Will Joe be Gone Til November like Wyclef Jean? Liveline: 17/09/2019 to date

SEPT 23 1989 · 09-10-2019 04:37PM

sligojoek wrote: »

I think AD was wondering how many weeks.

230k seized in accounts

Sir Oxman · 09-10-2019 05:33PM

One of those lowlife lads getting money from DUBLIN CITY COUNCIL (I'm still flabbergasted over that) was caught keeping a fully grown female jaguar and another thing with fangs that'd eat you in his garage in Ballyer.

ButtersSuki · 09-10-2019 05:53PM

Was driving back from Cork so got to hear my first full Lahv Lahn in approx 6months so to speak and (your beautiful) bhoy did it deliver:

De cruelest cut
De versaaaaaaaaaatis
De pain
De not so subtle will somewan pay for me versaaaaatis?
Amateur dramatics and Matty Matticks
Trump and Pence
John Deere tractor followed by “dear” pun
Duz it look like a tractor?
Guff x infinity
Stupid giggles x infinity
Joe fascinated by Dubalin people meeting outside Dubalin
De M50
Cement beggar beggars belief with her brazenness
Taxi drivers
Taxi driver’s wives
“Dat won’t butter many parsnips” (we haven’t had that in a while)
Some attempt at Wordsmithing with “liquid love could fill Lough Neagh”
Zimbabwe
Cyprus
Colleen Rooney x infinity
Wagada Christie
And more!

Edit: “the thick plottens” - we’ll be waiting a long time to beat that one for stupidity.

One for the ages - and by that I mean to illustrate what a completely self-indulgent dirty protest of a shlt show Da Lahv Lahn is. An utter disgrace and embarrassment were it done for free.

09-10-2019 06:08PM

Sir Oxman wrote: »

One of those lowlife lads getting money from DUBLIN CITY COUNCIL (I'm still flabbergasted over that) was caught keeping a fully grown female jaguar and another thing with fangs that'd eat you in his garage in Ballyer.

Two Ballyer men with Jaguars in de garage so to speak, one on the radio occasionally.

09-10-2019 06:23PM

I’m not a bit surprised to hear about the council paying protection money, not a bit. I know a now long retired staff member used to have to pay it (out of own pocket I think) to park car in public car park in same area we’re talking about.

The trouble is for one reason or another the guards wouldn’t or couldn’t step in. I have heard of council staff working in certain areas being threatened just for going to work in the area, and not as a rent collector/enforcer. That’s why so many places have for years appeared hideously neglected. Local Mob Rule / Mafia was/is in force in some places. It was/is awful for the decent people living in these places, and to survive they have to develop a certain tolerance for unlawfulness & disorder or else aspire to move to a better area.

09-10-2019 07:31PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I’m not a bit surprised to hear about the council paying protection money, not a bit. I know a now long retired staff member used to have to pay it (out of own pocket I think) to park car in public car park in same area we’re talking about.

Reclaimable on expenses, I hope! (Unreceipted expense)

sligojoek · 09-10-2019 07:44PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Two Ballyer men with Jaguars in de garage so to speak, one on the radio occasionally.

Post of the day.

09-10-2019 08:20PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Reclaimable on expenses, I hope! (Unreceipted expense)

I half doubt if it’s still happening as everything has become much more accountable in every way, eg trackers on vehicles. When I first entered the corpo, in my Department only the two most senior people could handle the petty cash. In later years almost any staff member could handle it, of course documenting it properly, and my colleagues were almost universally trustworthy with very odd exceptions. The latter could be creative in a small way with it, but the amounts were generally very small. Where most of the dishonesty I encountered, and done by the same few people (same as ones creative with Kerry cash) was “time in lieu”, where ostensibly staff would be doing other jobs on council time.

There was a case somewhere where a person who was more creative with accounts put the blame on a totally honest friend of mine when things got found out. Things were tightened up in more recent years, all for the good, if a bit more cumbersome in administration. In earlier times the very worst got promotion (along with excellent deserving people). There has been considerable nepotism in areas of the public service that I know about. But it’s all just a microcosm of life in general and the way it works.

