Would you take you wife back if she cheated?

henryporter · 13-12-2019 05:19PM

Kopparberg Strawberry and Lime wrote: »

Wut ?

its all in the username

IAMAMORON · 13-12-2019 05:22PM

Kopparberg Strawberry and Lime wrote: »

Wut ?

I think it makes sense?

The op said his brother has let things go weight wise, it happens, but on the basis that his marriage is probably over, he will need to trim down if he wants a new partner.

Women have standards the last time I looked....?

John_Rambo · 13-12-2019 05:27PM

D3V!L wrote: »

Tell him to grow a pair and kick her out. If she says she still lives there tell her she doesn't because all of her stuff is burning in the back yard. She'll get the hint.

Clueless post.

If they break up, she'll remain in the house with the kids. Your brother will end up back in your folks or renting. After there's a divorce the house will be hers and your brother will be paying for some of it and maintenance.

Sorry, but this is the realistic outcome if they break up. All the macho "kick her out" stuff in just internet hard man talk.

WrenBoy · 13-12-2019 05:28PM

facehugger99 wrote: »

Sounds like he grew more than a pair - "over the last five years has put on about 4/5 stone and doesnt look after himself."

Jesus - I don't blame the wife for going after someone a bit more palatable.

ITman88 wrote: »

Kinda true this. I’m sure in a marriage when your partner puts on 4 or 5 stone the attraction withers and dies!!
It’s a lack of respect towards a partner not to make an effort after the gain of 2 or 3 stone!

No Fat Chicks

Also dont get married its a lose-lose for men

ILoveYourVibes · 13-12-2019 05:28PM

no

13-12-2019 05:29PM

Has anyone here (with kids) ever cheated on their husband/wife?

Fr_Dougal · 13-12-2019 05:38PM

7/10

Not a bad effort, OP.

corner of hells · 13-12-2019 05:41PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Has anyone here (with kids) ever cheated on their husband/wife?

Yeah , I did.

ITman88 · 13-12-2019 05:48PM

WrenBoy wrote: »

No Fat Chicks

Also dont get married its a lose-lose for men

I think your right. When you think about the idea it’s crazy, Telling someone you want to marry them and will love them no matter what, the risk of that someone then changing radically doesn’t seem worth the reward. . .

ILoveYourVibes · 13-12-2019 05:51PM

Originally Posted by WrenBoy View Post
No Fat Chicks

Also dont get married its a lose-lose for men

That's why you don't get to choose. You just have to! Or she denies you the boobies!

Car99 · 13-12-2019 05:53PM

Arra tell him take her back save a lot of hassle looking for a new one, getting divorced, explaining to the kids.

ILoveYourVibes · 13-12-2019 05:55PM

Car99 wrote: »

Arra tell him take her back save a lot of hassle looking for a new one, getting divorced, explaining to the kids.

Kids don't notice things mothers do.....she could be gone for yrs and they would just notice the washing up piles!

Edgware · 13-12-2019 05:55PM

Tell her that you will ask the brother to take her back once she "entertains" you once a week

ITman88 · 13-12-2019 05:55PM

Car99 wrote: »

Arra tell him take her back save a lot of hassle looking for a new one, getting divorced, explaining to the kids.

Ara tis handier really I suppose! Fierce hassle looking for a new one and it might need a lot of work!!!

ILoveYourVibes · 13-12-2019 05:56PM

Edgware wrote: »

Tell her that you will ask the brother to take her back once she "entertains" you once a week

Do you wanna be ..where your brother has been?

gifted · 13-12-2019 06:00PM

Tony_Clifton wrote: »

my brothers wife, it transpires was as having a sexual affair(going on months) with a younger man from her work.
the brother found out, pictures, text messages etc.
when it came the the young stud ran a mile.
now the brothers wife is begging for my brother to take her back and save their marriage for the sake of the kids.
they both are still in family home she refuses to leave and wants him to forgot about everything and move on.
to be honest i never liked her she has sucked the life out of brother since they got married.
very high opinion of herself and always looking for attention.
the brother hasnt helped the situation and over the last five years has put on about 4/5 stone and doesnt look after himself.
she said just wanted to feel "sexy" and wanted.
im afraid to give him advice as i think he should walk and never look back, but i know the family is important
any advice ?

