    If this was the 60s and a guy you don't know got your number through deception and rang your house to ask if you had a boyfriend, it'd still be weird.

    Pure bollocks, he crossed a line, this wasn't some lad leaning in for the kiss in a nightclub, it's a creep being creepy.

    It's not more complicated these days, just don't be a creep
    Do you know for a fact that he is a creep? You might not like how he obtained her number, but that doesn't make him Larry Murphy material.
    https://forumofgames.com/index.php




  • #206
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    We are watching romance die before our eyes..


  • #207
    Leg End Reject
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 20,608 Mod ✭✭✭✭Leg End Reject


    [Deleted User] wrote: »
    We are watching romance die before our eyes..
    And trust, which is worse.
    https://forumofgames.com/index.php




  • #208
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,240 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    Leg End Reject wrote: »
    Do you know for a fact that he is a creep? You might not like how he obtained her number, but that doesn't make him Larry Murphy material.

    Texting someone without telling them who you are (there were 2 lads in the van) asking if they have a boyfriend and then pushing it when they don't answer? That's creepy, maybe not rapey, but creepy....


  • #209
    Sardonicat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,444 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    Deleted User wrote: »
    We are watching romance die before our eyes..


    We'll have to start buying our furniture in furniture outlets again. It was a wardrobe that my OH built that got us together. It took several home improvment jobs over several months before he asked me out, though.


  • #210
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    We'll have to start buying our furniture in furniture outlets again. It was a wardrobe that my OH built that got us together. It took several home improvment jobs over several months before he asked me out, though.

    I actually need a wardrobe at the minute..I'd feel weird getting some chick I fancied to build me one though..


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  • #211
    SineadSpears
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,032 ✭✭✭SineadSpears


    hynesie08 wrote: »
    If this was the 60s and a guy you don't know got your number through deception and rang your house to ask if you had a boyfriend, it'd still be weird.

    Pure bollocks, he crossed a line, this wasn't some lad leaning in for the kiss in a nightclub, it's a creep being creepy.

    It's not more complicated these days, just don't be a creep

    I feel like a stranger in a nightclub leaning in for a kiss, is crossing the line more than a guy asking a woman he likes, if she is dating anyone.

    There's something comforting about being around someone who understands your need for silence & space. You don't have to fill the air with words or explanations, they just get it..



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