09-10-2019 08:23PM

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Was driving back from Cork so got to hear my first full Lahv Lahn in approx 6months so to speak and (your beautiful) bhoy did it deliver:

De cruelest cut
De versaaaaaaaaaatis
De pain
De not so subtle will somewan pay for me versaaaaatis?
Amateur dramatics and Matty
Trump and Pence
John Deere tractor followed by “dear” pun
Duz it look like a tractor?
Guff x infinity
Stupid giggles x infinity
Joe fascinated by Dubalin people meeting outside Dubalin
De M50
Cement beggar beggars belief with her brazenness
Taxi drivers
Taxi driver’s wives
“Dat won’t butter many parsnips” (we haven’t had that in a while)
Some attempt at Wordsmithing with “liquid love could fill Lough Neagh”
Zimbabwe
Cyprus
Colleen Rooney x infinity
Wagada Christie
And more!

One for the ages - and by that I mean to illustrate what a complete self-indigent dirty protest of a shlt show Da Lahv Lahn is. An utter disgrace and embarrassment were it done for free.

Butters, did ya ever think of doing work for de redtops? You are a shooh-in.

09-10-2019 08:31PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I half doubt if it’s still happening as everything has become much more accountable in every way, eg trackers on vehicles. When I first entered the corpo, in my Department only the two most senior people could handle the petty cash. In later years almost any staff member could handle it, of course documenting it properly, and my colleagues were almost universally trustworthy with very odd exceptions. The latter could be creative in a small way with it, but the amounts were generally very small. Where most of the dishonesty I encountered, and done by the same few people (same as ones creative with Kerry cash) was “time in lieu”, where ostensibly staff would be doing other jobs on council time.

There was a case somewhere where a person who was more creative with accounts put the blame on a totally honest friend of mine when things got found out. Things were tightened up in more recent years, all for the good, if a bit more cumbersome in administration. In earlier times the very worst got promotion (along with excellent deserving people). There has been considerable nepotism in areas of the public service that I know about. But it’s all just a microcosm of life in general and the way it works.

Apologies. My reply was tongue-in-cheek; no offence meant whatsoever.

Field east · 09-10-2019 08:34PM

2smiggy wrote: »

'the thick plottens' ??

Did he actually say dat? I

09-10-2019 08:39PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Apologies. My reply was tongue-in-cheek; no offence meant whatsoever.

Absolutely zero offence taken-I was thinking you had a point and was mulling over my life and knowledge of public service. I had some close encounters with the odd unsavoury person in it. It caused a major health issue that could have proved fatal, so I never want to think too much back.

09-10-2019 08:53PM

Versatis indication can be read here, it’s in the singular:

https://www.medicines.org.uk/emc/product/290/smpc

Odyssey 2005 · 09-10-2019 09:32PM

Field east wrote: »

Did he actually say dat? I

He sure did :eek:

09-10-2019 09:54PM

Odyssey 2005 wrote: »

He sure did :eek:

I thought I was hearing things and posted what st least I thought he said, would be appropriate for LL thread anyways. Then I saw it confirmed by others. To be honest it’s an easy type of thing to say, spoonerism methinks.

But it was funny

Conor84 · 09-10-2019 09:54PM

I know Marian Finucane says she does her research y listening to the radio and reading papers during the week -nice- nut Joe seems to do his research during the programme on the Eye Pad and if he comes across that is interesting he feels the need to share it with the listeners straight off.

The poor lads in the trailer waiting to hear back about the Garda reserve must be doubly pissed off by the public service as they are still waiting to talk to Joe about it. Although in fairness they couldn't have expected the morning's news story of Coleen Rooney's Facebook account to break on the day and then need regular coverage by reading from the Eye Pad on this caller driven show. The Extinction Rebellion protesters pencilled in from Monday must think that Joe is extinct by now. I notice a new producer name at the end of the show today so maybe he was taking liberties with the Eye pad.