Wonder what she sucked out of the young buck?

GaGa21 · 13-12-2019 06:03PM

A one night stand, even a sexual affair I may forgive. Sex is sex and we're all only human! Especially if there were problems in the marriage. But both parties would have to be committed to change to work things out.

An emotional, sexual, love affair? Now there would be no going back from that betrayal.

MrAbyss · 13-12-2019 06:10PM

I know quite a few couples who survived an affair - both men and women - what can I say true love survived. The reasons are often complex for why people have affairs. It's not always sex. Sometimes circumstances change in life, other times it can be akin to a kind of nervous breakdown. I try not to judge people too much this way anymore.

nullzero · 13-12-2019 06:10PM

Four pages in and not a single mention of a chastity belt?

Montage of Feck · 13-12-2019 06:16PM

He now has a free pass.;)

Signore Fancy Pants · 13-12-2019 06:25PM

My advice is to close your account and re-reg as your brothers wife and tell us all the details.

Durty!

Airyfairy12 · 13-12-2019 06:29PM

It would depend on the circumstances. People cheat for different reasons and I wouldnt be so quick to end a marriage over it, unless it was a situation were one partner was a serial cheater or had fallen out of love/wanted an escape from the marriage, I think there can be genuine reasons why someone would stray, saying that im not condoning the behavior but you never know whats going on behind closed doors or inside someones head.
You said she just wanted to feel sexy and your brother gained weight, sounds like she still loves him but the spark has been gone for awhile, who knows what else is lying underneath the surface and youre only getting one side of the story, of which you are biased as he is your brother, it is natural for you to take his side completely.

For everyones sake you should really keep out of it. If they get back together after your interfering and persuading your brother to leave it could negatively effect your relationship with your brother.
If he decides to end it - influenced by your persuasion - he could very much hold resentment for you down the line. It comes across as though your hate for the wife overrides your brothers wants and happiness. He's an adult who is capable of making his own decisions. Offer support but keep out of it.

Fiftyfilthy · 13-12-2019 06:29PM

No sympathy really, he’s 4-5 stone overweight. She has every right to sleep around imho

ArchXStanton · 13-12-2019 06:29PM

WrenBoy wrote: »

Ya, I know if it were me I could never see them the same, In the back of your mind you'd always be wondering if its happening again.

You'll only give them a green light to do it again

corner of hells · 13-12-2019 06:30PM

If the OP waited for a couple of hours the drunks and crazies would be in , their advice is the best advice.

XsApollo · 13-12-2019 06:30PM

I would.

Spanish Eyes · 13-12-2019 06:33PM

Very gently wondering if this is your Sister in Law and not your own wife. Sorry now if I have misinterpreted, and wouldn't blame you for being circumspect at all.

But no, it would be all over for me anyway. Wanderers will wander forever more.

skallywag · 13-12-2019 06:39PM

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Very gently wondering...

How does one wonder something in a gentle way? Is there rough and gentle wondering now?

Church on Tuesday · 13-12-2019 06:43PM

I feel sorry for your Brother TBH.

13-12-2019 06:46PM

Nope. I don't buy the sympathy for her situation. Marriage is a serious commitment and communication is necessary for any relationship to continue. If she wanted him to lose the weight, she should have done what most wives have done through the ages. Nag. It's not as if it's uncommon for Irish couples to be a bit overweight.

If the nagging is not enough, attempts for both of them to exercise together fails, or managing his diet goes nowhere, then leave him. Basically, be a wife who influences her husband rather than simply passing off responsibility for the situation. Cheating is just wrong under any "normal" circumstances. Fine, if they've talked and they'd agreed towards some kind of open relationship (not my thing, but i know some couples who survive because of it). However, it just sounds like she cheated, and the weight is just a convenient excuse.

And no, Obviously, I wouldn't continue such a relationship. I was cheated on once before in a long term relationship, "forgave" her, was cheated on again. People who cheat tend to do it again, and again..... Get Solicitor advice, organise the situation, and get her out of the picture.

Would you take you wife back if she cheated?

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