Do you have a best friend?

Comhrá · 04-01-2020 06:36PM #1

Do many middle-aged men have no close friends other than wives/partners?

I'm a late middle aged male, in a long-term stable relationship but I have a male best friend (also partnered with grown-up family) for as long as my relationship with whom I'm probably closer to in many ways than I am to my partner.

Like many people I have a good circle of friends of varying degree but only four or five people I consider 'close.'

Two male married friends of mine have told me they have no real close friends or buddies to go for a pint or a match with, and one even asked me a few years ago if I'd be his 'buddy' for knocking around with. We did this for a while but it petered out probably due to men not bothering to stay in touch or making the effort.

Bobblehats · 04-01-2020 06:45PM

..anybody?

US2 · 04-01-2020 06:45PM

I do. Best friend by default really hes my only friend haha

faceman · 04-01-2020 06:46PM

Yes but its complicated.

Bobblehats · 04-01-2020 06:47PM

US2 wrote: »

I do. Best friend by default really hes my only friend haha

The most dysfunctional friend. Ditto!

Purgative · 04-01-2020 06:47PM

Do you mean best Facebook friend?

pgj2015 · 04-01-2020 06:48PM

mine died. i have a good few friends,some closer than others but doubt i will ever have a best friend again.

Day Lewin · 04-01-2020 06:49PM

My spouse: long-term really, truly, best of friends.

Not so many very close friends of my own gender. But enough that I could call on a pal if needed, etc.

tritriagain · 04-01-2020 06:50PM

Charlie. My cocker spaniel. Mind you he's a lightweight when it comes to the pints.

Neames · 04-01-2020 06:58PM

I'm lucky I have a few very good friends. Some live close by and our kids are friends with each other. So we meet a lot. Some of my other friends live some distance away. This thread has prompted me to make more of an effort to stay in touch with them.

corner of hells · 04-01-2020 07:00PM

I did have two "best" friends.
I didn't know they even knew each till they both emigrated to America years ago together , suddenly to the surprise of their families and one of their wives.

Plumbthedepths · 04-01-2020 07:01PM

I've known my best friend for 30 years, both of us have families and wives .

Signore Fancy Pants · 04-01-2020 07:02PM

Yes, Mrs_Fegelian is my best friend...with sexy results.

04-01-2020 07:03PM

Yup. A few. Childhood/teenage/adult pal who I'm travelling abroad with next week to w.atch a match. Groomsman for another pal that I rarely see soon. My brother because... Kinda happy enough with that

Johnny Sausage · 04-01-2020 07:03PM

I have 16 and I keep them in order on my Bebo page

TheValeyard · 04-01-2020 07:04PM

Yep. Still friends since baby infants in primary school.

Signore Fancy Pants · 04-01-2020 07:09PM

TheValeyard wrote: »

Yep. Still friends since baby infants in primary school.

Yeah but that was 5 weeks ago. You were told to stay 100 meters from every school!

TheValeyard · 04-01-2020 07:13PM

Signore Fancy Pants wrote: »

Yeah but that was 5 weeks ago. You were told to stay 100 meters from every school!

*sigh*

Every week I have to explain this to you....

You have to stay 100 metres away when I'm at school!

Also, Joe agrees with me

_Brian · 04-01-2020 07:14PM

Other than herself...

One brother and myself are very close. The

pgj2015 · 04-01-2020 07:20PM

champchamp wrote: »

I have no friends.
Married years.
I get down at times, no one to go to the pub with etc...

how come you ended up with no friends? was it your wife who cut you off from them?

Signore Fancy Pants · 04-01-2020 07:22PM

TheValeyard wrote: »

*sigh*

Every week I have to explain this to you....

You have to stay 100 metres away when I'm at school!

Also, Joe agrees with me

Oooooohh. Tell Joe I said hi.

jaxxx · 04-01-2020 07:23PM

My left hand.

Johnny Sausage wrote: »

I have 16 and I keep them in order on my Bebo page

Bebo still exists?? ?? ??

TheValeyard · 04-01-2020 07:23PM

Signore Fancy Pants wrote: »

Oooooohh. Tell Joe I said hi.

Joe Mama says hi

El_Duderino 09 · 04-01-2020 07:25PM

Yeah I've a few really close friends. Lads who I really like spending time with and it doesn't really matter what we do together. Go for a pint, go watch the local rugby or football team, cricket during the summer. People who you have the craic with and learn from and will listen if you have something you wan to chat about.

04-01-2020 07:26PM

My cousin and I were born within a couple of weeks of each other, have been best friends all our lives. I've another friend who can tell what going on with me in the space between answering the phone and saying hello.

There's also my nicer half, who knows everything about me and I'm fairly sure can read my mind.

Arghus · 04-01-2020 07:29PM

Ah, yeah. I've a few that I have known for years. There's a few other ones that I met later on in life but clicked with immediately too.

wexandproud · 04-01-2020 07:33PM

Don't have a ''best'' friend as i don't see a need to rank them in order . I have some very good friendships which have lasted since my teenage years .

lozenges · 04-01-2020 07:36PM

Wouldn't say I have any best friends as such. There are a couple of people who I have known for over a decade who I would consider myself very close to though.

Lily_Aldrin7 · 04-01-2020 07:43PM

My partner and I are both 30, I have a best friend (she’s been my best friend since we were 4) and a few good friends to hang out with. My partner (male) has only one friend (my friend’s husband) and they are not that close, mushy playing fifa sometimes or going for a drink but not very often either. He’s the smarter one in our relationship and definitely the more likeable one but he’s very content on his own and prefers to have time for himself. We have two kids so not much time for himself and he says he doesn’t have the time to have more friends

Tipperary animal lover · 04-01-2020 07:51PM

I had one close true friend since first class, stayed by my side thick and thin, had some mad wild times when we were younger could always depend on him, when i came out as "a gay" back in the early 90s, had a rough few years from family and a small town minds he was by my side no questions asked, was my bestman when i married my long term partner two years ago, didnt the fecker go and kill himself last year, i knew there was a lot of problems, we tried everything and i can say mental health services in this country is a pure joke, oh i wish i had a few more close friends but everyone seems to busy in their own lives at least i have a partner whos always there thick and thin.

valoren · 04-01-2020 08:18PM

Not anymore. He died in his sleep a few months ago. It was dilated cardiomyopathy. He was only 42. We were best friends since meeting at work in 2006. If I was ever in an "arrested-turkish-prison-one-phone-call" scenario, he was the one I'd have called. Truly the mark of a best friend.

Do you have a best friend?

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