Wonder what Morning Ireland ever did to him? Every other day he mentions whatever he was iistening to on BBC Radio 4 Today programme. Today he was listening to his good friend Paschal O'Donoghue being interviewed on BBC from Bewleys in Grafton Lane and having a go that the BBC got something wrong. Imagine that would never happen with Joe on the mic.

ButtersSuki · 09-10-2019 10:14PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Absolutely zero offence taken-I was thinking you had a point and was mulling over my life and knowledge of public service.

And tank you for yer service.

ButtersSuki · 09-10-2019 10:16PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Butters, did ya ever think of doing work for de redtops? You are a shooh-in.

Yes, but after having some of my finest works published in Viz the red tops seem rather easy by comparison so to speak.

ButtersSuki · 09-10-2019 10:18PM

Just realised I forgot to include “the thick plottens” in my synopsis of the show. Every time I think he can’t be any dumber.....

09-10-2019 10:32PM

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Just realised I forgot to include “the thick plottens” in my synopsis of the show. Every time I think he can’t be any dumber.....

I’m gonna bloody well say in ordinary daily speech some day “the thick plottens” , I find mocking is catching so to speak, and especially in de speaking so to speak.

ButtersSuki · 09-10-2019 10:38PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I’m gonna bloody well say in ordinary daily speech some day “the thick plottens” , I find mocking is catching so to speak, and especially in de speaking so to speak.

A malapropism for de ages so to speak.

Jeff2 · 09-10-2019 10:46PM

Field east wrote: »

Did he actually say dat? I

In fairness he was reading something from the ipad that said that comment.

But I'v no idea how he got from talking about boring stuff to then get excited about boring Wags posting stuff online.

He will loose the old people with free license if he keeps that up.

Conor84 · 09-10-2019 11:30PM

Would love to see a proper Liveline Bingo Card. Wouldn't dare to do it myself with all you long experienced callers but here's my take if someone does do it with some of my own Top 10s (more or less......)

Caller Phrases

1 It’s A Disgrace Joe
2 I’m Entitled
3 On The Spectrum
4 Special Needs
5 I’ve Worked All My Life
6 Never Had a Holiday
7 I’ve Never Asked the Gubberment for Anything
8 GDPR
9 I’m Not Racist But …
10 Can I name them, Joe?
Honourable but Dated Mention – Where’s my Nama, Joe?

Joe’s Favourite Subjects

1 Dead Chisler
2 Death (All Ages)
3 Pain
4 Cancer
5 Any Illness
6 Versatis
7 Graveyards
8 Lost and Found
9 Dublin In The Rare Ould Times
10 Bukes And Art

Joe To His Favourite Callers

1 Petal
2 Well Done, Well Done
3 You’re still a young man/woman
4 Thank You For Your Service
5 Your Butttttiful Son
6 You’re A Wonderful Mother
7 Your Gorgeous Boy
8 Are you sitting down?
9 Are you with someone?
10 Have a cup of tea .. back after the break

Joe’s Favourite Questions

1 How did he diiiieeee?
2 Describe the pain?
3 What frame did you put on that?
4 Did you check him?
5 What’s his difference?
6 Was he unwell?
7 Was he robust? (Children assaulting parents)
8 Are you cast down?
9 What colour was the … car/dog/house/glasses?
10 Maybe you can drop it into a Presbytry? Where You’ll Find A Padre

Joe’s Favourite Remarks

1 A Sophisticated Scam
2 I Was Listening to the BBC
3 Remember you have to Earn €2000 to pay €1000
4 20 Jobs .. Wow,, That’s 20 families …
5 Crippled With Taxes
6 The Cruellest Cut
7 Bad Bad Bastard
8 Overlooked (Car Tolls, Dr Sam and his tax, Criminal Record in Ireland and Australia)
9 Money Making Quangos – Repak, Private Security Authority, Residential Tenancies Board (definitely NOT RTE and the License Fee)
10 The Wunderful …….. Christy Dignam, Fr Iggy, Mannix, Random Author, Random Artist, Random RTE Star

Joe Under Pressure

1 Bad Line, Bad Line
2 Expunge! Expunge!
3 You Can’t Say That
4 Your Aul Guff
5 I’ll Calm Down when You Calm Down
6 Don’t Do The Accent
7 A Fantastic Well Respected Company

Atlantic Dawn · 09-10-2019 11:45PM

The Palmarians havn't been mentioned in a while, perhaps the second eleventeenth coming is near.

ButtersSuki · 10-10-2019 03:51AM

Conor84 wrote: »

Would love to see a proper Liveline Bingo Card. Wouldn't dare to do it myself with all you long experienced callers but here's my take if someone does do it with some of my own Top 10s (more or less......)

Caller Phrases

1 It’s A Disgrace Joe
2 I’m Entitled
3 On The Spectrum
4 Special Needs
5 I’ve Worked All My Life
6 Never Had a Holiday
7 I’ve Never Asked the Gubberment for Anything
8 GDPR
9 I’m Not Racist But …
10 Can I name them, Joe?
Honourable but Dated Mention – Where’s my Nama, Joe?

Joe’s Favourite Subjects

1 Dead Chisler
2 Death (All Ages)
3 Pain
4 Cancer
5 Any Illness
6 Versatis
7 Graveyards
8 Lost and Found
9 Dublin In The Rare Ould Times
10 Bukes And Art

Joe To His Favourite Callers

1 Petal
2 Well Done, Well Done
3 You’re still a young man/woman
4 Thank You For Your Service
5 Your Butttttiful Son
6 You’re A Wonderful Mother
7 Your Gorgeous Boy
8 Are you sitting down?
9 Are you with someone?
10 Have a cup of tea .. back after the break

Joe’s Favourite Questions

1 How did he diiiieeee?
2 Describe the pain?
3 What frame did you put on that?
4 Did you check him?
5 What’s his difference?
6 Was he unwell?
7 Was he robust? (Children assaulting parents)
8 Are you cast down?
9 What colour was the … car/dog/house/glasses?
10 Maybe you can drop it into a Presbytry? Where You’ll Find A Padre

Joe’s Favourite Remarks

1 A Sophisticated Scam
2 I Was Listening to the BBC
3 Remember you have to Earn €2000 to pay €1000
4 20 Jobs .. Wow,, That’s 20 families …
5 Crippled With Taxes
6 The Cruellest Cut
7 Bad Bad Bastard
8 Overlooked (Car Tolls, Dr Sam and his tax, Criminal Record in Ireland and Australia)
9 Money Making Quangos – Repak, Private Security Authority, Residential Tenancies Board (definitely NOT RTE and the License Fee)
10 The Wunderful …….. Christy Dignam, Fr Iggy, Mannix, Random Author, Random Artist, Random RTE Star

Joe Under Pressure

1 Bad Line, Bad Line
2 Expunge! Expunge!
3 You Can’t Say That
4 Your Aul Guff
5 I’ll Calm Down when You Calm Down
6 Don’t Do The Accent
7 A Fantastic Well Respected Company

How dare you! Don’t defame de original and bestest Lahv Lahv Buzzword Bingo Card so to speak!

Note: sligojoek will be along shortly to remind me that I promised a new one many moons ago....

Mena Mitty · 10-10-2019 06:49AM

'InSoFarAs' needs a mention.

sligojoek · 10-10-2019 08:55AM

Safe in the arms of our lady queen of heaven.

My all time favourite.

The blows won't get lighter but your shoulders become stronger.

Yesterday's Lough Neagh and buttering parsnips is up there too.

Odyssey 2005 · 10-10-2019 08:56AM

I think mr D's offering today will be 75 minutes of Wageta Krustygate. I have the popcorn ready.;)

Beechwoodspark · 10-10-2019 08:59AM

Don’t forget his regular enough airing of a nonsense phrase

“Mor yaaa”

ButtersSuki · 10-10-2019 09:04AM

From all de way back in March 2-12 so to speak. De more tings change, de more day stay de same....dis is so old now it even predates the use of "so to speak" so to speak!

Will Joe be Gone Til November like Wyclef Jean? Liveline: 17/09/2019 to date

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